Maybe ask for an experience that you’ve been wanting to have — see a play, go spelunking, whatever floats your boat! No clutter, and the best part is you get to do something fun together.

Consumables - steak, lobster, crab cakes, salmon, cheese, shrimp, hot sauce, salsa, jam, nuts, wine/alcohol, coffee, tea

Professional Services - acupuncture, massage, laser hair removal, haircut, pedicure, house cleaning, knife sharpening, curbside glass or composting, grocery delivery

Amateur services  - coupon book for household responsibilities or privileges

Digital services - password manager, streaming service, budgeting apps, to do or organizer app, digital games

Journalism  - local news, national news, magazines

Experiences - tickets to a show, zoo membership, museum admission, theme park tickets, hotel stay, restaurant gift cards

Charitable giving

Boring things that are still helpful- Toothbrushes, bougie floss, face wash, sunscreen, a replacement for your rattiest kitchen implement, new socks/underwear, cleaning supplies, or any other household goods you routinely use up. 

Every year my husband buys me a year subscription of kindle unlimited!

items of comfort or watmth? upgrades? i just replaced the liner of my slippers and i feel happy every time I put them on. maybe some heavy duty warm gloves? maybe he could plan a date night and wrap the items needed (for example, one time my husband and I did a painting night and another night we tried wood carving. they are little kits).

i would definitely say experiences! maybe there’s a concert you want to go to, or a sports game, maybe a spa day to relax, or you want to get your nails done or hair done! maybe a membership to somewhere you’ve been wanting to try like a pilates studio or art studio. and if it isn’t your thing then maybe just ask him for something you’ve needed to restock on like your favorite skincare or makeup product, or a new pajama or a new pair of sneakers! hope this helps🥹❤️

Do you need upgrades for anything? New video card in your PC? Bluetooth earbuds so you don't have to deal with cords?

How about a couples thing, like a spa date for 2? Cooking lessons for 2? Tandem skydiving? Horseback riding?

Is there a particular food you absolutely love but he hates, you could request that? Or an entire meal of it? Maybe you guys don't eat out often or if you can afford it, eat out super fancy - a Michelin Star, if you can swing it, as a date experience.

My ex-husband and I were champs at giving something with giving nothing and one of our faves was, as we never had kids and no family were close by, was to volunteer at the homeless shelter on Christmas Day and serve food. We'd put our silly dollar store Santa hats on and spend the day with people who couldn't afford the socks on their feet and helped them feel like they're loved and in a warm place before they have to go back out where the world is celebrating a holiday with family.

Doing something like that puts the world in perspective pretty damned fast.

We both worked really good jobs, so we'd find people and pay for their Christmas shopping at Walmart or something. Our fave target were single woman and single men who were between about 45 and 60, with no kids. They're one demographic that pretty much every social program doesn't help. They have way less access to things like social housing and extra food because they don't have a spouse and they don't have kids.

There's just so many ways to do presents that doesn't require an actual physical thing or the physical thing can be useful.

Consumables are a great option for me. Things you like but the fancier option that you wouldn’t have on the regular. Could be anything coffee beans, dark chocolate to make up.

Gift card for the kindle?

Any hobbies you’d think you might like? A few bits to get you started and try them could be good also.

Ask for a vacation or a weekend trip.

I love my Kindle but I would looooove a paper book, too. I always donate them to my library afterwards.

Another person said upgrades, which is an excellent idea. For me, I would hope that my partner thought of a home for the original item.

I (53f) tell my husband that part of the gift is him figuring something out on his own. I refuse to take on that mental load. I don't need anything.

We've been married for a long time -- he knows me really well. He can figure it out. Obviously some things would be better than others, but whatever he gets me, I don't get upset. I mostly want him to actually put some thought into it all by himself.

I did tell him I could use another Yeti travel coffee mug. Then he wanted me to choose a color. Nope -- you can do that part.

Never underestimate a fantastic pair of pajamas and slippers. Imagine cuddling up with a good book with that!

Also think about upgrades. Sure I don’t NEED new bedding but do I WANT super soft, aesthetically pleasing sheets? YES!

My fiancé got me the mop and fancy double bucket I wanted for Christmas this year and I’m super happy! It takes something I do all the time and makes it EASIER for me.

Or like others have said - a night out? A massage? Workout class? A full service house clean? There cannot be NOTHING you’re not a little interested in.

