You have a small role in the Christening normally, and then buy them something for their birthdays every year until they're grown. There doesn't have to be much more than that.
I'm a long distance godparent who happens to be an athiest.
Gifts for most special occasions.
Basically, in a non religious sense the parents are asking you to be their kids "person" show up for them, help out if needed, if there's siblings maybe show a little favouritism.Not enough to harm anyone, but enough to make the child feel like they are extra special to you.
This is basically it. Be present in their life. If possible make sure to attend matches if athletic or school plays and things like that, not every one but a couple here and there. Be involved in their life without being in the way. As they get older they’ll essentially be like another kid without being your kid.
That’s what I thought but last year the parents said selection boxes were enough. Think they feel their kids have too much already. I’m going to have to start giving them religious instruction or some shit. “Hail Satan!…….louder Robbie……HAIL SATAN!”
Sorry but that’s not great advice. It’s got nothing to do with buying the odd present at special occasions and everything to do with being there for the kid as they grow up. Try to be the person they can talk to as they get older and offer some perspective when they need it. Sure getting a gift for them is good but it’s more important to just support and listen to them
Your advice is so lovely, but its not the expected thing specifically for godparents to do. The above advice is the standard thing expected. I would also add in a few magic handshakes here and there (where you hand over a tenner secretly).
Completely disagree. And I have been a godfather for 18 years now and very proud of my relationship with my god son and god daughter. I have zero Christian beliefs but I really think it can be a positive roll for kids
I think its a great thing. Well done on having that relationship with them - its lovely. But I treat all my nieces and ,nephews like that, not specifically just my god children. So its lovely that you do it. But its not specific to the role of godparents I'm happy to be proven wrong but ive never heard of it being the expectation
Came here to say this. If something should happen to the parents the most important thing is that the kids feel comfortable around you. Try to remember what you thought about adults when you were very young. Be silly. Get down on your hands and knees and play. Make an effort to see them several times a year. You’ll be grand.
This! I will caveat above a bit and say .. individual time and attention. I never get cards. They are in the bin a week later. From a young age, take them out for hot chocolate and buy a present WITH them, let them choose it. They will not remember the book or present but they will remember how you made them feel that day.
Christmas gifts, birthday gifts, when older ask about things their interested in, when they’re little bend down to their level when speaking to them & if they take up sports go to the odd match or whatever, be yourself around them kids can tell if you’re faking it, enjoy it
Godfather here - zero kids myself, it’s usually only birthday and Xmas gift, when they get a bit older money in a card and and the odd day trip somewhere, don’t sweat it, and congratulations!
Show up when you’re invited to family events (birthdays, etc). Try to stay involved. Godparents are a bit antiquated these days I suppose but you can certainly win favor with the kiddo over the years by being present and (if financially applicable) contributing a reasonable gift at relevant holidays - a bit of money can go a long way! I say this as someone who had godparents that I often feared being sent away to if something had ever happened to my parents. You don’t need to be their best pal, just a steady presence in their life sounds lovely.
‘Show up’ is the main thing. Agree with it being somewhat antiquated but I think godparents can play a great role in the kid’s life particularly as they get older - having another trusted adult in their life, etc.
Arrive every Sunday morning at 8am. Bring the child to mass. Then to McDonalds or something similar after. Keep doing this until after they have made their confirmation. Do not take no for an answer.
What? Yes, you have to. You'll be making a solemn vow before the god you all believe in to raise the kid in the Christian faith... this is part of the deal!
Firstly, chances are this is precisely why you were asked. My advice is to pay attention to your godkid, even as a babbling baby. When they start to talk, listen and talk back. Remember what they tell you and read up on their interests so you can at least ask them good questions. Have actual conversations with them.
I have an 11 year old godson. We have great conversations and its a great feeling when his parents text me asking can he give me call because he wants to tell me something.
Presents for sure (zero need to go overboard) but try to be involved where possible. Even better, as the kid gets older, take them for days out or things like that.
If you really want, create a wee savings account for them. Like a tenner a month even. Obviously only if you can afford it, but it would be a lovely thing to present to them when they’re off to college or something.
Highly recommend when their a lil older 5 or 6 you start them on a subscription to a magazine or thing they love.
