Today I (27F) experienced my first sub drop and I don’t know how to navigate my feelings and emotions after the drop.

To give a little background information, my dom (30M) is one of my closest people in my life, no we’re not in a romantic relationship but, we do have a dom/sub relationship. We both have our own separate lives therefore we can’t always be together BUT, always make time for each other. The times we are together we just have to be mindful of timelines cause we both have other priorities that come up. It’s never been an issue or problem for either of us. And we’ve learned how to come up with a dynamic that works perfectly for us. He is just so amazing to me and has helped me brace that side of me. He always puts my needs and wants first, gives the best aftercare, and just loves taking care of me so much. This has honestly been one of the healthiest relationships I’ve been in and I couldn’t be more appreciative of him. He’s also helped healed parts of me that were damaged by a previous relationship that was just a simple romantic relationship and he’s continuously helping me heal with other parts of my life. And from what he has said I’ve been able to help him with certainly experiences and things that he needed to heal from, from his past. So all and all our relationship has been healthy and healing for the both of us.

To kinda explained what happened, after my dom and I had finished our time together I heard his phone alarm go off meaning he had to leave soon, which isn’t the first time that this has happened, but I was so deep into my space that it just triggered feelings of sadness knowing he couldn’t stay longer. He did the best he could to provide me with as much aftercare as he could and was trying to help me come out of my drop. But I was just so upset and emotional that I felt I was fighting that side of me cause I’ve heard of the issues a sub drop could cause. I also was feeling absolutely horrible that I had dropped as he needed to leave cause I didn’t want it to come across selfish like I was trying to keep him there. After I got a better feeling on some of my feelings and emotions we talked it out and I felt like he handled the situation so well. He reassured that I didn’t do anything wrong (I constantly worry about that and overthink it all the time) he made me feel safe and heard as I was explaining why I think I dropped. He’s been constantly checking up on me and just giving me little bits of reassurance that I absolutely love.

Now the issue I’m facing is I feel like I’m in this weird in between of my sub side and normal me. I still feel very emotional and vulnerable which isn’t normal for me, I still feel so sad and I feel like my sub side is just there. I usually have a good handle on my persona but, right now I just feel stuck in the middle and I don’t know what to do or handle all of the feelings and emotions that are just bubbling in me. Has anyone else felt like this and how did you handle it?