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It's major abdominal surgery. That's enough for me to want to avoid it if possible.

Just for me personally I didn't want a surgery if I didn't need one with weeks of recovery time. I have had two very straight forward vaginally births with no trauma and being able to get up afterwards and have a shower and walk around was joyful. I have had plenty of friends have planned and unplanned C-Sections though and they've had great experiences.

Major abdominal surgery vs. a natural process with its own risks and recoveries. People pick their hard. You do you, just make sure it's an informed choice with your doctor. The online shaming brigade can kick rocks.

No shame in women that do have them but I personally don't want one because I don't want the long recovery/deal with a wound 😓 I'm having twins so ill most likely have to have a C-section

For me there are a couple of reasons but I have had some minor abdominal surgery in the past and the recovery from it was very difficult - I can’t imagine recovering from a c section and having a new baby. I know lots of people do and will say it’s ok but my experience of my past surgery suggests it’s not for me.

I am completely on board with people having the right to choose how they give birth and how ever it happens it is giving birth. For me a vaginal birth feels right. This might sound daft but through my whole pregnancy (38+3) I have trusted my body than it knows what it’s doing. My way of managing the idea of birth is that my body knows what to do there as well. This isn’t about idealising something as I know it’s going to be so painful and all kinds of complications may come up, but it helps me to stay settled and to trust in my ability if that makes any sense.

I had an unplanned c section.

I was hoping to avoid one because I was worried about the recovery from having surgery. I had a positive experience, though, and was up and about within twelve hours. It was better than expected.

I was most nervous about not being able to drive for a fortnight post caesar.

I was annoyed because I had spent a lot of time, effort and money on seeing a women's health physio.

I was more worried about the prospect of forceps than I was about having a c section. They terrified me.

If I am able to have another child, I will have a planned c section.

I'm not sure I understand why you think it would be preferable? It is a serious surgery with a long and often painful recovery and you can't just rest you have to care for a baby. As with any surgery there is risk and complications can arise. If you want a big family csections aren't going to be good because each time it gets more dangerous due to the build up of scar tissue, I believe 3 sections is the limit before it because very dangerous. For the baby it's not ideal either because they don't exit the birth canal which has benefits for them as the mucus gets squeezed out (my C-section baby was very fluidy for weeks) and they miss out on some microbione (not a scientist probably not the right word) that massively helps their gut. A successful regular natural birth is always going to be the ideal, but a C-section is always there when that isn't looking likely.

The recovery can be long and brutal and can prevent you from some of the "normal" postpartum activities (bending over to pick up baby being a biggy). It also scars. It's a major surgery and comes with all the risks associated therewith.

I'm not anti-c-section, I'm so grateful we have the tech to help women and babies for whom vaginal delivery isn't possible / healthy, but I wouldn't choose to have one.

Why do you feel drawn towards C-section and away from vaginal birth?

I had a planned c section for my first and going back again for my second. I had a positive experience but I know thats not the same for everyone.

I think, one of the main factors is that every subsequent pregnancy and C-section come with increased risks, and in my country, for example, any birth after a second C-section is an automatic C-section without attempting VBAC due to risks of rupturing and all that.

Then again, I don’t particularly like people pushing for natural births only, because the most important thing is that both mother and child stay alive and healthy. My labor stalled at 7 cm dilation, so I had an emergency C-section, and at that point I was so exhausted and drained that it was basically the highlight of my day. I’m now pregnant again and I’m not considering VBAC because my first attempt at vaginal birth was traumatic for me and I want a more controlled environment.

So, you should study the information on both types of birth and decide for yourself what it is that you want. In pregnancy and child rearing, everyone has polarising opinions on every topic with proof and data and sources, so it’s no use trying to find out what’s universally best. What works for you is the best, and that’s it.

planned c-section vs unplanned is very very different. the recovery from planned is much easier and scarring is minimal. unplanned is a very difficult recovery because you already have pushed and are cutting after going through trauma. Also dr is in a rush so scarring is worse.

my recovery from a planned cs is way better than my friends who did vaginal. however i’m in US and understand many countries do not allow for that. For me knowing the date and having a calm and relaxed and fast birth was so good for me mentally. also no issues with baby latching or anything. also with planned cs you get to know your ob is doing it vs whoever on call at hospital.

i was shamed by people when i mentioned planned cs so i just stopped saying it.

when i shared my birth experience people were very surprised. tbh it was easier than what vaginal is for some ppl where things aren’t perfect. and i am good with that! life is hard why make it harder?

i would have done whatever to have my baby, but im blessed that bringing him into the world was stress free

I ended up with a c section after baby’s heart tones were indicating distress and honestly I’m glad I had a c section.

I’m 9 days PP and I feel quite good. No vaginal tearing, no problems pooping, not too heavy bleeding. I feel totally fine except if I push myself too long I’m sore. The first few days ofc were a bit harder but even so when I was sitting down I felt fine.

Important caveats:, I had my section when I was 5 cm dilated so I had not entered active labor. And I worked out my entire pregnancy and slept well so I went into surgery in great shape. And I have a fully equal partner who does an eight hour night shift with baby so I can sleep and take over for the next 8 hours. And he slept nearby and would wake up briefly for any heavy lifting until I was strong enough to pick up baby from crib. If I had a shit partner like so many women post about OR a good partner but one whose job prevented him from helping, things would have been much harder.

Also, I think it’s huge that I never wanted to breastfeed and started on formula day one. Having a baby on my boob all the time post c section I think would have made my experience totally different: and by that I mean hellish. Recovering physically while serving as a food source and trying to get milk to come in would have been just miserable, I am quite sure.

Edit: I did originally want an elective c section and then my pregnancy was so easy I decided to try for vaginal, thinking that okay an uncomplicated vaginal delivery is better than surgery. Then I had to have the c section and I’m glad I did bc who knows what would have happened to baby or me if I’d insisted on vaginal. So you could take my approach which was, try for vaginal but have very low threshold for going into c section.

I had an unplanned C-section when I had my first and then a VBAC pool birth for my second. Even with a third degree tear (my son came out with his fist to his face), I was physically much more able to do things quicker after my vaginal birth than I was my C-section.

I honestly do not care how other people give birth, they have to do what is best for them but I had always wanted to have a pool birth.

Csections definitely aren’t the easy way out and are major surgery. I think they are great for some people but not for everyone. There is increased risk of breathing problems for your baby post birth with a C-section as they aren’t squeezed as they are born, increased risk of placenta issues and uterine rupture in future pregnancies, also increased risk of infection in the incision site, increased risk of DVT and organ injury. But there is also a decreased risk of uterine/pelvic dysfunction.

