As a white woman who has dated men of other races, it's women, too. Just a lot of racism all around, yet people think nothing of their designer dogs carefully bred to have traits of specific breeds. I'm actually quite bitter about it because the crap I dealt with from people was a huge stressor.
I know it’s not but since I’m a white woman this is what affects me specifically. I know there are also Asian men, Hispanic men, middle eastern men, Indian men, who tell women from their race the same thing about dating black men or dating outside their race in general
I've heard plenty of black men and women say shit like "I would never date outside my race when seeing an interracial couple". Especially in rural areas.
People are surprisingly hateful across the board NGL
I mean if they just don’t want to themselves there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s different than policing who someone else dates which is what this meme is about
I mostly try to go on with my day. Might shoot them a dirty look but it's not worth talking to trash.
If they follow me around I might say or do something for my safety
Racists are not good people, they aren't safe to be around, and you can't expect them to act like normal people. Unfortunately they are everywhere, every race, religion, and gender.
My rule of thumb is that 50% of all people are just total pieces of shit. Is that dude an asshole? Idk, flip a coin
Asian men can be really awful about it. I’m biracial with an Asian mother and have heard disgusting things from Asian men who think they’re entitled to Asian women
Clearly there were guys thinking things like this, but something happened about ten years ago that has emboldened all the worst people to run their mouths without fear
I've said it before, and I'll say it again, but the fact that "grab 'em by the pussy" wasn't a dealbreaker and didn't end his chances of being elected is absolutely disgraceful.
For real. The level of raised bigotry and emboldenment among lowlife men was palpable at the time. And it never went back down to pre-drumpf levels after that.
And the amount of men who, I hencetoforth thought were decent humans, who did a chuckle and said something to the effect of "he should have never said that" (with the unspoken, but loud "but it's ok to say it behind closed doors with no microphones"), was staggering and eye opening.
I am white and my boyfriend is Indian but it doesn't matter that we both hold Canadian passports.
EVERY TIME we go to the U.S. we get separated at customs, disapproving stares, rudeness etc.
It's leaked over into Canada too unfortunately, but the difference is still palpable.
We are going on a cruise next month and I'm kinda dreading being at port in L.A. again.
Especially because in Canada we live in like the most liberal province, B.C. And we are used to older white people especially cooing over what a "sweet young couple" we are and then we cross the boarder and it's just this from multiple people at all times:
Surprisingly Princess Cruises in general seems to attract lovely people. We don't have issues on the ships themselves so we are hooked.
It's known as the more conservative cruise line and it caters to an older crowd but I think it's more people who are conservative about their partying and not necessarily politically conservative lol.
We just knew something like carnival wasn't for us. And there is something nice about being 28 and 30 and being seen as adorable and super young because of the main demographic being 50+ 😅 We stand out in a good way on board!
I, white woman, married an Indian man. I never honestly thought much of it. I grew up in hawaii technically a minority so ive been on the other side of it and growing up i was often attracted to brown boys and didnt find any white boys attractive until I moved to the mainland. From then on ive actually mostly dated non-white men because there didnt seem to be anything odd about it. So when I started getting random DMs about me being some sort of race traitor 5 years ago at first it was so absurd and silly I just laughed. And they call you names like mudshark or something, which again, these insults just dont even hurt or mean anything even a little. At the end of the day my husband and i are both married to a person we like. We're not the sad losers in this scenario. However, that said, what's alarming is the rise of it and im not stupid....some of these people are frothing at the mouth to be violent about it. That's what scares me.
I was told how it was my duty as a white woman to have more white babies. I am also married to a non-white man.
I haven't gotten violent messages about it, but I disabled all options to message me privately because I don't want to bother with cowards who can't say what they want publicly.
My brother only stopped yammering on about how I needed to have white babies to prevent the white race from going extinct right up until I started dating an Asian man. He's now my husband, and by brother hasn't harrased me about having kids once since I've been with him. Guess he doesn't want me having kids anymore 🤷♀️
I've had people say that to me too. Thing is that my husband is white, he just has naturally tanned skin to the point of being racially ambiguous. When he was growing his beard out, some people assumed he was Muslim and refused to interact with him 😐
Oh it definitely is! But it's really given my husband a great perspective on racial discrimination and bias that a white man wouldn't normally get. So he's really been able to use that as an opportunity for his own growth, and has worked on changing other people's opinions on race.
“‘They’ are coming for ‘our women’” is a really old sentiment, but the worst are feeling emboldened these days, and the internet and particularly social media makes their bullshit louder and spread further.
