(Sorry for the broken English) My boyfriend and I have been together from almost four years now.
He has a girl best friend and they know eachother from like 5th grade. They both liked eachother but never got to be together because he liked her first for a while and then moved on (with other girls and then me), and then she liked him.
When we started dating she had a boyfriend but apparently still got upset at the fact that we were together. He gave her a ride (she’s closer to his house) and when he got to my house she didn’t really switch to the back seat (or offered to), she went on the front seat alongside him the whole time until we got there.
She didn’t really talk to me at all, even when I was trying to pick up conversation with her in the car ride to the friend’s party (it was the first time we met, as my boyfriend and were I starting to date). I met certain people that day that I’ve been “friends” with since that moment but she chose to seat from like a 8 feet distance in between us and didn’t engage in conversation with our side of the table.
Then, he had a fight with her that time about that, that he moved on so (as she supposedly did) but she didn’t act like she did. He also told me like their morals didn’t align anymore but now they seem to be doing OK.
She had other attitudes with me (like the other 3 times we saw eachother, because their friend group is no longer in contact with her, just my bf) but I don’t see her anymore.
She -up until this day- hasn’t even tried to get to know me, and to me that’s kind of sus because why wouldn’t you want to be close with your best friend’s girlfriend? That’s kind of a stupid move anyway because that could’ve broken them apart.
She honestly hasn’t really done anything to me since like 2023, but she also didn’t ever make any contact with me.
He wouldn’t ever cheat on me or anything, that’s 110% sure. But I still find it weird that she never ever even followed me on insta or ever invited me to hang out with her and her new boyfriend and my boyfriend, or with my boyfriend and her. And ooooh boy, I tried to be the nicest person to her whenever I could.
My boyfriend told me they didn’t meet up by themselves (his friends don’t like her anymore) because I’m crazy (his words, repeatedly) and I wouldn’t take it right, but that’s a “me problem” because “I don’t know how to handle it”. Which, yeah, that thing I find suspicious would mess with my head!
How would you react in my place? Would you just let it go and tell him to meet with her whenever he wants and he won’t get an adverse reaction from me towards her?
I just want unbiased opinions so maybe I could know how to move forward.
Hello Loose-Atmosphere-625,
You are not in trouble or anything, this is just a simple copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed.
Original post: (Sorry for the broken English) My boyfriend and I have been together from almost four years now.
He has a girl best friend and they know eachother from like 5th grade. They both liked eachother but never got to be together because he liked her first for a while and then moved on (with other girls and then me), and then she liked him.
When we started dating she had a boyfriend but apparently still got upset at the fact that we were together. He gave her a ride (she’s closer to his house) and when he got to my house she didn’t really switch to the back seat (or offered to), she went on the front seat alongside him the whole time until we got there.
She didn’t really talk to me at all, even when I was trying to pick up conversation with her in the car ride to the friend’s party (it was the first time we met, as my boyfriend and were I starting to date). I met certain people that day that I’ve been “friends” with since that moment but she chose to seat from like a 8 feet distance in between us and didn’t engage in conversation with our side of the table.
Then, he had a fight with her that time about that, that he moved on so (as she supposedly did) but she didn’t act like she did. He also told me like their morals didn’t align anymore but now they seem to be doing OK.
She had other attitudes with me (like the other 3 times we saw eachother, because their friend group is no longer in contact with her, just my bf) but I don’t see her anymore.
She -up until this day- hasn’t even tried to get to know me, and to me that’s kind of sus because why wouldn’t you want to be close with your best friend’s girlfriend? That’s kind of a stupid move anyway because that could’ve broken them apart.
She honestly hasn’t really done anything to me since like 2023, but she also didn’t ever make any contact with me.
He wouldn’t ever cheat on me or anything, that’s 110% sure. But I still find it weird that she never ever even followed me on insta or ever invited me to hang out with her and her new boyfriend and my boyfriend, or with my boyfriend and her. And ooooh boy, I tried to be the nicest person to her whenever I could.
My boyfriend told me they didn’t meet up by themselves (his friends don’t like her anymore) because I’m crazy (his words, repeatedly) and I wouldn’t take it right, but that’s a “me problem” because “I don’t know how to handle it”. Which, yeah, that thing I find suspicious would mess with my head!
How would you react in my place? Would you just let it go and tell him to meet with her whenever he wants and he won’t get an adverse reaction from me towards her?
I just want unbiased opinions so maybe I could know how to move forward.
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Yes, it is weird, and your boyfriend shouldn’t be OK with that either.
Thank you for your help. What would you advise?🥲
I personally would ask him if she matters more to him than me and if I matter more, I’m respectfully asking him to cut ties with her or else you cut ties with him.
I'd just tell him "Ok, you can hang out with [girl friend] alone, and I'll go hang out with [pick a single guy friend] alone." Since he's not doing anything suspicious, he shouldn't have a problem with you doing the same thing, right?
Gee, I wonder why?