I also personally am a big believer that unless it’s medically necessary to get your baby out sooner, a baby comes when it’s ready to come.

Having a newborn is so intense that I can’t imagine how hard it would be to recover from surgery at the same time as learning to be a mom. It sounds so hard. I can’t imagine.

It also increases your risk for uterine rupture, and there’s a risk that future embryos could implant in the scar tissue which is scary.

No one should be shamed for choosing a c section. If you find yourself in an online space where pregnant people are being shamed for the choices they make about their own bodies, its probably best to get out of there. In evidence-based spaces, health professionals such as midwives typically raise questions about the healthcare system (in particular, in the US) where many doctors push for c sections that aren’t medically necessary, because of training, or because they are convenient for the doctor. There should always be room to choose how you give birth (within reason).

No shaming from me. Different things are going to work for different people. I am hoping for a vag!nal birth myself and here are some reasons why I would prefer that over a c section

1. A c section often requires a longer stay in hospital after birth

2. It is a major surgery and that always comes with higher risks of complications and possibility for infection

3. Recovery is just much harder (typically). Can’t get out of bed by yourself easily, harder when getting up at night to pick up baby. While you are trying to feed baby and have them grow you are also now recovering from major surgery on top of it.

4. There can be some more difficulties for baby after c section often in regards to their lungs and fluid. Not usually a big issue but leaves them more susceptible to complications.

5. On an emotional side I just dream of having my baby come out and having immediate cuddles with me and husband. The likeliness of that happening just goes down with c section

6. In Canada they really don’t do elective c sections (I am in Canada)

7. No matter what new born stage and post partum is rlly hard and exhausting. I just want to maximize my shot of making it as easy as possible.

8. I’ve talked to moms who had a vaginal birth first and then with their second had to have a c section and all of them say that the vaginal birth was a MUCH easier recovery and less painful recovery

At the end of the day my hope for my birth is to have the best plan in place for a mentally and physically safe birth. To me c sections do have more risks than a vag!inal birth (obviously there are circumstances where that’s not true ie previous c sections, certain medical conditions etc..) for both me and baby and so I would rather avoid it unless medically necessary.

C sections are a really amazing thing. They save lives every single day. I just believe they are better used for medically necessary cases. That being said u do what is the best option for u and anyone who has an attitude about it can buzz off

Can I ask why

Mostly because it’s major surgery and recovery can be longer.

I had a planned c-section in 2024 (baby was breech and had IUGR so flipping her wasn’t an option) and my experience was wonderful. I recovered extremely quick and felt almost back to normal in a few days minus some tenderness if I laughed or coughed. They do say that a planned c-section is a lot easier to recover from than an unplanned one because your body hasn’t gone through labor for hours/days prior.

My SIL had a vaginal birth 4 days after my c-section and her recovery was worse and took longer than mine. She tore pretty bad and couldn’t sit without a lot of pain for over a week.

I think C sections are a miracle of modern medicine and have saved numerous lives of mothers and babies.

That being said, I don’t want to cut into my abdomen unless it’s absolutely necessary.

I wanted a c section right when I found out I was pregnant. It was the best decision ever. Recovery for me was 6 weeks which is usually how long it takes for a vaginal birth as well. I am used to surgeries and so I loved it. Got there at 5 am for check in, got to the OR at 8am ish, and had my baby at 8:25 am and then stayed in the hospital for 4 nights because my son was in the NICU (not related to the c section). When I was pregnant (2022) everything out there was against c sections and I was worried about finding a doctor that would do an elective c section. I found one at 32 weeks and he was amazing! I also told him I didn’t want to breastfeed and he gave me ideas on how to stunt that after birth. One thing I was worried about as we were getting close was that I would go into labor before my appointment date! Thankfully that didn’t happen for me. However it is something that can happen! If it does happen, my doctor said they would still do the c section because that is what I chose. However, I think recovery may have looked different? Not sure though. Anyways, I couldn’t recommend a c section enough 😂 if I ever have another baby, I will also do a c section.

It's a very individualized decision when considering vaginal vs scheduled C-section. However, one future possible complication from a prior c-section is placenta Accreta in future pregnancies.

"There are several risk factors for placenta accreta spectrum. The most common is a previous cesarean delivery, with the incidence of placenta accreta spectrum increasing with the number of prior cesarean deliveries"

Sauce: https://www.acog.org/clinical/clinical-guidance/obstetric-care-consensus/articles/2018/12/placenta-accreta-spectrum

I personally wanted to avoid C-section to avoid major abdominal surgery unless it was absolutely necessary for me and baby.

My first delivery was vaginal. I pushed for 4 hours, nearly bled out, 4th degree tear and tailbone bruising, I couldn’t sit down for weeks and my body still isn’t the same. Next baby I had a planned c-section due to placenta previa and the recovery was a BREEZE comparatively. I was up on my feet within a couple days and thrilled not to have bodily trauma down there. 3 years later my incision is not even visible.

It is true if you would like to have several children the c-section might be limiting, and you do have to space pregnancies out with at least 18 months in between for the best outcome. But a planned c-section is very routine and more predictable than vaginal labor IMO. Just wanted to share another perspective.

My c-section and recovery were fantastic and it will 100% do it again. My babies heads are measuring 40+ weeks when I’m only 34 weeks pregnant. I feel like a lot of the complications come with emergency c sections, but I am certainly not a doctor

I had a pretty easy recovery from c section compared to others’ descriptions. I work in healthcare and Ive seen some terrible vaginal deliveries and didn’t want to subject myself to those possibilities so had a primary c section. It was a fantastic experience

A planned cesarian and an emergency cesarian are two different animals, in my opinion. Ive had one of each, and am having my 3rd csection in march.

I think a lot of people are thinking of an emergency csection when they are thinking of the procedure, which is given when things are going badly for you or baby during birth. It can be traumatic.

And of course with any surgery there are risks to consider, and healing time to factor in.

For me I feel that it is unnecessary surgery unless it's medically needed. Also vaginal births are better for the baby since it's more natural and offer positive side effects (I'm sorry if the wording is bad, english is not my first language and I don't know how to write it out in a better way). This is not to say that C-sections are bad, I just wouldn't choose it unless it is medically necessary because of these reasons.

Microbiome research also indicates better outcomes for kids born vaginally vs c sections due to initial seeding during birth.

Vaginal swabs for c section babies had shown no demonstrable benefit in recent studies. They believe that's because much of the microbiome seeding comes from Mom's poo and less from vaginal fluids.

You can make up for these factors with breastfeeding and a healthy diet when your baby starts solids. Also pets and exposure to the outdoors.