My three have national geographic kids, the beano and all about history between them over the years all from godparents.
Their 6 8 and 10 this year and still going strong.
The excitment of post each week or month with their name on it and something they have to themselves is fab.
And it gets them reading so its a win all round.
Atheist relations asked us to be "guideparents" to their son. Thought it was a lovely turn of phrase and actually a far better description of the role.
Always remember their birthday, and gift them presents. Same for Christmas.
A very small thing but when they are a baby, hold them and give them attention.
A yearly offer to babysit while the parents go for a few drinks won't go astray. Or a day out with the child when they're older. Aquarium & McDonalds type stuff.
You’ll stand beside the parents and godmother at the font and you’ll have to make a pledge to guide them in the ways of Christ etc.
realistically tho you just need to be the sound adult. Give a little bit extra for birthdays, Christmas etc but mostly spend time with them as regular as you can, kids love genuine attention more than anything else
Put €5.50 a week into a credit union account. On the kids 18th birthday you’ll be able give them a lump of money. You’ll be a hero in the kids eyes and the parent’s eyes as it’ll help with college, car whatever the case may be
Just don’t forget Christmas,birthdays,communion and confirmation. I stopped completely when they turned 18. (If someone offers to wrap a present you bought for them,accept it!My wrapping skills are still being talked about years later!lol)
The christening is a pleasant short time.
After that bring a good godparents might mean building a good relationship with the child.
Remember birthdays Christmas. Spend time with them. Listen to them when they might not want to engage with parents (it happens)😊
Enjoy what can be a very special connection for you and for a child.
I'm the godfather of my best mates kid.
When I was asked and did the ceremony I asked if the kid had a Credit Union/Building Society account. They didn't, so I got some details that I knew and opened her up an account in her name. I put €50 in on her Birthday and Christmas... By the time she's 18 she'll have a little account just for her with a good track record of deposits and no withdraws...
That and don't be distant, don't shy away from looking after them every once and a while. If it's a regular thing you will get to see them grow and flourish.
Go to Christening, buy a present. Then buy presents for Christmas and/or Birthdays as long as you can. I started missing a few in their teens, then mark their 18th and 21st and life events like wedding etc (appreciate those are a long way away). And just be a bit present in their lives and have an interest in them
Act like they are the most exciting person or thing you have ever seen every time you see them, make a huge fuss of how cool they look or how tall they've gotten. Get down to their level when you're chatting to them, and ask them to show you their toys and be so excited about them with them. Kids looooove it when you feed into their excitement and it makes you really memorable, my son remembers and adores the people who seem like they love his favourite thing as much as him. Then a small gift for birthdays I think is standard you can check in with parents on what the favourite theme is. Good luck the fact you care enough to think about it already means you're doing a great job.
To actually be a good God Father your partially responsible for the child's spiritual upbringing. You also make a commitment to helping raise the child according to Christian values. That's literally what youll promise to do in the Church.
To be artificially good God father your partially responsible need to buy the kid birthday and Christmas presents for the next few years.
When we asked people to be godparents to our eldest child, I felt slightly apologetic about it. I didn't want to put pressure on them to act a certain way, I just did it because it's convention.
For our second and third children (twins) we don't have any godparents. I consider it an outdated concept
It's mostly about being present, being part of the child's life. Spend time with them from as early as possible, play with them and be a person they can rely on.
Didn't realize this with my own godson only became apparent with my own sons, the gift doesn't really matter showing up is the big thing. Two out of the four (thankfully one each) always try to get to their matches, school plays ect and frankly they are looked upon as gods, Iv gotten a five minute scolding from a 4y before because I dared to give out about his Godfather.
Present on birthday/christmas, when I was a kid my godfather and his partner used to take me and my brother ice skating/ to the panto at Christmas which is remembered very fondly
I have one godchild, she's my niece. She's 15 now and along with all the Xmas and birthday presents I've made sure that she knows she can talk to me about anything. Even if it's something that she may not want to talk to her parents about, she knows I'm a safe space and I'll give her good advice etc. Her parents also asked me to be guardian to her and her siblings if anything should happen to them so I'm named as that in their Wills too.
More people with children under the age of 18 should know that they need to name legal guardians in their Wills. God forbid if something happened to my sister and her husband and they didn't have legal guardians named, the kids could end up in care while family fights about who gets them.
