Huh. Well now I understand the Archer joke when they're on the space station and Barry is clinking bottles together and saying archer come out to play.
But like you know you have acne scars, and you know what the jokes are gonna be about even if there are some original ones you hadn’t heard before. I don’t think this girl even knew she was balding until this very moment.
Part of me worries if people collect pics of their enemy, put one through AI or photoshop to make it look like they're holding the roast me paper, and then some innocent person is getting roasted without their consent.
Don't know how the biology works but women get thinning hair too, it is why you see minoxidal for both on the shelves. She also could go with a different hair style where the hair is swept sideways across the scalp to hide it a bit more (like a comb over for women). If there is any natural curl in that hair I'd go for the wavy pixie cut.
https://www.vogue.com/article/best-haircuts-for-thin-hair
Based on the pics, she struggles to try and just tends to give up easily. So the first step would probably be a good therapist, especially one that pushes her, so a DBT or ACT one.
And as always, the deepest roast is when people look at you and try to help.
The problem is she can't shave it. They shine a light on it to tell people it's time to cross the street. Or maybe it's just a sign she was made to work street corners...
I was going to be supportive about a woman in her late 30's going to college to improve her life. but then I saw the title of this post.
Also, don't wear the bare midriff thing. just.... don't......
This comment has been marked as safe. Upvoting/downvoting this comment will have no effect.
OP's BIO:
21 yr old college student, studying political science so knows how to start an argument lol. ex-emo kid that only has her eyeliner left to hold onto
If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Warriors, come out to play-ay!
For reference
Huh. Well now I understand the Archer joke when they're on the space station and Barry is clinking bottles together and saying archer come out to play.
Archer is a great show the humour is outstanding 💯
Lolol I loved that
Playaaaaaayyyy
Oh shit
Dead ringer!
Roast over. Good night everyone!
💀
Hahahahahahaha. Holy shit.
Hands down best one
Your transition from ogre to human is going smoothly
wtf this is so on point and savage as fuck
Lmaoooo
As a 38 year old man who’s been bald for quite some time, the best thing to do when you’re going bald is just shave it off.
The good news is you already have the face of a 38 year old man, so you should be able to pull off the look.
I genuinely could never post on this roast me thing because I would not be able to handle such diabolically savage insults like this
It’s two things 1. Confidence and 2. Knowing that most of the roasts are played up a bit for fun 😊
I have read a lot of comments that are mean and also true
That wasn't one of them. Her face does look about 38 years old, but only because her hair and makeup are from 1987.
It looks like she has a lazy eye
Whoever said that the truth hurts wasn't fukking lying.
I remember one where the guy genuinely looked like he needed help. All the comments were 'nah man. We aren't going to roast you. Look after yourself.'
Likewise I’m too fat for this shit 💀
Me neither. My acne scars alone would make Reddit burn down from the roasty comments, and I would jump in front of a train after of depression.
People willingly getting roasted are insane.
But like you know you have acne scars, and you know what the jokes are gonna be about even if there are some original ones you hadn’t heard before. I don’t think this girl even knew she was balding until this very moment.
Not just a roast, but a learning experience ✨
Ouch
If I had been drinking something just now, I would have choked on it at that last unexpected sentence.
Cropping says she knows.
I can’t for the life of me understand why people do this to themselves.. just like you stated I would never recover!!
Part of me worries if people collect pics of their enemy, put one through AI or photoshop to make it look like they're holding the roast me paper, and then some innocent person is getting roasted without their consent.
I don’t need to, I have a wife to roast me daily…and she is mean.
As a 40 something year old bald man, this advice is spot on. Join r/bald.
As a 50 something year old bald man, come join us at r/bald
If you’re male, female, or other, if you’re thinning, balding, or bald already, r/bald is the best, most positive, and supportive place on Reddit
As a 30 something year old bald man, I'll go join you at r/bald
As a 10 year old bald boy, I’ll go join you on /r/bald
Calilou?
Its fun even if you're not balding. I like to see the glow-ups and the positive vibes.
She better study hard, bc she's not qualified for the Mrs degree.
