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OP's BIO:

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I'm 19- a musician and artist (most common art forms, and an electric guitarist, classical guitarist, folk instrument enthusiast, bassist, singer, synthesizer player... Whatever else probably)... I also do photography, writing and design. I also collect vintage things:) I'm quite a bit into vintage fashion (70s-80s) things and recently started collecting vintage clothes too...

Random stuff to help the roasting?

-My favourite colours are Green, Purple and pink -I found a Manx kitten under a bin years ago- and now she's my best friend -My best human friend left me this Christmas and told me to F off after telling her merry Christmas:) -My home's roof if currently leaking -I collect beer cans of interest beers I've tried -I was born in Dublin -I just spent lots of money on an old Buggles Vinyl even though I don't have a record player -I study robotics -I am a vintage synthesizer nerd -I'm a professional succulent grower

Don't hold back and get creative- I've attached a bunch of new and older photos to help;)

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If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.

You look like you were electrocuted while thrifting

You look like if cyndi lauper and willy wonka fucked

19? It was either 12yo boy or 63yo alcoholic aunt that smells of Pall Malls.

Your Christmas was shite because even Santa has his fucking limits.

You're that annoying theater kid. I bet your parents are always begging you to find a real job.

Looks like you watched "A Clockwork Orange" and decided to base your entire personality on it.

You look like e.t in that scene where it dressed up as a woman.

I bet your vagina looks even more depressed

I'd roast you, but I enjoy your band, Megadeth.

First picture, you're 12. Second picture, you're a 60 year old circus freak. Wtf is wrong with you....

2 comments in 6 hours. Thats the roast

You looks like you hosted your own christmas, except that the whole family is played by you in different outfit. frtom the toddler to the grandma

19?????????????

You look like a 45 year old from Czech

This is what happens when two of the three kids in the trench coat back out.

Willy Wonka fucked an Oompa Loompa.

You want to be Willy Wonka very badly

You're the leprechaun that told Ralph to "Burn 'em all!"

Jesus lady, that's the most roughed up 19 year old I've ever seen. Are you some sort of artistic Roughneck working in the texas sun slinging chain to pull out some Texas Tea?

Bio. Dont care. How do you look like a 90 year old homeless witch and 12 at the same time. You look like youd abduct yourself.

Greta’s slower, less important brother.

Your aesthetic is “Kate Bush falling down a chimney”

I never realized “A Clockwork Orange” could be adapted as a drag show… I learned something new today.

Born February 29 -I’m 19. Do the math.

Bet you could buy beer, and smokes when you were 10.

You seem really cool and interesting... I'm also a huge loser and have no friends.

Temu Cyndi Lauper

You look like a lesbian carnival barker for a haunted house.

Oh look how zaney and mental I am…

You look like you’ve brushed your hair with a firework ffs

You look like the lovechild of a Victorian chimney sweep and a Christmas ornament. That top hat has seen more drama than your friendships, and the red ribbon is holding on like it knows it’s the only thing keeping the outfit festive.

Your makeup is giving “frostbite chic.” The white cracks under your eyes look like your tears froze mid-existential crisis. It’s less “winter wonderland” and more “snowstorm of unresolved emotions.”

You dress like you’re cosplaying as every character in a Dickens novel simultaneously. One photo says “pub poet,” another says “holiday ghost,” and the third says “Guinness-fueled time traveler.” Pick a century and commit.

Your fashion sense is a mood board made by a haunted music box. Velvet, plaid, lace, tinsel, celestial prints—you’re not wearing clothes, you’re wearing a fever dream curated by a Victorian librarian who discovered synthwave.

You apply makeup like you’re preparing for battle in a glitter war. That red cheek paint? Bold. It’s giving “clowncore meets cabaret vengeance.” I respect the chaos.

You hold a pint like it’s your emotional support beverage. That Guinness isn’t just a drink—it’s a lifestyle. You look like you just told the bartender your life story in iambic pentameter.

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You’re not just dressed—you’re styled by trauma and triumph. You’re the kind of person who turns heartbreak into haute couture and seasonal depression into performance art.

Oh no, she’s doing red face, this is exactly why Washington had to change their name to the commanders.

You’d definitely be one of the few who gets trafficked and the traffickers beg your parents to take you back.

You look like if Boy George got even more confused about his pronouns

Noddy Holder has been located

What in the Clockwork Orange isa goin’ on here?!!?

You look like Noddy Holder.

You look like a Clown and Willy Wonka fucked and used heroin during pregnancy…

You literally look like you're aged 15-55

19?

You’re aging like a tuna sub that’s been left outside in Phoenix for a week.

One of the few that don’t have to worry about the perverts looking for teenage girls because you look like you’re in your 60s.

Blonde chucky

You’re Chucky’s sister, Chunky

Yoo Leprechaun dont get sad they didnt let u  an elf .. St Patricks day  is coming soon

You could either get the kids discount or the senior discount... could go either way. Nobody's gonna contradict you.

That's a HARD 19 💀

A Clockwork Lemon

I bet your plants are trying to leaf you as well.. See what I did there?

You look like the worst DC Comics villain ever, and they have Condiment King and Polka Dot Man so that's really saying something.