Present for Christmas and birthdays. Offer to take the child out to give parents a little break (omce baby is old enough). Maybe throw a tenner a week into a credit union account for them to get on their 18th birthday (if thats financially viable)
I'm such a shite godfather that I'm not sure she even knows I'm her godfather. I decided to make her my heir to make up for it when I'm gone (she's 19 and I haven't told her this)
Don’t skip out on the kids milestones even if they are too young to remember. They might see pics of these and wonder why you weren’t there. Generally just turn up whenever you would have liked for an adult to have turned up for you is my advice. I found time matters more to many kiddos than presents for a long time.
Don't: Revolut the parents cash for a Christening gift.
I'm not sure there is that much to do when younger but as they get older try and get to know them and have a one on one relationship. maybe take them somewhere once a year etc.
I think it's nice when it's a friend. Often when its just an uncle, nothing extra is done.
No need to overthink, it’s more of a title than an obligation, similar to the President being a figurehead more than an active politician. Just rock up to the church events when they pop up, other than that nothing is really expected of you
Just became a godfather to my niece 8 months ago, I opened a credit union account for her and have a €10 direct debit a week and will give it to her when she’s 18, will amount to 9 grand ish by that time which will hopefully be a big help
Do: Go to the christening
Don't: Don't drop the kid in the basin
Do: Google calendar their birthday
Don't: Don't forget you're their responsibility if anything happens to the parents so...fingers and toes crossed til they're 18 😁
Our kids' god parents come to their special events if they can. Obviously, when he is the in keeper for the 4th time in the nativity, we dont expect it, but theres generally one of them there. Came to his kick boxing things sometimes, etc. Also, one in particular always gets such sentimental presents its not necessary but very cute!
If they are sound, they picked you for you - that they love you and want you as a role model in their kids lives.
If they are dicks- they just want fancy presents.
Hopefully it's the first one and be greatful they think you are such an amazing person and mayne they aren't pricks.
I got asked for my cousins child - I was totally perplexed because we are not close and I was going to tell her to ask someone else, except my mother had a tantrum. At the christening she said she chose the two Godparents because we had good salaries and she was looking forward to seeing us compete with better presents. She's fucking psycho. 😂😂 I wish I had said no thank you for the kinda invite , but I don't think we are very close.
I never see them, I post the presents and rarely get a thanks. Until I leave it a few days and text to see did they get the post 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠
Its largely ceremonial, your only real duty is being there at the christening and then youre just the guy thats not really related to the kid but kind of acts like their uncle. Ruffle up their hair and ask them if theyre winning, youll be grand
Do: Go to the Christening
Haha noted
You have a small role in the Christening normally, and then buy them something for their birthdays every year until they're grown. There doesn't have to be much more than that.
That was my thinking but is that enough, do u need to visit x amount of times a year etc
I'm a long distance godparent who happens to be an athiest.
Gifts for most special occasions.
Basically, in a non religious sense the parents are asking you to be their kids "person" show up for them, help out if needed, if there's siblings maybe show a little favouritism.Not enough to harm anyone, but enough to make the child feel like they are extra special to you.
This is basically it. Be present in their life. If possible make sure to attend matches if athletic or school plays and things like that, not every one but a couple here and there. Be involved in their life without being in the way. As they get older they’ll essentially be like another kid without being your kid.
I visit my godchild at Christmas and at there birthday. Bring them a reasonable present for each (check with parents what the kid is into)
That’s what I thought but last year the parents said selection boxes were enough. Think they feel their kids have too much already. I’m going to have to start giving them religious instruction or some shit. “Hail Satan!…….louder Robbie……HAIL SATAN!”
Id say spending time with them and being a positive role model in their lives is much more important than yearly gifts.
I mean, that depends on how near they live etc. Birthdays & Christmas would be fine.
There's no expectation for you to be calling around for regular visits.
Im in cork and they're in Galway, cool thanks a million
Buy him a bottle of Buckfast for his Confirmation…
Sorry but that’s not great advice. It’s got nothing to do with buying the odd present at special occasions and everything to do with being there for the kid as they grow up. Try to be the person they can talk to as they get older and offer some perspective when they need it. Sure getting a gift for them is good but it’s more important to just support and listen to them
Your advice is so lovely, but its not the expected thing specifically for godparents to do. The above advice is the standard thing expected. I would also add in a few magic handshakes here and there (where you hand over a tenner secretly).
