I live in a apartment complex and I have two neighbors - Martha and...let's call him "Shaggy" (you'll get why). Martha is a sweet old lady and Shaggy is...a total and utter anus. He complained about the noise when I moved in (although I tried to be as quiet as I can, SOME noise just can't be avoided), he complains about the noise if I so much as sneeze and woe be me if I forget to clean the hallways when it is my turn. His favorite saying? "WE HAVE RULES IN THIS HOUSE!". Whatever I do wrong, even the smallest infraction that a normal person would either overlook or seek a private talk about, got reported to the house owner - or the cops. I have nothing but trouble with this mofo and I hate his guts.
One day, I got the cops called on me due to a noise complaint at 9:50 pm (house rules say that you have to keep the noise down "to apartment level" starting at 10 pm). I immediately knew that the "culprit" was Shaggy because Martha not only does not give a damn unless I make so much noise the entire complex is shaking on its foundations but is also completely deaf without her hearing aides - which she removes every day at 8 pm, sharp. While the cops are snooping around my apartment (they were called because there were screams and curses coming from my apartment and they wanted to make sure I had not killed anyone, even though I had just burned myself something fierce on my stove and had vented my pain and frustration) and generally being a bother, one of them suddenly asks me "Do you smoke weed?" and points out the window at the playground behind the complex. And that was when it hit me.
Cannabis may have been legalized here in germany, but the law states that there are places where you are simply not allowed to light up - like in the vicinity of playgrounds, schools, childcare facilities etc., makes sense, yeah? And Shaggy is a freaking stoner. Walks around with red eyes, his apartment and clothes reek of the stuff and I have never seen him sober. He is constantly high as a kite, which makes arguing with him both scary and funny.
Well, anyway, the playground behind the apartment complex means that the entire complex is a no-weed zone (even if you only light up indoors). Now, normally I wouldn't have said anything, because I ain't a snitch and Shaggy keeps it indoors. But like I said, Shaggy is a b-tard and a stickler for the rules. Well, two can play that game.
I eventually got the cops off my butt (after they had looked into every nook and cranny and found no corpse) and told them to check out Shaggy, telling them about his weed use near a playground. Guess who got his apartment searched top to bottom and eventually arrested when he tried to attack a officer because he DARED to touch his stash? WE HAVE RULES IN THIS HOUSE, SHAGGY!
AUNTIE EDITH SAYS:
- I know about Martha's hearing aide habits because I help her out with stuff (household work, going shopping with her etc.). While we are together, she likes to talk my ear off (many old people like to talk if they have an audience) about anything and whatever. And a few times, the topic of me being worried that I am too noisy for her liking came up, since Shaggy constantly complains. She just laughed and waved me off with a "Just don't bring down the house and we're good. Besides, I remove my hearing aides in the evening at 8 pm. Weird habit, I know, haha."
- The cops didn't kick in Shaggy's door "just on my say so". They went across the hallway, rang the bell and when Shaggy answered, they both took a step back upon the smell coming from his apartment. When they asked him if he's aware that there's a playground behind the house and that there are children in the house (kids of other inhabitants on the other floors), he became aggressive as in "Piss off man, 's all good nowadays." The police then asked him to show them his stash because while weed is legal now, there is a limit to how much you are allowed to have, even in your apartment (50g and up to 3 plants per adult person). He refused and the cops cited probable cause because he is obviously hiding something and could hide/destroy the evidence if they waited for a warrant. They shoved Shaggy aside, he followed them in and apparently the cops found way more than he is allowed to have, because there was yelling, a commotion and then Shaggy was lead out in cuffs with one of the officers sporting a black eye.
Holy shit - he actually attacked a police officer when his house was being searched?
I love it. He didn't just get caught breaking the rules, he actually went the extra mile and dug himself into a hole.
"WE HAVE RULES IN THIS _COUNTRY_, SHAGGY!"
This isn't 'Nam, Shaggy. There are rules.
I heard, in court, his defence was "it wasn't me"
But they caught it on camera
Wasn't me.
sounds like he had anger issues.
