It seems to me like you are equating worldly wealth and things with the Love of God.

Simply because you are not blessed in worldly life right now does not mean youre rejected.

Were never promised worldly well being, in fact were promised to be hated by the world and all its systems.

That still does not mean he rejected you. Or that he will not bless you later.

Even if he doesn't... he still loves you, and is asking you if you still love him, even if he does nothing for you. He owes us nothing ultimately.... hes already given his son to die for us, thats more than we deserve

I’m a little confused why you felt like God was calling you specifically to Maine when you were already in Texas. Do you think you could have pursued social work where you lived? And at what point do you feel you can actually say Jesus has rejected you? When things didn’t go the way you expected? Does not getting what we want automatically mean God said “no” to us rather than redirecting us?

It really sounds like you’ve experienced a lot of pain, disappointment, and unfair situations and I don’t want to minimize that at all. What your mother did was your mother’s choice, not God rejecting you. People can interfere with our plans, but they can’t stop God’s will for our lives.

When God wants something for you, He knows how to make it happen, even if He has to speak through loss, setbacks, confusion, or closed doors. He often uses things that we view as punishments to expose the things we’ve accidentally turned into idols, including plans we’ve created for ourselves. Do you think there’s a chance you made an idol out of the idea of moving to Maine and built your whole sense of purpose around that one plan?

I’ve been there. Before I had my daughter, I wanted to go into business management, make good money, and have a comfortable life. That was my whole vision. Then God blessed me with my daughter, who is non-verbal autistic, and my life changed overnight. The future I imagined for myself was gone, and I had to grieve it. But through that suffering, God drew me closer to Him and showed me a new purpose, now I want to help my church build a disability ministry. A future I never expected.

So even if you don’t like where you are right now, God can still work through it. You could volunteer with 1-800-Need-Him, find a local church that could use an extra pair of hands (maybe someone could give you a ride), share the gospel online, or serve in ways you haven’t explored yet. God will use whatever you give Him.

Don’t put a period where God put a comma. He is not done with you, sister. I hope this helps.

ima upvote this hoping that someone else can explain this better but trust me there’s a answer to your question 

Spread the gospel there, and maybe he needed you away from your family, and he could want there for other reasons.

Help me understand why it's Jesus fault that your mother is controlling and manipulative. Help me also understand why it's Jesus fault that you as a 27 year old ADULT were under the control of your mother against your will. Then help me understand why it's Jesus fault that you spend your days surfing the web and playing videogames.

Do you ever find fault in yourself?

Abundance is experienced from within. You can have eveything and still experience missing something. Simultaneously, you can have nothing and still experience having everything you need, feeling fullfilled.

Abundance and fullfillment is experienced within and you can always change your experience of your life.

Try and see the big picture not that it’s helpful at the moment I hope this part of your life will make sense when you look back follow your own river no one can do you better than you

You're choosing to sit at home and play video games.

Some of the happiest and most peaceful times in my life was when I had nothing and nobody.

Get off your couch and stop gaming. Focus on growing up and being an adult and pursue Christ. He will open doors as you mature and are ready.

Jesus doesn’t reject anyone. You left when it got hard. Come back to Him and thank God for the isolation. Thank God for trials. Thank God for the punishment he doles out on sons and daughters.

Why doesn't anyone empathize or agree with me? God wouldn't let me go to Maine!!! My mom blocked me and when I finally went, I ended up homeless. Ok????

First, I'm so sorry for what you have gone through and what you are currently going through. That sounds heartbreaking, and I'm sorry for your loss.

Second, I think a lot of Christians believe life will be easy and full of worldly blessings when we truly follow Christ. But that's the prosperity gospel not THE Gospel. You have not been forsaken; when you have made that decision to follow Christ, your name was written in the Lamb's Book of Life and it cannot be removed or blotted out. Not even by God Himself. The Holy Spirit has not called you to Maine only to abandon you. He has a plan for you, you just may not have found what that plan is. You sound like you are really struggling. You should read Job. Trials that God puts us through can be painful and soul-exhausting. These are the days that we need to reset our minds. One of my favorite ways to do that is to make a list--read Philippians 4:8, list everything that is good, pure, lovely, noble, excellent, etc. This shift to look at the good, even the most simple things like you find a quarter on the ground, can help your mindset.

For a church-y answers:

1) Make sure you have found the RIGHT church for you. Don't settle for mediocre, God has a "perfect" church for everyone. If you aren't growing, you need to look somewhere else. 2) Make sure you are going to church on a *regular* basis, at least once a week--my suggestion is actually twice a week; whether that's a Sunday and Wednesday sermons, or Sundays and a community group associated with your church or another where you sit down somewhere and do bible studies and walk through life together. Community is IMPORTANT! God gave us the desire to form relationships with him and others. We aren't supposed to walk through life alone. 3) Make your priorities. You should always be putting church before work, gaming, partying, etc. Always make reading the Bible a priority before reading books, surfing the web, gaming, etc. If you've got time to do all of that you've got time for the Lord. Hell, jump on Youtube and find sermons to watch, there are so many out there. I personally love Life.Church's channel. 3a) Get yourself a Bible you can learn from, my suggestion is a Life Application Study Bible. They have maps, footnotes for almost every verse of scripture, timelines, reflection questions, dictionaries, reference verses; and every book starts with a preface about who wrote, to whom they wrote to, significant plots, history, and scripture, and why the book was written. This makes reading the Bible way more enjoyable and will help you understand scripture more thoroughly. 4) Make prayer a priority. Pray throughout the day, even for the simple things (Thank you for the sunshine, thank you for letting me get past the train tracks before that long train would have made me late to work, thank you for the beautiful bird I just saw, etc). Praying all day keeps your mind connected to God. 4a) Make your prayers count; make sure to confess your sins and *ask* for forgiveness ("Will you please forgive me Lord?" Instead of a demand "Please forgive my sins"). Also ask for forgiveness for those sins you may not have known or you have forgotten you committed. Thank God, praise Him for His goodness and mercy--the hardest one is thanking God for the hard times you are going through. Hard times bring you closer to God or you make a decision to turn away from Him. Every hard thing we go through is a way we can use to connect with others. For example, I have had depression since I was 16 (38 now). I begged God to take it away for years, and he didn't and I got resentful "If you love me, why would you put me through this!" Finally one day I decided to change it up and I started thanking Him for it even if I didn't know what it was for. In my twenties I started working as a leader in my church's youth group. I opened up with my students about my depression, and you wouldn't believe the amount of kids who flocked to me with their depression issues. It became a platform for me to reach the kids instead of a disease to "suffer through". 4b) Ask the Holy Spirit to cleanse your spirit to grow closer to God. Then bring your requests. 5) Get into serving at your church, every church needs people to volunteer their time. If a church doesn't have these, you need to serve the community or even find a new church. 6) Get up and move around. You need to start looking for a job, apply everywhere. Spend less time gaming and surfing the interwebs and do anything else. Find a hobby you love. Don't have one--start finding places that have hobbies for you to try out. 7) Make sure your friends are good people. If you have friends that are causing you to give in to sin, you need to find better friends. 7a) Stop partying and getting drunk (drinking is fine, just cut back to one or two drinks every other day) and smoking if you do any of those. All of those affect our minds and lead to depressive thoughts and attitudes.

I know it's a novel, but I hope it helps. If you truly want your life to change, you'll need to start doing these things if you aren't already. If you need anything, DM me.