Completely disagree. And I have been a godfather for 18 years now and very proud of my relationship with my god son and god daughter. I have zero Christian beliefs but I really think it can be a positive roll for kids
I think its a great thing. Well done on having that relationship with them - its lovely. But I treat all my nieces and ,nephews like that, not specifically just my god children. So its lovely that you do it. But its not specific to the role of godparents I'm happy to be proven wrong but ive never heard of it being the expectation
Just be there for them, that's it.. presence over presents. Make sure that child knows who you are and you're there for them
Came here to say this. If something should happen to the parents the most important thing is that the kids feel comfortable around you. Try to remember what you thought about adults when you were very young. Be silly. Get down on your hands and knees and play. Make an effort to see them several times a year. You’ll be grand.
This! I will caveat above a bit and say .. individual time and attention. I never get cards. They are in the bin a week later. From a young age, take them out for hot chocolate and buy a present WITH them, let them choose it. They will not remember the book or present but they will remember how you made them feel that day.
Christmas gifts, birthday gifts, when older ask about things their interested in, when they’re little bend down to their level when speaking to them & if they take up sports go to the odd match or whatever, be yourself around them kids can tell if you’re faking it, enjoy it
Godfather here - zero kids myself, it’s usually only birthday and Xmas gift, when they get a bit older money in a card and and the odd day trip somewhere, don’t sweat it, and congratulations!
Also a godfather - Agree. Couple of quid in a card every birthday and a present every Christmas and you’re more or less sorted.
Show up when you’re invited to family events (birthdays, etc). Try to stay involved. Godparents are a bit antiquated these days I suppose but you can certainly win favor with the kiddo over the years by being present and (if financially applicable) contributing a reasonable gift at relevant holidays - a bit of money can go a long way! I say this as someone who had godparents that I often feared being sent away to if something had ever happened to my parents. You don’t need to be their best pal, just a steady presence in their life sounds lovely.
‘Show up’ is the main thing. Agree with it being somewhat antiquated but I think godparents can play a great role in the kid’s life particularly as they get older - having another trusted adult in their life, etc.
Have a Malteaser in your mouth whenever you speak to them.
Arrive every Sunday morning at 8am. Bring the child to mass. Then to McDonalds or something similar after. Keep doing this until after they have made their confirmation. Do not take no for an answer.
What? Yes, you have to. You'll be making a solemn vow before the god you all believe in to raise the kid in the Christian faith... this is part of the deal!
Firstly, chances are this is precisely why you were asked. My advice is to pay attention to your godkid, even as a babbling baby. When they start to talk, listen and talk back. Remember what they tell you and read up on their interests so you can at least ask them good questions. Have actual conversations with them.
I have an 11 year old godson. We have great conversations and its a great feeling when his parents text me asking can he give me call because he wants to tell me something.
Ask the parents what they expect of you
Presents for sure (zero need to go overboard) but try to be involved where possible. Even better, as the kid gets older, take them for days out or things like that.
If you really want, create a wee savings account for them. Like a tenner a month even. Obviously only if you can afford it, but it would be a lovely thing to present to them when they’re off to college or something.
Highly recommend when their a lil older 5 or 6 you start them on a subscription to a magazine or thing they love. My three have national geographic kids, the beano and all about history between them over the years all from godparents. Their 6 8 and 10 this year and still going strong. The excitment of post each week or month with their name on it and something they have to themselves is fab. And it gets them reading so its a win all round.
Atheist relations asked us to be "guideparents" to their son. Thought it was a lovely turn of phrase and actually a far better description of the role.
Do’s: Presents at birthday and Christmas
Don’ts: Try to be Marlon Brando in the Godfather
You're overthinking it, in modern society it's basically a title in name only.
Always remember their birthday, and gift them presents. Same for Christmas.
A very small thing but when they are a baby, hold them and give them attention.
A yearly offer to babysit while the parents go for a few drinks won't go astray. Or a day out with the child when they're older. Aquarium & McDonalds type stuff.
