Hey all! This community is so great, and I find a lot of perspectives from fellow users to be healthy and balanced. Unfortunately, so many Youtube channels are quite toxic in their views of single and dating life, and tend to be on the extremes. Whenever I search for helpful, supportive content around choosing to be single, it's almost all angry, bitter folks who come up in the algorithm. Divorce lawyers, men who had miserable marriages, or people who are jaded around the opposite sex. That being said, does anyone know of some positive, non-sexist encouragement out there about choosing to be single, and perhaps cultivating other types of relationships in life? I'm looking primarily for channels on Youtube, but any other platform would do. As a 39 year old male, I'm starting to settle into single life as a chosen thing, and would love to foster more positive thoughts around this choice without the negativity that prevails in our society.

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  • Relationship status is just one dimension of your life out of thousands. I’ll advise to go out and join some hobby groups like sports, work outs, dancing, acting or anything that interests you. Social media is designed to amplify negativity, so limit exposure until you are able to ground yourself in some hobbies.

  • If you're into reading there is book called Solo by Peter McGraw. He also has a podcast by the same name. Been a while since I listened to it but the book was decent and the few episodes I listened to were also pretty good. I was listening to the podcasts on Audible.

  • Ngl, it frustrates me so much that recipes aren't scaled down for single people that I've thought of doing a kind of cooking youtube just focused on single eating. It drives me nuts when I just want a recipe for a few scones to get me through the week but every recipe has me throwing in 2 cups of sugar and 3 sticks of butter for the ginormous hordes presumed to be sharing space with me.

    i get frustrated by this too. if you start the youtube, drop the channel ! 

  • Craig Wynne and Dr. Bella DePaulo offer positive perspectives on single life, albeit in the written form.

  • I love the Steeds meer Singles podcast. It's dutch and they talk about all aspects of singleness. One of the hosts is in a relationship now, but it's still great. I love how they don't represent singleness as way better or worse than being in a relationship.

  • Yeah it's sooooo awesome to not be tied down now to have to find someone else. I spent three years on a journey after my ex ghosted. Now I have met a few good people off the apps and it's been interesting

    💯 the apps are filled with people who don’t understand how good it feels to be single. The only way we will meet our match is in the wild, unintentionally. After being single for almost 4 yrs, I stopped wanting to be in a relationship. OP, this is the recipe for wanting to be single. Try being single for 4 yrs and see how u feel after that.

  • The Financial Diet may have some videos related to what you’re looking for.

    🧐🤔

  • Good question. I'll have a think on that. I'm more on Ig, and I follow mostly women, not sure I have any men that tote this positivity.

    At our age, unfortunately more people than not have bad experiences under their belts, which is part of the reason that I'm happy to be single - it seemed like suddenly all the men I was meeting were really burnt and unwilling to grow. I want to move forward and not stay stuckin the past. I don't want to be bitter (even if I am at times) and I want to be a better person- for myself.

    ❤️

  • You have more time to think and curate your own personal projects and goals. Write a book. Play 50 games in a year. Paint and draw and junk journal or scrapbook. Run a marathon. Go to the gym. Swim. There are so many other ways to cultivate an identity outside a relationship

  • There's a podcast called solo which I really recommend for this

  • You might have better luck asking this question on the r/bropill sub. Those guys aren't toxic.

  • Shani Silver