Personally it has to do with masturbation in risky places. I tried it once, got away with it, and haven't stopped since. I know there are consequences but I haven't gotten caught yet so it keeps me going at it more. Part of it is the thrill of being caught and knowing it's illegal. I don't want people to see me and I'd be a lot more worried if I was.
I'm more worried in a sense that I try to get off to unsuspecting women around me. Like if I go for a walk and a woman is walking in front of me I'll pull out my penis. I also do it in my car, the beach, hot tub, etc. I don't think I'm an exhibitionist because I'm not directly showing women but maybe voyeurism? I know it's perverted and creepy but I don't know what likely thing I'm dealing with. I know it's not right especially since I'm getting too comfortable. It definitely feels compulsive and adrenaline rush related.
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Don't normalize this and get help while you can
There are very serious consequences to this that can result as becoming a sex offender and prison time. Prison time and living life can be especially hard for criminals with sex offender charges.(Violence from inmates, finding work/background checks, Damaging Labels etc)
Seek the help of others and work the program my dude. I don't think a designation or a label should matter here. If you are concerned or worried about your behavior and the repercussions due to compulsive behavior then you need to seek help and SAA can help
But you must be willing to work for it. This thing didnt happen overnight and just as simply it won't be overcome in a night. building a good life is more difficult than destroying one. Please look at going to meetings (check the website for groups) I believe if you're asking it's because you have a desire to break the compulsion and live freely.
I wish for you to be free of your compulsions and I hope you can find peace and sobriety like many in this program do. You are worth it and you are youre greatest champion remember that. You can overcome this
I know you cant diagnose anyone but do you have a clue why I do this or what its called? I was thinking exhibitionist, voyuerism, or simply thrill of it. Understanding and educating myself is half the battle.
Honestly my guy working a program like SAA and the 12 steps will help you understand those things about yourself and why you have compulsive behaviors that you are worried about.
This is a personal journey and I don't want to speak on your experiences, I will however share my hopes and wishes for you.
If you are posting this with hope of change then I wish for you to find that peace and clarity that comes from distancing yourself from those desires. You are the key to your own sanity and safety. Don't throw that away for thrills or desires.
Many of us experience hardship and consequences before we begin seeking change in earnest. Listen to your conscious and I hope that you can make progress and find peace in your mind and body with the time you have. 🙏🙏
This sounds like addiction, I can help you with a sponsor to work the steps :)
I know you can't diagnose me but what does it sound like I am? Its obviously disturbing behavior but I don't know what my behavior is technically. I'm thinking exhbitionist, voyeurism, or just addicted to the thrill of it.
That’s still an addiction, that’s if you can’t stop on your own. Someone can sponsor you through the steps. It really helped me, I’m happy to share my story:)
I can say that those symptoms fall under sex addiction. I encourage you to check out SAA.. But you need to figure that out on your own
I’m a woman and if I saw you doing this and looking at me, I with feel sexually violated and used/taken advantage of. Is knowing that you may make people feel violated and very uncomfortable not enough to make you stop? You might also get yourself beat up.
I found with my compulsive behaviors there was a piece of literature on SAA-recovery.org called The Bubble that so perfectly described what it felt like acting out. I wonder what you think about when you read it?