I remember as a teenager thinking, gosh, I sure am better than everyone (which I am unironically). I can’t wait for everyone like this to grow up and we’ll all just be, you know, people. But they don’t grow up, and I, regrettably, am still better than most people.
To be clear I’m not bragging — it sucks. It sucks that I’m smarter, more thoughtful, kinder, etc than most people. Has the average person read a book for pleasure? Is it a real book? What about creative hobbies — do they create for pleasure? Do they learn for the sake of learning?
Becoming an adult is cultivating your garden, realizing cultivation is very optional, and that most people will opt out of anything they don’t absolutely have to do.
Anyways most of these people grow up to be nurses and just totally vapid people. And to be clear none of this is a smarts thing — it’s a character thing. Most people have bad character.
It’s not rage bait to think you’re better than meat eaters, breeders, pet owners, Joe Rogan listeners, gamers, etc.
Like I’m passing such a low bar. It’s such a low bar. Most people do not learn widely/deeply for pleasure. Most people will never write a song, or a story, etc for the joy of it. Most people do not have a real internal life.
I’m sorry that my moral superiority makes you uncomfortable. I mean, I’m not, I feel like that discomfort is a sign you need to be better. So in a sense you’re welcome. But I am sorry that suffering is necessarily attached to your growth.
Please be better. This is not a joke. I am not irony poisoned or online in the way that you are. It breaks my heart that you will always be what you are. Granted, that heart break is more for me than you. But, still.
nah, those are black Forces not no cheap work shoes, in the states they got their own reputation of being the official shoe for every walking crashout statewide. if you get into some shit with someone and they pull up in a clapped out 2000s buick regal/lacross, no tags or registration, creased forces, and they got a nicknane thats just one word repeated twice like JonJon Or ManMan, just go ahead and call the laws, make sure to request the white cops esp, cus no matter how this fight goes, that glock 26 tucked in his drawls preach the word of the UnHoly Gospel of Lucifer in his ear only way your making it home is in a jar on your mamas centerpeice no bs
Hm were they already doing spray tans then? Like I know the technology existed, I just don’t remember seeing it as a common theme in the admittedly limited amount of British youth media I’ve seen from that period.
As a teenage girl 20 years ago, I can confirm we were at least doing spray tans in the US. Mystic Tan machines were big at a lot of local tanning salons, or you could go the old fashioned bottle route.
To be fair Longchamp bags are timeless. They're overpriced but they are nice basic tote bags that last forever. My mom gave me one like 15 years ago and it's still in great shape!
I think we have a version of this girl in the US too. she just wears less fake tan. messy bun on top of her head, puffer jacket. always sort of at odds with the teacher. always becomes a nurse
In my part of Canada, they don't have the grades to become a nurse, so they become a personal support worker and call themselves a nurse. Not that all PSWs are like them though.
Will bully anyone regardless of age/gender/social-standing then pull the "bad home life" card when confronted by any authority which somehow makes it all okay.
Comes back every new school year with a new surname because her new step-dad bought her something expensive.
Grows up to be a nurse, care worker, or some kind of receptionist/admin in healthcare, is still a bully and thinks working healthcare makes her a saint.
Likes to drive around with her boyfriend, whom she has known for two weeks, in a “serious” way (he was a friend of her former boyfriend, whom they don’t see anymore because “he is a fucking twat,” in their opinion). However, they exchanged nudes while she was still with the first one.
He drives around in an old trash car with the most over-the-top speakers ever built into it, three-month-old beer cans, energy drinks, and McDonald’s paper on the floor.
They drive around at 120 kph on country roads until the boyfriend gets arrested and loses his driver’s license. Then off she goes to another guy in the original ex-boyfriend’s friend circle.
The car in fact is either an out of date Vauxhall Corsa or Ford Fiesta that is used to take said 14 year old british girl from secondary school to McDonald's while the boyfriend, who's somehow 4 years older than her, blasts the shittiest drill music on his car's built-in speakers
This was painfully accurate when I was in secondary school like 30 years ago, save for the drill music.
