Maybe I don’t get the joke but I hate it when people say shit like “everyone always leaves me” in relationships because it makes me feel like I’m obligated to be there or else I’m a bad person
You're not wrong but I think the implication is the puritan notion that women with past experiences with men (especially bad experiences) are "damaged"
This meme and your experiences are both examples of different situations. Simply admitting to having trauma shouldn’t be a trigger for your partner to leave you.
And on another hand, people need to be careful about how they phrase some things to their current partners so you don’t end up guilting them into doing something they don’t want to
First the misogynistic way. She was abused or mistreated by her ex's, therefore making her "damaged goods" thus OOOP doesn't want her because she is not "pure".
Second is more so through a saftey lens. You know the person who always says "everyone leaves me" and you feel pity before you figure out exactly why? Or that one guy who all his exs are "crazy bitches"? If the stink follows you everywhere then you have to consider maybe you're the one that needs showering. The implication here is that if she keeps getting into relationship with men who "don't treat her right" then she is lying. And when thr break up inevitably happens you will also become a guy who didn't "treat her right"
It's also definitely possible that she genuinely has only dated assholes before, so leaving just because she said that without any further investigation is pretty damn premature imho
Also, abusive people / predators (not sexual , I just mean emotionally and in their behaviour) are pretty good sniffing out people with weak boundaries and backbones, so the cycle can go on for a while until the person in question either gets very lucky or grows a backbone and gets serious about their standards and boundaries.
I don’t mean this in a judgmental way towards the victim by the way - I’m just being direct with it. The cycle of abuse is hard to escape especially if you’ve been shaped into believing you’re weak or if you have other obligations keeping you there like children
Yeah that's why I included it in the first interoperation
But I will disagree with you there. People SHOULD leave at the first red flag. If your brain tells you "something isn't right" take it seriously. Yes there is a chance you're wrong and seriously hurting somebody who needs love, but while everyone deserves unconditional love you are not required to be the one who gives it. "Oh it's just one red flag" has caused far more abusive relationships than "another person left".
I wouldn't be married right now if I had that attitude, so I gotta say I'm not a fan of the "drop anything that looks like it might be 'damaged goods'" mentality.
I never said drop everything if it's "damaged goods" I said drop everything if it's sending off red flags. What people feel safe around and can cope with is different between Induivuals. It's great that you were able to unconditionally love and support somebody struggling and I'm genuinely happy for you both.
Your tollerenaxe and what makes you feel safe doesn't reflect everybody. And that's okay. Nobody should feel pressured to stay with a person their brain is trying to warn them about because they haven't "given them a chance"
Well, they’re taking it to mean that she’s dated multiple “asshole” kind of guys before, and probably had extensive sexual experience during those relationships, likely including sexual degradation, leaving them far from “pure.” That’s almost certainly what this is referring to.
I've seen memes like this from Instagram and the punchline of the joke is that it's a trope that a woman will say something like this and then disappear the very next day and that the dude is leaving preemptively to avoid the heartbreak.
It is also a trope that a girl saying this means you will get friendzoned for being "too nice" or "I don't wanna lose you".
Imagine growing up in an abusive and neglectful household and finally finding someone you can trust and telling them this and they leave because they assume YOU'RE the abuser.
Fucked up.
Maybe I don’t get the joke but I hate it when people say shit like “everyone always leaves me” in relationships because it makes me feel like I’m obligated to be there or else I’m a bad person
People leave a burning building too. You aren’t obligated to stick around.
You're not wrong but I think the implication is the puritan notion that women with past experiences with men (especially bad experiences) are "damaged"
This has happened with men too. And then you break up and you’re “just like everyone else”
Fuck why is Sett daddy
Thank you twodickhenry
This meme and your experiences are both examples of different situations. Simply admitting to having trauma shouldn’t be a trigger for your partner to leave you.
And on another hand, people need to be careful about how they phrase some things to their current partners so you don’t end up guilting them into doing something they don’t want to
I don't get it
There's 2 ways I interpreted this:
First the misogynistic way. She was abused or mistreated by her ex's, therefore making her "damaged goods" thus OOOP doesn't want her because she is not "pure".
Second is more so through a saftey lens. You know the person who always says "everyone leaves me" and you feel pity before you figure out exactly why? Or that one guy who all his exs are "crazy bitches"? If the stink follows you everywhere then you have to consider maybe you're the one that needs showering. The implication here is that if she keeps getting into relationship with men who "don't treat her right" then she is lying. And when thr break up inevitably happens you will also become a guy who didn't "treat her right"
It's also definitely possible that she genuinely has only dated assholes before, so leaving just because she said that without any further investigation is pretty damn premature imho
Also, abusive people / predators (not sexual , I just mean emotionally and in their behaviour) are pretty good sniffing out people with weak boundaries and backbones, so the cycle can go on for a while until the person in question either gets very lucky or grows a backbone and gets serious about their standards and boundaries.
I don’t mean this in a judgmental way towards the victim by the way - I’m just being direct with it. The cycle of abuse is hard to escape especially if you’ve been shaped into believing you’re weak or if you have other obligations keeping you there like children
Yeah that's why I included it in the first interoperation
But I will disagree with you there. People SHOULD leave at the first red flag. If your brain tells you "something isn't right" take it seriously. Yes there is a chance you're wrong and seriously hurting somebody who needs love, but while everyone deserves unconditional love you are not required to be the one who gives it. "Oh it's just one red flag" has caused far more abusive relationships than "another person left".
I wouldn't be married right now if I had that attitude, so I gotta say I'm not a fan of the "drop anything that looks like it might be 'damaged goods'" mentality.
I never said drop everything if it's "damaged goods" I said drop everything if it's sending off red flags. What people feel safe around and can cope with is different between Induivuals. It's great that you were able to unconditionally love and support somebody struggling and I'm genuinely happy for you both.
Your tollerenaxe and what makes you feel safe doesn't reflect everybody. And that's okay. Nobody should feel pressured to stay with a person their brain is trying to warn them about because they haven't "given them a chance"
Well, they’re taking it to mean that she’s dated multiple “asshole” kind of guys before, and probably had extensive sexual experience during those relationships, likely including sexual degradation, leaving them far from “pure.” That’s almost certainly what this is referring to.
There’s the Third Route, of “I’m here for something casual and not to be your therapist.”
Nope, it's both wrong.
I've seen memes like this from Instagram and the punchline of the joke is that it's a trope that a woman will say something like this and then disappear the very next day and that the dude is leaving preemptively to avoid the heartbreak.
It is also a trope that a girl saying this means you will get friendzoned for being "too nice" or "I don't wanna lose you".
Men who use JJK memes are not to be trusted in general
I just don’t like seeing Riko Amanai after what happened
There's legit a misogynistic rapist character in JJK and most fans claim to hate him and his misogyny, yet go to post this type of bullshit
Who are you referring to? It's been a while since I read JJK. (Is it the weird cult leader guy?)
Naoya Zenin. To be fair, it's not confirmed that he's a rapist, but it is implied. But what is confirmed is that bro is misogynistic beyond belief
What's crazy is people are making thirst edits of him
Ugh glad someone else saw this
Sometimes it feels like people post to those explain the joke subs just to get people to agree and interact with their misogynistic jokes/humor.
Imagine growing up in an abusive and neglectful household and finally finding someone you can trust and telling them this and they leave because they assume YOU'RE the abuser.
Fucked up.