I'm a scientist
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  • 3468 points BearDrives

    ... What does this mean about Mt. Rushmore?

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    1530 points Organic-Row9514

    Giants. That closely resemble former presidents. 

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    424 points douxsoumis

    The Illuminati hired guys who looked like the giants and made them presidents to cover up the giants existed.

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    56 points TyraelTheArchangel

    Please don't let flat earthers see this. It will be their next thing to latch on to.

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    3 points Notjustgltrngld

    But the earth is flat! The proof is that I can walk forward. I couldn’t do that on a round surface. 🤓🤣

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    3 points TyraelTheArchangel

    Got me. Can't refute that. /s

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    83 points UltraRoboNinja

    Fucking BRILLIANT!

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    81 points O_J_Shrimpson

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    2 points Dramatic-Amount-5698

    People say LOL all the time. I never laugh audibly at something I’ve read online. This made me LOL

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    18 points Soft_Bridge8795

    You are joking but open up Instagram and there will be at least 5 people who would genuinely take this as a fact

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    15 points AnotherUN91

    I submit Trolls, and direct you to the Netflix Original for proof.

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    4 points Bugout42

    That’s a plausibility.

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    6 points Desperate_Row1189

    Ohhh just like the those mountains that are actually “ancient trees.”

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    14 points Prior-Lab7130

    Like AOT. One day the true founding father will return and set off the second pioneering, wiping the country all but clean of its prior inhabitants.

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    9 points MarlosUnraye

    Manifest Destiny 2: Electric Boogaloo

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    3 points tanstaaflnz

    "all but clean"

    So you mean 'not clean' ?

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    2 points RaevynXD

    Clean but not fully clean

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    3 points bearsheperd

    Have you ever seen those presidents in person? How do you know they ever existed!

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    3 points Haimoimoi

    People were just bigger back then.

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    105 points commanderc7

    Attack on Titan is a historical documentary

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    13 points Scarytoaster1809

    HAVE WE LEARNED NOTHING FROM DISNEY'S HERCULES?

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    13 points joetheplumberman

    I learned I have a thing for brunettes

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    12 points LycanOrNot

    I think we all learned that brother

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    3 points Mekanimal

    I learned I have a thing for Danny Devito as a Satyr.

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    14 points ChaseballBat

    Giants... Dingus..

    You think it's a coincidence we have a football team called the Giants? Yea just so happens we have real names for all the other teams, but then giants are the only ones that ARENT real?

    Wake up.

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    9 points bubbles_maybe

    📢 Rumbling, Rumbling! 🎵🎶

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    10 points Prestigious_Till2597

    Thar's skulls in them thar hills

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    11 points Dragon_Frog_Pond

    He was the scariest president. They had to imprison him in a mountain to end his rampage

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    2 points Eggonioni

    Washington, Washington. 6 foot 8 weighs a fucking ton.

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    6 points JonathanBadwolf

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    5 points t-earlgrey-hot

    These enormous presidents will devour us all!

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    8 points Temporary-Face1672

    Have you ever watched attack on titan?

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    2 points sourpatch1014

    Omg mizu 5 pfp

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    4 points notsobadmisterfrosty

    We used to elect our biggest and strongest. Remember learning about Abraham Lincoln in school? He was known for the tall hat, his large hands, and being 475 feet tall.

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    3 points Orgasmic_interlude

    Yes, attack on titan is real

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    2 points KK_Rider

    Tiny giants made of tinier giants.

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    2 points gooeydumpling

    Before the faces were carved into the mountain, it’s beauty was unpresidented

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    2 points WumpusFails

    They're not marble, so that doesn't apply.

