Former Prime Minister John Howard has moved to calm a tense and fractured nation, reassuring Australians that while the current levels of social, cultural and political division may feel unprecedented, he remains available to significantly worsen them at short notice.

In a speech this week, Howard reminded Australians that creating unity is vital during times of national grief, but turning people against each other for political gain is often easier.

“This guy is the master,” one Liberal Party insider noted. “I thought we were already at breaking point. But Howard pops up and says, ‘Stand aside, I’m a professional. I can take us even further apart if needed. I give him two days before he starts suggesting that unity itself is a dangerous, left-wing concept.”

Ironically, Howard himself relied on bipartisanship during Australia’s last horrific massacre, calling on Australians to put politics aside and come together in shared grief, and insisting that national trauma required calm leadership rather than ideological point-scoring. Speaking this week, he confirmed that this principle remains intact, but only for tragedies occurring in 1996.

“He brought people together when it mattered. And now, when it matters much less to him, he’s more than happy to pull them apart again. The guy is just so skilled at this stuff.”