Responding to Supergirl fanart: "I find myself wondering how her super-coochie functions."
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  • 193 points peacedetski

    https://preview.redd.it/fw6hsnwy787g1.jpeg?width=850&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ecb1e522f629fa649079085b0889bae3d1019485

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    96 points OrbitOfSaturnsMoons
    1. Your flair gave me fucking whiplash and gallstones

    2. What is this referencing?

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    63 points Rigaudon21

    The Superman And Lois animated TV show that came out a while back. Those look like the characters for Superman and supergirl

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    56 points AsymmetricPanda

    1) same 2) the love interests of Superman and supergirl (My Adventures with Superman - very cute show) being injured from intercourse and high fiving about it while the kryptonians are embarrassed in the back

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    8 points WASTELAND_RAVEN

    I work hard šŸ˜“ šŸ’Ŗ 🄵

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    13 points Nukalixir

    The mods here like to take things we say sarcastically, ironically, or as insults to the neckbeards, and branding us with our own words as flares.

    I think I got off relatively easily. I was roasting a neckbeard with hentai decals on his car, not mockingly parroting the rhetoric of a pedophile.

    As for your second point, that's fan art of "My Adventures with Superman". An animated adaptation of the Superman mythos that for some reason airs on Cartoon Network's Adult Swim despite being rated PG.

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    3 points jeefyjeef

    I enjoy when subs do that, but man it would be a curl of the monkey paw to get a flair like that

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    5 points Sweet_Detective_

    The image is of Lois Lane and Jimmy Olsen who are both injured from having sex with Clark (Lois) and Kara (Jimmy) due to Clark and Kara having super-strength and durability which is bound to accidentally hurt someone during sex, they are high-fiving because they are in the same situation and likely think it was worth it / awesome

    I hope my flair checks out here.

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    22 points MalonePostponed

    https://preview.redd.it/pggw2nzdq87g1.jpeg?width=736&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c3cc34ec8c262e471c1b4c11a223f2a5859af16f

    The flair has Lord Mittens concerned.

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    3 points Major-Promotion7079

    https://preview.redd.it/085pu3w7s97g1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4f261c79e1b33b6fd407834fb46d447c4121e496

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    1 points paradiso1997

    https://preview.redd.it/3zd97zgt6c7g1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2dd6facaa459751ca1e61f8ee0c9e34689b75175

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    3 points srottydoesntknow

    https://preview.redd.it/llrwh7s4md7g1.jpeg?width=1124&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=042af58a590f1ed1e565f79a74be86700a26f2a2

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    6 points williamonster

    https://preview.redd.it/laai5yx0gc7g1.png?width=1034&format=png&auto=webp&s=5f20fc2f810b7e6dd6c1626ed4f0a970cb8e8298

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  • 97 points Ark-addicted-punk

    probably super strong like the rest of her?

    still a weird ass question but it feels like these people forget vaginas are in fact part of female anatomy and thus have stuff like musculature? given how kryptonians are identical to humans at least outwardly i doubt its different

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    49 points doubleapowpow

    Its weird to think it would vibrate or anything out of the ordinary, considering no one talks about the abilities of superman's dick.

    But, it is weird that he has xray vision, laser beam eyes, and can somehow disobey gravity by floating.

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    52 points Zpalq

    Lol, I've seen many lengthy arguments about Superman's dick.

    My favorite two are;

    "would he even be able to feel anything from sex? Like, a bullet will bounce off his eye, and he'd feel nothing, there's no way he'd get anything out of sex"

    Or the other one, "would Supermans orgasm be lethal to anyone caught in the blast?"

    I think someone did the math on how fast he can move, applied it to his cum and determined that his splooge would knock down cities or something

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    31 points Ronin1

    People have talked about this for literal decades. It was a talking point in Mallrats.

    "Do you think Louis' fallopian tubes could handle his Kryptonian sperm? I guarantee he blows a load like a shotgun through her back. The only way he can bang regular chicks is with a kryptonite condom. But that would kill him"

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    10 points ELMUNECODETACOMA

    "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex" - essay on the subject written by Larry Niven in 1969.

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    11 points JohnnyCharles

    A man can’t control the force of his jizz though. Superman cries like a normal human, his tears don’t shoot out of his eyes like bullets. His baby batter would probably be the same way.

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    6 points Ark-addicted-punk

    kryptonians are still animals. alien animals, but they still do whats necessary to continue the species. the level of force needed to push splooge out a dick is about the same as their lookalikes in humans probably. if you REALLY wanna get weird, cause of the super strength in her legs and the surrounding muscles, super girl's hole would have an UNREASONABLE amount of strength, and a male kryptonian would have a proportionately resilient dick to enter

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    16 points Sweet_Detective_

    no one talks about the abilities of superman's dick.

    Maybe you don't

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    2 points Erebraw

    There are several famous pop culture conversations about Superman’s dick. Mallrats probably being the most famous.