More likely he had 'Being a dick' issues.
this 100x
Ruh roh, Shaggy!
How do you say "Zoinks!" in German?
I actually Googled it, and apparently, in the German dub, he says Verflixt. It is "a colloquial German word expressing annoyance, similar to "darn," "darned," "confounded," or "blasted" in English, often used like "Damn it!" or "Shoot!" when something goes wrong or is complicated"
Interesting! That has to be a cognate of "perplexed".
Not really. It's an euphemism of "verflucht" which means "cursed" or "damn!"
Well now I just have the mental image of Chris Tucker going "Verfluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucht!"
Interesting! TIL.
We sometimes mimic a doom sound by saying: "Düdüm!"
That's the Netflix loading screen sound!
Yeah, kinda.
Sounds like Law & Order to me lol
Scheiße!
This is the one
I was thinking more Shaggy "It wasn't me" than Ruh roh Shaggy, but seems like a good time to say: Why not both?
And he would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for those meddling kids!
Underrated comment
I actually clicked off of this post, but damnit! I came back just to give you an update and reply
Did he try to claim
"It wasn't me."
He was caught red-handed.
Creepin' with the girl next door?
Were they both butt naked banging on the bathroom floor?
But how could he forget that he had given her an extra key???
All that time she was standing there she never took her eyes off he.
You mean red eyed?
Green handed! (that was actually how they caught someone in the original cartoon!)
As soon as you mentioned hallway cleaning I knew this was Germany. Es gibt eine Hausordnung!
Ahh yes, physically assaulting a police officer. Cause we all know that always ends well.
Eh, different story with the polizei. Although, they don’t have batons. They have “Repeater-Beaters”. Metal ball on the end of a spring on a collapsible baton. Unfortunately for me, I live in Germany from 18-21, and as is the case, had seen that a few times.
Jesus.. that sounds SO much worse.
It is… it is… I still sweat sometimes when I remember/think about those days. Lots of good times, but Jesus, those things were just mean. For every swing, you got hit like 20 times. Could you imagine the American police having that? They already shoot people in the nuts with pepper balls.
That's some new knowledge and I'm friends with a few police people.. how did you get to learn about that?
Both personal experience after a random night of drinking, and also during those same nights, sitting back and watching it happen to those I know. The good ole days.
Do black eyes happen that quickly, though?
Really? I've had days when I'm sober, but I'm a big drinker... and yes.. shiners happen that fast. I'm not defending either party here, but the shiner... yeah, totally plausible.
I'm not going to claim that cops and certain conservative state governments might not stupidly or maliciously misinterpret it that way, but the law is very clear - indoors in his home is fine, playground or not.
I have to wonder, though, if the cops could smell the weed strongly outside since they inquired with OP about smoking it before looking for dead/injured bodies. I also wonder if the numerous complaints by Shaggy may have added to the cops questioning.
The weed was just an excuse to ask to search the place. I'm assuming since I don't know German law, he could have said no, and, the police would have just left as they don't have a good reason to force their way in. But he let them in.
Came here to say that, OPs statement is totally wrong here.
If the guys apartment would be on ground level right next to it and he would blow smoke into that direction it 'could' become a problem, that specific fine line hasn't been established in court yet. Other than that, no, the cops would have no say here.
Also it's incredibly unlikely that they just up and went into his apartment. They do need a proper reason which "he smokes weed" is not.
They wouldn't be able to force their way in, but they could ask to be let in and hope the guy was dumb enough to just let them in.
OP misinterprets the law -> Polizei knocks politely and asks if they can have a look inside -> Polizei tries to touch his stash -> guy gets angy -> too stoned to think and defends his stash -> Handschellen go click
I can see that, actually. Not like OP was in the apartment with them.
Perhaps the open window near the playground gives them enough cause as then the smoke is not remaining indoors.
In Germany?
I mean, I haven't lived in Germany for some time, but I know that if you get the police at your house and they are actively searching for something, the laws as written don't leave a lot of room for interpretation.
