Although sickening, it isn't surprising. "What do you mean you lost your graciousness to nightmares and then turned him in? How could you be so cruel?!" Defending. Rape.
Lol I've been "living with it" for 15 years. Yes, I've managed to mostly have my life together, study, work, maintain friendships and have relationships but I am still very much affected. I'm not trying to kill myself but that doesn't mean it didn't happen. W*nker.
I'm sorry that happened to you. It's been 18 years for me. I'm from a small town and everyone knows him. Even having moved to a new state I'm terrified to say anything.
I'm so sorry that happened to you too. I still hear about him because we have mutuals. I know he has a daughter now which sickens me. I wish I could say something but it's been so long...
That's exactly what I came here to say. More than 20 years later, I still have trouble getting to sleep because of the flashbacks and there is no point reporting to the police back then because it's his word vs mine and no one will believe me
Sorry you went through that. None of us here deserved it. I wish with all my heart I had reported it back then. I don't have any evidence now or know precise dates and like you said - his word vs mine. I just hope these people get the karma they deserve.
May I ask, have you tried therapy/counselling to deal with the sleep issues?
Oh yes, cuz we're all one hive mind that all feel and act the exact same way! How could we have forgotten that? /s
I was raped when I was 29 years old. I have PTSD, I get nightmares most nights (including tonight, which is why I'm awake at 341am after going to bed at 1am), and guess what? I never reported it. I had my reasons, which probably weren't the best reasons, but they made sense to my tortured brain at the time. Now I wish I had, but it's too late for me. Not everyone reacts to trauma the same way, and it can affect you for the rest of your life. It's been 15 years since I was raped, and I'm still dealing with the effects.
i’m so sorry that you had to go through that, that sounds horrific. i literally don’t know how men can think and say shit like this about sexual assault, it’s so dangerous and idiotic. hope that you’re doing better now
I am, thank you. Except for when I sleep, I don't really have any issues, and even my nightmares aren't about that, they're always pretty stupid in retrospect, but seem bad in my sleep, if that makes sense? I don't really think about it much, unless I read stupid stuff like this or something happens that makes me feel unsafe. I'm luckier than some, I blacked out and don't really remember the event, just before and after. That actually fucked with my head for a while, but now I consider it a blessing.
Idk if it would be of any help to you, but there are strategies to learn how to lucid dream, basically getting you to realize you're in a dream and being able to act consciously instead of being at the mercy of whatever happens
I've heard of lucid dreaming, but I've never really looked into it as something that could help me. Maybe I should look into that. I wouldn't know where to start with all the junk on the internet these days..
I'm not that knowledgeable on it myself, but iirc it involves doing little things while awake, like counting your fingers or intently looking at clocks, so you'll automatically do those things in your dreams as well. If the count of your fingers is off or the clock looks weird you'll know you're in a dream
I'm a clock watcher as it is, because I take timed medicine 4 times a day. But I don't recall seeing clocks in my dreams.. I'll have to try and look for them, though I don't know how I'll have the control to do that. As it is, I frequently dream about having to take my medicine, and it's in a hard to get to area, maybe I can throw in a clock or two. Thanks for the tips!
Maybe she told someone in her close trusted circle or therapist first and it took her a year to build the courage and conviction to go public with the assault. Seriously fuck this guy and everyone who thinks like him.
I was raped and kidnapped over 6 years ago and still suffer nightmares, PTSD and absolute fear of the dark since then.
This guy is dangerous to women who want to come forward, thinking of coming forward or even have come forward.
The mere fact he would tell a survivor these things only because it does not fit his narrative of Rape Victims 101.
What a complete and utter asshat.
When I was 20, I went through an attempted assault. It was someone I had gone on a date with one time. He pined me and wouldn't get off. At some point, I managed to break free and run out to my car and drive away. It was 20 years ago. I never reported it, I never told anyone, and the memory doesn't often resurface unless triggered.
You never forget the trauma that shatters you, and only a few are able to piece together enough of their soul to have the strength to press charges. Some if us have trauma and psychological abuse etched so deeply into our cores that after decades of mastering the mask of " im fine", nobody would ever know
if anyone is able to play devil's advocate w legitimate justifications on y im a "cobra" im open to hearing em. this fella just seemed like he was digging up unnecessary details n couldn't even explain y it wasn't wrong for my ex to have not stopped altho i told him so many times to.
Also, when something traumatic happens, the mind can either blocks it off or tries to rationalize and it can take years to actually accept what happened.
Although sickening, it isn't surprising. "What do you mean you lost your graciousness to nightmares and then turned him in? How could you be so cruel?!" Defending. Rape.
So fucking sad.
Lol I've been "living with it" for 15 years. Yes, I've managed to mostly have my life together, study, work, maintain friendships and have relationships but I am still very much affected. I'm not trying to kill myself but that doesn't mean it didn't happen. W*nker.
I'm sorry that happened to you. It's been 18 years for me. I'm from a small town and everyone knows him. Even having moved to a new state I'm terrified to say anything.
I'm so sorry that happened to you too. I still hear about him because we have mutuals. I know he has a daughter now which sickens me. I wish I could say something but it's been so long...
