my dad (57) was diagnosed with t2 diabetes 2 years ago. at the time he was out of the country & hid this information from me & my sister. he got back, broke the news, and changed his diet by the littlest amount & started taking prescribed medication. he had lost a lot of weight at the time.
he struggles mostly with high blood sugar. as of recent he has started to say he feels dizzy after meals. this alarmed me & I decided to voice my concerns. i’ve made sure he’s drinking more water than usual, and make him fruit bowls & salads when I get the chance.
my mother has fed him the idea that he can eat whatever he wants as long as it’s in moderation & I just feel like there’s more to it than that.
I knows it scares him & it scares me too. i’m worried he’ll have a heart attack while he’s at work all alone. or it’ll just catch up to him because none of us really have the resources to help. I just want to know what the best course of action is? what are some things we can do. what should we be regularly checking? my dad hates having his blood sugar taken but i’m thinking about getting on him about being better about that.
I just don’t know what to be checking for or how, what exactly he should be eating. he refuses to see a doctor regularly because we just can’t afford it sadly. i’d also love to hear some reassuring stories if possible, I feel kinda hopeless because I just love my dad so much.
If he hates having his blood sugar checked (which I completely understand — finger pricks are awful), he might want to consider a CGM and share the data with you and your mother. That would give everyone a much clearer picture of what’s actually going on.
One thing I’m curious about: when you say his blood sugar is high, how high is it typically? Has he shared his A1C numbers with either of you?
I was diagnosed with an extremely high A1C — so high that the first test actually maxed out and had to be repeated. My first successful measurement was 16.2%. Today, my A1C is a normal 5.4%. I’ve experienced nearly the full spectrum of what diabetes can look like, thankfully without most long-term complications — though I did sustain some kidney damage before I knew what was happening.
The reason I ask about A1C is because it makes a huge difference in treatment and day-to-day life. I was on insulin when my A1C was between 13–16%, and gradually tapered off it as I came down into the 7–13% range. Early on, my diet was extremely strict — essentially protein-only at first, then around 40 grams of carbohydrates per day. Later, I could handle about 60–80 grams per day. Now that my A1C is normal, I can eat much more normally because my body is responding to carbohydrates more normally again.
A lot of people are probably going to focus on all the bad things that can happen if your father doesn’t get this under control. I just want to add that it’s not all doom and gloom. It is possible for him to return to a healthier, less restrictive diet — but it will be really hard at first. If he puts in the effort, though, it can pay real dividends in the long run
You should be very worried and learn about T2, it’s 50% carb control (fruit is typically high = bad); 25% exercise and 25% meds. Weight loss says his sugar is dangerously high.
A nutritionist told me fruit is ok because the sugar in them is digested slowly due to fiber.
It really depends on the fruit and also the person. Your kind of have to test for yourself what you can tolerate. Like if I have a banana, it's my only carb source in a meal because it definitely raises my blood sugar, but I could have potatoes with dinner and an apple for dessert if I wanted to, and raspberries hardly move my blood sugar at all.
Bananas and grapes are worse.
Berries are great.
I can tolerate most fruits, but I had to get my sugar down to an acceptable level and then experiment fruit by fruit to figure it out. A person with uncontrolled diabetes doesn't have the luxury of just tucking into a bowl of mixed fruit as a meal.
Depends on where a person is in their journey. 3 years ago, the tiniest bit of pineapple or a half an orange would have caused me to have to run on a treadmill to get below 200. Now I can eat a bowl of pineapple and not spike over 150.
It will depend on how bad your diabetes is too. It’s light years better than chocolate cookies though.
He is going to have to take proper ownership of changing his lifestyle. It's a massive massive thing believe me... but it can be done and should be done. He should study and learn everything he can and take all the steps without shortcuts... it has worked for me... so far... in just 6 months I have reversed my numbers and fixed me metabolism significantly... but I'll always be t2d and if I eat anything with carbs my numbers still go high Eg 9 peaks... but I clear the peak quickly and return to baseline within a couple of hours.
Exercise is important after every meal. I decided to eat less than 10g carb per meal... lost a lot of weight and got my a1c down to 5.1 from 10.3. Feels good to know you are not damaging your body any more. Worth doing if he wants to live longer!?
Mounjaro was a complete game changer for me, whereas metformin didn’t do much. But he has to want to get healthy. Mounjaro gave me the ability to do other things needed, and stick with them (things my doctor recommended, such as losing excess fat, eating better, exercising).