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    2 points irespectpotatoes

    The mountain just did that, it wasnt man made

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    2 points Fearless-Version9714

    People used to be a little bit bigger than they are today

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  • 1019 points SnooFoxes4389

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  • 233 points EVVOflux

    https://preview.redd.it/h49vp9ng7v6g1.jpeg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a6cfc0d8527a7a9854ab18ea42f241153c20a505

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    29 points Own_City_1084

    To this day I say “I SCIENTIST, YOU SCIENTIST. SCIENCE!” when my kid talks about science class. Nobody gets it though 

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    31 points Sir_Sir_ExcuseMe_Sir

    Omg someone beat me to it, I love this sub sometimes 

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    6 points RemarkableStatement5

    I don't get the reference

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    12 points TheJLLNinja

    It’s a reference to this skit.

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    4 points RemarkableStatement5

    Thank you

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  • 1972 points Capable_Cockroach_19

    Guys guys guys… but they’re a scientist

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    285 points Xyeeyx

    https://i.redd.it/301azlrx7v6g1.gif

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    2 points twenty-threenineteen

    The hell is this from lmao

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    2 points ppmanahahah69420

    Dumb and Dumber.

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    65 points Dull_Investigator358

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    57 points TheChickenIsFkinRaw

    ...in social sciences

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    19 points DetectiveTrickyCad

    Art history is a social science, I suppose. Pretty sure this guy is not an art historian. Or a geologist—casting marble?

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    13 points qorbexl

    ....because they've tried and failed at being social, several times

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    13 points spektre

    (more on x.com)

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  • 1296 points TanningOnMars

    I mean, thats technically a massive compliment to the artist

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    431 points napstablook12

    He’s discrediting their work (I’m a artist)

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    229 points Raphael-dh

    The maker is dead (I'm alive)

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    66 points SnooCompliments8967

    They's not just dead—they're no longer living (I'm an LLM)

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    6 points weggles91

    I'm an LLM too, but here that means a postgrad law degree 🤷‍♂️

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    14 points MyBatmanUnderoos

    Nah, he’s just an idiot (I’m an idiot).

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    3 points ohnaurrrrr5

    Can confirm )I'm an stupid dumbass)

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    19 points NickRick

    he's attempting to. but he's actually telling everyone it's so life like he got fooled.

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    4 points MaximusSydney

    About time these guys got some recognition!

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  • 277 points Hykarusis

    Casted marble?

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    306 points beautybeliever

    maybe if they took an art class instead of flunking through a “scientist” degree they would understand what the difference between marble and clay with joists is

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    72 points NarrMaster

    And an english class to know the past tense of "cast" is "cast"

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    27 points AdreKiseque

    You do see "casted" once in a while but it's nonstandard and, to my ear, kinda grating lol

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    25 points Pablo_Diablo

    It's not just nonstandard, it's incorrect. 'Casted' is not a word in the English language except idiomatically colloquially, and any time it's used, a Grammar Angel loses their wings...

    Edit - apparently casted is a past tense formation of caste (see below), which is probably a rare use case in general.

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    21 points bumbletowne

    I hate that I know this because of HR but casted is a term that refers to past tense classification of caste. I live in America but have A LOT of Indian coworkers being shitty to one another.

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    4 points Pablo_Diablo

    Interesting.  TIL.

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    12 points AdreKiseque

    'Casted' is not a word in the English language except idiomatically

    ...sorry is that not the definition of a word being used and thus not incorrect?

    Anyway, Wiktionary has "casted" listed as a past tense of "cast", with the note "common, but sometimes proscribed". Which checks out with how I've heard it used.

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    11 points Cerxi

    You don't understand! It's not a real word, it's just a thing people say! /s

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    4 points sillyslime89

    This makes me nonplussed

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    3 points MisterSplu

    Funny, I use cast as past tense for casting concrete and casted as past tense for casting an actor, but I guess I was wrong

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    2 points Dry-Chance-9473

    Wait, Scientology doesn't make you a real scientist?

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    3 points 12-idiotas

    The “ancient lost technology” of cast marble s/

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  • 943 points EricCartoonBox

    If it were part of the lower arm, wouldn't it have two bones (the radius and ulna)?

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    1088 points Valturia

    Do you doubt a scientist?

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    95 points Substantial_Moneys

    Only exclusively

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    27 points Convillious

    Harvard PhD over here

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    12 points 0xB4BE

    He did his own research!