It's been this way for most of human history. Even recently. I'm 33 and biracial. My mom married my dad who is black and the amount of shit we had to hear was annoying. People always find a reason to make you seem like less of a person when they don't feel good enough as one.
Did anyone else’s parents tell them this? Mine were allegedly not racist, but just trying to “protect” me and my sister. So even though they tooooootally didnt have a problem with interracial relationships, they were just trying to kindly give us the heads up that if we ever went on a date with someone of color, we would never date a white guy ever again.
This was my mom. She was fine with us having black friends and even became "mom" to one of my brother's friends when he had nowhere to go; ended up living with us for some years and is still part of our family to this day. But she feels differently about us dating them. And because she has had her own black friends and was generally accepting of our POC friends, she truly believes she's not racist. She would just say, "that's just not what god wants for us (interracial relationships)".
But it's funny, she didn't have an issue with us dating anyone Hispanic. I feel that's because she grew up with her older sister, who she admired, dating a Hispanic guy who she later married and is still with to this day. So she had exposure to that idea early, and therefore felt differently about it. There are so many nonsensical rules that people set like this and don't take the time to ask themselves why they have double standards.
I remember when I was 12, my mom asked me "if a white boy likes you, and a black boy REALLY REALLY likes you, which one should you date?" And I said the black boy and she said no, always date the white boy.
I've been with an Asian man now for about 8 or 9 years and I think her way of coping is by her saying he's "a type of white man" which..... Uh no. She also got his ethnicity wrong for like the first 3 or 4 years we dated. She kept calling him Korean despite me telling her multiple times that he's Vietnamese 🫠
Why do they think this is such an own to a woman already in a happy relationship? It’s like they want her to leave her husband or boyfriend for a white man and they’re trying to use reverse psychology.
I’ve heard them claim that white women who prefer non white men do so because they can’t get white men, it’s such a non sequitur. Who does or doesn’t want to date her wouldn’t affect her personal preferences. Also do non white men have like much lower standards than white men? No I don’t think so
Oh. Is that why they think they'll convince me to leave my spouse? Lol. Even funnier. My first love happened to be quite white. We just didnt work. Its weird how they think white plus white is all you need for relationship success. But yeah I never had strong racial preferences. I looked more for certain features and symmetries that exist in any race just slight variations. I think beautiful men exist in every ethnicity
Same, I think beautiful men exist in every ethnicity. Honestly I have a slight preference for brown and black men but I’m not too picky when it comes to race.
If you’re a white woman with a black boyfriend or husband they’ll tell you “you’re gonna be a single mom” but don’t statistically most white single moms have white kids? Clearly not all relationships between white people work out either and a non zero amount of white men leave their pregnant girlfriends.
Honestly? Ive noticed that a striking number of straight white men don't believe in reproductive rights. So its probably why I haven't dated them as often, more than anything else.
And many say that if a white woman dates a black man, he'll definitely physically abuse her or she'll become a single mother who "ruined her lineage", and she "asked for it" by dating a black man.
I saw a reel making fun of a situation like that and that's what many of the comments were saying. The fact that I found it because a former friend liked that video.
I never see them tell black women not to date black men because of that. Most domestic violence occurs at the hands of same race partners, for black women it’s black men and for white women it’s white men, but they don’t acknowledge that.
They live to "get women" and do stuff in life mostly to get female attention, to get laid and to enter a relationship. They assume it's the same for us. Hence the unsolicited advice like "Men don't like that much make up", "Men don't like long fake nails", "Men don't like [FASHION STATEMENT]", "Men don't care about your education and career", etc.
They think theyre hurting us by telling us we're not reaching our goal (to get male attention). But, here, even worse, were talking about white male attention. The most supreme of all attentions.
Like are they really that dense that they think a woman who already has a boyfriend or a husband cares if other men want to date her? Much less a racist loser like them.
There always seems to be a toxic urge from men for women having dated outside their race. Its quite pathetic as it always seems to stem from jealousy as there is no real logic to it.
I don’t understand why they think it’s such an own to a woman who’s already in a happy relationship. I think they wish she would leave her husband or boyfriend for a white man and they’re trying to use reverse psychology. I also think the vast majority of the men who say this have trouble finding a woman themselves.
Yeah I believe that's the jealousy side, they can't get women because of their toxicities and racism yet believe that they lost the chance to a woman to another race. I'm open to all races and never had an issue, but then again normal...
My guess is they’re most likely having trouble finding a girlfriend and they see a black man with a white girlfriend or wife as a potential girlfriend being “stolen” from them
Exactly, why do they think this is such an own to women already in happy relationships? It’s like they want her to leave her husband for a white man and they’re trying to use reverse psychology
There is also that weird stereotype of black men who date a white woman being looked down on by their family and other black women, who see this as "selling out".
