I'm 100% curious how someone could take such terrible photos and then actually use them for a listing. How can they think those photos are acceptable in any way? Did they take them with their eyes closed, and then also upload them with their eyes closed ? What's going on here
The answer is the declining mental health of an old person. The house hasnt changed in nearly 50 years. Thats not someone playing with a full deck. This person is probably socially isolated as well,
Most of them don't even show any actual features of the house, they're focusing on corners of ceilings and old boomer clutter, even when you flip the pic the right side up. Did they even realize they're supposed to be showing the actual rooms? Did that thought ever cross their mind? Or did they just spin in a circle and randomly press the shutter?
What did they think the photos were for, to show the world the tops of the overgrown trees outside? Or the painted line in the street? There's not even any context of where the fkn trees are in relation to the house! And TWO pictures of a tarnished ceiling light from 1982???! Like WTF even is this, I'm getting angry about it now 😂 this is unforgivable!!
I think they were trying to show rooms but wanted to not show big piles of clutter (or worse) in the parts left out. Like they think they got 'enough' of each section that you surely must be able to extrapolate what the rest looks like... and have such bad vision that the quality is "fine".
As for the sideways pic... I got nothing. Brain issues from mold and microplastics?
I think the sideways pics is them assuming the user will rotate the printed photo in the correct orientation...and them too old to understand why that won't work.
I'm not sad after seeing the +$50,000 price increase within a week of listing it the first time and the mention of "all the other houses sold for $1 million."
I just know it's a greedy old boomer who paid $30,000 for it 50 years ago and is now trying to make over half a million dollars off a rotten leaky roof, deferred maintenance, and young people's desperation 🙄
Maybe the owner was trying to pique our curiosity. “Oh, I see the room has a corner; I wonder what the rest of the room looks like. Guess I’ll have to go see it!”
NOPE I've seen all I need to see. I have browsed the additional pictures in the listing and they only added to my anger. Those "photos" are offensive, I am offended.
Maybe they used one of those cameras attached to the family cat, and they were so proud of the photos that 'Mr. Business' took that they just felt bad not using them.
I deeply apologize to those in the chimpanzee community for my ignorance and humbly beg your forgiveness and deepest pardon. Rest assured, it will NOT happen again.
“No Damned realtor is getting a dime from me. I’ll throw in the treasure laden contents for 100k CASH ONLY. There is more treasure than you could ever know what to do with. It’s underneath there somewhere.”
Ok but the plastic wrap on the easy chair to protect the fabric from dirty hands and greasy hair is epic. I can smell the cigarette and old man smell from here.
Grody.
The house is a stone's throw away from two different million dollar houses, but one's on two acres and the other has 800 more square feet and probably has been updated more than once since 1970.
I clicked into the listing thinking, surely OP just picked the worst shots they can’t all be this bad. 60 photos later I stand corrected. If this is how they list the home, think about what a negotiation will be like!
that honestly means nothing. Tax assessments throughout the country all seem to be different percentages of real value. I have seen 20% and I have seen nearly 100%.
I am sure the tax assessment assumes it is in at least semi move in condition though. This house needs $100K mininum to be able to move in.
Also this one appears to be a foreeclosure listed by the forclosing party. it says
'Looks like the White house with its portico, matches the clubhouse at the nearby golf course. Very large, old trees front and backyard. Great neighborhood'
They are out of their fucking minds thinking they are getting almost 700k for this place. It’s filthy and falling apart. There’s also no way it’s 4000sqft.
I rarely say this but looks like a teardown. Don’t see any good bones to this house and am afraid we might find real ones. That said, it looks like a lovely, wooded lot.
I work a job where I get to look at the insides of many homes for sale. Viewing photos like this often tells a story, about past residents. This one is very sad. Old, sick, and broke.
That house is in atrocious shape. Youll be lucky if that roof is the only thing that needs replacing. They’re going to have a tough time selling this place if they’re serious about that no concessions bit
Owner to the real estate agent, probably: "clean, declutter and staging? I don't need no stinkin' clean declutter and staging! Photos? I can do better than anyone because it's MY HOME and I know it better! Be off with you, I'll do it myself". And so they did. So they did.
This is why an agent is worth a lot. If they had a good one they wouldn’t be fiddlefucking around for almost a year. Nobody’s gonna look at this.
I bet agents get irritated with people like this though. I bet it’s like pulling teeth to get them to clean their shit up.