Poor microbiome development seems to be the underlying cause of asthma and autoimmune conditions especially in kids.

I had an emergency c section so not trying to say they're bad. Just would not elect for one.

Also recovery was horrible.

What other major surgery do you have where you’re expected to go home, carry on like nothing happened and look after a whole new person?! After my vaginal birth, I was up and showered as soon as we were done with our golden hour (more like 3 hours to be honest, but regardless). I felt completely fine. I know that I’m lucky in terms of not every birth is as straightforward, but I definitely felt well enough to get up and about.

Wanted the experience of giving birth vaginally, did NOT want the experience of a c-section. Very strong personal preference just like you have for a c-section. I had a breech baby and was having panic attacks/depression symptoms at the thought of not having the delivery I wanted. Everything worked out in the end thankfully.

I had an unplanned c-section after 48h of labour with my first, and while unexpected, it was a great experience. Much better than the experience of my friends who delivered vaginally, tore end to end, couldn’t sit for weeks, had to have repair surgery, and have long term side effects like horrible haemorrhoids and painful sex. This is over half of my friends who have had babies, so not a small percentage in the slightest.

My recovery from was also not very long at all! I was walking with assistance after 12h and after the first week had barely no pain. The only negative I can think of, is that my breast milk took a little longer to come in.

I’m pregnant with my second now and will do an elective C-section. Screw the stigma, do what’s best for you. My vagina is great, my sex life is great, my abs recovered fine, my toddler is healthy as can be, and I refuse to go through 48h of that same shit ever again.

And please remember, there are no medals of honour for delivering one way or another! Motherhood is a long lifetime role, how you got there doesn’t matter in the slightest.

One last thing - the microbiome flora people talk about that the baby picks up from the vagina is great - for the first 6 months or so. As soon as baby starts solids, what they eat is incredibly more important than the way they came out of you. The gut microbiome is a living evolving thing, affected by everything we eat and drink, stress, and a million other factors. All these moms who take so much pride in their vaginal deliveries and shame others, while feeding their toddlers chicken nuggets and fries, can suck it for all I care.

i’m planning on a c-section because my connective tissue disorder puts me at higher risk of rupture, prolapse, and dislocating my pelvic bones during a vaginal delivery. i’m scared of the recovery time from major abdominal surgery but i’d like to keep my hips in place please

idk but i have a super narrow pelvis and built exactly like my mom. she had 4 9lb+ babies and all ended with episiotomies. so i also was hoping for a csection. they induced me a week early because he was measuring big and would have hit 10lbs if he got to 40 weeks. everyone kept saying those measurements are inaccurate, he won’t be that big. my induction failed due to dilation not passing 9.5 cm (i was at that for 4 hours) and we found out he was sunny side up. my dr also thought he would definitely get stuck. got my csection in the end lol he was 9lbs 10oz so thank god.

I had an elective c-section! Do what’s right for you and your baby and fuck what everyone thinks. This is your pregnancy not theirs!

I’ve elected C-section with my second (and now my third currently 32 weeks pregnant) due to have shoulder dystocia with my first and almost loosing her it’s not a risk I’m willing to take

I had a c section 5 weeks ago and would honestly choose one again. Obviously everyone's recovery is different,with both vaginal and c section. Mine was very straight forward and honestly once I got past day 2 the pain was very minimal! Standing for the first time was the worst part but I was honestly expecting it to be so much worse. Don't know why it gets such a negative rep 😅

I don’t know. I didn’t want to “try” natural labor and then end up with an awful tear, or an emergency c-section because that recovery is awful I hear. My two scheduled c-sections were a breeze and so was recovery!

I just want to say that my husband was a labor and delivery nurse and has been present for all the different types of delivery and he recommends I have an elective c section. Obviously he wasn’t present for the moms’ recoveries at home so I get that part is almost always harder from c sections but I think if you have a very supportive partner that will pick up the slack and help you the first couple of weeks, an elective c section sounds like a good choice to me. No one should be shaming anyone about any type of birth!

One risk to also think about future pregnancies, as a previous c-section does increase the risk of uterine rupture, and also there are cases of miscarriage if the next pregnancy implants in the c-section scar

Honestly, it’s okay to do what’s right for your mental health.

My first baby was a vaginal birth, and I had third-degree tears, a failed epidural, and back labor. The physical recovery from the tears alone was one of the most painful experiences of my life.

My second baby was a C-section. I was terrified of having another vaginal birth — and it was, hands down, a better experience both physically and emotionally.

Don’t let anyone shame you for choosing what feels safest for your body and your mind.

I don’t know who is shaming you, but in many European countries this is not a choice you are allowed to make unless there are medical reasons for it. The argument being it’s a massive surgery, whereas a vaginal birth - a priori - is « natural » (putting quotation marks for lack of a better technical term, this is not an opinion I have that one way is more « natural » than another).

Don't let anyone shame you. The internet (particularly social media) can be super judgy about anything and everything when it comes to mom and baby - blame misogyny.

As the others have said - it is adnominal surgery - if you have a very smooth natural birth, the recovery is likely harder with a c-section. There is some very limited science that says passing through the vaginal canal may give baby some immunities that they don't receive via c-section birth (but this is highly speculative and I've found very little research to support it).

There are sections of the internet (generally not Reddit) that love to say if something is "natural" it is better and I am firmly against this statement. Natural would be a healthy percentage of us not surviving childbirth and our children dying in early childhood - as historically happened for most of human civilization. Just because something happens naturally doesn't make it safe or the best choice for you.

Everyone is different. I know women who have had elective c-sections; I know women who went no epidural - they're all good mothers, they all care deeply about doing what's best for their child (and themselves) and there is nothing wrong with that.

I’ve done it both ways, vaginally and scheduled c-section. Greatly preferred the scheduled c-section. I had a Myomectomy and was told I was only allowed to deliver via cesarean after the birth of my first born. With my vaginal birth, I was torn up and physically sore from pushing for days. The cesarean soreness felt similar to when I had my gallbladder removed. People who have never had one are acting like you have some massive incision or scar. Your doctor does these frequently. My scar is barely the length of my hand and super thin. I have worse scars from dermatology and orthopedic procedures. I was only bummed about the C-section at first because all my future babies would not get the “good bacteria” going down the birth canal.

Honestly I think c-section mamas are so strong. I very much don't want one for a few reasons, including the long recovery and the scar. But my biggest reason is I do not want an epidural at all (terrified of needles, and even more terrified of the risks) so having a c-section for me would most likely mean general anesthetic, which I don't want to put myself, my partner, or my baby through.