😂😂
Seriously because how does she have a bald spot. I feel bad for her lol
Don't know how the biology works but women get thinning hair too, it is why you see minoxidal for both on the shelves. She also could go with a different hair style where the hair is swept sideways across the scalp to hide it a bit more (like a comb over for women). If there is any natural curl in that hair I'd go for the wavy pixie cut. https://www.vogue.com/article/best-haircuts-for-thin-hair
Based on the pics, she struggles to try and just tends to give up easily. So the first step would probably be a good therapist, especially one that pushes her, so a DBT or ACT one.
And as always, the deepest roast is when people look at you and try to help.
Maybe the real roast is the friendships we made along the way.
Women get thinning hair but this is clearly a biological male
The internet has traumatized y’all. Ain no way 💀
There are posts where people are trying to prove JFK was a biological female because of his clavicle shape… the world has truly lost it.
Hormones are a bitch. If we remotely have anything off balance women can start thinning or balding
He trims it to create a wig to hide his penis better.
Ah yes, the penis-hiding wig. A classic among drag queens
She shaves that hair off, and she’s halfway to Marlon Brando from Apocalypse Now.
It’s like the whole face is a bald spot.
She's gotta start having guys pull her hair in different spots to even it up a little.
Aye! Relax maan. You’d be stressed out too if you were a 21 year old female with no butt…just an elongated back. 😫
Built like Gumby
She's takes noassatol.
Damn bro
Is it still a roast if it’s true?
The problem is she can't shave it. They shine a light on it to tell people it's time to cross the street. Or maybe it's just a sign she was made to work street corners...
I got secondhand embarrassment from that burn. Jfc. That was a good one
Molly Ringworm
Mary Elizabeth Windswept
Keira Frightly
Moldy Ringworm
You look like a Jersey girl who knows the ins and outs of a Camaro's back seat
No, she’s a Pontiac Fiero girl if I’ve ever seen one.
Squeezing into a fiero is just a fond memory at this point.
Reminds me of all the times the Fiero broke down
Strangely enough, I had a pretty reliable 1986 Fiero 2M4 with the Iron Duke engine. I still miss that car.
Always thought those were so cool as a kid..
She looks like Rosie O'Donnell had a child by impregnating herself
Washed up Jersey (day shift) stripper going back to college at 38 pretending to be 21
I’m 38, and I take that as an insult.
Bet she can find that lever to flip the passenger seat forward, in the dark, on the first try.
Do you play bass for Twisted Sister ?
I'd worry more about that thinning hairline than worrying about dressing up like Aladdin.
That jawline would like a word
Its one of Demi & Bruce's illegitimate children... fathered by Jay Leno.
I thought it was more of a professional wrestler gimmick look
Looks like a Turkish hooker
You know you're just supposed to gain 15lbs the first year of college right?
She heard about the freshman fifteen and took it as a challenge
Conquered it in the first week and going for extra credit!
Whoever was 16th in line was very lucky.
She’s a third year freshman
Fifteen pounds? She heard fifteen poundings.
It seems she heard “freshman fifty”.
She had to repeat her first year... three times.
It’s her 3rd freshman year!
Yeah she's definitely always needing to find fresh men
you ever see someone and know what characteristics they must have gotten from their dad?
I was gonna say that brick house of a jawline but yeah the hair too I guess
Are you trying out for a community theater production, or do you always just look like the junkie girl from Rent?
Is this junkie girl from Rent? Because I'd definitely junkie it up with her
yeah thats rosario dawson lmao shes fine as fuck
Ikr, how is this a roast lol
Hell yeah! I'd mainline some Rosario 💉😵
Perfect example of just because you can get it on, doesn't mean you should be wearing it.
The arm bands are like when you wrap twine around bread before you bake it.
Brutal!
21 ... Granny eyes
How long did it take you to realize that you’re a practice girl?
Just now
What’s a practice girl?
I can see your bald spot
We all can. Stevie Wonder can too.
When you have a belly like yours. You don’t get a belly ring, you get onion rings !
Damn thats diabolical
You could have stopped after the Freshman 15.
Rosie O’Donnell when she was 40.
