I dont think anyone's problems are too small. we all go through struggles as humans, and everyone's lives are so vastly different. what one person might be going through may seem small, but it's their world and there's no way of telling how it affects them. all this to say, whatever problems you're going through are valid, and I hope you have someone to talk you through it without feeling like it's insignificant

Belive me, if you have intentions to kill yourself - there's definitely something wrong enough. It's just not the conventional and habitual reasons, and more hidden, unnoticeable ones, those that you didn’t even think about as reasons. Some people suffer of their experience more directly: through psychological trauma, chronic pain, mental disorders and memories. And some, like me and probably you suffer from from it on a more subtle level: you don't necessarily have to constantly suffer for such intentions. Sometimes it's about how your upbringing, your environment, the content you consumed, and even the slightest, unnoticeable influences are screwing you from within. It might be less about pain than about dissatisfaction with life, a lack of activity, a lack of will to live, a lack of enthusiasm, and most importantly, laziness, a hopeless laziness not just in matters, but in life itself. And this suffering is also a valid reason for such thoughts. Sometimes it's even worse, because in such cases, even the idea of ​​suicide doesn't help much; you don't get rid of some itch, you simply essentially become even less passionate about life, closer to full-blown decline. I know how it feels, at least i think I know. It feels like you want to take your own life for nothing, like there's something fundamentally wrong with you, so much so that even when you've supposedly been "given everything," you've still somehow screwed it all up. But that's not true, for you, it's not true; even with a mountain of opportunity before you, countless open doors, you still feel hopeless. From the outside, and even from your own perspective, it looks like you're simply lazy, passive, but it feels like you're locked in an invisible box, like a mime