Buy him a sneaky pint when he's 17!
You’ll stand beside the parents and godmother at the font and you’ll have to make a pledge to guide them in the ways of Christ etc. realistically tho you just need to be the sound adult. Give a little bit extra for birthdays, Christmas etc but mostly spend time with them as regular as you can, kids love genuine attention more than anything else
50 in a card for occasions. Sneaky 20’s on the side.
Just make sure you're doing the religious duties that's the sole purpose of the role.
Cool cool, hopefully i won't burst into flames
Put €5.50 a week into a credit union account. On the kids 18th birthday you’ll be able give them a lump of money. You’ll be a hero in the kids eyes and the parent’s eyes as it’ll help with college, car whatever the case may be
Are you/they religious? If not, fuck all to do.
Go to the christening and don't forget birthdays. If you have your own kids it's usually understandable that you'll not be around all the time
Just don’t forget Christmas,birthdays,communion and confirmation. I stopped completely when they turned 18. (If someone offers to wrap a present you bought for them,accept it!My wrapping skills are still being talked about years later!lol)
The christening is a pleasant short time. After that bring a good godparents might mean building a good relationship with the child. Remember birthdays Christmas. Spend time with them. Listen to them when they might not want to engage with parents (it happens)😊
Enjoy what can be a very special connection for you and for a child.
maybe set up a small savings account in your name and put a small amount away each month (only if you have the ability, be a nice 18th gift
Following as a potentially shit one myself
Christening attendance - birthday cash, attend the occasional match when they’re old enough to play
Gift the toys the child finds fun and the parents find obnoxious if you like a good laugh
First things first. You gotta look out for the Tattaglias, and don't let them off the hook when you're close to taking them out.
Stick their birthday in your calendar with a reminder one or two weeks prior. Send card with gift/cash for birthday
Repeat for Christmas.
Done
I'm the godfather of my best mates kid. When I was asked and did the ceremony I asked if the kid had a Credit Union/Building Society account. They didn't, so I got some details that I knew and opened her up an account in her name. I put €50 in on her Birthday and Christmas... By the time she's 18 she'll have a little account just for her with a good track record of deposits and no withdraws... That and don't be distant, don't shy away from looking after them every once and a while. If it's a regular thing you will get to see them grow and flourish.
Go to Christening, buy a present. Then buy presents for Christmas and/or Birthdays as long as you can. I started missing a few in their teens, then mark their 18th and 21st and life events like wedding etc (appreciate those are a long way away). And just be a bit present in their lives and have an interest in them
It’s a bit like being the cool uncle. Just be sound and spoil the fuck outta the kid regardless of how many times mom says to not spoil them.
Act like they are the most exciting person or thing you have ever seen every time you see them, make a huge fuss of how cool they look or how tall they've gotten. Get down to their level when you're chatting to them, and ask them to show you their toys and be so excited about them with them. Kids looooove it when you feed into their excitement and it makes you really memorable, my son remembers and adores the people who seem like they love his favourite thing as much as him. Then a small gift for birthdays I think is standard you can check in with parents on what the favourite theme is. Good luck the fact you care enough to think about it already means you're doing a great job.
To actually be a good God Father your partially responsible for the child's spiritual upbringing. You also make a commitment to helping raise the child according to Christian values. That's literally what youll promise to do in the Church.
To be artificially good God father your partially responsible need to buy the kid birthday and Christmas presents for the next few years.
Few years can be many I'm 40 and still get my god mother Christmas and birthday presents and receive then from her
When we asked people to be godparents to our eldest child, I felt slightly apologetic about it. I didn't want to put pressure on them to act a certain way, I just did it because it's convention.
For our second and third children (twins) we don't have any godparents. I consider it an outdated concept
Be I or II not III
It's mostly about being present, being part of the child's life. Spend time with them from as early as possible, play with them and be a person they can rely on.
Be a second cooler dad that the kid can talk too if they need to and spoil them on the sly
Didn't realize this with my own godson only became apparent with my own sons, the gift doesn't really matter showing up is the big thing. Two out of the four (thankfully one each) always try to get to their matches, school plays ect and frankly they are looked upon as gods, Iv gotten a five minute scolding from a 4y before because I dared to give out about his Godfather.