Supposedly, they justify this by saying that some black men who are in relationships with white women tell said women bad things about black women.
I'm a white woman married to a black man and we haven't actually had any comments to our faces the whole 8 or so years we've been living together. We live in pretty liberal places though. We also both don't have much of a social media presence.
Edit: I am absolutely not saying it doesn't happen. Just that I'm the real world I think it happens a lot less than the online world would have you believe. I honestly expected to have encountered it at some point.
It’s mostly people online who say this shit, there was a video of a guy who harassed a BMWF couple in public though and when a white guy defended the couple he said to him “are you Jewish?”
I wish it was just white men who reacted to interracial couples like that
Almost every surviving culture is patriarchal, and men in patriarchal societies tend to feel very entitled to women.
Some indigenous cultures around the world are more egalitarian
As a white woman who has dated men of other races, it's women, too. Just a lot of racism all around, yet people think nothing of their designer dogs carefully bred to have traits of specific breeds. I'm actually quite bitter about it because the crap I dealt with from people was a huge stressor.
I know it’s not but since I’m a white woman this is what affects me specifically. I know there are also Asian men, Hispanic men, middle eastern men, Indian men, who tell women from their race the same thing about dating black men or dating outside their race in general
I've heard plenty of black men and women say shit like "I would never date outside my race when seeing an interracial couple". Especially in rural areas.
People are surprisingly hateful across the board NGL
I mean if they just don’t want to themselves there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s different than policing who someone else dates which is what this meme is about
No they literally say that upon seeing interracial couples. Source: I have been in an interracial relationship for over 7 years
It’s wild that people say this to you. What do you say in response?
“No one cares what you think.”
I mostly try to go on with my day. Might shoot them a dirty look but it's not worth talking to trash.
If they follow me around I might say or do something for my safety
Racists are not good people, they aren't safe to be around, and you can't expect them to act like normal people. Unfortunately they are everywhere, every race, religion, and gender.
My rule of thumb is that 50% of all people are just total pieces of shit. Is that dude an asshole? Idk, flip a coin
Asian men can be really awful about it. I’m biracial with an Asian mother and have heard disgusting things from Asian men who think they’re entitled to Asian women
Yeah, 10-20 years ago on Reddit there was a whole thing from Asian men complaining about AMWF couples and generalizing them
Yes. And am I the only one seeing this rise recently? I pretty sure it wasn’t this much like 5-10 years ago.
And this isn’t limited to white men but all men. I’m brown myself and I’ve gotten nasty comments at me for dating other ethnicities/ races etc.
Clearly there were guys thinking things like this, but something happened about ten years ago that has emboldened all the worst people to run their mouths without fear
My guess is Donald trump being elected in 2016, this gave lots of bigots the license to go mask off. They felt empowered.
And they didn't just feel empowered. They were. (disgustingly)
I've said it before, and I'll say it again, but the fact that "grab 'em by the pussy" wasn't a dealbreaker and didn't end his chances of being elected is absolutely disgraceful.
Wasn't there a presidential candidate who ruined his chances because he mispelt potato? What a time to be alive.
And they canceled another one because he did a funny laugh one time.
For real. The level of raised bigotry and emboldenment among lowlife men was palpable at the time. And it never went back down to pre-drumpf levels after that.
And the amount of men who, I hencetoforth thought were decent humans, who did a chuckle and said something to the effect of "he should have never said that" (with the unspoken, but loud "but it's ok to say it behind closed doors with no microphones"), was staggering and eye opening.
I agree with this.
I am white and my boyfriend is Indian but it doesn't matter that we both hold Canadian passports.
EVERY TIME we go to the U.S. we get separated at customs, disapproving stares, rudeness etc.
It's leaked over into Canada too unfortunately, but the difference is still palpable.
We are going on a cruise next month and I'm kinda dreading being at port in L.A. again.
Especially because in Canada we live in like the most liberal province, B.C. And we are used to older white people especially cooing over what a "sweet young couple" we are and then we cross the boarder and it's just this from multiple people at all times:
Surprisingly Princess Cruises in general seems to attract lovely people. We don't have issues on the ships themselves so we are hooked.
It's known as the more conservative cruise line and it caters to an older crowd but I think it's more people who are conservative about their partying and not necessarily politically conservative lol.
We just knew something like carnival wasn't for us. And there is something nice about being 28 and 30 and being seen as adorable and super young because of the main demographic being 50+ 😅 We stand out in a good way on board!
