I picture a car, USSR brand. Driver window open. A man in a military uniform lying under it, flat on his stomach, face on the tarmac. Inside the car, a black clothed, masked FSB agent. The man on the ground, face still in the dirt, lifts his finger and mumbles into the ground (in Russian): "Booooring!"
I have nothing good to say about the Russian petro oligarchy but at least in Russia even the higher ups can get touched. Whether it's falling out of windows, or a billionaire oil oligarch deciding to kill his family and commit suicide with multiple gunshots to the head while on vacation. Anyone aside from Putin can be touched. In US or gulf states the oligarchs seem to be nearly immune. Imagine Trump and Elon fallout would have been like Russia. Elon and his many children and baby mamas would have all of a sudden been very clumsy around heights.
Right is defenestration too much to ask for Russia? It’s been your bread and butter for years, stick to it dammit, why take a leap of faith on an untested method?
Hard to tell with those high ranking officials... Basically everyone is your enemy - Ukrainian operatives, Russian partisan groups, your own superiors and even just regular Russians who probably hate you for being a corrupt thieving asshole (since that's the only way to become a high ranking official in putin's government).
You know how many Russians died in the battle of stalingrad? 1.2 MILLION. Whether that scene in the movie is historically accurate or not, if 1.2 million people die in a single battle, I'd say that qualifies them as cannon fodder.
More than a million German and Axis soldiers combined also died in the battle of Stalingrad, yet nobody said German are using human waves or using cannon fodder.
He must've gone against Voldemort. I'd love to know what drugs he and american Mussolini are being given because neither should still be alive and kicking.
This guy had been avoiding windows for months, thinking he was so smart.
Cars have windows too. That was his mistake.
Should’ve been a submarine general. No windows.
Russian subs can sink and get stuck at the bottom of the ocean
Super safe from windows down there
r/Linux gang where u at
Still fighting the GNU wars.
Bill Gates has left the chat
Submersible: "Would you like to chat with Copilot about this?"
Oceangate thought the same thing!
In fact, it’s kind of what they are known for.
Just throw the submarine out a window duh
Submarines can fall off ledges though.
I hear the Russian's have screen doors on theirs
Russian Arctic subs have windows.
Shhh that ruins my joke
I picture a car, USSR brand. Driver window open. A man in a military uniform lying under it, flat on his stomach, face on the tarmac. Inside the car, a black clothed, masked FSB agent. The man on the ground, face still in the dirt, lifts his finger and mumbles into the ground (in Russian): "Booooring!"
Today I Realized why Russians use Linux
He now has his own window
And a widow.
I have nothing good to say about the Russian petro oligarchy but at least in Russia even the higher ups can get touched. Whether it's falling out of windows, or a billionaire oil oligarch deciding to kill his family and commit suicide with multiple gunshots to the head while on vacation. Anyone aside from Putin can be touched. In US or gulf states the oligarchs seem to be nearly immune. Imagine Trump and Elon fallout would have been like Russia. Elon and his many children and baby mamas would have all of a sudden been very clumsy around heights.
In Gulf states they are almost one and the same.
MBS showed the Oliglarchs can be touched though when he rounded people up, put them in the ritz, and stole their business
Stairs too
Michael Peterson liked this
Should have switched to Linux much earlier
But he could not avoid that delicious spicy tea.
Bro never left the first floor.
Right is defenestration too much to ask for Russia? It’s been your bread and butter for years, stick to it dammit, why take a leap of faith on an untested method?
Generals will continue to be killed until morale improves
Imagine achieving the rank of general, and still having to ride in a fucking Kia Sorento.
This was an act of mercy on Ukraine's part, if you ask me.
Are you sure it wasn't Putin?
I think this looks bad for Russia, they would probably off a general more discreetly rather than make it look like their enemy did it.
That's a valid point. He'd just be summoned to a meeting that he wouldn't return from.
If its is crazy, stupid and inefficient, it was probably done by the Russian government.
It could even have been internal Russian partisans. Not all Russians are placidly letting Putin's reign happen to them.
That particular general failed to fulfill Putin's war quotas for men and material, so yeah... sounds like it was Putin.
Comrades do not let comrades drive Kias
Putin's more of a window guy. This was IN Moscow. If it was Putin, sending him out a window would have been easier than setting up a bomb.
He wasn't defenestrated so it can't be putin
And in a plain white colour too, you know he didn't buy any of the optional extras
Imagine if you got a juke ?
At least it wasn’t a Russian car. Those are real pieces of shit.
