I'm not very good at speaking up for myself... or communicating in general and expressing myself. As a people pleaser, I excel at putting myself the last. + I have slow awareness (of what is happening and how I feel about it). So only after thinking about a situation that had passed do I realise how angry I am about it. Sometimes I feel anger or discomfort in the moment but I ignore it bc I hate acting while my feelings are riled up. If I do I tend to be very impulsive and regret everything and feel extremely guilty afterwards. So not acting in the moment is a good thing. I saw a post here about violent thoughts. Sadly, ive been getting them lately. But I'm learning to speak up for myself and express my discomfort, hurt, disappointment etc. So, any tips on overcoming this?
I am right there with you in regard to being a people pleaser. Especially in a professional context. However, if you are getting violent thoughts, I think its time for something to change. Be that talking to superior or letting the person know what they are doing is really affecting you. If neither of those is an option, I reccomend (if its an option) to squeeze all of their fruit and vegetables until they get soft and covered in bruises. Embrace the passive aggresive approach and lay out an endless trail of the most minor frustrations.
A series of unfortunate events if you will.