There needs to be a reality show that features agents working with dumb, incompetent sellers. I would tune in 🍿
We've sold four properties now and I bet we are dreamy sellers for our agent. Property is always clean as a pin, personal items and clutter put AWAY, all small cosmetic things DONE. Priced right for the market. Every property has gone under contract in a handful of days. I feel like we subsidize shitty sellers, lol.
I sold my home on my own and my description and photos were ten times better than any agents in the area. My apartment was the most clearly stated, the best photos in order from room to room.
Way overpriced & you would need to add maybe $200K in renovations if not more. Plus the outside looks neglected too & so you need to add costs of new landscaping.
Wow man! They got some good c*ack in that hood. I absolutely love those pics, its says to me. Ready to move in and start breaking bad! Coup de grâce is the price over half a mil for a teardown. Damn!
I cannot stop wondering wtf is going on with the chair half covered in plastic… I would forever have the heebie jeebies if I lived in this house after seeing these pictures…
Wow, I felt like I was falling down the stairs on the next continent over just from flipping through those pictures. Does it come with a warranty and a gyroscope?
Looks like the White house with its portico, matches the clubhouse at the nearby golf course. Very large, old trees front and backyard. Great neighborhood
Looks like the ending montage of an epic netflix series chronicling the decline of a family over multiple generations
Like the aftermath of a 1970s serial killer documentary.
I was thinking a nice version of TSM.
Literally came to say that this looks like the house from "Weapons"
Art imitates reality.
r/GreyGardens_Beales
Yeah, I haven't seen such a large bottle of Canadian Club since the 80s.
I was just thinking it looks like a collection of photos randomly taken over the past few decades!
I like a funny situation, where the owner found some random photos of their home, and couldn’t be bothered to take proper photos
Or the Sandy Passage episode of Documentary Now 😂
I'm 100% curious how someone could take such terrible photos and then actually use them for a listing. How can they think those photos are acceptable in any way? Did they take them with their eyes closed, and then also upload them with their eyes closed ? What's going on here
The photographer was being chased by a pack of angry rats.
That's how my mother died...
Likely a pack of rats of unusual size
The answer is the declining mental health of an old person. The house hasnt changed in nearly 50 years. Thats not someone playing with a full deck. This person is probably socially isolated as well,
https://preview.redd.it/vwt8vx66tk8g1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8e959b92d309f8ff0ee6fa9901da4436ecc1d48c
I think you're right. The price history is wacky too.
“It’s not selling? Raise the price!“
Yeah housing markets never change.
Well said. This is likely a widow or widower in cognitive decline and social isolation.
My thoughts as well. Looking like dementia possibly.
Their feet, they took them with their feet, using their big toe to push the trigger on a Kodak 110.
Most of them don't even show any actual features of the house, they're focusing on corners of ceilings and old boomer clutter, even when you flip the pic the right side up. Did they even realize they're supposed to be showing the actual rooms? Did that thought ever cross their mind? Or did they just spin in a circle and randomly press the shutter? What did they think the photos were for, to show the world the tops of the overgrown trees outside? Or the painted line in the street? There's not even any context of where the fkn trees are in relation to the house! And TWO pictures of a tarnished ceiling light from 1982???! Like WTF even is this, I'm getting angry about it now 😂 this is unforgivable!!
Are you not entertained?
It's definitely entertaining, in a dark and morbid kind of way 😂
I think they were trying to show rooms but wanted to not show big piles of clutter (or worse) in the parts left out. Like they think they got 'enough' of each section that you surely must be able to extrapolate what the rest looks like... and have such bad vision that the quality is "fine".
As for the sideways pic... I got nothing. Brain issues from mold and microplastics?
I think the sideways pics is them assuming the user will rotate the printed photo in the correct orientation...and them too old to understand why that won't work.
No, this makes me sad.
I'm not sad after seeing the +$50,000 price increase within a week of listing it the first time and the mention of "all the other houses sold for $1 million." I just know it's a greedy old boomer who paid $30,000 for it 50 years ago and is now trying to make over half a million dollars off a rotten leaky roof, deferred maintenance, and young people's desperation 🙄
Maybe the owner was trying to pique our curiosity. “Oh, I see the room has a corner; I wonder what the rest of the room looks like. Guess I’ll have to go see it!”
"Ah yes, I see the faint suggestion of a window in that overexposed and upsidedown photo. I must see these 20th century windows in person!"
There are more pics in the listing. Terrible pics but you get a better sense of it.
