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Well, at least other people who are too broke right now are benefiting from your donations. I don't have the answer but it's good if you and your kids to donate what you can't use. I understand your frustration.

50 years ago when my 3 brothers and I were in our early 20's we decided to give each other the best gift ever: nothing. When we were kids we had to wait with incredible anticipation (Sears catalog showed up in September) until Christmas to get what we wanted. But as we got older and employed, if we needed anything during the year, you would just go buy it. We found ourselves wasting a phenomenal amount of time, with increasing anxiety wandering around stores trying to find something "special". After the decision, we all got together on Christmas, cooked a great meal, had some drinks, told stories, took some photos for the memories and just enjoyed each others company. We replaced guilt, and waste with a holiday spirit.

So sorry OP on behalf of your mom. My "greatest generation " grandmother used to do the same thing to me as a kid getting me gifts of clothes that were too small and way out of style date, dry rotted shoes, broken toys, dried up art supplies with missing pieces, etc. That lady was mean and abusive to the point that even her pastor hurried her funeral service to get to the potluck portion faster. Her landscape guy exclaimed at the potluck that at least the old lady prepaid for the food and didnt charge us for the "privilege " of eating the sandwiches. Everyone obligated to be there had a good, dark, tension breaking laugh at that.

My mom is learning that all us younger folks live in condos and don’t have storage space. one big gift is far superior to 20 “junk gifts” that we will toss when we get home. But it took decades to get that thru to her. It’s like in her mind, it was all about watching us open presents and not about whether or not we would like what we opened. I actually was very happy about the Keurig and pods I got this year and thankful it didn’t come with a bunch of candy and plastic crap I’m gonna throw out.

Boomers go to is weaponized gift giving

Boomers are the original hoarders I swear! Millennial here with two boomer parents and my mom is worse then my dad but like yes, she will buy my son the most obnoxious things (not even age appropriate) he's only 20 months but buys toys that are recommended 3+ or fire trucks bc that's something my dad likes it's just gross! She refuses to let go of objects and god forbid you move anything in her house she loses it, but is the first person to rummage through someone else's stuff! Literally has rooms in her house that nobody can go in, cabinets full of dishes for "display" and they wonder why I am a minimalist and floor sleeper 😒

Don't feel bad about donating either my mom will try and gaslight me by saying you better not get rid of this stuff, bc she knows sub consciously it's crap she's buying and just wants to exert power and control in true boomer psychological abuse fashion

My MIL is the same way. Two of the gifts she gave this year were completely out of left field and felt like just getting something to give. One of them was a signed Brett Hull hockey card when he played for the St. Louis Blues. I am not a Blues fan and I never followed Brett Hull. My daughter got a Daenerys Targanyen figurine. My daughter is 10, never watched Game of Thrones and has never shown any interest in the character.

I know Christmas is not about the getting, but these just feel like gifts for the sake of gifts. I like the idea of donating these unwanted items. My MIL would never know.

My mother definitely used my family as an excuse for her (clearance) shopping addiction. The emotional cost of accepting these gifts was never worth it for me. It was obvious she wasn’t giving for the joy, but for the coerced thanks.

Gave my boomer parents a one gift limit and my mom found a way to put numerous small gifts into one bag on year one.  She's gotten so much better, but those boundaries need to be enforced 

“The size she wants her to be” for me that alone is enough to cut contact.

She can spend her money however she wants, you can do whatever with it- but this sentence makes me think you need less contact. “With my daughter the size she wants her to be.” That shit is so damaging. That part is where I would lose my every loving mind.

It blows my mind how many MIL'e literally think our kids wouldn't have Christmas at all without their gifts. I asked my MIL to just chip in for my daughter's after school drawing classes as it would be more enriching than a toy. She did. Then she asked what else to get her.... No, you already got her something. She's grateful. "But she won't have anything to open on Christmas!" You know, cause we didn't get her things, Santa didn't get her things, aunts, uncles and her other grandparents. I swear they feel like if they don't physically open something or have the most presents, they lose at the Christmas game.

At least yours doesn't try to buy the toys your daughter asked for from Santa. If my MIL gets a whiff of what was asked of Santa she will try to buy it like she is one upping Santa! She actually did this one year when we visited them before the holidays allowing them to open presents a week early with them. " Look it's the green monster truck you asked Santa for! Grandma got it!" Thanks grandma. Now we have to go visit Santa again a few days before Christmas to tell him something different, and Santa will have to exchange the monster truck his elves already got for her.