I had a c-section, and the recovery was brutal. It is different for everyone, of course, but I was in serious pain for weeks and it took me far longer to get back to anything near “normal” than my friends who had vaginal births. Because you can’t bend and it is painful to even move in and out of bed or a chair, it was difficult (but not impossible) to do basic baby care tasks for upward of 3 weeks. The recovery led to it taking longer for me to feel confident and connected with my baby (again, I’m sure this isn’t the case for everyone). Plus my ab muscles were totally non-functioning between my belly button and incision until I got into physical therapy.  

This is a very personal choice, but I would highly recommend that anyone considering a voluntary c-section research what the recovery looks like. Best of luck with your pregnancy and decision! 

Echoing here about major abdominal surgery as for why I hope to be able to do a vaginal birth. All things being equal, I would prefer to have a faster recovery because my husband and I want to try for baby number 2 as soon as medically advisable. I also have chronic back pain that historically is managed with exercise, particularly core exercise. I imagine beyond the recovery time, it'll be much harder to restore my core baseline post C section.

All that said, I know there are many medical reasons why an emergency C section may be a necessity. My first priority is keeping baby girl and me safe and healthy, more than willing to go the C section route if necessary.

Very much against women lording their personal preference over others as morally superior in a variety of pregnancy options ("We've always waited until baby's born to find out the baby's gender." to "unmedicated birth over epidural" to "vaginal birth over C section"). It's all silly. At the end of the day, you carried a little one and brought them into the world; that's what matters.

I’ve had three. It is a very painful recovery process. They’re slicing your entire body open.

I will say recovery from my planned c-section was a lot easier than the unplanned ones, likely due to the fact that I didn’t labor for days beforehand. Regardless, it was hard. I’m 4 months out from my most recent one and I still have a hard time sitting up from laying on the couch, have to use a step stool to get out of my bed without pain, and occasionally feel pain when lifting something heavy like my older children.

Two days after giving birth I was home on the floor rolling around with my son. I could never have done that with a C section. As others have mentioned it is a major surgery so I wanted to avoid if at all possible.

FTM here, When I had my 20week anatomy scan they saw I had placenta previa, so they said from there that C-section was properly what I would have to have. I got into that mind set from there and was like ok cool we got this did my research talked to my friend that had to have one because her labor wasn’t progressing after 24hrs and baby was in distress… then at 37ish weeks my ultrasound showed my previa resolved but baby had turned breech…(he was a fun pregnancy 🤦‍♀️) so at that appointment we scheduled our C-section at 39 weeks… went back at 38 weeks just so they could check baby’s position and he flipped 🤦‍♀️ but I wasn’t going to change my plans a week out so I stuck to the section. Baby was out in 10ish minutes and in dad’s arms while Dr removed a giant cyst from my since I was already cut open.. I wasn’t only in pain for the first day. I was more annoyed by the catheter that had to leave in for 12 hours because it made it hard to move and get baby out of his bedside bassinet at the hospital, but after the 12hrs and they removed it I was up walking around to and from the bathroom getting in and out of the hospital bed. Took a shower the following day when they took the IV out. Was discharged on day 3 only pain I had was from laughing coughing or bending down. Didn’t take any of the narcotic they gave me a script for just used Tylenol. But you have to keep in mind everyone heals differently. I was driving by day 5 post op they told me I was aloud to 🤷‍♀️ just couldn’t left anything over 15lbs… for atleast 3 weeks…

My vaginal birth sucked. Wasn't "magical" at all. Before that, didnt give a damn how bubs got here as long as she was fine. Im pretty neutral about being cut open and having a baby pulled out of me 🤷‍♀️

I didn’t want a c-section because it’s major surgery, they take longer to heal than vaginal births in general, and “Babies born by C-section miss out on exposure to beneficial maternal vaginal microbes, leading to a different, often less diverse gut microbiome initially, resembling skin bacteria rather than vaginal ones, with lower levels of key bacteria like Bacteroides and higher opportunistic pathogens. This "microbial deprivation" is linked to increased risks of allergies, asthma, autoimmune, and metabolic diseases later in life, though differences often lessen after the first year.”

I just had my 3rd the beginning of this month. There is a difference between having an emergency c section vs scheduling/induction. My first I didn’t go into the hospital thinking I would have one so the first one sucked because I wasn’t prepared and had been wanting a vag birth, hell I actually wanted a home water birth but that’s another story. I honestly have just consciously/unconsciously avoided the C-section shaming online and in my personal life. Ppl are always going to have an opinion and think theirs is the golden standard. Do what you want and what’s best for you. Yes it’s major surgery however personally I would opt for a c section everytime vs having to endure hours of unknown labor issues, possible tears, baby not coming out then having to end up doing a c section after having gone through that for 16+ hours. No thank you. As long as you have a good support system and can actually rest in bed for the first week of being home recovery really isn’t that bad. My last two have been scheduled and I was cleared to start back driving at 2 weeks this time. Still waiting on 6 week check to be cleared for everything else. I only spent 2 days literally came in at 1130am and was being discharged almost exactly 48 hours later. Didn’t have to stay in the hospital very long. I also had a salpingectomy(removed entire fallopian tubes) during the C-section. So that’s a plus I had two surgeries in one, cuz I’m done having tiny humans. I also know that our lady parts are supposed to go back close to where it was before birth not exactly the same but I’m not up for taking chances with that. I didn’t want to be stretched out like that or have any issues with my girl or sensitivity or lack of, incontinence, pelvic floor issues.

My body missed the memo of being the right size to push a baby out even though it’s what our bodies are “suppose to be able to do” lol. So I have had two csections so far and will be having a third and final in April.

I have gone through labor though with my first and sure I do wish I could push them out that way but it’s just not in the cards for me. I would maybe at least just try pushing baby out since the recovery should be easier (not always)

But if you do just choose the csection way it is still major surgery so you won’t be able to walk right away and may need help out of bed all that. I’ve thankfully have two very good recoveries and was up a few hours later and was able to get up myself and also pick my baby up. It really all is dependent on the person. Also like some people have mentioned there are some more risks associated after with any other pregnancies you may have.

There is risks with everything. Childbirth is a wild thing lol.

Im more scared about them tearing through my abdominal muscles than my baby tearing through my lady parts lol.

