Hey gang, new to the subreddit and will hopefully have time to engage with fellow writers! I am in need for advice as I am currently attempting a romance novel.
Of course the rules state there are no stupid questions, but I do feel like this one as it will be made clear why. I am a male, and I am very aware about the stereotype of men writing women and whilst I want to avoid enforcing the stereotype, I know that some of my writing has drifted into some of said stereotypes.
It’s the old career-focused female lead, typical male writer I know, but I have been trying my best to subvert this male writer trope a little, like I have been doing for the rest of the manuscript as I am trying to write a somewhat subversive romance book that tries to stick to the romance tropes. Now, my advice is, can I do this career focused lead justice without making it laughable or should I just can that aspect of her? I don’t do the whole: woman comes home, kicks off her shoes, and drinks in melancholy as she lonely, it’s played out and I personally feel like it reduces the characters to tired stereotypes. TLDR, she is a police officer who whilst career driven, is bored of operating in a small town that stuck in its ways for the sake of a potential promotion. She is “lonely” in the sense of “would be nice to have someone in bed with her” but apart from that, she never dwells on loneliness, she is knows what and she certainly doesn’t need “fixing” (and nor does the male lead in this story, that he is going to do on his own) it is hard to explain, and I do feel her profession is important to the story, I dunno…
I really do want to challenge myself as a writer because I am a romantic at heart and I think I should be able to get someone onto paper. Any advice is welcome and glad to answer questions!
90% of the time, just write a person that happens to be female. Most real differences between men and women are smaller cultural things. The way we joke with each other. What’s expected of us. How we’re treated by others. Etc.
I will say that the lonely cop drinking at home alone is certainly a stereotype but that doesn’t mean you can’t do it. But most of the highly-career oriented women I know (none of whom are cops) don’t recede away. Even working 80hr+ weeks, they still have family commitments to their parents, siblings, or kids, or even just friends that they feel beholden to and will physically exhaust themselves trying to be career oriented and take care of the people they love. Planning group get togethers. Making sure their dad and brother just fucking talk to each other. Cleaning in the kitchen after the Christmas dinner. While it’s certainly a spectrum and some women do isolate, I find most will try first to overstretch themselves even more to succeed in both areas. Not because they want to, but in my experience, they feel physically guilty for not doing these things with/for others.
This.
You miss the underlying meaning of that "comes home to drink" stereotype. It means a situation made a person at least a habitual alcoholic and likely having a depression. She should be bored instead of depressed.
Make her listen to internet true crime podcasts and try to solve them, simply because she actually wants to do the exciting police stuff. ONCE! Make her work on applications to police forces in other town, but somehow never sending them away, as she might have a tendency to overthink things, and always finds a reason to not go there and accept that change. She is indeed socially lonely, but the lonely "unwomanness" of an unmarried single woman does not define her. She is just entertaining herself in her free time and procrastinating a life choice.
Maybe she is into cooking podcasts, too? She fills her life with international food podcasts cooking all kinds of stuff from all over the world, while she is stuck in her hometown overthinking taking the next step and has never seen the ocean/desert/mountains. It might be her overthinking that the logical choice would be to be the next Chief, while her heart tells her to MOVE even if she has to start as an anonymous beat cop in a big town.
The romance could be about her learning to listen to her heart (more) by it being enchanted, and broken and mended by some guys and / or gals or an AI chatbot. You could call it "Steakout", and combine a whodunnit with a romance. Like she has a guy LI#1 smitten for her, who is another cop, but she does not want to start something at work. Then there is LI#2 her high-school ex (now married), which she occasionally commits to for sex if she needs to, but always feels like a crook for doing it. Yet, now there is LI#3, coming from San Francisco, where he/she works as a cook, because their brother, running a steak restaurant here has committed suicide, and they do not believe in that story.
Let the games begin!