Before that I feel like I heard it more from dads and grandpas
Most of guys are young, like teenagers to 25, like maybe they never got over their crush dated a black guy in high school instead of them
Or just that successful non-white guys are out there being more successful and marrying “their” women.
Yeah, they’ll say “white guys make more than black guys, if you want a provider don’t date black guys” while being an unemployed basement dweller
Also I’m sure part of it is because of a certain stereotype about black men makes them feel extra insecure
I, white woman, married an Indian man. I never honestly thought much of it. I grew up in hawaii technically a minority so ive been on the other side of it and growing up i was often attracted to brown boys and didnt find any white boys attractive until I moved to the mainland. From then on ive actually mostly dated non-white men because there didnt seem to be anything odd about it. So when I started getting random DMs about me being some sort of race traitor 5 years ago at first it was so absurd and silly I just laughed. And they call you names like mudshark or something, which again, these insults just dont even hurt or mean anything even a little. At the end of the day my husband and i are both married to a person we like. We're not the sad losers in this scenario. However, that said, what's alarming is the rise of it and im not stupid....some of these people are frothing at the mouth to be violent about it. That's what scares me.
I was told how it was my duty as a white woman to have more white babies. I am also married to a non-white man.
I haven't gotten violent messages about it, but I disabled all options to message me privately because I don't want to bother with cowards who can't say what they want publicly.
My brother only stopped yammering on about how I needed to have white babies to prevent the white race from going extinct right up until I started dating an Asian man. He's now my husband, and by brother hasn't harrased me about having kids once since I've been with him. Guess he doesn't want me having kids anymore 🤷♀️
It might not be the healthiest response but I just sat and trolled the last one for an hour until they were *seething. It was a slow shift at work
Tell them if they wanna take this IRL to come through and drop the address for the police department in your capital.
I've had people say that to me too. Thing is that my husband is white, he just has naturally tanned skin to the point of being racially ambiguous. When he was growing his beard out, some people assumed he was Muslim and refused to interact with him 😐
That's fucked
Oh it definitely is! But it's really given my husband a great perspective on racial discrimination and bias that a white man wouldn't normally get. So he's really been able to use that as an opportunity for his own growth, and has worked on changing other people's opinions on race.
At least there's that silver lining. ❤️
I’ve even seen them imply not having white babies as a white person is the same as actively killing white people, talk about bad comparisons
“‘They’ are coming for ‘our women’” is a really old sentiment, but the worst are feeling emboldened these days, and the internet and particularly social media makes their bullshit louder and spread further.
It’s a combination of racism and misogyny
Yeah, it’s concerning when I see guys on instagram espew this bs with their real names
Not recent my parents got a lot of hate for being a mixed couple in the mid 90s they just couldn't post it online.
It's been this way for most of human history. Even recently. I'm 33 and biracial. My mom married my dad who is black and the amount of shit we had to hear was annoying. People always find a reason to make you seem like less of a person when they don't feel good enough as one.
Did anyone else’s parents tell them this? Mine were allegedly not racist, but just trying to “protect” me and my sister. So even though they tooooootally didnt have a problem with interracial relationships, they were just trying to kindly give us the heads up that if we ever went on a date with someone of color, we would never date a white guy ever again.
Thankfully no, but I’m from the south and I knew some white people who’s parents told them not to date black people
This was my mom. She was fine with us having black friends and even became "mom" to one of my brother's friends when he had nowhere to go; ended up living with us for some years and is still part of our family to this day. But she feels differently about us dating them. And because she has had her own black friends and was generally accepting of our POC friends, she truly believes she's not racist. She would just say, "that's just not what god wants for us (interracial relationships)".
But it's funny, she didn't have an issue with us dating anyone Hispanic. I feel that's because she grew up with her older sister, who she admired, dating a Hispanic guy who she later married and is still with to this day. So she had exposure to that idea early, and therefore felt differently about it. There are so many nonsensical rules that people set like this and don't take the time to ask themselves why they have double standards.
I remember when I was 12, my mom asked me "if a white boy likes you, and a black boy REALLY REALLY likes you, which one should you date?" And I said the black boy and she said no, always date the white boy.
I've been with an Asian man now for about 8 or 9 years and I think her way of coping is by her saying he's "a type of white man" which..... Uh no. She also got his ethnicity wrong for like the first 3 or 4 years we dated. She kept calling him Korean despite me telling her multiple times that he's Vietnamese 🫠
Why do they think this is such an own to a woman already in a happy relationship? It’s like they want her to leave her husband or boyfriend for a white man and they’re trying to use reverse psychology.
They literally think the only reason a white woman would date a guy that isn't white is because she hasn't found a white guy to date her yet.