Good to see that the Russians are still working on their space program
Two days ago was the anniversary of the first Spanish "astronaut", they wanted to celebrate it too. A little bit late, but better than nothing
It's otherwise shut with the destruction of their only human rated launch facility and the extinction of tanks equipped with an exposed autoloader.
Russia seems to have killed more Russians than any other country 🤔
It has always been a Russian tradition!
As is tradition.
Yeag I don’t think this was Russia..
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He probably didn't follow Putins instructions!
Hard to tell with those high ranking officials... Basically everyone is your enemy - Ukrainian operatives, Russian partisan groups, your own superiors and even just regular Russians who probably hate you for being a corrupt thieving asshole (since that's the only way to become a high ranking official in putin's government).
"Command and Conquer: Red Alert"s soviet storyline is a lot closer to reality than what I imagined.
"This guy made it to sPaaAAaCcE" - Tim Curry, probably
He's Russian, could just be natural causes.
Seasonal car bombing. It's that time of the war.
or an Ukrainian operation. But let's not question the how, let's just be happy it happened!
I like your style, results only. This kids got upper management written all over them.
He beat Putin at monopoly.
So this is in fact on the low end of responses
Putin's squads make use of windows and Novichok. Probably Ukraine.
Those people usually fall out of windows. Just saying
Really hard to fit a car through a regular window.
Das war ein Befehl!
He probably didn't say "gesundheit" after Putin sneezed.
So happy for him. Couldn't have happened to a more deserving person.
Just in time for Christmas too.
Russians celebrate Christmas on January 7th
Eh, close enough.
“You’ve been promoted… to hell”
I’m picturing a Ukrainian operative and Putin’s lackey locking eyes as they reach under the same car, from opposite sides, to place separate bombs…
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Russia has to be running out of russians by now.
Turns out there's so many of them, it's Russian tradition to just send them out onto the battlefield without rifles as cannon fodder
Apparently that part of Enemy at The Gates scene was mostly fictional. The Russians that did not get rifles were handed out PPSh sub machine guns.
You know how many Russians died in the battle of stalingrad? 1.2 MILLION. Whether that scene in the movie is historically accurate or not, if 1.2 million people die in a single battle, I'd say that qualifies them as cannon fodder.
Maybe read a book or two about that “single battle” that was one probably one of the top 10 important moments of the twentieth century.
More than a million German and Axis soldiers combined also died in the battle of Stalingrad, yet nobody said German are using human waves or using cannon fodder.
Russia has apparently suffered a million casualties in the war so far (or more if you ask the Ukrainians) and although those obviously aren't all deaths, TBH I'm genuinely curious how many casualties it would take before Russian society fails to compensate. I mean, even last year the birth rate was dangerously low, and since then the Kremlin has started scraping the bottom of the barrel for ideas. At what point does it start turning into a visible humanitarian crisis in Russia?
They’ve got plenty of North Koreans and braindead Americans to pick up the slack
Usually they just accidentally fall out of windows
Accidental car bombs can be just as dangerous!
After shooting themselves in the back of the head with their hands tied behind their backs.
Wonder which side got him?
Isn't it wild that you see a story like this and you really don't know?
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Who is claiming responsibility Russia or Ukraine?
That car was just 2 days away from retirement.
Didn't some damning data recently drop on Russian troop losses?
Russian officials really need to invest in garages with locks. This happens way too often.
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They send normal soldiers to their deaths all the time, only fair they get hit too
He told him "he can go have sex with himself"
The world is truly healing after taint and paul got their heads bashed in
Oh no! Anyway, good news about the Dacia Sandero!
The higher your rank, the higher your chances of death in the workplace.
On a positive note, someone just got promoted.
Badaboom motherfucker!
Suicide by car bomb. For good measure he probably also shot himself in the back of the head several times after the explosion to make sure.
It's not unreasonable to assume this means someone higher up was not happy with his performance.
falling out of windows isn't the only performance review russian officials receive.
Imagine being a general and driving a Kia.
Car bomb, Must have been bored of throwing people out of windows.
Must have been the wind...
He failed Putty for the last time.
Who possibly could have done this?
What a mystery!
Clearly a suicide - Putin.
Веселого Різдва, відпочивай у сечі
It’s either a window or car bomb, pick your choice
Who has killed more Russian generals, Putin or Ukraine?
A car bomb? Was that before or after he fell out of a window?
It’s this or jumping out from window. He chose KIA
In the Russian government it’s called retirement
Tough to be the insurers in Russia these days lol
Bro didn't have can-do attitude
He must've gone against Voldemort. I'd love to know what drugs he and american Mussolini are being given because neither should still be alive and kicking.