Nobody was bothered that a few 14-15 year old girls were getting picked up almost daily by older lads in cars (who were usually aged between about 18 and 22).
You just wrote the entire extended universe. The 2-week 'serious' boyfriend, the dodgy car, the 120kph country road laps, then the quick swap to another guy in the same circle. Painfully accurate starter pack lore.
that account i replied to was made only 2 days ago and has one comment which is very chatgpt-like in writing, the other one i called out for being a bot is similarly young with only a few comments that sound very gpt-like - you can pretty much test this by asking chatgpt to write something quirky and funny for a reddit comment and it will spit out things very close to those responses
For real, you mapped the whole teen soap arc: new "serious" boyfriend, dodgy car, loud speakers, then the reset to another guy in the same friend group. This is the kind of detail that makes these threads gold.
The first one who gets excommunicated in favor of the degenerate. It’s good though, time has passed (obviously) last I checked the guy was homeless and addicted while the ex was a manic medicated mess in her 7th year of undergrad working as a bartender in a shady bar to pay for her coke habit. I’d say I made it out safe! But the sex good while it lasted. No regrets here. Fuck the both of them LMAO
Know so many folk who were bullys in school who complain about their own kid getting bullied now. Well guess you know how powerles the parents of the kids you bullied in school feel now.
I saw one of the girls that was a big mean bully with her kid the other day. I felt bad for thinking that for a second cos the poor kid hasn't done anything. She might have even changed. But I still remember how horrible she was back then.
Oh sweet summer child 🥲 this orange foundation thing has been a thing in the uk and some parts of northern europe for 2 decades, id honestly call it a legit subculture by now
Yeah i remember this first starting to become a thing with the older girls when i was in elementary, around 2003 😂 the fake tan/orange foundation, either bleach blond or dyed black hair, thick circular eyeliner, like 5 layers of mascara, spaghetti tank tops and juicy sweats.. i can smell the victorias secret body mist just thinking about it lmao
I remember being simultaneously proud and embarrassed about being Northern when one year, around high-school prom season, it was in the news that there was a fake-tan shortage in Liverpool.
It’s a make up trend right now I think. But where I live it’s not even just teenagers but women in their 20s doing it. And many are typically naturally pale, so it looks really bad.
It's a bit of an outdated trend tbh, peaked in the 2000s (at least in the US). People still do it but, less, and it's increasingly old conservatives who do it rather than trendy young people
Longchamp bags are legit decent though. My mom gave me one like 15 years ago and it is still in perfect condition after much use. They're definitely one of those conspicuous consumption things but they actually are good quality. And they're roomy enough to hold all your stuff!
This doesn't stop at 14 for that majority of them. This could be labeled "Passive Aggressive 22 year old British Girl Starter Pack" and still be accurate
Genuinely only thing that updated from when I was at school 10+ ago is the bag and now an off brand Stanley lol before that it was Paul’s boutique bag and some VS body sprays that would choke out the whole class
OP, are you from/near Essex by any chance? I always thought this type of girl was an Essex exclusive, originating from the “TOWIE” days. Maybe it’s more common nationwide than I thought?
No Idea, but it looks absolutely horrible. The world collectively decided in the early 2000s that white sweat socks are the pinnacle of fashion crimes, and then the world seemed to just suddenly forget about that insight.
Sorry to hear it. Try getting into a hobby and meeting women socially. Once you come out of your shell and learn how to hold a conversation, you might well meet somebody nice who likes you 😉
The white socks over yoga pants is the most contrived and sad fashion trend. Lots of people follow trends but this one is the most blatantly obvious one that has no natural entry point.
And a word of warning, I always check out your socks and shoes and silently judge you when you mismatch. Yeah I see you Nike socks girl in your cheap Reeboks.
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Nice to know they've barely changed in the last 15 years
I was thinking exactly this lmao
Yeah, this is one of those posts where you instantly picture someone you’ve actually met.
I remember as a teenager thinking, gosh, I sure am better than everyone (which I am unironically). I can’t wait for everyone like this to grow up and we’ll all just be, you know, people. But they don’t grow up, and I, regrettably, am still better than most people.