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    134 points crclOv9

    Unless you’re a scientist shut up.

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    47 points Life-Ad-3726

    I'm not a scientist but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express one time.

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    70 points CrossP

    If they were a bunch of fucking corpses instead of marble, then minor damage would have made this obvious CENTURIES ago. Unless of course the all-powerful sneople kept burying the secret every time it got out. Except for this heroic scientist!

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    21 points HulksInvinciblePants

    Also, that would mean everyone in this era was jacked

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    13 points Any_Barracuda_8422

    clearly these are victims of gorgons

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    4 points CrossP

    I think the thousands of scholars would've noticed if the statues had fucking fingerprints

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    2 points Paradox

    sneople

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    24 points giver_of_realness

    that's literally not the lower part of the arm

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    8 points BartOseku

    Its past the elbow, regardless there should have been 2 bones

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    4 points Livid-Leather6720

    No, it's above the elbow. It's not the statue in the forefront, whose arm is complete. It's a second one behind it, missing most of it's arm, above the elbow

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  • 1114 points aerosol_aerosmith

    Ah yes my arm also only has one bone

    edit: yes, smartasses the upper arm has one

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    279 points mbanson

    The arm bone

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    178 points RichardBCummintonite

    Is connected to the... Leg bone! I'm something of a doctor myself

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    43 points Objective_Couple7610

    https://i.redd.it/k26ejhjmev6g1.gif

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    2 points Syn0x000

    Surgeon simulator 3000

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    13 points BaltimoreSports0321

    “Science is…whatever we want it to be”

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    18 points [deleted]

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    9 points BaltimoreSports0321

    “Hello, 911? Uhh…diabetes repair I guess…”

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    11 points [deleted]

    You missed the best part of that joke. He actually might have called 411.

    "Is it 411 or 911 in New York?"

    Edit:

    Which is even funnier than how I said it because if he got 911 right his answer to "911 where's the location of your emergency" is "New York" or he was with 411 and giving the right answer to the question "what state?"

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    5 points BaltimoreSports0321

    Lolol, my bad. I love Dr. Spaceman so much. Beyond the 4th wall, Parnell does an amazing job playing the role. He’s so sincere in his delivery, I love it.

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    4 points [deleted]

    He was amazing on the live episode. Like I know they're going for the SNL vibe specifically on the live episode, but he was just like "oh...in the polished regular episodes you're still just the exact same over the top live sketch character" lol. Like there was no difference. Same enunciations, same mannerisms, whereas almost everyone else you can tell it's different for them in front of an audience versus a, as Jenna would say, CAMERAH

    Top five sitcoms ever and I am something of a connoisseur

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    2 points hatethiswebsight

    I'm not a doctor but I do dabble in pharmaceuticals

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    54 points Jabbok32

    To be really smartass about it, in anatomy the 'arm' specifically refers to what you call the upper arm. The, uh, lower arm is correctly called the forearm.

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    6 points aerosol_aerosmith

    Well that's just directionally confused these doctors are a buncha dickheads

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    2 points [deleted]

    Nah they're just hockey players. A forecheck and a back check for example. By this logic the top arm will be called the back arm to avoid confusion going further

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    33 points HARRY_FOR_KING

    That part of the arm? Yeah, it does. The humerus.

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    17 points cheese_bruh

    Quite funny

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    6 points Northbound-Narwhal

    That part of the arm on the sculpture is the forearm, which has 2 bones

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    18 points Mooptiom

    Your upper arm does in fact only have one bone.

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    15 points aerosol_aerosmith

    No duh. This is clearly below the elbow

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    7 points Actual-Bee-402

    Same (I’m a scientist)

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    3 points Atom_101

    That's quite humerus

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  • 118 points LeahIsAwake

    Let's put aside for a second the fact that that's not what the inside of the lower arm looks like. Let's even put aside the fact that marble statues break so easily that if this was what the artists of old were doing, it would be common knowledge centuries ago. If you were going to cheat with cadavers, this isn't the way to go.