"Stuff" should only be gifted if you are certain that the recipient really wants or needs the item. Otherwise I believe it's best to stick with something that can be consumed - but again, only within the parameters of what the recipient will actually enjoy. Do not give cosmetics to someone unless you are certain they want and will use the specific item. Don't gift vodka to a person who likes scotch or bourbon. If you don't know, ask. And for children, ask them and the parents. Often the family would rather have tickets to an event or some kind of lessons, or a donation to a college fund or a vacation fund. Just my opinion.

One year my step father and his wife bought out an entire clearance section of toys and gave them to their grandchildren. It was a lot of random things and most of the kids were confused as it wasn’t anything they had asked for. We took them home and donated them to a shelter. Other Christmases growing up were ridiculous as my step mother and her sister tried to out gift each other and we would spend hours opening gifts with Stockings taking an hour on their own. We had the huge stockings. Needless to say from the start I’ve kept a grip on my families Christmas. We don’t buy a ton of crap and we go by a 5 gift rule. Most importantly we stick to a budget and don’t go into debt for gifts.

Yes!!! It was so bad this year. My mom gives out quantity over quality when it comes to gifts. And with my kids she gives SOO much crap. Then gets mad when we want to leave toys at her 4,000sq/ft 5 bedroom house because we don’t have room! She gave us a freaking trampoline! For our 3 year old!! I have no where to put it!!

Also I was pissed because I deliberately told my mom not to get me kitchen towels as I don’t like the ones I already have (that she gave me 8 years ago) and want to buy a set that I actually like. Guess who got a set of ugly kitchen towels AND oven mitts. It’s just making extra work for me to go to Goodwill to drop stuff off.

Sorry, I was not happy this year.

Wow this is a "normal" boomer thing?? My mom bought me a Play-Doh dentistry set and a husband pillow. I'm almost 30 and have a house. I sent her a list. 😐

When it comes to Boomers, gift giving isn't about what makes the receiver happy... it's all about making THEM happy. I learned that a LONG time ago. Their egos simply have to be stroked, especially around the holidays.

"Thirty-six presents? That's two less than last year!"

My favorite part is when my aunt ships junk to my mom, who then ships it to me. They spend more in postage and shipping fees than the items are worth.

So much Boomer stuff ended up in the dumpster or donated. It took years to get my parents to split the cost of an 'experience' around Christmas as the 'present' we all give to each other. Show/movie/meal/gift certificates. My older gen-x brother and his wife are obsessed with a 'thing' you must unwrap for the holiday so now onto them. I'm an xennial (1980) and don't have this obsession with literal things. He's 2 years older. Don't get it. Pissed that it continues. No one really needs more stuff. Team Junk Toss. Don't add to the junk.

Edit: most people don't need more stuff. My husband grew up dirt poor and yes, more stuff is needed there.

Tell her straight up for next year—you don’t want any gifts and if she does it anyway, everything is going straight to donation.

She sounds controlling. You need to create hard boundaries with people like this.

God, every year for the last several years I have to tell my parents to PLEASE not buy me junk and made in China nicnacs at a Christmas market. This year the obligatory Christmas market gift was a mason jar with the ingredients for oatmeal cookies. I don't mind oatmeal cookies, it's something I'll eat but I'm not particularly crazy about them. I'm just going to throw the mason jar out. I would be very surprised if there was any sort of actually "sourced" ingredients and not just the same flour and white sugar I get at the super market. It's almost like the people at other faires that sell drop-ship items and the same royalty free 3D printed things.

Once again I want to tell them to save the money or just give me the money instead of buying a forced gift. I sincerely appreciate the sentiment that the holiday ritual needs to be completed, and am relieved it isn't some other plastic or sheet metal, "sentimental" White Elephant that was made in Guangdong and is destined for the garbage.

I talked to my mom this year about changing up the family gift exchange because we're in an apartment with no space and too many things already. I asked this year for consumable things like food/alcohol/snacks, and maybe next year we can do some kind of group gift as a family (my idea was getting a hot pot and ingredients and all do hot pot together) and she was into it. My husband and I got loads of snacks now, a bunch of fun new stuff I might not have tried on my own (my husband and I have our comfort snacks we don't really stray from lol) so it's been really fun and much less stress than dealing with a ton of junk

My parents do this every single year. I ask for one, maybe two tops, reasonably priced things that I actually want or need. And every year, without fail, I get none of the things I asked for. Instead, they load me up with Temu junk and CVS discount garbage that I immediately donate or regift.