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    1 points PurpleGspot

    She has speed feats that say she could minorly flex and and relax the muscles fast enough it'd feel akin to vibrations.

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  • 30 points Atheizm

    It's like this but what's appropriate for Supergirl.

    https://preview.redd.it/ir0mvbwto87g1.jpeg?width=385&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0ce2c57302c3bbddca43f14c20e8e36672f7f076

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    2 points Adorable_Room1760

    https://preview.redd.it/yqwa7hlfg69g1.jpeg?width=320&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3d922fe993a735afeb34beadd444a8aca86f9660

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  • 70 points MattBurr86

    this guy asking the tough questions over here!

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  • 24 points ClownShoeNinja

    Did she fly down to Springfield for that Duff beer, or is that available in Metropolis as well?

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  • 18 points turalyawn

    My biggest question is why is she drinking Duff. Does this imply Duff Dry and Lady Duff also exist in the DC universe?

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    1 points SquirrelGirlVA

    Mine is what's going on with the back half of the skirt. What's pressing against it for it to lay against the skin like that? It's not the thigh, as her legs don't appear to be pressing against the skin. It should just be hanging straight down.

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    1 points Standard-Company-194

    What's more, Kryptonians can actually taste the difference

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  • 33 points PointsOfXP

    I mean it is a fair question. Would you get dick cancer? Could you even penetrate or is it locked off? What about Superman's dick? Does his jizz shoot out like a lazer? If he cums in someone does it just shoot out their head and kill them?

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    7 points allgamer101

    https://youtu.be/YQd6CYA6RAY?si=H7BSimCeGol5_K_F this should answer your question

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    6 points srottydoesntknow

    Haven't clicked it, already know

    Clearly not his first time, so you gotta ask how he figured it out, especially with the amnesia thing

    ETA: disappointed, it was not what I thought it was

    ETA2: what I thought it was

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    7 points StarConsumate

    I think his spunk was radioactive or something

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    23 points JTtheLAR

    That was actually Spiderman. He gave Mary Jane cancer in one comic. Because Spiderman writers are fucking weird.

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    14 points StarConsumate

    I think he gives Lois cancer in ā€œman of steel, woman of Kleenexā€ which is the weirdest title on the planet.

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    2 points JTtheLAR

    That is so darkly hilarious.

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    3 points BrozedDrake

    To be fair that comic was a "what is the worst possible future that could happen" type alternate universe story.

    People bringing up the "he gave her cancer with his spidey splodge" thing tend not to give that context.

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    2 points JTtheLAR

    Its still something that was written and illustrated and put into a comic book that was mass distributed. The context that it was an alternate universe doesnt change much in the realm of comic books.

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    -1 points BrozedDrake

    The context that this is specifically a WORST POSSIBLE FUTURE.

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    4 points scorchedarcher

    Wasn't that Spiderman? P sure he gave MJ cancer

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    2 points PointsOfXP

    Damn, don't get bukkaked by Superman.

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    6 points StarConsumate

    The Larry Niven Story: "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex" The Premise: Niven scientifically (and morbidly) explored the implications of Superman and Lois Lane having children, concluding that Kryptonian sperm, supercharged by the sun, would be too powerful for human biology. The Outcome: Niven suggested the sperm would essentially cause cancer or explode within Lois, making reproduction impossible without extreme, perhaps fictional, containment or genetic manipulation. Key Takeaway: It highlights the inherent biological conflict between a Kryptonian's solar-powered physiology and human limits, making a "super-sperm" scenario dangerous.

    Also spiderman too for some reason. Not kink shaming. Just kink asking why?

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    3 points PointsOfXP

    I love how in this make believe world with an alien that has superpowers and fights crazy ass bitches has a subplot about it being impossible for him to have kids without serious issues. I'm guessing he has a human looking dick at least. You think with him coming up with new, one use powers on the fly he could make it work

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    3 points StarConsumate

    I guess it could be further broken down to even weirder hypotheticals. I’m not sure how it works at all honestly but what if he got a vasectomy? Like is the actual sperm cells the issue? Or is it the seminal fluid? If the swimmers weren’t present maybe he could have a normal sex life without the abilities to have kids. Fuckin weirdest monkeys paw type shit. I’m gonna go wash my hands and my frontal lobe.

    Edit: his vans deferens is probably harder to snip than steel so might have to get an angle grinder vasectomy?

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    5 points PointsOfXP

    Is there a scalpel sharp enough to give Superman a vasectomy? Someone invent the time machine already. I need to ask the Superman guy what's up

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    4 points ununseptimus

    Just perform the operation in red sunlight, or get Zatanna or Doctor Fate to provide an enchanted scalpel.

    Although once he's back under yellow sunlight he'd probably heal up and inadvertently undo the effects of the procedure.