    Marble isn't like clay. You can't just slap it on top of a form and have it wrap around that form and take on the shape of it. It's a rock. There's a reason that the traditional tools of marble carving are chisels, not pottery tools.

    Even if you could make a fake "marble" that acted like clay but looked like marble down to the molecular level? You couldn't just slap it on a form and expect to get all the details. You would have to carve those details back into your sculpture.

    Your best bet would be to pose the cadaver and then create a mold. Wait for the mold to set, then remove the cadaver and pour your "marble" and make a cast. Oh, and go ahead and destroy your mold after one use, because if two "sculptures" show up that are completely identical, the gig is up.

    None of this makes any sense if you sit down and think about it for longer than five seconds. This goes beyond even flat earth. This is "the moon is made of cheese" levels of stupidity.

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    27 points Worklurker

    Waitaminute...the moon is made of cheese?! /s

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    10 points breathing_normally

    It’s a natural process, the Milky way churns up cheesy moons all over the firmament

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    5 points The_Pastmaster

    *Pfff* You believe in the MOON? Really?

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    2 points 12-idiotas

    That’s why they don’t allow anyone to return there. The cheese is still curing. /s

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    5 points you_are_wrong_tho

    I think it’s “the jig is up” *

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    8 points 12-idiotas

    The “lost technology“ of ancient marble cast s/

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    3 points willregan

    Obviously you don't believe in science, then.

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  • 45 points LordSeibzehn

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    15 points dainthomas

    Well, he does have PhDs in parapsychology and psychology.

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    9 points LordSeibzehn

    But his theories are the worst kind of popular tripe, his methods are sloppy, and his conclusions are highly questionable.

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  • 77 points Impressive-Koala4742

    Night in the museum plot be like

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  • 21 points DingusaurusU

    Wtf is that massive dong coming into frame from the left?

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    10 points mollusks75

    I think you answered your own question.

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    6 points Excellent_Yak365

    Most likely not a dong and maybe some fabric or something. They weren’t big into large manhoods with these statues because it was considered a negative trait

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    4 points rustyrustrust

    That is a geoduck. This statue is in Malaysia where they are used spiritually.

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    2 points neralily

    casted human dong, duh

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    2 points MacMittens-MeowMeow

    THANK YOU. That’s all I could see in the pic!

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  • 149 points IndividualCurious322

    There are a number of books that actually claim many marble "statues" are merely the petrified remains of people.

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    165 points DrafiMara

    Oh, well if a number of books say it then it's clearly not batshit insane

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    47 points IndividualCurious322

    Not saying its not insane. But I find it funny others also came to the same conclusion.

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    18 points Thick_Basil3589

    Many people came to the conclusion that the Earth is flat

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    6 points Sometimes-funny

    Australians would fall off if it wasn’t

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    8 points VibeComplex

    Always knew they were full of shit

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    32 points yoshi_drinks_tea

    It’s actually a very big compliment. The sculptor did such a great job it made people think it’s a real body.

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    3 points 12-idiotas

    Some of these sculptures are amazing to look up close. Photos or video can’t really capture how they look in real life.

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    11 points Xen235

    Many theories like that about old art and architecture. People today can't comprehend that something can be made without the help of modern technology because they lack the skills that people before had.

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    7 points funnyfaceguy

    Yeah books like the Odyessey

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    13 points RefrigeratorNo1160

    Some statues even contain actual human remains. But I'm gonna guess that's not typical.

    https://www.cnn.com/2015/02/27/asia/mummified-monk-statue

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    12 points Icy-Wishbone22

    Thats ritualistic intent, not artistic pieces

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    7 points Flavahbeast

    yes it is very rare these days (banned during the Meiji restoration 😞)

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    11 points DrDonut

    Can't put corpses in sculptures anymore. Cuz of woke 

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    2 points 12-idiotas

    First they came for the sculptures…

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    5 points 1531C

    Literally impossible, soft tissue can not petrify into marble. Marble is made of quartz, mica, clay minerals, iron oxides, pyrite, and graphite. While it's not totally impossible to petrify soft human tissue it only happens under extremely specific conditions like quick burial by ash in extremely low oxygen environment. Pompie remains are an example of this. However, those soft tissues can only petrify to silica, pyrite, and apatite. Notice the other ingredients of marble are missing from that list. Like 99% of the time soft tissue can only leave an impression while the bones fossilize.