The worst part is that they spend hundreds on stuff I consider literal trash just so the tree looks “full,” when that same money could’ve gone toward the one thing I actually requested. I’d honestly rather get nothing. My house is small and already full of shit I’m constantly trying to declutter.

This year, even after having a serious conversation with them about not doing this again, they still did it. So I left a bunch of the crap they bought me at their house. When they confronted me, I told them straight up: I asked you not to buy me useless crap I won’t use, and you did it anyway. They acted like I was ungrateful, but I’m done pretending this behavior is okay.

For context, my siblings and I are in our mid to late 30s. And every year I ask my parents what they want for Christmas, and I get them exactly that. Nothing more, nothing less - because they too have a cluttered house.

When the fuck will they learn?!?! It sucks all the spirit out of the holiday. It ends up being a daunting and exhausting experience I end up dreading instead of enjoying 😖

Why are they like this

So this explains how thrifts get all these new with tags items.

We boycotted family Xmas this year and it was so peaceful on the 26th to not wake up to a huge pile of weird socks and pointless stocking stuffers. It’s all junk. Just ask people what they want

After living many years, I admit that I have a lot of useless stuff lying around. Emotionally hard to get rid of it. A smaller house would probably help.

offended and hurt if things don’t fit

New level of stupidity unlocked 💪. She is offended that the clothes she chose don't fit? After you told her the correct sizes? How does that even work?

We spend a week donating everything

Not too bad for an end-of-year activity.

Hilarious photo, by the way. Next year, don't bother putting a tree there.

My mom has SO much stuff. My inheritance will be angels, old calendars (the pictures are too pretty to throw away!), and Bath and Body Works products.

My boomer mother just spent I think $2-300 buying so much crap for my family. Just... why?? Things we won't use, won't/can't wear, even actively dislike. I told her before she came that my child already had a certain toy and she bought a duplicate anyway. 🤦‍♀️

We also live in a small place, so a bunch of it will go straight to donations. But this way I have to waste a bunch of my time dealing with it. 

Try posting to your local Buy Nothing group on Facebook. Take pics of everything and just tell folks it's a porch pick up. Don't stress about this year's toys. But try to give away last year's. And any clothes that don't fit. Lots of people are fine getting late Christmas presents for their family so long as their kid likes it.

Yep, it's always plastic crap that they don't care about after an hour. Or clothes they can't fit for 2 years. We've had to donate so much because my husband's step mother gifts us items that are 2 years too big. Ex a 4T when our daughter was 2. So of course it goes to the back of the closet and we forget about it until she's outgrown it.

Older people love to shop because they are bored and it gives them something to do, not to mention the dopamine hit they get from buying stuff. Tell your mom she can give your kids whatever she wants as long as she gives you the receipt to return whatever you want to return.

This is my MIL. I finally had to tell her that she was wasting money buying gifts our family won’t use or clothes we won’t wear. In recent years, she’s moved to buying gifts that we ask for but loves to say shit like “how do you like the air fryer I bought you?” It’s so weird. All that said, I do appreciate the sentiment and understand that it’s a privilege to receive gifts - it just feels like she’s trying to score points in a game that nobody else is playing.

Boomers are keeping Hobby Lobby in business. I live with a craftaholic and it’s just absolutely absurd how much money you can sink on garbage you can super glue together.

Oh good, it's not just my mom. This year I was gifted my third air fryer. I gave away the last two.

I don't want one. I will never use it. I don't have the space for it if I even wanted it.

This is a huge reason I hate Christmas. She's weaponized gifting. Buys me stuff she wants me to gave despite the many times I've told her I don't want anything. And if you don't fawn over it and her generosity, you're an ungrateful child, and she will make you feel like shit every time it comes to mind that you gave away X, Y, Z items. 🙄

MIL sent 8 boxes of duplicate toys, clothing, etc. 7 boxes got donated to good will. I hope it makes someone else’s christmas bright- we don’t need it- and in-laws never come around so it felt awesome giving it all away!!’

When you own a lot of stuff then the stuff starts to own you

Less stuff is the way

My (adult) kids send me their links to their Amazon Christmas wish lists. It’s been so convenient and helpful.

Yeah my mother also tries to act like my kids wouldn’t get anything for Christmas if it wasn’t for her. 