To be clear I’m not bragging — it sucks. It sucks that I’m smarter, more thoughtful, kinder, etc than most people. Has the average person read a book for pleasure? Is it a real book? What about creative hobbies — do they create for pleasure? Do they learn for the sake of learning?
Becoming an adult is cultivating your garden, realizing cultivation is very optional, and that most people will opt out of anything they don’t absolutely have to do.
Anyways most of these people grow up to be nurses and just totally vapid people. And to be clear none of this is a smarts thing — it’s a character thing. Most people have bad character.
This is not a bit I unironically think this.
2/10 rage bait
It’s not rage bait to think you’re better than meat eaters, breeders, pet owners, Joe Rogan listeners, gamers, etc.
Like I’m passing such a low bar. It’s such a low bar. Most people do not learn widely/deeply for pleasure. Most people will never write a song, or a story, etc for the joy of it. Most people do not have a real internal life.
now you're not even trying bro, give it up -1/10 rage bait
I’m sorry that my moral superiority makes you uncomfortable. I mean, I’m not, I feel like that discomfort is a sign you need to be better. So in a sense you’re welcome. But I am sorry that suffering is necessarily attached to your growth.
Please be better. This is not a joke. I am not irony poisoned or online in the way that you are. It breaks my heart that you will always be what you are. Granted, that heart break is more for me than you. But, still.
Actually this was kinda funny to read, please go on I wonder how well you can cook. Tell me more about me Mr reddit psychologist.
What's a fake book?
10/10 ragebait
"Oi!"
More like 20-25 years, that was the footwear worn by all the mean girls back in my high school days.
The kind of shoes you're told to buy before working at a fast food place.
nah, those are black Forces not no cheap work shoes, in the states they got their own reputation of being the official shoe for every walking crashout statewide. if you get into some shit with someone and they pull up in a clapped out 2000s buick regal/lacross, no tags or registration, creased forces, and they got a nicknane thats just one word repeated twice like JonJon Or ManMan, just go ahead and call the laws, make sure to request the white cops esp, cus no matter how this fight goes, that glock 26 tucked in his drawls preach the word of the UnHoly Gospel of Lucifer in his ear only way your making it home is in a jar on your mamas centerpeice no bs
[ Removed by Reddit ]
Hm were they already doing spray tans then? Like I know the technology existed, I just don’t remember seeing it as a common theme in the admittedly limited amount of British youth media I’ve seen from that period.
As a teenage girl 20 years ago, I can confirm we were at least doing spray tans in the US. Mystic Tan machines were big at a lot of local tanning salons, or you could go the old fashioned bottle route.
To be fair Longchamp bags are timeless. They're overpriced but they are nice basic tote bags that last forever. My mom gave me one like 15 years ago and it's still in great shape!
[deleted]
I use Nalgenes, I'm old lol.
Glad to know that it also barely changes across the pond lol
my first thought was “leggins are still a thing?”
Where is the vape and the fake lashes.
Also lip filler, if her parents are horrible.
The girls at my school didn't do that as far as I know lolol, they probably did tho 😂
I’m not from the UK, but I know a few friends of my sister with the same vibe who got their parents’ admission to get fillers at 16.
And the bleached blonde hair
And the fake nails?
It’s always long ones in red
Not white?
I’ve seen more in red though, but yeah white is still common, or as they call it “Funny Bunny”
I think we have a version of this girl in the US too. she just wears less fake tan. messy bun on top of her head, puffer jacket. always sort of at odds with the teacher. always becomes a nurse
you can't forget the Cookie Monster PJ pants
Cookie Monster Pajama Girl and North Face Puffer Jacket Girl are different socioeconomically but have the same trauma and stapdad name situation.
Maybe with Ugg boots.
But fake ones that are falling apart so she’s walking on the sides more than the soles
Cookie monster PJ pants with falling apart fake ugg's aren't the ones wearing puffers tho; they're more the style to be wearing snowboard jackets
So the hot cheeto girls then?
The flaming hot Cheetos have been dethroned by Takis for the current generation of high schoolers. Extra points for the blue ones.