They also view any woman whose been with a PoC as being tainted and less valuable.
I’ve heard them claim that white women who prefer non white men do so because they can’t get white men, it’s such a non sequitur. Who does or doesn’t want to date her wouldn’t affect her personal preferences. Also do non white men have like much lower standards than white men? No I don’t think so
Oh. Is that why they think they'll convince me to leave my spouse? Lol. Even funnier. My first love happened to be quite white. We just didnt work. Its weird how they think white plus white is all you need for relationship success. But yeah I never had strong racial preferences. I looked more for certain features and symmetries that exist in any race just slight variations. I think beautiful men exist in every ethnicity
Same, I think beautiful men exist in every ethnicity. Honestly I have a slight preference for brown and black men but I’m not too picky when it comes to race.
If you’re a white woman with a black boyfriend or husband they’ll tell you “you’re gonna be a single mom” but don’t statistically most white single moms have white kids? Clearly not all relationships between white people work out either and a non zero amount of white men leave their pregnant girlfriends.
Honestly? Ive noticed that a striking number of straight white men don't believe in reproductive rights. So its probably why I haven't dated them as often, more than anything else.
I wouldn’t say that’s a race specific thing
Ive met too many white Christian conservatives in particular perhaps
And many say that if a white woman dates a black man, he'll definitely physically abuse her or she'll become a single mother who "ruined her lineage", and she "asked for it" by dating a black man.
I saw a reel making fun of a situation like that and that's what many of the comments were saying. The fact that I found it because a former friend liked that video.
They’re incels who fantasize about violence against women, that’s why
I never see them tell black women not to date black men because of that. Most domestic violence occurs at the hands of same race partners, for black women it’s black men and for white women it’s white men, but they don’t acknowledge that.
If anything it’s probably projection because they can’t find any girl to date them
Racists are very stupid people.
True
They live to "get women" and do stuff in life mostly to get female attention, to get laid and to enter a relationship. They assume it's the same for us. Hence the unsolicited advice like "Men don't like that much make up", "Men don't like long fake nails", "Men don't like [FASHION STATEMENT]", "Men don't care about your education and career", etc.
They think theyre hurting us by telling us we're not reaching our goal (to get male attention). But, here, even worse, were talking about white male attention. The most supreme of all attentions.
Like are they really that dense that they think a woman who already has a boyfriend or a husband cares if other men want to date her? Much less a racist loser like them.
There always seems to be a toxic urge from men for women having dated outside their race. Its quite pathetic as it always seems to stem from jealousy as there is no real logic to it.
I don’t understand why they think it’s such an own to a woman who’s already in a happy relationship. I think they wish she would leave her husband or boyfriend for a white man and they’re trying to use reverse psychology. I also think the vast majority of the men who say this have trouble finding a woman themselves.
Yeah I believe that's the jealousy side, they can't get women because of their toxicities and racism yet believe that they lost the chance to a woman to another race. I'm open to all races and never had an issue, but then again normal...
Also I’m sure a certain stereotype about black men makes these racist losers feel extra insecure
Losers watch too much porn and let it drive their opinion of reality sadly.
Anyone who cares needs to get a life tbh. Why are you mad? It doesn’t even affect you!
My guess is they’re most likely having trouble finding a girlfriend and they see a black man with a white girlfriend or wife as a potential girlfriend being “stolen” from them
If she's already married why would that matter. And even if she wasn't why would that matter. The lack of logic is huge.
Exactly, i think when they say that stuff they want her to leave her black husband for a white man and they’re using reverse psychology.
"I already have a husband, why tf would I want anyone else to want me?"
Exactly, why do they think this is such an own to women already in happy relationships? It’s like they want her to leave her husband for a white man and they’re trying to use reverse psychology
There is also that weird stereotype of black men who date a white woman being looked down on by their family and other black women, who see this as "selling out". Supposedly, they justify this by saying that some black men who are in relationships with white women tell said women bad things about black women.
How accurate is that stereotype?
I'm a black woman and I have experienced this. Not always, but it's real and it happens. However, this is not a place to pit women against women.
I’d say in the vast majority of cases it’s not. Also not all parents care if their kids date outside their race.
I'm a white woman married to a black man and we haven't actually had any comments to our faces the whole 8 or so years we've been living together. We live in pretty liberal places though. We also both don't have much of a social media presence.
Edit: I am absolutely not saying it doesn't happen. Just that I'm the real world I think it happens a lot less than the online world would have you believe. I honestly expected to have encountered it at some point.
It’s mostly people online who say this shit, there was a video of a guy who harassed a BMWF couple in public though and when a white guy defended the couple he said to him “are you Jewish?”