And honestly? We buy them each 1 or 2 things they actually want, but can’t really buy anything else because she’s already covered the piles of plastic crap. So thanks mom, can’t even buy my kids Christmas presents because everything has to be about you. 

No advice, just solidarity ❤️

My MIL has toned it down a little as of late, but out of necessity as she’s not as mobile or financially sound as she once was.

My mom tries to overcompensate for the competition. She luckily adheres to our “rule” of no more than 3 presents per kid, but she still strays away from what my kids specifically ask for, then gets frustrated when it’s something they don’t really want or have already.

Yep. I was expecting my parents to get my kids maybe one gift each. But they bought them so much stuff. I'm trying to be grateful.. but they got my non verbal autistic son walkie talkies. He tried to figure it out and kinda says 'hi' into it. But honestly it kinda hurt. They just don't know my kids well and I feel like they don't understand his struggles.

This photo really sums up how some Boomers shit on the spirit of Christmas with overconsumption. 

I’m so tired of my my millennial mini house getting filled up with thoughtless junk my kids didn’t ask for and already have!!!!

But what is the answer? Why do boomers have shit all over the place, would rather buy 20 items for 1$ instead of 1 item for 20$ and on top of that, you’ll often find the bags, boxes or wrapping for “something else” their homes are dark, cluttered, and have shit all over the place and walls. At least you turn it into positive energy by donating!

We had to go low contact for this and many other reasons.

They still send shit monthly but it's getting harder for them to attempt to get it right as the kid is getting older and they just don't know them. 

All they had to do was be respectful and follow our very simple requests but "I'm not going to change," so here we are. Things are given to the kid on bday and Christmas only. Flag day is not a gift giving holiday so it goes away.

Also the kid has been sent so many rosaries that they could open their own Vatican gift shop. How many rosaries does a single person need over their whole lifetime??? Donate them back to the church! I'm not your relic disposal service.

I have this exact same problem with my in-laws filling my house with crap despite asking them not to for many years. I used to attempt to rehome it but grew very resentful of the time and energy it was taking to sort, pack, store and haul it away so now it all just goes in the recycling bin. It’s just another chore they create for me.

That's some sort of narcissistic bs

That’s a lot of crap.

She didn’t even get them the right sizes? That’s so ridiculous.

just be like me, disagree to the point where your entire family doesn’t want anything to do with you.

i haven’t heard from them in 8+ months

My mum is exactly the same. We travelled to her for Christmas with a tiny hatchback car. That doesn't stop her loading us up with complete garbage

Yeah, my mom would just buy everyone a bunch of stuff and clothes that no one would ever want to wear, she was asked not to get, and was actually told we didn't actually need anything. We usually gift experiences and events together. Or something very meaningful.

We also ended up just donating whatever she got the family.

The Marshalls stop for all gifts is a dick move for those out here who need to hear this! It’s as obvious as drug store Christmas shopping…everyone knows your lazy and cheap…give nothing or a gift card

THIS! My mother is an irresponsible AF Boomer who insists on buying absolute garbage endlessly. It drove her to multiple bankruptcies and she still doesn't learn. But wants to complain how she has no funds for stuff she actually needs.

It's the primary reason I generally will have nothing to do with her.

I know she won’t listen, because boomers, but tell her to get them experience stuff, like passes to the zoo or things like that.

My boyfriend's boomer parents get us borderline useless stuff every year. They ask what we want and then do the exact opposite 🤣 Last years gift to me was a cheap UV nail light. I had no idea why and didn't do my own nails at the time. I donated it to the thrift store. This year I received a pair of fleece lined leather gloves...that were 2 sizes too big. Sigh another one for the donation pile.

Get them a laser level next gift cycle. The pic on the bottom right is making my eye twitchy

This is literally my mother.

If you ever figure it out, let me know.

My MIL is the same way. She grabs random stuff from the clearance bins so people have multiple gifts to unwrap. She's gotten me shirts that were literally 4 sizes too big, and looked like something Dorothy from Golden Girls would wear (no shade to Dorothy but uh that ain't me). The kids get tons of plastic crap. We just thank her and when we get home at least half the gifts go in a donation bag. I try to assume she means well

This thread is very refreshing to read. My Boomer mom has been like this for years, and I have been frustrated and even angry about it for years. It was much better this year than it has been in previous years in terms of the volume of gifts being less and the gifts being mostly more practical or interesting than in the past. She also took my 6 and 8 year old daughters to Ross for a shopping spree a few weeks before Christmas to pick out some of their own gifts, and my girls loved it.