They're always loudly arguing with the teacher and either gets kicked out of the classroom or leaves themselves
In my part of Canada, they don't have the grades to become a nurse, so they become a personal support worker and call themselves a nurse. Not that all PSWs are like them though.
In Finland too, the bag, water bottle, shoes, leggings and foundation all match most of the girls in my "highschool".
Kinda sad actually, no individuality xd
Will bully anyone regardless of age/gender/social-standing then pull the "bad home life" card when confronted by any authority which somehow makes it all okay.
Comes back every new school year with a new surname because her new step-dad bought her something expensive.
Grows up to be a nurse, care worker, or some kind of receptionist/admin in healthcare, is still a bully and thinks working healthcare makes her a saint.
Likes to drive around with her boyfriend, whom she has known for two weeks, in a “serious” way (he was a friend of her former boyfriend, whom they don’t see anymore because “he is a fucking twat,” in their opinion). However, they exchanged nudes while she was still with the first one.
He drives around in an old trash car with the most over-the-top speakers ever built into it, three-month-old beer cans, energy drinks, and McDonald’s paper on the floor.
They drive around at 120 kph on country roads until the boyfriend gets arrested and loses his driver’s license. Then off she goes to another guy in the original ex-boyfriend’s friend circle.
Is always a ford fiesta, vauxhall corsa or Volkswagen golf
The car in fact is either an out of date Vauxhall Corsa or Ford Fiesta that is used to take said 14 year old british girl from secondary school to McDonald's while the boyfriend, who's somehow 4 years older than her, blasts the shittiest drill music on his car's built-in speakers
This was painfully accurate when I was in secondary school like 30 years ago, save for the drill music.
Nobody was bothered that a few 14-15 year old girls were getting picked up almost daily by older lads in cars (who were usually aged between about 18 and 22).
You just wrote the entire extended universe. The 2-week 'serious' boyfriend, the dodgy car, the 120kph country road laps, then the quick swap to another guy in the same circle. Painfully accurate starter pack lore.
this account seems like a bot as well
How do you know? Not doubting you, just curious. Ta!
that account i replied to was made only 2 days ago and has one comment which is very chatgpt-like in writing, the other one i called out for being a bot is similarly young with only a few comments that sound very gpt-like - you can pretty much test this by asking chatgpt to write something quirky and funny for a reddit comment and it will spit out things very close to those responses
Give it a year and we can't tell anymore
Sorry i know to much.
For real, you mapped the whole teen soap arc: new "serious" boyfriend, dodgy car, loud speakers, then the reset to another guy in the same friend group. This is the kind of detail that makes these threads gold.
this account seems like a bot
You just described my ex gf perfectly, down to the letter. Wtf.
who? are you the first boyfriend or the rest?
The first one who gets excommunicated in favor of the degenerate. It’s good though, time has passed (obviously) last I checked the guy was homeless and addicted while the ex was a manic medicated mess in her 7th year of undergrad working as a bartender in a shady bar to pay for her coke habit. I’d say I made it out safe! But the sex good while it lasted. No regrets here. Fuck the both of them LMAO
Bonus if they avoid the 120kph crash off the road that either leaves her in a coma or kills her…
This is so stupidly accurate it’s mental
Omg yesss 😂
omigod shit upppp
I highly recommend shitting down to avoid unwanted messes
lol didn't even notice that but I'm leaving it. autocorrect knows me too well
Strong play. Respect.
Unless you're standing on a really powerful fan
It’s interesting you bring that up because my second rule of shitting is not to do it near any sort of powerful machinery
what's your third rule of shitting?
No magnetic objects nearby?
The "new surname every school year" bit is so specific it hurts 😬
* key worker innit
Know so many folk who were bullys in school who complain about their own kid getting bullied now. Well guess you know how powerles the parents of the kids you bullied in school feel now.
I saw one of the girls that was a big mean bully with her kid the other day. I felt bad for thinking that for a second cos the poor kid hasn't done anything. She might have even changed. But I still remember how horrible she was back then.