Present on birthday/christmas, when I was a kid my godfather and his partner used to take me and my brother ice skating/ to the panto at Christmas which is remembered very fondly
Highly doubtful that it means much to the kid, other than nicer presents from their parents random friends.
Buy stuff the same way you would for of if it was your niece/nephew.
I have one godchild, she's my niece. She's 15 now and along with all the Xmas and birthday presents I've made sure that she knows she can talk to me about anything. Even if it's something that she may not want to talk to her parents about, she knows I'm a safe space and I'll give her good advice etc. Her parents also asked me to be guardian to her and her siblings if anything should happen to them so I'm named as that in their Wills too.
More people with children under the age of 18 should know that they need to name legal guardians in their Wills. God forbid if something happened to my sister and her husband and they didn't have legal guardians named, the kids could end up in care while family fights about who gets them.
Present for Christmas and birthdays. Offer to take the child out to give parents a little break (omce baby is old enough). Maybe throw a tenner a week into a credit union account for them to get on their 18th birthday (if thats financially viable)
I'm such a shite godfather that I'm not sure she even knows I'm her godfather. I decided to make her my heir to make up for it when I'm gone (she's 19 and I haven't told her this)
Remember births and Christmas, start a same savings account for the kid and put them in your will for a tax free payment if you die.
Bring them to gigs, sports events when they are older.
Don’t skip out on the kids milestones even if they are too young to remember. They might see pics of these and wonder why you weren’t there. Generally just turn up whenever you would have liked for an adult to have turned up for you is my advice. I found time matters more to many kiddos than presents for a long time.
Don't: Revolut the parents cash for a Christening gift.
I'm not sure there is that much to do when younger but as they get older try and get to know them and have a one on one relationship. maybe take them somewhere once a year etc.
I think it's nice when it's a friend. Often when its just an uncle, nothing extra is done.
Always buy them class Christmas and birthday presents!
Go to the christening and other milestones and get them nicer presents for birthdays and Christmas. Not a lot more to it than that.
No need to overthink, it’s more of a title than an obligation, similar to the President being a figurehead more than an active politician. Just rock up to the church events when they pop up, other than that nothing is really expected of you
your a glorified gift buyer! congrats! haha
Just be there for as many important moments in the kids life as possible especially once they get older and start to ask you to come
Just make an effort really you’ll be good
Most parents don't expect much from godparents, one of my closest friends is going to be my sons godfathers, just being present is enough for me
Just became a godfather to my niece 8 months ago, I opened a credit union account for her and have a €10 direct debit a week and will give it to her when she’s 18, will amount to 9 grand ish by that time which will hopefully be a big help
Do: Go to the christening Don't: Don't drop the kid in the basin Do: Google calendar their birthday Don't: Don't forget you're their responsibility if anything happens to the parents so...fingers and toes crossed til they're 18 😁
Our kids' god parents come to their special events if they can. Obviously, when he is the in keeper for the 4th time in the nativity, we dont expect it, but theres generally one of them there. Came to his kick boxing things sometimes, etc. Also, one in particular always gets such sentimental presents its not necessary but very cute!
If they are sound, they picked you for you - that they love you and want you as a role model in their kids lives.
If they are dicks- they just want fancy presents.
Hopefully it's the first one and be greatful they think you are such an amazing person and mayne they aren't pricks.
I got asked for my cousins child - I was totally perplexed because we are not close and I was going to tell her to ask someone else, except my mother had a tantrum. At the christening she said she chose the two Godparents because we had good salaries and she was looking forward to seeing us compete with better presents. She's fucking psycho. 😂😂 I wish I had said no thank you for the kinda invite , but I don't think we are very close.
I never see them, I post the presents and rarely get a thanks. Until I leave it a few days and text to see did they get the post 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠
Acknowledge their birthday and maybe Christmas! Send the odd text asking how they are or pay the odd visit here and there, that should do!
Its largely ceremonial, your only real duty is being there at the christening and then youre just the guy thats not really related to the kid but kind of acts like their uncle. Ruffle up their hair and ask them if theyre winning, youll be grand
Make the child an offer he can’t refuse.
Go big for m the Christmas and Bday presents. Always remember one of my siblings godparents used to go totally OTT for all bdays. Never even met them.