However, she did give Catholic books to all of my kids, including my 21 year old son who she knows stopped going to church when he was 15. She's very passive aggressive about shoving Catholic propaganda at us. It's a major source of my dislike of being around her.

Start the donation pile right in front of her and tell her “this would not be happening if you LISTENED”

I was ready to chide you for being ungrateful until I got to the part about her bullying your daughter about her body size, and not caring if the stuff she gives you even fits/is usable. WTF? “Yeah, here’s a bunch of stuff you can’t even use, Merry Christmas!”

Anyone who uses gift giving as a passive-aggressive way to be a bully has a special place in Hell set aside just for them.

I would offer some perspective. It makes your mother feel useful and loved at a time of the year in which many people feel alone. Your mother won’t be with you forever, so let her do her thing and just appreciate the time you have left with her.

She must want to feel more involved, demonstrate love, feel like there's reciprocity in your relationship, feel useful, needed, cared about. I'm not saying you don't do that.

Tell her that instead of presents next year she can take the kids to a movie or lunch or the arcade or whatever, binge a series they like, spend time.

It took 10 years to talk my mom and dad into 1 bigger gift and then stocking stuffers/snacks, but we finally did it!

Sounds like you need to tell her she can either resprct your wishes or lose access to her grandchildren. If she can't respect tgis line tgen there are others she will cross.

It is great that you donate the poorly purchased items. Truly thoughtful parents/grandparents would try to understand and accept

I need to make a specific list, otherwise it's the same.

That is ridiculous when the pile of “gifts” is so high your family can’t even enjoy your tree. It’s so much more fun to give the parents money to buy the grandkids clothes while you get to go do something with them as a grandmother. My favorite childhood memories are the things I did with my grandmother.

My girlfriend’s mom bought everyone multiple khaki clips for our car visors to hold sunglasses.

I have a dark gray interior and a built in holder for my sunglasses, guess I’m doing the Goodwill thing, too. 👀

Your mom kind of sounds like my MIL. This year, she finally got it. Instead of buying a lot of clothes that barely fit, she got one or two things and balanced with gift cards.

I stopped using gift bags for kids birthday/Christmas presents and started using age appropriate storage solutions. One year, I got one of the kids a treasure chest that was great for toys. The only things I put in it were one nautical themed outfit in the right size and appropriate for the upcoming season, a couple of nautical themed bath toys, and a bag of chocolate coins for "treasure." The parents always seem to love it.

Yikes

It’s like that home shopping network episode of South Park.

Oh my god; everyone else somehow also has my MIL!! You’ve just described her to a tee. I can’t even fully explain the degree to which this is her. I send you all condolences.

Ive had to tell my dad to stop getting me random things because it's almost always from the Goodwill store and he just buys things because "it's a good deal". His house is cluttered and it's driving my stepmom crazy. My house is also on the smaller size and I don't want it filled with random shit.

My grandmother consistently did the same when it came to clothing. As we got older, it only got worse and my brothers and I struggled with body image issues growing up, I still do as a 25 year old woman. My mother ended up going no contact with her for her benefit and ours, for a plethora of reasons. This is entirely frustrating, but I would look into other aspects of your life that she could be adding stress into, and start setting boundaries for your kids sake.

She's got to be hurting your daughter's self-esteem, even if she pretends she doesn't care. I would give her full permission to get in Grandma's face next time. "Grandma, this won't fit me. You'll have to take it back." Cue explosion. "You clearly don't see or love me as the person I am when you constantly give me clothes that are too small for me. It's hurtful and wrong and it makes me not want to spend holidays with you anymore." And back her up 100%.

For that generation stuff=status

So she doesn't follow directions or suggestions and gets pissed when the clothes don't fit or are not something the kid would wear?

Make her come along with you to take the stuff back, standing in the return line or dropping off at Goodwill.

Finally got my parent to agree to no gifting and stuck with it. What a relief, it made the holiday so much nicer.

My MIL got me so much crap when I was pregnant that I had to start returning it to her.

I had over 100 outfits that were newborn size. My daughter was that size for 2 weeks. I warned MIL that I could change her outfits 3x a day and still wouldn't get through it all.

We had literally 100s of those white tops with snaps at the bottom, and 100s of onesies of varying sizes. I don't know why.