If you happen to be in a hermetically sealed box with full carbon filters and scrubbers and smoke weed, you're still probably going to be in violation of the law.
Cannabis usage was only fully legalized in Germany last year (2024) and it allows up to 25 grams of cannabis for personal use, and up to three plants cultivated indoors. There is still heavy opposition to it throughout the country so my guess is that the laws regarding usage in homes have not caught up with the legal system quite yet.
Neighbour here: The war on drugs didn't really work, so it's better to regulate it. I know in Frankfurt they added a medical room at the station (hauptbahnhof) where drug addicts could get drugs, take m under medical guidance and be pushed towards long-term treatment.
at first this wasn't a popular move "are you going to hand out free drugs? are you mad?!!" but this caused the nuisance complaints to plummet. The drug gangs dried up and the addicts didn't have to steal anymore to afford their stuff.
Unorthodox, humane forward-thinking policy actually works!
You are allowed 50grams for personal use, not 25. The 25g limit is only the amount you are allowed to carry at once.
You can also cultivate plants outdoors, they just have to be inaccessible from the outside (so not on your frontlawn, but inside your fenced in property its allowed)
What's funny to me is I KNOW there are Germans who have scales at home and measure out exactly the amount they are permitted to have, then get very nervous about having 1/2 a gram over the personal usage limit, because Germans.
God, I love Germans sometimes. I drove my friends in Germany up the wall for a lot of reasons and the biggest one is how I found that kind of adherence to social values comical. Like "are they seriously going to weigh your pot and cite you if you are outside and the police ask you how much you're carrying, and you're like 1/2 a gram over?"
And also somewhat hilarious is the fact that yes, yes they will.
(I don't smoke anything or consume cannabis, so I'm not the guy who needs to worry. Still, even if I was, I'd find it hilarious.)
I mean yeah, I'm German and I would do that too. Why would I want to risk breaking the law accidentally?
Yeah, I didn't want to chime in being an American with no knowledge of German laws, but I also don't think the cops there are allowed to search an entire apartment just because a neighbor heard cursing coming from it.
OP indicated that this is in Germany.
I'm aware, and "öffentliche" is the relevant word in §5 of the Konsumcannabisgesetz.
And public smoking laws aren't applicable in a private residence in Germany.
Womp, womp.
He wasn't arrested for the weed. It might have been enough for them to ask to search the place, and he let them in. He attacked the officer for touching the weed, that is why he got arrested.
But, that's why he called. They obviously don't know their own laws. There was no garuntee they'd come in. They came in because the other tenants behavior, not smoke. I'm not sure your point, but you're not telling me anything the post said that I didn't already know.
I didn’t assume America, and know nothing about the relevant laws in Germany. Thanks for the clarification.
Anytime...
[deleted]
yes, as I explained here https://www.reddit.com/r/MaliciousCompliance/comments/1phi8hi/we_have_rules_in_this_house_thanks_for_reminding/nszgy34/
In Germany, where this story takes place?
You're redditor number 4 asking this, I've answered above. Yes. Turns out I can read, sorry to disappoint ;)
I love how you need to explain that the cops did not kick his door. As a fellow German I know that they most likely politely rung his bell and asked nicely until he got agessive
This story had less masks being ripped off revealing the culprit than I expected.
And he would've gotten away with it if it wasn't for that sneaky axe murderer OP!
A private resident inside his dwelling, is not subject to public smoking bans.
Interpreting the law aunt for everyone.
This is per Germany law.
"You know we're living in A SOCIETY HERE!"
George Weedstanza
I mean, I wouldn't expect a whole corpse to fit in your crack anyway
F*ck around, find out.
It's Reddit. You can write "fuck."
Yeah, Fr*nce is the F-word here
This made me laugh out loud.
Knowledge is power. France is bacon
I get caught by profanity being filtered like that on my voice to text all the time.
Dead internet
I'm pretty good at recognizing AI photos video, but I need to learn how to recognize the traits in writing. I haven't gotten that down yet
There are websites that can detect if it's AI. I tried 3 different sites and all 3 said 0% AI text found.