Resting brow face
Lay off the smokes for god sakes you look 51
I feel like every single word in this title is a lie
There is no way you are 21 or born as a female.
How recently did you become a girl?
This shit got me.
21M just a college guy home for the holidays. Fixed it for you.
I thought i was the only one that had this come to mind. I even thought of adding "sexually confused" to the college guy part!
I appreciate someone with a worse hairline than me at 40.
The way you dress you must be enrolled at the Heidi Fleiss Academy of Solicitation Arts
Mad at your own selfie pretty much sums up your hope. Thanks for bringing the 80's hair back though, RIP your lady jungle if it matches.
You look like you went back to college after your divorce. It's easier now that the kids have moved out.
I’m not usually into men, but $1 is $1
you get the face of a 50 year old woman
I’m fucking dying seeing this outside of the sub
Crazy how your bald spot and cleavage look like they’re spaced exactly the same, was this intentional?
You look like the kind of girl that gets kidnapped.
It’s giving silence of the lambs
She was a big girl
What is she, a size 14?
And immediately returned
But is so annoying she gets released like an undersized fish, ironically.
The uncertainty in your face in pic 2 is entirely warranted
r/bald is this way.
You look like a 46 y:o twice divorced mom. Of two kids named Dakota and Maverick , who dresses up to go to Denny's .
I feel bald for her
You could eat all the makeup you’re wearing and you’d still be ugly on the inside
You look like you have kids that are 21.
If Cara Dune had a sworn oath against Windex and salad ...
21 my arse, you look like a 34 single mom of two with different dads and have done unholy things to pay rent
You're making this too easy
Been “21” since…2003?
You look like a random club slut in a shitty Russell brand movie who says stuff like “ you can put it in me bum, yeah?”
21 going on 42
I was going to be supportive about a woman in her late 30's going to college to improve her life. but then I saw the title of this post.
Also, don't wear the bare midriff thing. just.... don't......
Rough lookin 37
Not bad for a practice fatty.
Imagine finally being old enough to drink at bars and already having aged out of being taken home.
You look like you would be good at opening stubborn jars for men.
That’s a long back
For a woman… I bet you have a pretty big cock
Bald
Damn looking at your hair situation makes me feel plenty times better than mine, thanks for the charity work youre doing
I've heard of the freshman 15 but I've never seen that with a freshman 15 years as well...
You’re not the mom?
Face made for podcasts, at least you have art to fall back on
It's like God reached into his spare parts bucket
.....and was several parts short but said, "Fuck it! Ship it anyway"
Ypu have Jay Lenos tits too
You look like your always a bridesmaid.
i have a pretty good one but i don’t think i have the heart to participate in this subreddit and i think you’re still pretty lol
I would never be able to handle being roasted like this. I'm sorry if any of it hurt you. I know you willingly put it on the page. But, still.
When did you transition?
Can’t dig a hole big enough to roast you.
I bet your dad has put a lock on the fridge
21 going on 52
Do us a favor and stay home sweetheart, like forever.
Experimenting for you in college consisted of different food combinations
I’m sorry but working in a high school cafeteria does not make you a college girl.
You are the spitting image of my 45 year old coworker.
You look like your heroin dealer is your best friend, and you just survived your 2nd overdose this week.
You look like you give unenthusiastic blow jobs
You take off that makeup and you're no longer a woman lol.
Fe Fi Fo Fum, your face is so hideous it makes all the boys run
Just a college girl? Did you enroll at 40? After third divorce?
Male to female for sure
You look like temu version of Meg from family guy
Jason Patric from The Lost Boys decide to transition?!?
Political Science major and Monica Lewinsky body double for the movie. Yeah, it fits.
Nice comb over. Invest in wigs now before it's too late.
Shit you look like you stuff cottage cheese down your pants to smooth shit out.
every single item in picture 4 is ill fitting - that’s a marvelous feat.
Flashdance... with gravy
Got the head of a midget on a somewhat normal sided body
Hoe for the holidays
The 90’s called. It wants its “Xena: Warrior Princess” outfit back.
I see Delta Omega Gamma is pledging the same plain girls.
Seriously you look like the reason why disco died in the 70s