She was mad af that I planned on breastfeeding so she bought me a ton of bottles and bottle prep stuff. Multiple bottle cleaning machines too for some reason. Also a used and dirty breast pump.

She bought us some very unsafe stuff. Along with the filthy breast pump, she got us a very used car seat, a baby sling that was very poorly made and absolutely would have smothered our child (we could fully submerge a small/medium sized dog in it), and a ton of toys that were choking hazards. She also often got us bags full of second hand stuff that was dirty, and in one case it had actual rubbish (old food packets, empty cans, etc) in with the baby stuff. She also gave us a bunch of items that were recalled for safety reasons.

I returned donated what was safe (And made sure MIL knew) and threw away items that were clearly dangerous.

I’m in the same boat. Literally sitting on my patio in tears this morning because I still can’t figure out where the hell to put all this stuff. I’ve told her every year that we don’t have room for things. We try to get very specific lists but she always buys way more than what’s on them. She gets so upset if we say that we don’t like something and always talks about how over budget she goes every single year.

My MIL was “bragging” how her mother taught her not to throw anything away….

Her mother was alive during the great depression (of the 1920/30/40’s, not the current one)… MIL has a lot of trinkets and such that she’s trying to pass on to my husband, his siblings, and the grandkids… it doesn’t hold a sentimental value to any of them like it does her.

My husband is 45… I found a set of his water color paints from when he was in school (when we needed those)… so probably like 35+ years old… why? No clue… not worth questioning either. 🤦🏻‍♀️

What is it with boomers and a clearance table at Marshall’s? It’s like a homing beacon for them.

When I was a kid we had a tradition where the grandparents would make Christmas Eve boxes for the kids. My silent gen grandma would put in pajamas, hot cocoa, popcorn, a VHS tape (back in the day), and a stuffed animal. It was such a fun childhood memory. Now that my boomer mom is the grandparent, she fills these boxes with obnoxious junk toys from Marshall’s. I’ve asked her to just stick to the tradition, and even offered to take it over myself. Nope, she insists. This year she got my kids some rock painting kit that was on clearance, that they relentlessly bothered me to open and immediately got paint everywhere. So unnecessary and wasteful.

I even gave a list of possible items she could put in the box. Obviously VHSs are not longer a thing but I suggested gaming gift cards for my older son and A&W gift cards for my younger. Nope, shitty squishy fidgets and rock painting kits. I have no idea what their obsession is with refusing to buy what’s on the list.

For every birthday and Christmas recently my mum has bafflingly given me a load of long handled teaspoons. I've no idea why or what you're supposed to do with them, but have just donated about 15 to charity.

I feel your pain! My partner’s grandmother is the worst. She always has gifts for my kid. It’s always something totally inappropriate to something downright dangerous for the kid’s age, usually some cheap thing from Dollar tree that breaks after 1 use. When she buys clothes, it looks like mini versions of what she wears. I have told her numerous times not to give gifts. My kid couldn’t care less and tosses it anyway. Clothes gets donated after some time sitting brand new with tags in the dresser and eventually becomes too small. I feel bad and guilty every time I see it. Toys are kept in the same manner with me feeling bad and will eventually be donated to a toy foundation of the area.

My boomer mom would force me to wear these clothes gifts. I would have to tolerate being in an uncomfortable, sometimes itchy, and not of my taste piece of clothing because it was a gift. Always a guilt trip. I absolutely don’t want to do that to my kid.

I'm with you OP.  

I know my in-laws (and my own parents to some degree) are well-intentioned at least (unlike your situation with the clothes buying...)

But I have what I need!  I don't mind a small, thoughtful gift or two - I do have room for some mementos of the people I love - but otherwise I have what I need and just want to spend time together.

My ex's parents were crazy when it came to junk presents. As someone who grew up with 1-3 meaningful, quality presents, it was insane to see the mountains and mountains of junk, no one wants, needs, or has space for.

Classic boomer attitude with Christmas presents. It’s not about doing something nice for you, it’s all about what they want and how they think you should act/dress/cook/live your life in general.

Sometimes it’s a passive-aggressive message. My boomer mother sent us cutlery for xmas. My sister verified my suspicions: that our mother doesn’t think we have enough forks. Sister told me Mom said to her, “I can never find any forks when I’m down there visiting.”

We have more than enough forks. I have tried to explain to my mom that if there are none in the drawer, see if the dishwasher magnet says “clean” and then grab one from there