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    3 points StarConsumate

    The horrific but hilarious image I got in my head of doctors just using increasingly more durable power tools to snip his baby batter tube

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    3 points Xalterai

    Nah, there was a scene where Superman performed brain surgery through his cornea on himself using a mirror and his laser vision. So just give Supes a complex series of mirrors to redirect his laser vision from his eyes to his nutsack, so he can laser snip his semen spewers and it's problem solved. Hell, the heat would automatically cauterize his scrotum on top of it all, so he wouldn't even need to worry about bleeding.

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  • 6 points christopher1393

    https://preview.redd.it/ahhqhrxlgc7g1.jpeg?width=403&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=41a390170e5422f489f3bf797d37e1b6c3868b73

    I think this picture of Melissa Benoist, who played Supergirl in the tv show is highly relevant to that comment.

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  • 5 points The_Raven_Paradox

    Look, I’m not a weirdo or an incel, though will admit to a bit of Anissa thirsting—but would you be killed as a mere human male having sex with a supergirl? I think it might be a legitimate question.

    I would kill myself if I ever used the phrase super-coochie

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    1 points Stardewchickenman

    I mean another commenter posted about how she'd basically have gorilla grip down there and yeah, I think I'm gonna find someone to perform a lobotomy on me for that sentence structure alone šŸ˜µā€šŸ’«

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  • 4 points MildlySpastic

    My guy woke up and decided to ask all the wrong questions

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  • 3 points RobinTheReanimator

    To be fair, a ton of people have made the same joke with superman. There was even a scene in Hitchcock dedicated to that.

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  • 4 points zenon10

    why is she wearing pants on her arms?

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    3 points VulcanCookies

    She's wearing a coat shrugged off her shoulder, you can see it behind her and on the other sideĀ 

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  • 2 points ThatGumnutGuy

    Oh hey, its Duff Beer!

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  • 2 points SheZowRaisedByWolves

    Semi-related: there was this Japanese visual literature where this orc woman chose a mate after conquering a village and demonstrated what would happen if he turned her down by putting a club up her vagina and squeezing it hard enough to look like a pencil

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  • 2 points Optimal_Trifle_2384

    I mean it doesn't strike as an innocent question, and does seem like a veiled sexist take.

    But the more I read it, the more I ponder, the more curious I get. Superman knows control because he's been with humans for long. Can't say the same about Supergirl.

    But James Gunn would be more than happy to answer questions like these.

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  • 2 points Chris_Bs_Knees

    Two words: Laser Pussy

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  • 1 points Honey-and-Venom

    God damnit.....

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  • 1 points thelast3musketeer

    I think it’s interesting she has a simpsons universe beer, unless they make duff beer

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  • 1 points BluetheNerd

    So in most depictions of Superman and Supergirl bullets bounce off them without effect, like they don't even feel them right? The bullets don't even depress they skin like a finger pressing against a normal person. Stands to reason then that unless they're banging another kryptonian they are not gonna feel a single thing. In fact even if they were into you, unless you had like a kryptonite condom I doubt you'd actually be able to penetrate right? It would be like slamming your knob against a steel wall and expecting it to open.

    That said however I know how horny comic book artists can be, so it would not surprise me if this has already been canonically proven false.

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    1 points gkn_112

    But there are also many depictions of them softly kissing a person, this should be impossible and they should feel like kissing a granite statue. That means they can either soften up or harden up at will, or its some other mechanic stopping fast objects. Like the surface tension of water making you SPLAT if you jump from too high but a baby can hang in its feet without problem.

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  • 1 points donotgotoroom237

    I remember reading a couple of old comics where she had a regular human boyfriend and Speedy, so I guess it's okay?

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  • 1 points Blurgas

    I'm kind of surprised she can even get drunk, or it is because she hadn't grown up under a yellow sun like Clark?

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    2 points Desecr8or

    Both Superman and Supergirl lose their powers if they're exposed to red sunlight.

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  • 1 points ElegantCoach4066

    https://preview.redd.it/gfwr6ffhdl7g1.png?width=246&format=png&auto=webp&s=a00dceb702cf46e2ede155b3b324401a8f15d19f

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  • 1 points ZombieLebowski

    That brings the mind to superman does his load go off like a shotgun blast? Would he child kick through Lois if she was out in the sun

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  • 1 points Charm_deAnjou

    Lasers cocks off of annoying neckbeards. It's a wonderful super power!

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  • 1 points Demi_Blacksand

    Dimwitdog is the artist I think.

    No I'm not going to explain why I know that artist. Whats with all the questions?! Are you a fucking cop?!

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  • -4 points kenobrien73

    Just gross, comic fandom toxicity.

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    3 points WhoAmIEven2

    Gross, maybe? Toxic? How on earth?

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    -4 points kenobrien73

    Did u see the comments here? Toxic masculinity permeates the hobby. As a comic collector, the cringe factor is a perfect, graded 10.

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    5 points WhoAmIEven2

    Toxic masculinity is fantasising about sleeping with fiction characters?

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    0 points kenobrien73

    Goon away

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