That's exactly what I came here to say. More than 20 years later, I still have trouble getting to sleep because of the flashbacks and there is no point reporting to the police back then because it's his word vs mine and no one will believe me
Sorry you went through that. None of us here deserved it. I wish with all my heart I had reported it back then. I don't have any evidence now or know precise dates and like you said - his word vs mine. I just hope these people get the karma they deserve.
May I ask, have you tried therapy/counselling to deal with the sleep issues?
Holy shit that is disgusting
Jesus fucking christ. I dont even comprehend what he was saying but I don't want to even. Sounds almost sociopathic or some shit.
Drop the almost.
He can probably tell if someone's been raped because he's the rapist
Bro’s just telling on himself in every possible way
Yeah, I doubt a single rape victim has ever felt comfortable being around this guy.
I doubt anyone full stop has ever felt comfortable being around him lol
Oh yes, cuz we're all one hive mind that all feel and act the exact same way! How could we have forgotten that? /s
I was raped when I was 29 years old. I have PTSD, I get nightmares most nights (including tonight, which is why I'm awake at 341am after going to bed at 1am), and guess what? I never reported it. I had my reasons, which probably weren't the best reasons, but they made sense to my tortured brain at the time. Now I wish I had, but it's too late for me. Not everyone reacts to trauma the same way, and it can affect you for the rest of your life. It's been 15 years since I was raped, and I'm still dealing with the effects.
i’m so sorry that you had to go through that, that sounds horrific. i literally don’t know how men can think and say shit like this about sexual assault, it’s so dangerous and idiotic. hope that you’re doing better now
I am, thank you. Except for when I sleep, I don't really have any issues, and even my nightmares aren't about that, they're always pretty stupid in retrospect, but seem bad in my sleep, if that makes sense? I don't really think about it much, unless I read stupid stuff like this or something happens that makes me feel unsafe. I'm luckier than some, I blacked out and don't really remember the event, just before and after. That actually fucked with my head for a while, but now I consider it a blessing.
Idk if it would be of any help to you, but there are strategies to learn how to lucid dream, basically getting you to realize you're in a dream and being able to act consciously instead of being at the mercy of whatever happens
I've heard of lucid dreaming, but I've never really looked into it as something that could help me. Maybe I should look into that. I wouldn't know where to start with all the junk on the internet these days..
I'm not that knowledgeable on it myself, but iirc it involves doing little things while awake, like counting your fingers or intently looking at clocks, so you'll automatically do those things in your dreams as well. If the count of your fingers is off or the clock looks weird you'll know you're in a dream
I'm a clock watcher as it is, because I take timed medicine 4 times a day. But I don't recall seeing clocks in my dreams.. I'll have to try and look for them, though I don't know how I'll have the control to do that. As it is, I frequently dream about having to take my medicine, and it's in a hard to get to area, maybe I can throw in a clock or two. Thanks for the tips!
He sounds really rapey to me.
I cant believe that all victims of rape react the exact same way at the exact same time! /s
Hope this guy swags himself lol
Absolutely vile
Someone needs to search that man’s house, property, basement, and computer.
I wanna Luigi this guy.
Maybe she told someone in her close trusted circle or therapist first and it took her a year to build the courage and conviction to go public with the assault. Seriously fuck this guy and everyone who thinks like him.
I was raped and kidnapped over 6 years ago and still suffer nightmares, PTSD and absolute fear of the dark since then. This guy is dangerous to women who want to come forward, thinking of coming forward or even have come forward. The mere fact he would tell a survivor these things only because it does not fit his narrative of Rape Victims 101. What a complete and utter asshat.
"She was ok with it for 1 year". A very hearty fuck you to that guy. I guarantee she was not.
Disgusting. Idiot.
Cobra Commander kick his ass, please.
Dude is the perfect example of main character syndrome combined with the uncontrollable urge to mansplain RAPE TO ACTUAL GODDAMN RAPE VICTIMS.
Seriously, what is wrong with that guy?
Forward a screenshot to the former victims he lived with, bet they cut him off
When I was 20, I went through an attempted assault. It was someone I had gone on a date with one time. He pined me and wouldn't get off. At some point, I managed to break free and run out to my car and drive away. It was 20 years ago. I never reported it, I never told anyone, and the memory doesn't often resurface unless triggered.
You never forget the trauma that shatters you, and only a few are able to piece together enough of their soul to have the strength to press charges. Some if us have trauma and psychological abuse etched so deeply into our cores that after decades of mastering the mask of " im fine", nobody would ever know
My favorite part is where he goes on about how rape victims often try to hide what happened to them.
Hiding it? You mean like, idk, not reporting it for a year?
i am the op.
if anyone is able to play devil's advocate w legitimate justifications on y im a "cobra" im open to hearing em. this fella just seemed like he was digging up unnecessary details n couldn't even explain y it wasn't wrong for my ex to have not stopped altho i told him so many times to.
thank u for supporting me, it means a lot
I'm not great at reading people, but I think someone has to check this fuckers house and hard drive. This is disgusting as hell.
Also, when something traumatic happens, the mind can either blocks it off or tries to rationalize and it can take years to actually accept what happened.