NOPE I've seen all I need to see. I have browsed the additional pictures in the listing and they only added to my anger. Those "photos" are offensive, I am offended.
I just commented that I believe this is actually Rage Bait Zillow listing… first I’ve seen
62 pics and they are ALL bad.
They can't figure out how to take an in focus photo, but were able to upload them and create a listing. Make it make sense.
We gave our 3yo and 5yo digital kid cameras and this is the quality of pictures we see but a lot more of them.
They strapped the camera on their dog/2 yr old toddler and let them run around the house.
If I didn’t know better I would think someone scanned physical photos they already had from photomat and uploaded them.
"adjoining neighbors all sold for over a million in the last year, which is surprising"
With that attitude, it certainly is.
Maybe they used one of those cameras attached to the family cat, and they were so proud of the photos that 'Mr. Business' took that they just felt bad not using them.
Photo number two was especially what the fuck.
https://preview.redd.it/6kexqx7h9m8g1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c14bc6bf60063a8f82765e69c1828e920e57b662
And these two, the first one tells us all we need to know but then they add in a slightly different angle just to be sure 😂
Drugs!
I know what I got
The photographer was a ghost.
Did they hire a chimpanzee to take the pictures?
That's an insult to chimpanzees.
https://preview.redd.it/oqokfkdh5l8g1.jpeg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=284a389f9b6f6a626860fecddb289ca308c09ea8
If there was a chimpanzee that could take pictures of your listing, I would hire him.
Even if this was the result.
As a chimpanzee photographer, I take offense to that
I deeply apologize to those in the chimpanzee community for my ignorance and humbly beg your forgiveness and deepest pardon. Rest assured, it will NOT happen again.
Thank you, I will convey your sincere sentiments to our chimpanzee leader, EEEP EEP!
Has the owner removed the corpse(s) yet ?
Yeah but the meth lab is still in the basement.
No meth in the basement, just really old liquor bottles and 50 years of nicotine stains.
how convenient. On the short list for me, I need my meth.... lol
It is really a shame that zillow doesn't have that as one of their search parameters. Finding a good meth lab is tough these days.
Don't be ridiculous, that's excellent garden fertilizer.
The owner is the corpse.
Nothing new has entered that home since 1973.
Or left. Pretty sure these photos were taken by the ghosts of the last owners.
Wrong, there is a flat screen tv on a counter in one of the photos. But other than that you are correct.
I did see a flat screen TV in the really bad pictures, so maybe 1 thing...
Listing is lacking, "Serious buyers only! No tire kickers; I know what I got!" statement but nevertheless works that vibe through end to end.
This house screams deferred maintenance.
See the box fan? Owner hasn't been running a/c. Probably a serious mold problem.
At least 20 years of it
I love the extendo-chandelier because those other 4 lamps just weren't cutting it
“No Damned realtor is getting a dime from me. I’ll throw in the treasure laden contents for 100k CASH ONLY. There is more treasure than you could ever know what to do with. It’s underneath there somewhere.”
Ok but the plastic wrap on the easy chair to protect the fabric from dirty hands and greasy hair is epic. I can smell the cigarette and old man smell from here. Grody.
I take it he doesn't want to sell.
Maybe they realize they have to clean it if they do.
“adjoining neighbors all sold for over a million in the last year, which is surprising.”
Not the only surprising thing here…
And if you look at the adjoining neighbors, uh, no they didn’t.
The house is a stone's throw away from two different million dollar houses, but one's on two acres and the other has 800 more square feet and probably has been updated more than once since 1970.
You guys have it wrong. I see this as ultra impressive. It's incredibly difficult in 2025 to take photos this badly, these guys have excelled.
Edit: typo
It might be that the photos aren't from 2025.
Yea, he had to do a lot of effort to take pictures this bad.... for sure...
These photos look like someone found an old roll of film and had it developed to see what was there.
Exactly! I was wondering why it looked like someone took pics of old photos.
Those professional pics always make the rooms look bigger than they really are.
More photos of overgrown brush and potential issues with whatever those vines are doing than actual usable house photos.
I think "those vines" might be Himalayan Blackberries. If so, time to abandon the house; it's theirs now.
That's a lot to ask for a fixer-upper with a leaky roof.
I noticed that it was first listed in April for a little less, and then they upped the asking.
They upped it after the neighbors sold for $1M. The house will probably just get demolished anyway.
There's something actually artistic about that last photo. Like it portrays death.
Someone died in this house. Probably even still dead in the house somewhere.