You look like Dave Mustane’s daughter, from when he had a relationship with a tube sock.

I don't know whether you are 18 or 60, there is no between

Czy to ona!?!!??!?! Magda Gessler!?!?!?!?

There are convicted murderers on death row who have contributed more to society than you. Get a job.

You look like your vag and or balls smell like moth balls.

The cast of clockwork orange did not age well…..

The love child of David Crosby + the Cowardly Lion from the Wizard of Oz

Stevie shits

You look like what i imagine if Boy George and Timothee Chalamet fucked and produced you.

Sorry your grandchildren didn't visit you on Christmas.

You look like a failed clone of Jean Wilder's Willy Wonka

This looks like a slideshow for rejected characters of David Lynch films.

You look like the mad hatter

If you want to laugh or cry just look in the mirror. If you you want to laugh then cry look in the mirror. If you want to laugh till you cry look in the mirror. You don’t need us to do either. Merry Christmas

This is the penguin from the 90s Batman movies.

You look like Dave Mustane if he was broke.

You look like Angus Young, but uglier!!!

Just look in the mirror!

I didn’t know Angus Young and Dave Mustaine had a daughter.

First pic - 17 year old male. Second pic - 56 year old female. WTF?

You look like an extra that got fired from the movie A Clockwork Orange for looking too weird

When someone asks you, if you are male or female. Do you simply just say yes?

Loved your “Yes I Didi” campaign

Nobody can roast you as hard as you did when you made this post with those pictures and the info about yourself.

You chose the ‘go wide’ strategy for hobbies and talents as well as body type.

If we 3d printed your pictures for a blind person to ‘see’, they would chew off their fingers.

I thought Gene Wilder passed away a few years ago.

You could be Sophia’s body double in a Golden Girls reboot.

The doll no child wanted for Christmas

Looks like a Great Value Chappell Roan, mental health like Kanye West

Shouldn't this post be on r/OpenCasketViewing?

I’m sure you already know you look like a leprechaun, but other than that all the stuff you listed is pretty fuckin cool

You look like you can't decide whether to be Riff Raff or Little Nell!

You look like the crankies left you in a bin near a theatre as a baby and you can't quite live up to the legacy.

( you might have to Google(

Can't work out if you're 16 or 60

Well I think you sound like a lot of fun!

We knew about pink and green, but explain your fondness for the color purple.

She looks like escaping straight jackets is a normal occurrence.

Idk if you're 48 with poor self esteem or 18 with poor genetics.

On the bright side your personality seems fun so you'll probably land a nice lady one day. Hang in there man.

How do you look 60 then 15 in different pics? Either super worried or complimenting you on accident

I can smell the mothballs and asparagus piss emanating from these pictures.

If Willy Wonka fucked Greta Thunberg and then they had a kid who later had a kid with Stephen Hawking that kid would still look better than you.

Pic 5 you look like a Temu Dave Mustaine

You look like Dave Mustaine in drag..

look at you

If Pippy Long Stockings and Annie asked Boy George to be their sperm donor...

Oh fucking A! I thought Michael J. Pollard was dead!

Your plants would be in better care with A small fin goldfish!

Roberta Plant

I can’t if you’re a child or a small 30 year old woman

This is hilarious cause I went to highschool with u. 😭

How many puppets do you own?

gurl if ur Christmas was absolute dogsh¡t, then how about u get that average British grandma lookin ass appearance, nah don't let me get yo "OY MATE. WHY U DO BELONG HERE? THIS IS MAH PROPERTEH N U CANT COME HERE", lookin ass at my face; built like a 90 yr old mannequin with a wig, slip a banana in ur basket of figs, "just come over here and give that ass a jig", lookin ass out of my face

You look like a custom character in Red Dead Online, same graphics and everything.

I wanted to make a roast based on your gender confusion, but I'm way too confused.   

worzel gummidge has a right glow up

You look like a dave mustaine inverted ballSak

Yeah no wonder your Christmas was white with how fucking pale your face is (only doing this one because it's to try making someone forget a bad Christmas)

You look simultaneously ten and seventy years old.

Pic 3 legit makes me think of Rocky Horror, but it's been so long since I seen it that I don't remember if it's a character or just fits the style. I like it. But you came for a roast so... you are like super pale. Like "I went out at night and got a moonburn" pale. I'm not good at this. Hope Christmas gets better.

Ringling Brothers… I found your bearded lady.

No joke - You sound like such a likable and interesting person based on your bio.

So your cheeks did the switch. Poor butt.

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I feel like I’m in the twilight zone

1900 maybe. Tell us about the one time at band camp.

You look like a splicer from bioshock

Even your camera wants to close its eyes

Aging like milk.....

Methed up clown nightmares.

Even Jack the ripper has standards too high for you

19 and going through Menopause

Looks like the grinch has been pimping out Cindy Lou Who

You look like an elder and a minor at the same time.

It seems you're entire aesthetic is 'I'm a victorian era alcoholic opium addicted prostitute' but such a bad one that even Jack himself chose an early night instead of a night with you!

She’s got plump round cheeks and ginger hair and still I don’t want to fuck her….. wtf?