Cried, put beef jerky in applesauce, cried again because it didn't taste like I wanted it to. I'm not even pegrant
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  • 481 points Larthology

    Maybe you are pregante?

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    141 points weirdoldhobo1978

    Is OP pergagnet?

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    66 points Tango91

    But how is babby formed?

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    4 points Doglover4561

    Will it hurt baby top of his head?

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    46 points canolafly

    Nope, just a case of the gregnants. It's not as long as 9 months.

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    21 points Number1GoblinHater

    That seems a little on the shorter side for a pragnet.

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    19 points canolafly

    Well, you don't want babby to get large enough to get a head dent.

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    10 points Donny_Do_Nothing

    Sounds dangerops.

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    11 points Ewenthel

    Maybe she’s pregananant?

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    7 points ShoulderSea8008

    But can they down 10 foot water slide gregnant?

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    2 points Technical_Inaji

    How is babby formed?

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  • 155 points momalloyd

    Don't worry, we all feel a little pegrant sometimes.

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    12 points Alewort

    I feel a little pegrant right now, time for a snack.

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  • 73 points wowpepap

    is there r/shittydayfood ? this sounds like one of them. stay strong opp

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    48 points scheherazade0125

    There's r/depressionmeals and its quirky cousin r/kitchencels

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    39 points Peeinyourcompost

    "Quirky"

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    6 points weirdoldhobo1978

    You know, quirky in that antisocial personality disorder way.

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    10 points paradeoxy1

    Glad OP isn't pregnant because this feels more like /r/drunkencookery

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    5 points traumaqueen1128

    You misread; OP isn't pegrant, so they may actually be pregnant

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  • 42 points mambotomato

    How DID you want it to taste?

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    15 points BeGayDoThoughtcrime

    meat fruit salt

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    2 points Jarrettd11

    I go for more acidic fruits for tough meat.

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  • 241 points TuvixWillNotBeMissed

    I can make you pregnant. Unless you're a woman. In which case I'm not interested. This still looks terrible though, good job.

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    103 points MuchBetterThankYou

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    19 points slo125

    What the fuck

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  • 24 points johnconwell245

    I cried you crude we all crode

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  • 37 points icouldbeeatingoreos

    Have you checked?

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    22 points BeGayDoThoughtcrime

    how

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    72 points oniiichanUwU

    Use a flashlight and a mirror

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    13 points THEdopealope

    I recommend knocking first. 

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    3 points nothisistheotherguy

    Oh wait there’s the baby, he was like real deep in there 

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    13 points Aggravating_Drink817

    I'm so curious because with this not being a pregnancy craving: how exactly were you expecting it to taste?

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    2 points BeGayDoThoughtcrime

    I wanted bacon in applesauce but thought jerky would be an acceptable substitute. Unfortunately it was a bit old and teriyaki flavored which is normally nice but not ideal with applesauce. Oh well live and learn

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  • 12 points kimmyxrose

    i’m pregnant and I wouldn’t eat that 🥴

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  • 10 points Sufficient_Princess

    I am pregnant and now wanna try this

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    3 points ScatteredSignal

    Fry some porkchops and get some applesauce. Be normal please.

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    1 points Sufficient_Princess

    I’m pregnant. I’ll do as I desire. Also fried pork chop and applesauce ain’t as good as fried chicken applesauce

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    2 points ScatteredSignal

    Blasphemy! Though, I respect your appetite.

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  • 6 points GreyGanado

    Pork and chicken are the meats most suited for apple sauce.

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  • 5 points lil-privacy-please

    "Not even pegrant" is my favorite spelling of 2025

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    10 points canolafly

    But pregante has such flair! Like an Italian pregnancy!

    If you haven't seen this classic

    If you have please feel free to enjoy it again. I can't get enough of it

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    3 points bittercripple6969

    If a women has starch masks on her body...

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  • 3 points Sarcastrophe827

    Pegrant is not to be confused with PEGnant. Which has something to do with pegging. So I’ve been told.

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    2 points ScatteredSignal

    Take this info and put it back in your drawer.

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  • 3 points Weavercat

    Bacon and applesauce is what you're looking for.

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    4 points canolafly

    I wasn't looking for it myself, but goddamn am I now! A proper pregante pairing.

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    1 points Weavercat

    Even better with apple butter.

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    3 points BeGayDoThoughtcrime

    exactly, but it was night and i didnt have time to make bacon ): 

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    2 points Weavercat

    Ah. May I suggest emergency bacon that's precooked then?

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  • 3 points odiin1731

    How exactly did you want beef jerky and applesauce to taste?

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  • 2 points Bonegirl06

    Is that mammoth jerky?

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  • 2 points ChaseballBat

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  • 2 points Bismarck_MWKJSR

    Could try blending/food processing the jerkey into powder then mixing it into the applesauce.

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  • 2 points Old_Location_7036

    how do you even come up with an idea such as this 😭🙏

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    2 points BeGayDoThoughtcrime

    Parkour is finding the fastest path from point A to point B. Point B is satisfying my desire to eat meat and fruit with salt. Point A is having not cooked or bought food. I sacrificed quality for efficiency and ended up with neither (||v__v)

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  • 2 points Regular_Journalist44

    Praying for you

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  • 1 points Fixfishing

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  • 1 points Mohtarefnadafa

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  • 1 points Chiluzzar

    Try oekmican might be what youre looking for

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    1 points BeGayDoThoughtcrime

    cant find results for it. did you mean pemmican?

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    1 points Chiluzzar

    https://www.plantoeat.com/blog/2011/06/pemmican/

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  • 1 points 22firefly

    Checks OP's name. This is a bad idea. Something that you may have been thinking is like that of pemican, which is like an ancient energy bar. Something that may be better with beef jerky would be to chop it finely and mix it with fruits such as cherries, plums, dates (carriers a bitter note) and mixed with nuts if you like. If you really like apples add a little bit as the tartness of the apples could help carry some of the other flavors. Now if you want to get really gay about it add some champagne to the mix and you have alcoholic fruity nutty meat and with your name it may be what you want.

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  • 1 points SuaveularSpuddite

    I feel like you're chasing the idea of an applewood smoked beef jerky. I appreciate the effort, it's more than I would have done 😅

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  • 1 points Salohacin

    Would being pregnant really be an improvement on the situation?

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  • 1 points ExampleEffective7088

    Is jorky appelsause fewd for pergonots?

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  • -1 points [deleted]

    [deleted]

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    3 points nerdtasticg

    I don't think she's having a good day.....

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