Some of the photos are from like 30 years ago.
I should write these things: “Under-sized, sagging beam in the sunroom creates an overhead water feature.”
Estate sale? Executor overwhelmed and not interested in doing more than bare minimum? That’s my guess.
Highlights: "1000 chandelier!"
"adjoining neighbors all sold for over a million in the last year, which is surprising"
"Owner Occupied"
AND
“Looks like the White House” yes. After Trump demolished the East Wing.
Once upon a time, in the land of wishful thinking, an owner listed their house for sale...
This listing is a classic example of why you should go through a realtor.
Way over-priced as it needs a lot of work.
Save this for the next time folks complain about overly-staged, super wide angle lens photo sets
Virgin Suicides af
it's giving facebook boomer post
Old person died and their heirs just want to get rid of it.
Were the photos taken by a GoPro mounted on a cat collar?
i feel like someone spun me around blindfolded and then sent me off to take pictures of the house.
I clicked into the listing thinking, surely OP just picked the worst shots they can’t all be this bad. 60 photos later I stand corrected. If this is how they list the home, think about what a negotiation will be like!
It's tax assessment is half of what it is selling for.
that honestly means nothing. Tax assessments throughout the country all seem to be different percentages of real value. I have seen 20% and I have seen nearly 100%.
I am sure the tax assessment assumes it is in at least semi move in condition though. This house needs $100K mininum to be able to move in.
Also this one appears to be a foreeclosure listed by the forclosing party. it says
'Looks like the White house with its portico, matches the clubhouse at the nearby golf course. Very large, old trees front and backyard. Great neighborhood'
It also says owner occupied.
But ... it's so beautifully staged and photographed!!
Elderly person or couple no longer able to maintain the house for the last 25 or 30 years vibes.
Why isn’t the front door in the center? That drives me nuts.
Photo number 5 looks like fine art photography.
So, ya know, it’s not all bad.
Each room is slanted at a different angle. That’s part of the fun of this house!
Fixed link for Old Reddit: https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/3210-Sumac-Dr-S-Salem-OR-97302/53043804_zpid/
Did they scan in a bunch of 35mm slides to get their photos?
The camera they used to take the pictures is as old as the house.
"I'm not paying some agent 5% to sit on his ass and do nothing!"
--this guy, probably
God damn. Those photos are what you would find if you developed the disposable camera that you found in that blood soaked backpack in the woods.
This looks like an Ethyl Cain album shoot
Sure this house isn't on Elm Street?
Are these Polaroids?
Did the house ghost take these pictures?
Well the sideways pictures were a ride but Lordy that house is a tear down. No way fixing all that is affordable
Owner would habe been better off strapping a go-pro camera on an epileptic monkey's head and posting those pics.
Is this the house from Grey Gardens?
I think even if this owner sold, for any price, it would be hard to get him and his junk out
I say we nuke it from orbit.
Unserious seller gets unserious offer. I’d go $200k.
”adjoining neighbors all sold for over a million in the last year, which is surprising.”
😂😂🤣😂🤣
I bark-laughed when I swiped to the second photo. Glorious.
They are out of their fucking minds thinking they are getting almost 700k for this place. It’s filthy and falling apart. There’s also no way it’s 4000sqft.
Absolutely 100% NOT AI.
I rarely say this but looks like a teardown. Don’t see any good bones to this house and am afraid we might find real ones. That said, it looks like a lovely, wooded lot.
After seeing the photos I know exactly NOTHING more than I did before. 😑
Someone with either MH issues or dementia is selling this house.
I bet they also have terrible eyesight but refuse to wear glasses.
The listing is so bad it's almost unbelievable. It's quite sad really. I hope they have people in their lives who care about them :(
I feel like I can smell it from the pictures. "Roof needs to be replaced.... or at least some sections of it" ?!?!?!?! Yeesh.
How many pictures of the rotting shingles does this owner want to post?
These look like crime scene photos ngl
I love the close up of the garage roofline, that is the pic that sold me
It’s giving Grey Gardens. I wonder how many raccoons there are.
"No concessions to buying agent" okey dokey
I work a job where I get to look at the insides of many homes for sale. Viewing photos like this often tells a story, about past residents. This one is very sad. Old, sick, and broke.
That house is in atrocious shape. Youll be lucky if that roof is the only thing that needs replacing. They’re going to have a tough time selling this place if they’re serious about that no concessions bit
At least we know this isn’t AI staged!
