Hiya

I'm trans currently pre-everything but fully socially transitioned and have been for about 6 years.

As I turned 18 in the past few months I'm in the process of getting HRT via GenderCare as I've managed to save up enough to afford it from part time work.

Yesterday I received an appointment with Dr Lormier in January and I'm obviously ecstatic however I just kinda don't know how to take my parents reaction

I was out when I got the news and when I got back they were supportive(ish) but also made clear that I had to pay for it myself to 'show my commitment'. While I expected to pay for it myself this determination to prove myself felt a bit weird.

Currently based on rough wait-times I will be able to start March/April time, with my exams starting in mid May. However today they have told me that off the back of the appointments I wouldn't be 'allowed' to start HRT until after my exams finish in summer based on the presumption HRT could like ruin my academics????

I was obviously pretty vehemently opposed and they have sorta agreed that they will come to my eventual endocrinologist appt to ask their questions but like do they have any basis for their concerns?

Because obvs HRT is a big change for your body but I'd argue it will only help as from a mental health perspective as everyday I would be moving more towards an appearance that aligns with how I am internally. And it's not like even now hormones are chill and have no impact on school bc at the end of the day I'm a young person.

I guess just any experience of HRT and exam periods/changes would be helpful.

Edit: Added a little extra info/clarity

  • -Hrt doesn't affect your academics -the earlier you get on them the better your results -Gatekeeping medication is wild. Imagine "sorry child, you can't have insulin until you get your grades up"

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  • Best exam results I ever got were a year after starting HRT. Able to concentrate much better. Life generally looking up. Not having to divert 90% of my mental energy to combating disphoria. 

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  • Hrt actually has made me more able to focus and less depressed. If I had done my a levels on T I would've done way better because I would've turned up more than 30% of the time lol. Maybe ask Dr Lorimer if he can give u like a recommendation of going on hrt with exams in mind or something to give to ur parents he's really sweet I'm sure he could try help or something. Good luck tho I hope it works itself out

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  • My girlfriend got a distinction in college in 2024, had GCS in Feb, and is now at the UK's top university for her course, where she's been awarded an Academic Excellence bursary of several thousand pounds.

    If anything, transitioning makes you MORE likely to attain excellence as you're happier and healthier.

    I think the only potential issue (and I can only see this if I squint really hard) might be mood swings from HRT - but that's just the same as all teenagers go through while doing their GCSEs...

    Edit: this is all as adult after transitioning for a few years. Before she transitioned, she failed all her exams and dropped out of college because she was so depressed and suicidal and had a total breakdown.

    TRANS HEALTHCARE SAVES LIVES (and exam grades).

    Fwiw/clarity: I'm not medically transitioning, I sit somewhere in the region of "meh, gender shmender" I don't ID with one and I don't do anything about presentation. So I do struggle with whether I belong here. But I will ALWAYS fight furiously for you all. <3

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  • I did find that my first few months on HRT were a bit of an emotional rollercoaster as they started me out on a low dose and gradually worked up to a long-term one that makes me feel more emotionally stable. Dr Lorimer is lovely though.

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  • I mean, you're 18 and paying for it yourself. They really shouldn't have a say

    For personal reassurance, I felt great for the first few months after starting HRT. I started on Citalopram around the same time and (after the adjustment period) my overall mental health has improved drastically. But yeah, for the first couple of months I was in a sort of honeymoon period of sorts that eventually wore off and I started to feel more normal. I never went back to feeling the low I was in before HRT though

    It won't affect your academics. From my personal perspective, delaying it longer than necessary did mess up my mental health massively which negatively impacted my ability to function and work at the time

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