Fun fact: The way those sites work is by using AI models that weren't good enough to be usable directly. They're actually really bad at identifying AI text.
George Orwell's "1984" is consistently flagged as having been bot-written.
Now ask yourself of those sites are as accurate as you want them to be, or as useless as the AI they pretend to identify..
It wasn't written by AI. If that is what you are hinting at.
It’s in a house, then an apartment, then a house, then an apartment?
What apartment makes you clean the hallways?
Unable to keep the simple fact of the location consistent says AI
an apartment complex is just a big house, and stuff gets lost in translation as "in the building" translated literally from german is "in the house".
German Hausordnung makes you clean the stairs, which again, could also be translated as hallway.
oh, and also, stairways can also be translated as "Treppenhaus", so another house right there too.
Pretty much this. My english is good, but the finer details of translation are a different beast altogether.
A house can hold any number of apartments. That is not difficult to understand.
Must be a dialect thing because here in Canada, a house is… a house.
An apartment building holds apartments
We invite friends to stay at our "house" all the time. We live in an apartment.
In the 'States, a house may be classified as a detached single-family unit, a duplex, a triplex . . . and an apartment house/building or condominium. It depends on the area, too.
Anything well-written and using proper capitalization, indentation, grammar, spelling, and punctuation is inevitably flagged as 'A.I. Slop' by jealous Luddites who likely slept through their English classes.
I dont smoke weed or anything but I was under the impression that people high from weed are chill and have a dont-care attitude. Someone correct me. I dont plan to try it. Its not legal where I live. Hahahaha.
Depends, if you're a paranoid arsehole then it doesn't matter how stoned you are.
I’ve been high on weed twice in my life. The first time was super! Super chill and laughing for no reason.
The second time was hell. My spouse called the emergency services because I legit thought I was dying. Which is why it was only twice. One bad trip really killed the joy for me. Yikes.
I see. Today I learned something new.
Shaggy hört sich nach dem Albtraum an.
The “snitches get stitches” rule takes a backseat to the “don’t be a dick to everyone” guideline.
Apartment? Or house? Are the different words in Germany? I'm confused
Apartment complex. 6 floors, 3 small-ish apartments to a floor. So 18 apartments in one house/complex.
I was expecting a bunch of "wasn't me" excuses
Was anyone else saying “WE HAVE RULES!” in Walter Sobchak’s voice? 😂
Add to one act of malicious compliance one act of revenge, mix well, and serve cold.
This is how it's done.
Where do you live that the legal limit is 50grams???
I'm pretty sure you're confusing the carry limit with the legal limit as a single plant can easily yield more than 50grams.
Absolutely insane that it would be legal on the plant but illegal as soon as you cut it off.
Germany
That's insane, like the policymakers have zero understanding of gardening insane.
I think it might be 3 plants plus 50 gm indoors, but you probably want to check with a german
Well yeah that's what was said but a plant easily yields 3oz (84g) dry or 136g wet so the simple fact of clipping off a branch makes it now illegal.
Dispose of it
Ruh roh raggy!
They just went in a searched his apartment on your say-so? These are professional policemen?
From my understanding, the police in Germany are a lot different than police in the US
My expectation for this whole story was crushed when it wasn’t about the neighbor breaking into his apartment and doing it buck naked on the bathroom floor, the counter, sofa, shower, on camera, etc.
Fair play.
Although, if you screamed THAT much because you got a little burn while you were cooking alone… I would say you are guilty of being extra, and might be a bit of an attention seeker.
Depending on where someone gets a "little" burn can affect how much it hurts. Oil spatter on my arm isn't too bad. Steam burn on the BACK of my hand from something microwaved sent me to the ER & needed my hand peeled like a dead frog.. Grabbed a frying pan handle straight from out of the oven at 400 & had enough calloused skin that I could treat that burn at home.
I was taking a pot from the stove and when I turned around to switch off the stove, I slipped on the tile floor, reached out to stop myself from falling and ended up slamming my hand on the still hot stove plate with my weight behind it. Needless to say, that bleeping HURT, especially since my panicked brain couldn't figure out for a few seconds if I should let go and slam into the ground or push myself up via the hand still pressed on the stove plate. Eventually I decided to take the fall and rolled around on the floor, holding my hand and screaming and cussing my head off.