My sister is about to have her 3rd csection and im about to have my 2nd vag delivery, and each of us admit we could never deliver the way the other one is! No judgement, just interpretations of the pain lol

I’m getting an elective c section! People typically don’t want it because it’s a surgery but for me it’s about pros and cons I love the idea of having a plan, so I can prepare my hospital bag, prepare mentally, shower, do my hair, feel good knowing what I’m going into and not be woken up at 3am with surprise water breaking and having to go into multiple hours of labor and pain. In comparison a c section is ~30 minutes or less. For me, a C section is a no brainer. I’ve had people look at me like I’m nuts but honestly I don’t care

• It's a major abdominal surgery with associated recovery. You can't lift things afterwards which makes taking care of a newborn more difficult, and especially if you have a toddler at home
• Additional risk of complications
• Not able to do skin to skin immediately after birth in the same way
• There is research showing some health benefits to baby having to travel through the birth canal, particularly when it comes to baby's microbiome.

It is absolutely legitimate to choose a c-section for whatever reasons, even if it's just for mom's mental health. But those are some of the reasons people want to avoid that

I really really wanted a vagina birth, J did the exercises, tried to eat all the thing they said would make it happen. I still needed a c-section after 24 hours of labor. Recovery was hard, but it was worth it and I will definitely be choosing one this time around

I do! 🙋🏻‍♀️ I’m getting my elective, purely by preference, c-section in February and stoked about it 🙌🏻

I had an elective c section mostly due to severe anxiety from a pregnancy and birth phobia. I’d rather have 100 c sections than a vaginal birth thanks. Recovery was brutal but doable with support. My sister still experiences complications from a traumatic vaginal birth 5 years ago. 9 months pp and all I have is a little numbness at the incision site.

I don’t know? Been asking the same thing. My c-section is scheduled for 3 an 1/2 weeks from now. Glad to know my delivery will take 40-50mins. I’m high risk, and baby is still breech. I am happy to be doing this procedure. I won’t mind the recovery time.

I really enjoyed mine but it was a scheduled c section. I think a lot of times ppl think of emergency c sections which are scary and usually after ppl have been in labor for hours. Now, I had a valid reason for a c section I got my fibroids removed and can’t do vaginal birth. I healed really quickly from mine and thankfully didn’t have complications

I’m going to leave this here for the shame brigade to ponder. Personally I’m still hoping for a vaginal delivery because I’m doing this solo and am scared of caring for a newborn while recovering for a C. However, a planned C is definitely an option I’ll be considering too eg if baby’s head continues to measure quite big. 

https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ajogmf.2023.101186

“ Planned cesarean delivery was associated with significant decreases in adverse neonatal outcomes such as low umbilical artery pH, birth trauma, tube feeding requirement, and hypotonia, and significant decreases in chorioamnionitis, urinary incontinence, and painful perineum. Planned vaginal delivery was associated with significant decreases in need for general anesthesia and wound infection“

https://doi.org/10.1136/bmj.317.7172.1554

“ Elective caesarean section has an inverse association with newborn encephalopathy.” (Inverse association meaning that planned C sections result in fewer cases of newborn encephalopathy/HIE than vaginal deliveries or C sections performed during labor)

Its true that babies born with pre-labor Cs don’t get the same microbiome boost as with other delivery modes, but its easier to give a baby probiotics than to try and help them recover from brain hypoxia…. :/

I can understand the wanting to avoid a major surgery aspect of disliking c-sections. My husband had open heart surgery in August for a genetic condition that they said “let’s fix this while he’s young” when he was recovering in the ICU his Nurse told him that the only surgery comparable with risks and hard recovery is a C-section. WELL. I had an emergency C-section a little over a week ago after a lot of complications with preeclampsia and my pregnancy. I do agree with the Nurse now. It’s been over a week and I’m still having a lot of issues sitting and standing, walking, sneezing, coughing.

However I don’t think it’s just fear of a major surgery. My whole life I’ve heard people imply that you’re less of a mom if you’ve had a c-section because it’s not “real labor” just talking down to c-section moms because it’s “the easy way out” which I think honestly is horse shit. As someone who labored for 48 hours before my c-section as long as baby comes out healthy you are a mom.

Also I had no idea you could elect for a c-section. So you learn something new everyday!

1. People see it as the easy way (it most definitely is not)
2. It’s not “natural”

People are gonna judge and have silly opinions over everything.

They’re scared of the surgery aspect which is understandable. But there’s many benefits to a C section, not just for you but also the baby. I had an elective one, no regrets.

I had an elective c section.

2 weeks postpartum and I’m pretty much back to normal. I get the occasional pulling by my stitches but other than that I don’t notice it.

Week one is inconvenient at best. I had an easy time and recovery if I’m being completely honest

I did not want a c section due to my he recovery time I had read about online. I ended up getting a c section and would have cartwheeled out of that hospital the same day if they let me. I had a pretty easy recovery from it and had to force myself to not do too much for a few weeks. I know this isn’t the norm at all, but if I was to get pregnant again I would feel very comfortable getting another c section. I was extremely active during my pregnancy (walked 3+ miles a day and hiked four national parks when I was 6 months+), so I’m very sure that had something to do with my recovery.

I’ve had one of each - a smooth vaginal delivery with no major complications (just minor tearing) and a planned C section. I personally would take the C section again. Yeah the first couple days sucks but they give you Oxycodone in the hospital if you ask for it so I was chilling. By 2 weeks I had no pain really at all. I loved not having contractions or going through labor. Neither way is going to be a walk in the park but I personally would rather have a sore abdomen for a couple weeks than a torn vagina. Sex and tampons were painful for months after my vaginal delivery.

I will say the C section recovery would have been way worse if I didn’t have a supportive partner to carry a lot of the weight early on. I also didn’t breast feed so he was able to do a lot of feeding too

Honestly I didn’t get to choose BUT the surgery itself went smoothly and my recovery was amazing. Like I was standing and walking around the room perfectly the next day. Everyone was shocked at how great I looked/seemed.

Didn’t need any additional rest. If this new pregnancy ends up in a c section I won’t mind at all!

I don’t know! I think they are scared? I’ve had so many surgeries it’s like what is one more? The only part that freaked me out was being awake for it and I definitely have ptsd from not having my pain treated afterwards. I will choose a repeat c section for my subsequent children.

I was convinced I wanted a c-section from the moment I found out I was pregnant. There was NO way I'd be delivering that kid. Somewhere between the 5/6th month I decided no to a c-section because I didn't think I'd be able to depend on my partner to take care of everything (we live on a farm). Decided to do a scheduled induction instead, and glad I did. Unlike every other woman in my family I was able to delivery vaginally, and was back to do farm chores within 4ish days.

I knew I wanted to avoid a C section when my work (a major health insurance provider) would give me an extra two weeks of paid leave afterwards. If my EMPLOYER thinks I should take more time away afterwards to recover, then it’s not something I want to mess with if at all possible!