Equal opportunity bullying /s
Perfectly described the dentists receptionist that I went to school with
The accuracy
Just plain aggressive in my experience.
"HAVE YOU GOT A PROBLEM???"
"Its Fukin Minging"
Alternatively: "That's peng."
That reminded me of that vid with the girl giving out about a Calypso and it put a big grin on my face
Can someone translate?
means disgusting
Aye thanks mate this bri'ish language thing hurts to listen to innit
"Minging" basically means disgusting or foul.
I forgot to add that they never have a pencil case, they just pull some pens out of their bag and if they don't have any they will "borrow" yours 😂.
I have lost so many pens this way.
I leant the hard way about not being one of the only people to have my pencil case in woodwork.
They don't pronounce the "t" in "shut up." It would be "Omigod shuh upppp"
That is a nice bag, though.
If anything it was one continuous drawl, "omigod, shu-uhhhhp"
bowouhwaer
Yes except aggressive not passive aggressive 😂
haha true, in my experience they were a mix of both lol
Whats with the foundation thing? Its like Trumpian style orange
Oh sweet summer child 🥲 this orange foundation thing has been a thing in the uk and some parts of northern europe for 2 decades, id honestly call it a legit subculture by now
I was honestly going to say there's no way it's two decades old, because I remember it getting popular when I was at school so it can't be that old.
Then I remembered my own age and yeah, two decades is probably about right.
I’m 40, the foundation thing was definitely around when I was in high school 😅
Yeah i remember this first starting to become a thing with the older girls when i was in elementary, around 2003 😂 the fake tan/orange foundation, either bleach blond or dyed black hair, thick circular eyeliner, like 5 layers of mascara, spaghetti tank tops and juicy sweats.. i can smell the victorias secret body mist just thinking about it lmao
I remember falling deep into grime around 2013, ive seen the horrors
Hahaha I love the idea of trump seeing these girls and the lighbulb goes off.. Heinous orange! Of course!!
I remember being simultaneously proud and embarrassed about being Northern when one year, around high-school prom season, it was in the news that there was a fake-tan shortage in Liverpool.
What a climate with no sun all year does to a mf
Trump was inspired by 14 year old girls.
So much that he raped them.
It’s a make up trend right now I think. But where I live it’s not even just teenagers but women in their 20s doing it. And many are typically naturally pale, so it looks really bad.
Kind of reminds me of the Japanese gyary style makeup, but not as extreme. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gyaru
It's a bit of an outdated trend tbh, peaked in the 2000s (at least in the US). People still do it but, less, and it's increasingly old conservatives who do it rather than trendy young people
Ugh, that ol sweet thought that using a foundation a lil darker makes you look tan. And then they go extreme with it.
Look how tan I am!
https://preview.redd.it/90u6li50er8g1.png?width=1440&format=png&auto=webp&s=a303b1f1ab0e31939239853d4edc7337a7dfd9ba
Cheap foundation can oxidise into orange. That with too much bronzer and self tan can form a lethal combo.
In England it’s particularly a thing among girls from the travelling community. Can spot them a mile off.
Isn’t funny that everyone associates anything orange to Trump?
Dude have you seen these girls? Comparing orange makeup to orange makeup is like comparing a red plane to a red plane
Screams at you for being "UNFAIR" when you don't let her vape indoors.
In my opinion, the most insufferable person you'll ever meet in school in the UK
Group of people, they tend to hunt in packs
Its always that bag, at least that design of bag
There was only a handful of girls in my year that had a backpack, that (if I could recall) could count them in my fingers
If they have a backpack, it's usually some kind of impractically small, designer bag.
That too
Longchamp bags are legit decent though. My mom gave me one like 15 years ago and it is still in perfect condition after much use. They're definitely one of those conspicuous consumption things but they actually are good quality. And they're roomy enough to hold all your stuff!
Is this like a UK hot cheeto girl?
Basically
Those shoes are hideous💀
Food service shoes
Black af1s are just drug dealer shoes
They were considered peak fashion at my comp
Nah they look normal.
I mean what's your reference for "good looking shoes" then?