...I eventually got up, bandaged my hand and called a friend to drive me to the ER because it wouldn't stop hurting, But before I could leave to meet him, the cops arrived. When the whole shenanigans with Shaggy were over, I left and my friend got me to the ER.
Unless the police has a warrant ("Durchsuchungsbefehl") or there is obvious imminent danger ("Gefahr im Verzug") they would have had no right to ask for entering your appartment.
I had seriously burned myself on my stove and spent a few minutes rolling on the floor, screaming and cussing my head off before I managed to get up and bandage my hand. When the cops arrived a bit later, I told them just that and showed them my hand, but they told me that due to the screams and curses coming from my apartment, they wanted to make sure that I didn't chop someone to pieces in there and gently but insistently shoved me aside. I could've made a fuss about muh warrant, but kinda understood where they were coming from, so I relented.
Played him at his own game. Finally the Allman with the huge stick up his ass got removed
What a dope.
Is anyone else wondering about mythical "violent stoner?"
Stoners get violent sometimes, especially on bad weed laced with some other drug.
Yes. That's the mythical PCP laced weed you're referring to.
DARE really did a number on American children.
Not mythical at all; but I was referring to paraquat. That stuff really messes with you.
You lost me at
Remind your AI prompt to not include such specific details that you don’t have a way of knowing.
...I know that because I help Martha out a lot. Going shopping with her and other stuff. Martha likes to blather on about anything and whatever and so she told me she has that habit. Not everything is a sign of AI, dammit.
God forbid you actually have a relationship with your neighbours.
In Germany, people tend to be nicer to one another.
Also one other major difference… if you are walking around town and decide to stop and eat, you will likely just pull up a seat next to a stranger. Rather than taking a whole table to yourself. I miss Deustcheland some.
Ai
I wonder how many bot accounts are here that just write AI under every post
Seriously, surely many of them are bots, but there are plenty of folks who have never encountered colorful characters in their lives and so cannot fathom some of the weird shit out there could actually be real. There’s a lot of AI storytelling going on, sure, but there’s also a lot of redneck bullshit or affluenza types or Karens competitive Karen-ing or psycho hose beasts going psycho that are definitely real stories.
Really now? So I'm imagining Shaggy and his stupid antics?
Yes, you are.
I don’t think we had ai bots in reddit doing stories 4 years ago, account has been around for a while now.
It's just shitty writing, not Ai.
How did you know that Shaggy browses 4chan?
You burned yourself and just randomly started screaming for no reason?
This is very weird.
I was taking a pot from the stove and when I turned around to switch off the stove, I slipped on the tile floor, reached out to stop myself from falling and ended up slamming my hand on the still hot stove plate with my weight behind it. Needless to say, that bleeping HURT, especially since my panicked brain couldn't figure out for a few seconds if I should let go and slam into the ground or push myself up via the hand still pressed on the stove plate. Eventually I decided to take the fall and rolled around on the floor, holding my hand and screaming and cussing my head off.
9
Cops searching your place? Did you authorise that?
Probable cause / "Gefahr im Verzug". The cops can enter your apartment if they have reason to believe a crime is in progress. And "loud screams and curses coming from a apartment" justified them entering without a warrant.
Ok, but looking for a body and then closely examining your apartment are different! IMO.
you must look and behave like a "lovely fellow" if a simple "yeah that was me in the kitchen" wasnt enough to dissuade the cops from believing a crime was in process
also, entering without a warrant isnt the same as searching your entire apartment without a warrant.
Not the US. Germany.
r/USdefaultism
more like USdefaultism-defaultism
im german...
even in Germany, entering without a warrant isnt the same as searching the whole place without a warrant.
https://karsten-bolte.de/darf-polizei-in-meine-wohnung/
haben sie nicht, der Nachbar hats nur behauptet.
und was dürfen sie NICHT machen?