After birth and an hour or so of rest with my baby while my epidural wore off I was able to get up by myself with not much pain (besides some vaginal soreness) and go to the bathroom and change my clothes and unpack some things. I've had surgeries in the past and the anesthesia alone knocks me totally on my ass for hours. Not to mention the major abdominal surgery that does not make it easy to move around.

Hey OP, I’m sorry you’ve encountered c-section shaming online, - it can be really awful out there. Just my anecdotal experience for perspective - I’ve had a completely elective, non-medically indicated cesarean, and it was an absolutely amazing experience, I’ve literally had zero pain, was back in the gym after 6 weeks. Won’t do it any other way!

I did not want a c section and had dreams of a beautiful natural birth. This is not how it went down and I had a scheduled c section at 39 weeks with my first due to her being breech. It was SUCH a peaceful birth. I had a great recovery. I will be having a scheduled c section again as I’m 10 weeks with our second!

I did a lot of talking to other people before I had my baby because I was choosing an elective section. I learned a few things: a planned c-section is a lot different on the body than an unplanned c-section. Your body was already going through the trauma of labor before it then had the trauma of a c-section. A lot of the people I spoke to who were against c-sections never actually had one, and some were people who had one in an emergent situation and therefore felt robbed of their ideal birthing planning. Some people who had planned sections went back and had vbacs and preferred the vaginal method, but a lot of the people who had planned sections said they had a great experience. Now I can’t speak to how things are with the NHS, but how your labor or section goes in the US is largely dependent on your location of the hospital, state you are in, and your insurance. I happened to have my baby in NY and have great insurance. I had a wonderful experience with my planned section. The baby was immediately seen by the pediatrician on call after birth, the fluid was sucked out of her just fine, and then she was handed to me to hold. Yes the pain was god awful the first day. You are come down off of the spinal tap and yes you have a massive cut in your body. But by day three I was up and walking around, I could get out of bed just fine, I was walking up and down stairs unassisted, and while lifting my baby was difficult the first couple of days, it got easier. But at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what anyone else here tells you. It’s your body, you need to make the choice that is best for you and your mental health. Both methods have their own inherent risks, no one way is better than the other, and both have recoveries that can have lasting effects in different ways.

I got a c section and I don’t regret it. At all.

It’s major surgery (internal and external scars), more dangerous for mom and baby, typically a harder recovery

I find the reaction to planned c-sections beyond frustrating. The over-hyping of natural birth because it’s “natural” (so are many natural catosprophies btw). The normalization of women suffering and birth brutality and pain is beyond me. I will never get over my birth story. 26 hours of hell only to be sent to an emergency c-section. Let me tell you I felt no bigger relief in my life. Recovery was waaaaay easier than labor and not traumatic at all.

I think it’s such weird behaviour shaming someone for having a section whether it’s planned or not. Who cares??? As for why they wouldn’t want it for themselves — it’s a huge surgery! I had an emergency section that led to complications with my first and required daily wound care for 8 weeks due to an infection in my incision. Super sucked. That being said — my next kiddo will be here January 27th via scheduled section! 😅

I had a c-section and the recovery wasn’t bad at all for me. I think it just depends on the person. A lot of my friends who had a rough recovery labored for a long time before needing a c-section which I think is harder on the body.

For me the biggest reason was that it's a major surgery that usually takes a lot longer to heal than wounds from a vaginal birth.

Second factor was that i wanted the experience. Birthing a baby is a once in a lifetime event (even if you have multiple kids, every birth is different) that i didn't want to miss out on. And now, 9 days after giving birth i can say oh boy did i underestimate how big of an impact it would have on me.

I had an extremely long birthing process that had me questioning myself in the middle but i pushed through without a PDA and avoided a c-section by sheer will (doctors said most women would have taken one at that point) and i can truly say that this experience has changed me in a fundamental way. I am beyond glad i did it, even if it was one of the hardest things i have ever done, i am thankful for this unique opportunity and experience. I now know my body better than i ever did and damn i think i have never been so proud of it and myself.

I now truly understand the saying: Not only is the child born through the mother, but the mother is also born through the child.

I have had 4 births an the last was a emergency c-section so I labored almost completely as well. But that was the worst experience of my life. I had a really hard recovery with a lot of pain. Good thing it was my last kid cause don’t think I would do it again.

Hey I had a C-section 👋 I could barely move for about two days, and then I could slowly walk with a lot of help for another couple days, but I can’t even imagine trying to hold a baby or clean bottles or even get out of bed for that first week. So if you do this, please make sure you have help, full hands-on 24/7 help, for at least the first few weeks…

Edit to add:  my baby was in the hospital for several months so I didn’t have to worry about holding him at all for the first several weeks of my recovery. Good luck! The actual surgery itself really wasn’t bad.

Look I’m very much a you do you type of person. Personally (second on the way, 28 weeks pregnant) i rather endure a vaginal birth and avoid a C-section at all costs and by any means possible. Not because I’m afraid of the recovery or anything. I just don’t like the idea of not being able to move my arms (from what I’ve been told and researched). THAT freaks me out. It actually taps in to a little bit of a phobia I have so for me it’s a hard no lol

If I had another kid, I’d have a planned c-section. My placenta adhered to my uterus the first time so it was necessary, especially with a breech baby that had no space to turn. I was in and out from surgery in an hour, I was back up walking and living normally 12 hours later.

I was someone who wanted a csection my whole pregnancy. I decided in the 3rd trimester that I would try natural, and if all else fails, move on to csection.

Well, labor failed, had csection and the worst 6 weeks trying to recover. Would not recommend at all.

A planned c section for me was way easier (was told I needed one for medical reasons after a very bad first delivery) but my first c section was hell. I labored for 40 hours and then needed a c section so I needed to recover from both essentially, my stomach muscles to this day get Charley horses every time I bend over too long - it's not easy. But my second was easier, but still MAJOR recovery. Also not being able to lift my own baby when he cried was torture for me for a week or so. Milk comes in slower, can't drive, can't pick up my toddler, can hardly lift my 9lb baby, and I recovered in the hospital with him cause he was hospitalized for a week. Not a fun recovery

I had to have a C-section, I think people told Me it was so bad that I prepared for the worst. Recovery has been pretty smooth just need to make sure I take the meds on time and not overdo it too much.

I’ve had laparoscopic surgery before, and even recovery from that took a while. I can’t imagine spending the first few weeks of life with my newborn laid up, unable to do as much as I’d like. I think it would make that stage really hard.

I would rather take my c section over vaginal birth any day. My dr cleared me to drive after a week, I stopped taking narcotics and I was fine. I hated my vaginal birth I was in pain for 3 weeks and couldn’t sit down!