Instead of gifting things, maybe an experience instead? Do a book-making class together, or take a trip together, wine-tasting event? Think of gifting experiences instead of things.

Consumables are a good minimalist gift. Candles, special snacks, gourmet coffees or teas, fancy toiletries. Lottery tickets? 

It's hard to be specific because I'm not your husband, but maybe something precious and personal like nicely framed photos. He could even do an experience gift of a photoshoot and then a physical gift of the framed photos.

Whatever he decides I wish you both a Merry Christmas!

Restaurant gift cards are fun - especially a place you don’t normally eat at or have been wanting to try.

Ugh, it is not your responsibility to come up with a Christmas list. This takes all the fun out of it. If you tell someone what to buy you, it’s not special, might as well just go get it yourself. A few things I’d love to get would be a nice robe, new towels, a couple things for the kitchen (pasta attachment for my kitchenaid, tortilla press, thermometer), anything for my dog, candles, soap, gift cards to experiences (pottery class, local plays).

Cookbook inspired by your diet. Silk pillowcase Fancy ingredients for food, a fancy oil of sorts Update the photos in the house

Do you have/time to replace :

Glass Tupperware? Cast iron pan? A favourite reusable bag? Cutting boards? Knife sharpener? Reusable papertowel?

Basic toiletries / skin care?

A digital photo frame- one that connects to an app so you can share photos with family members/ friends and have it displayed wherever you want around your home

I love to go to a restaurant that I haven’t tried.

Tickets to a comedy club, pandadrum, a sunrise style alarm clock, archery classes, other.

Maybe a donation to one or some of your favorite charities. Or just tell him to put whatever he'd spend into the retirement fund.

Watch Oh. What. Fun. It goes a little to far the other way, but it makes some good points about reshaping give-and-take as we mature.

Agree not to give gifts to each other this year, and instead to put together a small list of things you can do for each other to make the winter holidays less upsetting and worrying. What are the holiday chores you are tired of doing? What are the holiday chores he is tired of doing? Trade.

Maybe agree to pool your time & energy to give a gift to a family shelter. Maybe the shelter needs a day of repairs & maintenance, or maybe a new appliance like a clothes washer & dryer. Do that together.

Then if you both miss giving and receiving gifts, make a pact not to buy anything for yourselves in 2026, so you will both have a list a few things you would like to have bought for yourselves.

I ask for expensive consumables

This was me this year with my wife. I ended up asking for socks and underwear, a ticket to see one of my favorite authors speak in Feb, and a metal Casio watch that will last me many, many years (getting away from wearing my fitness watch all the time, and my other analog watch is earth tones, so this will add another option to my wardrobe).

Helllo

He can get you an experience try something new like kayaking horseback riding or going to a concert. I myself prefer the experience over a gift

Tickets to something, nice wine, coffee, bath stuff, kindle gift card, toiletries,

He should buy stocks for you, or a gold coin from Costco.

Spa day!

Are you the kind of person who would enjoy a spa day? Or sometime in flotation tank? Or maybe some great winter boots that are very cozy?

I ask for socks. If you like some keep them and donate the rest somewhere local such as pregnancy resource center, domestic violence shelter, food bank, homeless shelter etc. most shelters/help centers will be able to distribute socks. Or mittens/gloves. Something flexible enough that you could regift or donate to just about anyone in need and nobody is too hurt if you didn’t keep the gift, plus if you keep 5 or keep 20 nobody is keeping track to notice if you use them. Towels/wash cloths are also a good one. My family likes to give tangible gifts but one can only use so many pj pants and lotions so I’ve taken to requesting small easy things that nobody cares to track if you kept or not. 

If you don't need anything. Have him donate to a local animal shelter in your name. They always need help.

sorry, but it sounds like you have bought everyone else gifts and now your partner is demanding you also buy yourself a gift so he doesn’t have to do any work

Sorry for my ignorance but what is Xmas?

Diamond earrings, a Lola blanket, Uggs, a Dyson hair wrap/ dryer. Luxurious face cream or perfume. Ask for something you wouldn't spurge on yourself. Sometimes it's so hard to spend money on ourselves, especially when it's a pricy item.

Gurl, there's so much to do and see and taste yet, you're too young to be acting like there's just nothing for you for Christmas that he can do or give to you. Are you depressed? If you are or aren't sure you need a spa day.