Fruit in general is bad for t2 diabetics. too much sugar. I had a smol greenish banana recently to see how it would interact with my blood sugar and it went up to 12 mmol.
My advice is veggies. Half his meal should be veggies. My doctor told me that fish is best, then turkey, then chicken in that order of best meats to get protein. I boil eggs to pack for my lunches too. Ideally, he should consume less than 20g of sugar per day and almost never eat bread. A proper sourdough or wholegrain bread is ok in restrictive moderation (for me), but sprouted grain bread is great because its super high in fibre (Ezekiel bread). Low carb. no sugar. artificial sweeteners are fine. In fact artificial sweeteners are pretty amazing imo. Hope this helps.
The most important thing is knowledge. Good solid knowledge and data. Use only proper regulated sites to gain that understanding. Diabetes UK is a good one or whatever the equivalent is in your country. A good understanding of what sugar things contain. Your gifts of fruit might not be the best thing, I find just a single apple can (and does) send my blood sugar up a lot. Avoid very processed foods and if you must use them, scrutinise the nutrition information to see the quantity of sugars and carbs.
It is near impossible to control diabetes properly without monitoring blood sugar. Finger pricking is a cheap and easy way but is limited data. By far the best is a CGM which gives information updated every minute. Using that you can check to see the effect of different foods and also different quantities. The concept of in moderation, does work but it is knowing what that means and it is different for every single person.
I’m really sorry you’re carrying all of this. Reading your post, it’s obvious how much you love your dad — and that fear you’re feeling is very real.
First thing I want to say: you’re not overreacting. Dizziness after meals in someone with T2 usually points to post-meal blood sugar spikes or crashes, and that’s something worth paying attention to. It doesn’t automatically mean something terrible is about to happen, but it is a signal.
About the “eat whatever in moderation” idea — that advice gets thrown around a lot, but honestly it’s way too vague for diabetes. For many people with T2, what they eat matters just as much as how much. Big carb-heavy meals (even “normal” ones) can cause sharp spikes that make people feel dizzy, flushed, weak, or unwell afterward.
A few realistic, low-cost things that can actually help:
Smaller meals, fewer big carb loads at once
Pairing carbs with protein and fat (so blood sugar rises slower)
Drinking water like you’re already encouraging (you’re doing great there)
Even light walking after meals if he’s willing
About checking blood sugar: I know he hates it, but honestly, numbers are information, not judgment. Even checking occasionally (especially when he feels dizzy) can help you understand what’s happening. You don’t need perfection — just patterns.
Personal experience only: my family dealt with something similar, and one thing that helped when doctor visits weren’t frequent was adding 6GlukFine as a support supplement. It’s not a replacement for meds or medical care, but it helped smooth out post-meal spikes and made those dizzy, “off” feelings happen less often. It gave us some sense of control when resources were limited.
Also — reassurance matters:
Many people live long, full lives with type 2 diabetes, especially when someone like you is looking out for them. This isn’t hopeless. It’s scary, yes, but it’s manageable, even imperfectly.
You mother isn't wrong about moderation, but it's ideal to get the numbers in line first, the weight, the routines, to relearn what the body feels like with normal blood sugar levels so that you can tell when you start to get too high or low. Best thing is cut down the carbs, at least to 100 grams a day, exercise, just a simple walk for 20 to 30 minutes after eating is a good way to keep blood sugars in line, keeping the higher carbs for breakfast or lunch because a lot can be burned off through the day, either running errands or while working. Biggest thing is to make sure he realizes that it's manageable if steps are taken, and have him google for images of what happens to people who try to ignore and get neuropathy, amputations, etc. It's all about seriousness of diet and exercise.
My sister did real good when she was first diagnosed. Then eventually she started eating whatever she wanted & said she’d just take a shot of insulin. Not good on the kidneys. She ended up getting cellulitis on her side & it ended up eating like a hole in her side & she had a wound vac but it didn’t help. She ended up having kidney failure & a calaflaxis. I can’t spell. She ended up dying in 21 at 59 years old. She spent the last 4 months of her life in hospitals.
So yeah this is probably not how he wants to end up. If he FAFO’s out well it won’t end will. I’m sorry if I’m too blunt but I’ve seen it experienced it & just offering my 0.2$; though I guess it’s 5 cents now. Had to add a little humor. So people it’s better if they are told the possible end result to open their eyes.