    Marble specifically is only created through a process called metamorphism where limestone is heated under extreme pressure deep in the earths crust. Calcite recrystallizes the already existing crystal structures fusing them together into a much denser stone.

    Also under a microscope "true marble" is identified as former limestone due to those preexisting structures before metamorphism occurs. Fossil marble is also identified this way by the absence of those limestone structures.

    TL:DR nah dawg

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    2 points PeteBabicki

    Pretty sure there was a crap horror movie based on that premise too.

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    2 points IndividualCurious322

    House of wax? Lol

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    2 points PeteBabicki

    That was it! God I sometimes miss those shitty old movies.

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  • 13 points readilyunavailable

    Okay, but why does it look like that? Did it snap off at some point in history and get chipped pereptually?

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    18 points Excellent_Yak365

    If I had to guess, differential weathering. There areas that are white are either bleached out by sun/acid rain and the dark areas are more rough and less weathered showing a truer color of the stone. Alternatively, the dark areas could be some sort of discoloration from bacteria or fungus. Could also just be natural color variation in the stone

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    11 points robbak

    Some statues aren't carved stone, but plastered clay. The clay would be formed around some structure, an armature. This may be what you are seeing - the armature, covered in clay, and then plastered.

    Alternately, it may have been fixed in the past - a hole bored into both pieces, a rod placed to support it, and bonded with an adhesive or mortar.

    As this statue is inside, it is probably fairly new. But I don't recognise it, so I can't tell you where it is.

    Plenty of more likely ungulates to choose before you assume it is a zebra.

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    2 points ScreamingDizzBuster

    I'm guessing it's 19th century and in the Musée d'Orsay.

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    2 points MammothFormal3966

    Looks more Like a statue in the Marly or Puget Courtyard in the Louvre Museum.

    Looks more like the Marly Courtyard and if so these are the original Statues that were in the Gardens of the Marly Domain under the time of Louis the XIV. (It's probably a representation of Neptune)

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  • 37 points Airframe98

    That’s actually calcified lumps of aluminum foil wrapped around the steel wire used as a frame. They were pretttty advanced back then.

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  • 7 points RoosterzX

    A "scientist" that can't research.

    TLDR: The statues we know today are hardly a representation of what they looked like when they were created.

    Long Explaination:

    Most Roman and Greek statues had arms originally and they were often ornately painted. But if you leave a statue in say - a public square, a garden, an arena, or outside a political building - deterioration takes place.

    Not only that, some artists carved the arms separated and attached them onsite because marble is fragile.

    Some statues were vandalized over time as well. Some statues were in cities that were conquered and became damaged. Some people took the pieces of different statues.

    Some statues were vandalized for political or religious reasons. Pope Paul IV ordered all ancient male statues have the genitals removed in the mid 1500s for indecency or immortality. Most of the statues that have fig leaf covered genitals were given the fig leaves by Pope Innocent X and Pope Clement XIII. Pope Pius IX actually had multiple full sculptures destroyed in the mid 1800s for similar reasons.

    The Romans themselves reused statues. Some statues of the emperor's had the heads removed so they could place the head of the new emperor on it.

    What we go to the museum to see today, is far from what the statues looked like at the time of their creation.

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  • 13 points LevelsOfCocaineBrain

    I’m just a tist but that don’t seem correct o mundo.

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  • 7 points QuirkyImage

    Let them explain how one wraps a body in marble 🤔

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    6 points OstrichPossible1815

    Oh you don’t know? They just dip them in molten marble. I’m a marblologist, so that’s how I know LOL!

