Grampa

Hey. I want you to know that I'm sorry.

I spent a part of 3 days with you while you were in hospice care. I knew you were going to die. You knew you were going to die. I knew I wouldn't get another chance to talk to you on earth. You asked me about my life. You asked me when I was getting married. You asked me about my job. You thanked me for all the times I helped you with computers and on the farm. You thanked me for spending time with you. You said that you really appreciated it, and knowing you, I'm sure you truly did.

What I didn't tell you, or, couldn't tell you, was just how much I appreciated having you in my life.

I appreciated your work ethic, whether it was plowing the fields just shy of 91 years old, building a camp for your family, wiring pretty much every building in the area, or fixing anything that needed fixing.

I appreciated your marriage and the example you gave, whether through the patience and devotion you've shown in times where Grammie's health was failing, your love and the commitment you had for Grammie and God in your general life, or your practicing saying "I love you" when you could hardly speak, on your way to seeing your wife.

I appreciated your humor. I don't think I ever spent more than an hour with you where I didn't hear at least one joke. Always dry, trying to make people happy.

I appreciated your desire to help others and teach, often through your lessons and "suggestions," but also your teaching me how to parallel park and taking me to my drivers test, your driving a stranger (to you) 3 hours to camp so we would have a friend to play with, your many random facts about gourds, pumpkins, or pretty much anything garden related, your praying for every child, grandchild, great grandchild and many family friends by name daily, and many more.

I appreciated your love of God. Your preaching well past retirement, singing hymns, your evangelizing at every opportunity given, and your steadfastness even in the face of death.

I appreciated getting to know you and your stories about your life. I appreciated the card you mailed to me full of thanks and care when I fixed your computer. I appreciated the family you helped create. I appreciated your patience when you wanted me to work in the fields. I appreciated your creative solutions and square pumpkins, I appreciated your wonderful example of a man and servant of God. I appreciated you.

I wasn't able to tell you any of that while on Earth, and I'm sorry.

What I did tell you was that I loved you. I just hope you understood how much.

Until we meet again

Your grandson