“these are basically unavoidable aspects of living with someone with schizophrenia” and “it's impossible to not have negative effects…from dealing with a schizophrenic partner, child, or parent, unless they are medicated and stable” really hit home.

I’m having a rough patch with my kid who is just old enough to be out on their own but isn’t at all capable of doing so. They’re also causing the rest of the household issues by being in the house. They’d also like to go off their medication.

I want to say that they need to follow the rules of the house or leave. Even medicated, they’re not doing very well at this, so I can just imagine what going off meds will do. I don’t want to kick them out in the middle of winter when I know I’m basically sending them into homelessness.

So my answer is that as parents (and I assume partners and children too) we’re clearly taking on negative effects and so are the siblings who live in the home or watch us parent from the outside. What’s the alternative here? We ask for resources and help but get platitudes and pushed aside because we’re “handling everything so well” not because we want to but because we have no other options.

Only once we hit rock bottom and can’t take any more (or we get physical harmed) does anyone pay attention…and then they judge or ask why we didn’t ask for help sooner.

I draw the line at physical safety. I no longer welcome unsafe people into my home (regardless of relation). Supportive housing is a good option if possible. It is heart breaking to watch a loved one struggling with the illness and watching how it breaks those in proximity. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.

Sending empathy and light

Honestly, that can be very dependent on the relationship with the person.

I am the daughter, ex-wife, and mother (amongst other less close relationships) to people with schizophrenia. It’s worth saying that I didn’t actually recognize what it was until my son was diagnosed. So maybe I would have approached those other relationships differently had I had the understanding at the time.

But I still would not have done as much for any of them as I have done for my son. I would literally deplete myself physically and emotionally if I knew that it meant that he would be better. It was pretty much a full-time job at one point. I guess you could say luckily I’m on disability so I was able to do that. But it still cost me a lot healthwise.

My child was diagnosed with very early onset childhood schizophrenia when she was 8. (Yes, she won the genetic lottery and is 1 in 40,000. Yes, she was checked for PANDAS many times. Yes, she definitely still has it.)

Anyway, many of us are in ever evolving situations where we will always be helping, supporting, and loving the person no matter what comes. However, I have clearly stated to my older daughter that she is NOT responsible and will never be expected to take on the responsibilities of taking care of her sister. My husband and I are doing everything we can to make sure she will be taken care of when we pass.

Personal opinion in every way just as a disclaimer: I think just like everything else with this horrible disorder it’s person to person based. I don’t agree with chat gpt on a few different levels and I’ll explain them. First and foremost if we as the “families” are going to be a genuine support system we ourselves NEED to be in our own therapy. Depression and anxiety can be caused by absolutely anything, it is not something specifically special only we experience from being caregivers for these individuals, and family can cause both of those things and have absolutely nothing to do with a schizophrenia diagnosis. Insinuating that because of the way they are they are causing us to be anxious/depressed is just going to reinforce the idea that they are indeed a burden to us, and that’s absolutely unfair to them. If we aren’t taking care of ourselves properly, how can we even begin to be a proper support system for them? It is absolutely okay if you as a human cannot provide that kind of support, but it’s important to find someone who can provide that for them, and setting boundaries that are firm. Second, if your family member has cancer, or is paralyzed, and something happens (maybe once in a while, or maybe frequently) more than likely your job would be understanding that you need to take care of that they’re family, and it shouldn’t be any different for this. It’s a lot of communication, and finding the right job that can accommodate this need. Third, no human should be enduring relentless mental/verbal abuse indefinitely? That seems like a no brainer, and that’s where the boundaries come into play again. Having a full system of therapist, general practitioner, social worker, and anything else that might be pertinent too the specific situation. We make the choice every day to care for these individuals with this horrid disorder, and speaking for myself I wouldn’t want to go through what they do ever. It sounds terrifying, isolating, and it is such a grossly stigmatizing disorder that it’s understandable why so many feel utterly defeated when receiving that diagnosis. I am by no means saying to be perfect as a caregiver, and some days are really really hard, but I just try to remember how much harder their day probably is going. Sorry if this feel like a rant, but I feel very deeply that these people deserve dignity, respect, and to be seen as humans (not to suggest or imply anyone thinks differently in this subreddit)

The struggles we all face are staggering. As an aside, I advise not having chats with AI about how to deal with serious mental illness or another person's delusions or behavior. It's fine for compiling reports on certain drugs and treatment results across positive and negative symptoms. Researching and presenting the published literature and studies related to SMI or a particular recommended treatment plan a particular diagnosis or drug efficacy. Research again. It's great at that and my advice is to keep it in that lane. Research and reporting.

For me it comes down to seeing that what the sick individual needs is treatment I try to remain clinical and focus on getting treatment. It is hard to be clinical when it's family. In my case my young son. But his illness forced us time and again to call the police over his violence. Punching holes in the walls, threatening. And the police and ambulance were always kind. He calmed each time police arrived. First few times hospital sent him home. His psychiatrist said he needed hospital. Next time, and it wasn't long, when the police and ambulance took him to hospital I made it clear his psychiatrist has said he needs hospital, everyone we came in contact with we repeated he is in psychosis and requires hospitalization. Many, many more incidents and hospitalizations my son is home and med compliant and the most gentle soul you'd want to meet.

It's a hard road. It's a hard, steep and even crowded it is a lonely road, but treatment and help are there at the end of the road.

The safety of the home and all it's occupants is paramount and must be uncompromising. The home is a safe place, especially for those suffering SMI and the full range of stuff us mortals suffer. It's important, I think we all feel, that it must be made clear that shouting and throwing and acting out is not allowed in the home. Period. Your shouting & antics will bring the police here: we'll have no shouting and such here, say what you have to say in a normal voice.

I hope everyone that needs help but can't see it, everyone in psychosis has at least one person in their corner with them .... advocating for them and finding the path to treatment. Sometimes it goes through the local Court system. Depends where you live

Not too sure about the implication that schizophrenia "inevitably" leads to abuse, mental illness and/or professional harm. I get this might not be the best group to tell this to, but no mental condition makes anyone an abuser and to claim otherwise might contribute to stigma. Plenty of us live semi fulfilling lives without destroying our families, but I digress. This kind of post is why I'm hesitant to get help/support, and I'd go as far as to say thay this kind of post is why so many people (me included, for years) will reject the label despite the evidence. Nobody WANTS this thing, especially when the stigma is so high to this day, and apparently even by family members. Then who can we even go to for help?

I made the most progress with my schizophrenic son by putting up strong boundaries and enforcing them. If he started in on the verbal abuse I put him on a 48 hour "timeout" where his phone calls/messages weren't answered. Amazingly they develop a semblance of control when you don't respond to everything as if it is some emergency.

My mom’s therapist told me basically the same advice chat GPT gave to you.

I cut her off for 2 years but then she ended up being horrifically financially exploited during that time so now I’m back and recently became her legal guardian