I wasn’t entirely numb for my section as it was an emergency and it was the worst feeling I’ve ever felt. Imagine feeling someone ripping your flesh and fat like a piece of steak because that’s EXACTLY what it feels like. My organs were taken out and set into bowls. My daughter was purple because they’re not having the natural birth order that signals them to breathe. They took her and I obviously couldn’t do immediate skin to skin. My milk never fully came in due to the trauma my body had gone through. Additionally, I’m 1.5 years out and I still can’t feel the lower half of my stomach until someone pushes on it and it feels like straight scar tissue deeply. Getting pregnant again is also incredibly painful. I’m pregnant now and it’s hurt on my scar the entire time. I cried for 4 weeks because I didn’t want to have a c section again. I didn’t let my husband touch me for a year I was so scared I’d get pregnant and have to go through it again. Id rather rip my uterus from my body with my ow bare hands than have another c section.

I loved my C-sections. Was 90% after a week with both. I just can’t describe the fear of pushing a baby out. No thank you.

major surgery where your abdominals may never be the same sounds like a good reason. Brutal recovery period.

I had a C section after an induction and 48 hours of labor. I wanted a vaginal birth but was prepared to do whatever I had to if needed. Having a C section and caring for a newborn immediately after was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. It was painful and I don’t wish to repeat it if I can help it.

I’ve had two c sections and it was enough for me to never have another kid. Recovery was awful both times. The first was an emergency and traumatizing. The second was “planned” but I went into labor two weeks early so smoother but still awful. Recovery with a toddler and a newborn was difficult and complicated. If I could have had my babies the other way I would be so much happier. My husband went into for a vasectomy so now I don’t have to worry again.

I had a c section and wouldn’t choose it again. Mine was unplanned, but in no way emergent. For starters, I lost way too much blood after and ended up almost bottoming out in recovery. I couldn’t hold baby or try to nurse so basically the baby nurse held him near me and tried to get him to latch. It was stressful and a little scary. Obv that isn’t guaranteed to happen, but a surgical risk.

Once in my room, I couldn’t walk or get out of bed for 20 hours. I was dizzy and had a horrible headache from the blood loss and had to have 2 blood transfusions.

I don’t say anything this to scare you at all! Just as a surgical risk that I’d avoid if I could!

Because it’s major abdominal surgery, I couldn’t lift baby out of the bassinet for about a week. And forget getting in and out of a normal bed. My husband had to lay me down and lift me out since you have no abdominal strength. I also couldn’t drive for about 6 weeks due to the lack of abdominal strength. You can’t hit the brakes or anything if you needed to so they advise against driving.

all that to say, that I’d 100% do it again to get my son and it wasn’t all horrible, but if I had a choice, I wouldn’t pick one.

i wanted a c-section because no women in my family had successful vaginal births and the doctors told me no and that they wanted me to try naturally since it was my first time but scheduled an induction because my baby was overdue. i get induced and dilate 10cm but my baby was still too high up and was not coming out. after 4 hours of pushing and the epidural coming out TWICE i finally begged for a c- section. they said they could try to vacuum him out but if that wasn’t successful after 3 tries then i would have a c-section anyway. the surgery was great but i could feel the tugging which was a strange feeling. recovery was amazing and you can’t even see my c-section scar at all. i feel like it was the best option for me and my baby.

Our bodies, barring complications, are made to have babies. I do NOT want a full on abdominal surgery, getting seven layers of tissue cut through and my body shoved around and dug into all while AWAKE. I’ve been the support person for a cesarean and it was terrifying and it wasn’t even happening to me. I’ve had three vaginal births and two were inductions, one with back labor and a sunny side up baby, and I was able to hold onto my self control and didn’t have any pain medication and they were all amazing empowering experiences. I was up and walking within thirty minutes and recovered completely (aside from postpartum bleeding—which cesarean moms also experience) within five days, even in the instances where I tore.

Im an odd ball here. I chose to have a C-section instead of trying vaginal birth. I didn’t want to risk a horrible tear. I was afraid of prolapse and long term issues with my pelvic floor. Part of me wonders how a vaginal birth would’ve gone, but most of me is very happy I went with the C-section instead. Yes, it’s a big surgery, but pushing a bowling ball out of your coochie is also trauma for your body

So I’m five days post unplanned c-section. It was my first birth so I can’t compare it to anything else, but let me tell you. The lack of ability to do anything with my core has been hard. I also didn’t do a ton of prep or research for how to recover from a c section since I was planning for an unmediated vaginal birth.

My biggest concern right now is that the car seat/baby combo is over the weight limit I can lift. I can do much of anything around the house when I have a few spare minutes. I’m fortunate to have a helpful and supportive husband, plus I have my mom for another week. I don’t know how it’s going to go after that week.

Also. Bowl movements. If you’re going planned c section route take stool softeners for like a week BEFORE. It’s a battle.

And then on top of everything else, c section was scary. You can’t feel pain, but you can feel them rooting around in there. I also have bad reactions to anesthesia. I vomited for 12 hours off and on after. And I vomited excessively in the OR. Thankfully I felt it coming so they got a bucket in front of me. Even water would send me into a vomiting spell. And then when I stopped putting anything down, I would dry heave. Which puking with a fresh abdominal wound hurts man.

Also I watched a video of a c section later and when your anesthesiologist tells you “it’s going to feel like someone is standing on your chest” it’s because someone basically is. They use like all their body weight to force the baby out through the incision.

I had a c-section and I LOVED it! Granted, the circumstances for why I needed it were not fun (daughter was in distress after almost 2 days of labor), but the experience itself was pretty great.

A lot of people are against the surgery aspect and a lot of people’s recovery is pretty awful. I understand it’s a major surgery, but to me a vaginal birth is like… close to a surgery if that makes sense? Your vagina quite literally expands 10x its normal size, people tear and require stitches, babies can get stuck in the canal and require having the vagina CUT OPEN. All of that is very surgery-adjacent to me if that makes sense.

As for the recovery, it sucks for some people. I personally didn’t have any issue and I think I had a faster healing time than some of my friends with vaginal births. I was up and showering the next day, I was doing TONS of walking (daughter was in the NICU for 7 days so walking from the parking deck to the entrance and up to her room, then back down to the car again twice a day every day for a week). I have a huge, wonderful support system so I wasn’t worried about doing cleaning/cooking/driving/lifting. I also stayed on top of my ibuprofen. I felt totally back to normal by 6-7 weeks.

It’s such a deeply personal decision. I really enjoyed my c-section and for any future children I definitely plan to have another. I’m not even going to entertain the idea of a VBAC.

It's major surgery, I was terrified about having one. Also recovery etc.