I bet you're wearing them rn
Dude I'm not a girl
Nor british
https://preview.redd.it/joik7yyg8s8g1.jpeg?width=1161&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e27728c5ca84b956cb578805ccf9571e19d1118d
So the orange foundation is still a thing?
yup 😂
Eyelashes like tarantula
Is the black sneaker thing accurate? I find that style so effin ugly, I can’t imagine teen girls wearing that
They’re what most people wear for secondary school, mainly because the schools demand “all black leather”.
They actually look alright when paired with translucent black tights and a short skirt.
In my day it was a knee length skirt that had been rolled over at the waste to make it shorter
Oh yeah I can see that it would work with tights and a skirt actually
Yes
Stuff like this is why I love this sub. I would never have known people like this existed.
Vicki pollard?
Probably more like Lauren Cooper from the Catherine Tate Show.
This doesn't stop at 14 for that majority of them. This could be labeled "Passive Aggressive 22 year old British Girl Starter Pack" and still be accurate
I feel like this is exclusive to UK and Ireland.
Do you have any idea how little that narrows it down?
I like how niche this is.
It is something everyone who went to a UK high school knows of
I'm American and I enjoy these little glimpses into another culture. Mini anthropology.
it comes from a lot of personal experience lol
The American ones are exactly the same minus the "oi"
Millie B ur such a slaaaag
This is one of the most general yet specific starter packs i've ever seen
Her name? Imogen
I remember they were always called Georgia or Layla or something similar
Sophie is another one
Pillars of British society
"Oi!" Lol
Keeley
Trashy British girls I can’t 😂😂
This is incredibly like the girls from 2006 at school
The more things change, the more they stay the same I guess
Genuinely only thing that updated from when I was at school 10+ ago is the bag and now an off brand Stanley lol before that it was Paul’s boutique bag and some VS body sprays that would choke out the whole class
No pls and they will always be chewing something and keeps skipping lessons, walking around with ted baker bags.
Also they always have these long eyelashes like spider legs, and swollen lip fillers
Also lip fillers
That Simple Modern 40oz cup beats the Stanley all day
I have this exact one in this exact color and it is the best ever.
All black AF1’s? That’s gangster.
They’re practically the required shoes at most British schools.
OP, are you from/near Essex by any chance? I always thought this type of girl was an Essex exclusive, originating from the “TOWIE” days. Maybe it’s more common nationwide than I thought?
not from Essex but I am from East Anglia lol
Close enough I suppose? I wonder if it’s all the same up north or if they’ve got their own stereotypical “popular girl” tropes lol
What’s the appeal of those shoes they look like the black shoes fast food employees wear
Where are the oversized curl lashes and silky long straight hair
should add to the starter pack that her close relative lives with tv constantly on on the living room and never work a day in their life
British woman of any age wears orange foundation
M to the B
Forgot the vape
What’s up with the leggings and the white socks over them?
No Idea, but it looks absolutely horrible. The world collectively decided in the early 2000s that white sweat socks are the pinnacle of fashion crimes, and then the world seemed to just suddenly forget about that insight.
Black AF1s? Lol
I didn't know black airforce one's were a chav icon...
Do the black Air Force’s actually fit here or what?
”Bloody”
What’s with that bag? I see so many women who have it
British zanza
So, like those girls Jay and Neil passed by on the way to Will's 17th?
She’s trying to read about things that bounce and jump IT’S GOING SO WELL aggressively tapping
I have an off brand stanley cup of the same color. But I'm almost 40, male, prior USMC. Lol
I don't think OP knows what passive agressive means
I’m an incel
Sorry to hear it. Try getting into a hobby and meeting women socially. Once you come out of your shell and learn how to hold a conversation, you might well meet somebody nice who likes you 😉
I have a girlfriend, but thank you
cool!
Sorry why are we picking on children?
The white socks over yoga pants is the most contrived and sad fashion trend. Lots of people follow trends but this one is the most blatantly obvious one that has no natural entry point.
And a word of warning, I always check out your socks and shoes and silently judge you when you mismatch. Yeah I see you Nike socks girl in your cheap Reeboks.
what is a natural entry point for fashion?