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  • 7 points MJWhitfield86

    You can tell they’re a scientist because they see one datapoint that matches their hypothesis and immediately declare success.

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    4 points ArchaiusTigris

    Regular people would never understand

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  • 6 points thesitekick

    https://i.redd.it/p8shs4ekiv6g1.gif

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  • 6 points HerotoGaming

    Okay.. so the statute of liberty… oh no..

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  • 6 points Napischu88

    So they had tiny penises for real then. (I'm a penis connoisseur)

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  • 5 points BoticelliBaby

    People are spectacularly dumb

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    5 points BoticelliBaby

    Source: went to classical sculpting school in Europe where you start by making copies of David in your first term

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  • 3 points koopa915

    Me when I mold the clay to a bone to give it structure “I wonder if anyone’s gonna think I’m a psychopath when this cracks open one day”

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  • 4 points Upvotespoodles

    As a non-scientist, I find it amazing they could breed humans so thin and sinewy that when you put them in clay they look like regular humans instead of humans covered in clay.

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  • 4 points AbbotThoth

    Wait, so if the statue of David is a cast then how fuckin' tall was Goliath?

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  • 7 points Spiritual-Credit5488

    Mmm yes let me just cast some lads with my molten marble

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  • 3 points lordlolipop06

    Such an odd cliff to die on

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  • 3 points special_crazy_cat

    Weeping angels 🤓

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  • 3 points x_samsquantch_x

    Rodin worked in a variety of scales because he too faced this accusation. Many of his statues are larger than life, proving it was all sculpted and not cast. 

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  • 2 points cockalorum-smith

    Bro sounds like Mr. Fantastic from New Vegas lol

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  • 2 points TKDbeast

    That’s actually a cool horror concept. An artist serial killer that casts human bodies.

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    2 points Dazedn_confuzzled

    A Bucket of Blood is basically this and it's great (and snippy at like, 60-something minutes long). It was directed by the legendary Roger Corman and it's also hilarious if you like (or hate) Beat culture.

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  • 2 points comdygas

    Doctooor Valturia…

    https://i.redd.it/ffk93ynriv6g1.gif

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    2 points comedyqwertyuiop9

    But the kids love us.

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  • 2 points Illithid_Substances

    Anyone out there who is a scientist (but actually), would you ever introduce yourself as "a scientist" rather than by your field in a serious context?

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  • 2 points Just2063

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  • 2 points LanSotano

    Can you cast marble and have it come out decently?

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  • 2 points actcasuall

    He’s a scientist!

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  • 2 points Equivalent_Grade_352

    I mean I wanted to argue against it but what could I say to a scientist ?

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  • 2 points Nawench

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  • 2 points BookEnvironmental689

    My main field of study was dead body statue physics.

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  • 2 points DaMain-Man

    Ah yes scientist. Like we talking biologist, chemist, astronomer? Just scientist doesn't mean you know what you're talking about

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  • 2 points Interstice_land

    Glad they clarified they were a scientist, now I believe them 100%

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  • 2 points Yakob_Science

    I mean they could very well have used dead bodies to reference while making the statue but thats about it

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  • 2 points Killer_Moons

    The ghoulish truth: Medusa was the artist

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  • 2 points Joelad2k17

    He must think mt rushmore is the decapitated heads of giant presidents.

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  • 2 points moladukes

    I’m a scientist

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  • 2 points stringliterals

    "I KNEW IT [for years] and now I have evidence!" is a the opposite of the scientific method.

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  • 2 points EconomyCorgi727

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  • 2 points TheDonkeyBomber

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  • 2 points goodolewhatever

    I don’t think I’ve ever heard an actual scientist lower themselves to calling themselves a “scientist”. They either specify their field/credentials, or just speak their point lol.

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  • 2 points PuzzleheadedError488

    Why did they take the globe out of classrooms

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  • 3 points CorniusB

    Thats clearly below the elbow and would have the Radius and ulna bones and not just a cartoon one big bone. Trust me im a cartoonist.

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