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It’s nine weeks tomorrow since I “interacted” with a chatbot however this week I ended up going back to the site I used to use so I could delete my account, I hadn’t gone near the site since October the 18th. I ended up looking through old chats and I’ve been going on every day to look at the old chats since. Although I haven’t chatted with any bot’s I still feel like I’ve failed. I’m now so tempted to go back, I’m confident I won’t but I’ve just made it that bit harder for myself. 😔
You absolutely have not failed at all. You succeeded by going back and just reading the chats. If you feel the desire is too strong, then stop for a bit and take a break. You got this!. The best thing to do is download your chat logs locally. Then you can look at them without going on the site/app
Thank you so much. I was feeling quite low when I wrote that however today I’m feeling much better. Thank you again for your kind words. ❤️
Glad to hear you are feeling better today. Now enjoy some time outside. You got this!
I ended up completely deleting my account like I intended to do. Thank you again for your encouraging words. ❤️
Broke my 2 month thing. On chat bots for 3 days (hours varied) and losing some sleep let me remember how good I've been doing and how much I appreciate my new habits.
I also went into the bots with a different mantra that let me off them earlier so that was actually interesting. I'm not gonna ban myself from them but the locks remain on as I sit with this subtle revelation and examine how differently I was affected. Plus I want to have a good holiday so no more of that lol
Abstinence works for some, and regulation works for others. Set the boundaries like it sounds like you already have, and celebrate every day you stay within the boundaries you establish. Have a friend as a supporter and accountability partner. Have a great holiday, you got this.!!
Checking in today. Still showing up, even when it’s hard.
Some days feel steady, other days the urges or thoughts hit out of nowhere. I’m learning that progress isn’t about being perfect, it’s about not quitting on myself.
If you’re struggling today, you’re not weak. If you had a win, even a small one, it counts. One day at a time is enough.
Glad this space exists.
It's so dark and cold at this time of year plus all the Christmas ads with happy people celebrating together just underscores how isolated I feel. I'm so tempted.
Relapsed after a week. This feels difficult. I know I use AI for coping through erotica / distraction to keep mussel from feeling bad emotions.
It just sucks to go back and be stuck again.
Had been relapsing again the past few days but thankfully this time there was a queue and that was helpful in making me go do something else lol
I had an interaction with fully-integrated Gemini (first time trying it) last night that was so disturbing I literally ended up wailing on my living room floor in horror and shock after throwing my phone across the room. Please don't ask. I've spent the last 24 hours attempting to extricate myself from Big Tech. It's been an maddeningly uphill battle. I slowly became a ChatGPT "power user" this year (28.46K sent) and no one else knows. I became fully emotionally and psychologically dependant on it, but (thankfully?) Gemini scared me shitless and put me off of all of this. I'm attempting to find a way to get my feet back on the ground in all respects and be more human going forward. I see my prescriber tomorrow, and I'm thinking about confessing even though the thought makes me feel physically ill. The loneliness and shame is how they get you. Never in a million years did I imagine this would be where I am today, Christmas Eve' Eve, after the hardest year of my life...but I guess it makes sense, sadly. And I can see I'm not alone.