Owner to the real estate agent, probably: "clean, declutter and staging? I don't need no stinkin' clean declutter and staging! Photos? I can do better than anyone because it's MY HOME and I know it better! Be off with you, I'll do it myself". And so they did. So they did.
Needs more cats.
Wow, this must be the first Rage Bait Zillow listing I’ve seen
The gutter doing double duty as a planter is a nice bonus
This is why an agent is worth a lot. If they had a good one they wouldn’t be fiddlefucking around for almost a year. Nobody’s gonna look at this.
I bet agents get irritated with people like this though. I bet it’s like pulling teeth to get them to clean their shit up.
There needs to be a reality show that features agents working with dumb, incompetent sellers. I would tune in 🍿
We've sold four properties now and I bet we are dreamy sellers for our agent. Property is always clean as a pin, personal items and clutter put AWAY, all small cosmetic things DONE. Priced right for the market. Every property has gone under contract in a handful of days. I feel like we subsidize shitty sellers, lol.
The Gordon Ramsey of real estate. “Home Selling Nightmares”
Grandpa took these pics
I love our fsbo, gimmie tens of thousands of dollars instead of bland ikea furniture staging any day.
Wow. What a mess.
Listed by Leatherface? That place is scary!!
The vines are tearing the house apart 🫣
Great pictures 😆 🤣 Someone doesn't want to sell, but was forced to list it.
I love everything about this, thank you. Love your post title too.
The staging is…
Mm hmm.... somebody died in dat house!
I sold my home on my own and my description and photos were ten times better than any agents in the area. My apartment was the most clearly stated, the best photos in order from room to room.
Some people just don't care I guess...
I'm reminded of some works of H. P. Lovecraft, talking about alien angles and decayed places.
Where is this photographer? I have a wedding coming up and wanna discuss packages 🤣🤣🤣
Dementia is a bitch.
r/confusingperspective
Were those pictures taken with a potato? wow.
700k in Salem Oregon. 🤣
I can smell it from here
690k seems too high. Maybe I am just picky.
Half the pictures are of trees. Like, don’t get me wrong, I love trees. But you’re selling a house.
It didn't sell at $640k, so naturally they increased the price by $50k. I'm going to guess elderly person with some dementia.
Looks like the house in the horror movie Weapons
Way overpriced & you would need to add maybe $200K in renovations if not more. Plus the outside looks neglected too & so you need to add costs of new landscaping.
Not one shit given.
The pictures are bad enough but then you see the porch roof and the leak along the seem inside. I'll pass, no need to look at it in person
Here's a link that works for everyone, and doesn't have tracking tags: https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/3210-Sumac-Dr-S-Salem-OR-97302/53043804_zpid
Strangely, the location on Zillow isn't even close to correct.
I guess they think the wine rack is a huge selling feature.
Cozy and quaint at under $175 PSF! Don't see that often.
This is some Grey Gardens shiz.
I looked at all 62 pics. Pics 31, 32, and 52 are among my favorites. Thanks for the laughter because I needed it!!
Was Animal House filmed here?
The house looks like its eyes are too far apart
Blair-Witch-ass listing.
I think I saw Bigfoot across the street.
Haunted AF
AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAH!
Wow man! They got some good c*ack in that hood. I absolutely love those pics, its says to me. Ready to move in and start breaking bad! Coup de grâce is the price over half a mil for a teardown. Damn!
🤣
My brain can not comprehend someone paying $1.3 million to live in Salem. Let alone $700k for that shithole.
My goodness.
I cannot stop wondering wtf is going on with the chair half covered in plastic… I would forever have the heebie jeebies if I lived in this house after seeing these pictures…
The owner’s ghost took these pictures
There’s not enough pictures of the trees
Those vines will ruin any exterior when removed. Best not to let it take hold.
It looks like the Blair with
They might just be quite elderly.
Wow. 62 of those pictures. Fascinating.
Wow, I felt like I was falling down the stairs on the next continent over just from flipping through those pictures. Does it come with a warranty and a gyroscope?
Kudzu is evil as hell.
What is happening 😭
I love this statement in the listing!
What the owner loves about this home.
Looks like the White house with its portico, matches the clubhouse at the nearby golf course. Very large, old trees front and backyard. Great neighborhood
How bout tree fidy
Ahhh the old Myers residence 🎃
"Only one neighbor"......."adjoining neighbors all sold for...." Which is it buddy?
"Looks like the White house" LMAO!!!