It’s a lot harder and scarier than vaginal birth. The preparation, the needles, the being cut open whilst awake?! And then the recovery is a lot harder too, to the point of not being able to drive for a few weeks or be able to lift your baby for a while. I mean I take my hat off to anyone who has had one but I don’t understand why anyone would consciously choose one if they can have a vaginal birth.

I had emergency abdominal surgery two years ago and the recovery was hell. I couldn’t imagine doing that again with a baby as well. And being cut open while awake really freaks me out 😅

It’s better for your baby — they get healthy microbes from passing through the birth canal, whereas the first bacteria a baby comes into contact with after a c-section is skin bacteria and possibly hospital bacteria. Babies born vaginally have better health outcomes for years down the road.

Same, when I started telling people I was having an elective C-section people would make faces and comments here and there.

I'd say do what feels best for you because I found myself at a point where I'm second guessing my choice but I realized it's only because of what other people say or think and that's not good.

I had to have a C section and ended up with a massive internal hemorrhage and required massive transfusion protocol. I lost over half my blood. I was in the hospital receiving transfusions for 5 days and couldn't hold or feed my baby. It took over 3 months for me to be able to walk to my mailbox without running out of energy. There are absolutely serious risks to C sections.

There is no other major surgery where you are expected to care for another person by default after it while you’re taking oxycodone and having a massive hormone crash and painfully engorged from lactating.

Look up the surgery video on that.

It’s a major surgery. In a normal pregnancy and birth it only adds the possibility of complications, which can be life threatening. A vaginal birth is not a medical event, it’s an event monitored by medical professionals in case it becomes a medical emergency. To reduce overall maternal mortality c-sections should only be performed when necessary (in the case of an emergency or when vaginal birth wouldn’t be safe). It also increases the risk during future pregnancies and births (minority, but nevertheless) and recovery is harder. It’s recovering from major surgery and caring for a newborn at the same time. A lot of time you can’t go up/down stairs or carry anything over a few pounds. Sometimes not even your own baby.

No shame here but i will tell you it is terrifying. I had an emergency c section after 32 hours of labor and was so afraid. They literally cut you open while you’re awake. Also, I’m a MRSA carrier… so i was on a shit load of antibiotics afterwards and worried about getting MRSA in my incision.

I couldn’t walk or shower or even sit up by myself for 4 days. I didn’t hold my baby for 5 days. I wish i didn’t need the c section.

I’ve seen a lot of people take weeks and weeks to recover from one. Even when I tore badly after a vaginal delivery I was totally fine in a week. My second and third I was literally fine immediately. Like up and walking the neighborhood two days later feeling great. Plus, I would be so scared being awake and cut open or being asleep and missing baby’s first few minutes would also be sad.

As a nurse, I see people who recover really well from both delivery ways and people who struggle with both delivery ways. That being said, naturally most people heal faster from a V delivery. That being said I’ve also seen countless of CSections and they are a BRUTAL surgery, they literally cut through every layer of skin and then physically rip your muscles apart, then cut your uterus open and rip your baby out, which in some cases can also cause respiratory issues with baby (not being squeezed through the birth canal to get fluid out of their lungs, this can also happen in a rapid V delivery)

i had an emergency c following my baby being in distress after 24 hr of labor, recovery was okay but definitely still had major surgery that involved difficulty with movement, standing, laying down, etc…. second baby wanted VBAC all the way and so happy i was able to have straight forward vaginal birth.. recovery was SO much easier, i would go for vaginal delivery over cesarean any day

A surprisingly high number of ob/gyns would elect to have a c-section themselves so they can’t be all bad. Source: https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lancet/article/PIIS0140-6736(05)71484-7/fulltext71484-7/fulltext)

Personally I don’t think there’s a clear ”best choice” for every person. I’ve had friends who had amazing vaginal births, even for really big 10 lb babies! I’ve also had friends, and including myself, who had horribly traumatic vaginal births that required long recovery times. I was induced, in labor for 30 hours, had 3rd degree tearing, stayed in hospital for 3 nights, and it took me I want to say 4 months to feel “normal” — and I feel lucky as I didn’t have any permanent damage from my tear. It was honestly the worst experience of my life, and to this day the baggage from that makes me tear up sometimes. I will say none of my friends who had planned c-sections seemed to have a bad experience. Some rave about it. My next baby will be bigger than my prev one, and I’ll be older and less healthy, so with all the risks of that I will elect a c-section (not exactly an easy decision still).

The stats point to the vast majority of vaginal births being safe, with easier recovery. The problem is you don’t know what you’ll end up with… could be great, could be awful (long labor and then c-section). So I see the value in someone choosing a more predictable outcome with a planned c-section… of course there are risks there too but they are quite low. The risks of 3rd-4th degree tearing are higher for people of certain ethnicities so that’s also a consideration.

About the shaming: The sad part of my traumatic first birth is, I originally wanted a planned c-section and my doctor was supportive but I felt a lot of social pressure to have a vaginal birth (and of course I couldn’t predict if it would work out or not). Obviously it didn’t end up great for me, but a part of me is still glad I went through that just so I wouldn’t feel as much shame for electing for a c-section next time around. Wish that wasn’t the case but it does get to you.

Your body was designed to give birth vaginally. You should only have a c-section if you can’t or if you and your baby have a medical emergency.

C-section is a major surgery, the recovery is pretty long and the risk of infection is also higher. After having your baby you need to have a lot of strength, which you don't have after a surgery. The recovery with vaginal birth is much faster (I had stitches after delivering and was already walking couple of hours after that). There are many reasons to give birth via c-section and no one should shame you to take this decision, I think you are more brave to choose a c-section that a vaginal delivery!

I had a c-section with my first due to low fluid and baby being breech at 36 weeks. It was a semi-urgent c-section so it was alla whirlwind. I had a pretty textbook physical recovery however mentally I really struggled. I also still struggle with numbness at my scar and my belly is lopsided so I still have effects to this day 6 years later. With my second I had a spontaneous labor and vbac. I was up moving and doing things way faster (honestly faster than I should have been but I felt way better in comparison so it was hard to limit myself). I had a 2nd degree tear and 5 months pp I can barely feel the scar. As someone who has been through both I would 100% prefer a vaginal birth again vs having another c-section.

People have different experiences, very individual ones. C section and vaginal birth are options. With both you can have a hard time, with both you can have “easy” birth and recovery. You decide for yourself, and listen to your own body and intuition - the only relevant thing.

Also some people think that the best way is their way, doesn’t have to do anything with reality in general.

There is important bacteria that’s transferred through the vaginal canal to help the baby’s immune system — that’s a core reason I’m hoping for vaginal - but no shame to anyone!!