Pretty much the title. We have a boomer in our neighborhood who uses a shovel to scoop all of his black lab’s poop and flings it into the middle of the road.
Apparently he doesn’t want it in his yard, there are always several piles of it in the middle of the road at the end of his driveway.
We have to drive around it every single time we leave the subdivision, as it’s pretty much the only way out of the subdivision/hoa.
He leaves a shovel propped up against the lamp post at the end of his driveway.
I’m not sure what he thinks he’s accomplishing by flinging it into the middle of the road.
I bet late at night it would be possible to use that shovel to fling that pile of poop over his house and into his backyard.
I mean… hypothetically.
I’d Return to Sender’s front door.
In a bag…on fire…ding dong. Just sayin
It's poop again!
He called the shit poop!
Thanks for getting my reference! 🤣
SPLAT!
And take the goddam shovel.
That would be theft. Now if dog shit happens to end up all over the handle and shaft…
Diabolical... I like it
If you miss, the front porch or roof get you points. Hypothetically.
Pull a Walter White slinging a pizza on the roof.
One man’s lacrosse stick is another man’s shovel. Just saying
You have more than earned from a former Lacroose player.
🏅
I would hypothetically aim for his roof. Hopefully, it would build up quite a bit before the next rain.
Yeah, but then it would get into the gutters and turn into a slurry, get washed through the downspouts and all over his yard. Wouldn't want that,
Put it on the roof
hypothetically, I’m just adding, that not making it over the house and landing on his roof is possibly more satisfying
Yeah, shit-stained stanky shingles…
<shudder>
[ Removed by Reddit ]
Middle of his driveway. At the end is good enough.
This is hilarious though. Perfect way to respond to an HOA. The boomer should start throwing shit on everyones home. They are cucks afterall. They won't do anything but call some board of Karen's to complain.
Call the city and report the improper waste disposal. He’ll get fined and made to stop.
This^
There has to be some city/ township ordinance that prohibits this.
That is definitely littering. And may also be a stormwater violation if you live somewhere where they're strict about that.
It’s a rural area, so not sure if there’s a local ordinance.
I’m surprised the HOA allows that.
I’m sure they don’t allow it.
It's a rural area. What HOA?
https://preview.redd.it/edfcm815ev9g1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cccb7e622f3466587699d3771991e7f12f48acff
Rural areas where I am from require farmers to scrap mud and manure off of public roadways when left behind from tractor tires.
Waste pickup serviced ?
This is one of the exceedingly rare instances where I'd genuinely be cheering for the HOA to impose fines and take action against some disgusting old fuck for doing this.
Exactly this. Why is the HOA not actively doing their job
Because HOA's don't exist for this purpose: their claimed purpose is to protect homeowner value, their actual purpose has always been 'teach these disrespectful lazy millennials a lesson.'
Boomer is probably the HOA president.
100% agree.
My HOA fines me every week because I refuse to put my trash cans away. 25 bucks a week and I don't have to trudge my ass around the side of the yard in the cold?
I pay that fine. Damn good deal.
If I was a bitter fuck? I'd pay the fine and keep shoveling shit into the road.
As a career Facilities Manager I'm a huge proponent of having your fines have teeth so shit like this doesn't happen. You should be afraid of fines.
Bet someone could rub the handle of that shovel in the dog shit pile
This is the perfect revenge. Take the shovel, scoop the poop from the street and drop it next to the lamp post. Put the shovel handle side down in the poop leaning against the lamppost where you found it
You.
I like you.
I needed that evil chuckle today, so thanks for that.
So fling it back. Problem solved.
Onto his roof.
Take a video; provide to animal control and or police. Had a similar situation and they shut it down quick. It's disgusting and against the law.
Would be a shame if someone tossed it back into his yard every night.
Go the extra mile and get that poop on the roof. If the owner doesn’t deal with it it’ll cost more than any civic fine in the long run.
Excellent point. Any job worth doing, is worth doing right.
It would be far less effort for old mate to collect the shit into a bag and put in his bin 🤷♂️
A misdemeanor in Virginia.
Fuck HOAs.... but this is what they're made for!
Record him doing it and report him for littering
Do you live in Bremerton WA? Cause I’ve got one of those neighbors and it boggles the mind that there are more than one in existence.
Actually it’s Colorado.
Get two project buckets and some weather stripping from your preferred home improvement store. If you don’t already have a cordless drill, paint mixer attachment, and ¼- ½” bit or hole saw attachment, pick those up. A step (drill) bit is ideal for this project.
Drill holes just above the bottom of bucket one. Cut out the bottom of bucket two, leaving just enough of the bottom of bucket two for attaching the weather stripping. Be strategic with your holes, you may want them all around or 1-3 bigger holes pointed in a specific direction.
Make sure one end of the weather stripping is attached to bucket one, the other end to bucket two. Use good adhesive at both ends of the weather stripping. Friction fit for the rest. You want it to make a good seal when you set it up, and pill away and create a situation where it won’t seal when your target tries to shove the two buckets back together. Instead of one stop for the 360°, maybe quarter it.
Test with water to ensure proper operation. When you put the bucket with no bottom into the bucket with holes drilled in the sidewall the system should hold water until the inner bucket is lifted, and then you should have wet shoes.
When you have it working as desired… assemble. Add in dog poop and fill halfway with water. Mix, adding water and poo until you have the desired blend consistency. Leave room for about half a gallon of additional water and prepare for delivery,
Get a half gallon jug of hot water for topping off.
Carry using the handle of the outer bucket, then place at your neighbor’s front door. Remove handle of outer bucket, leaving only the handle of inner bucket. Top off with hot water to bring out the aromatics and ensure no matter what, there will be spillage.
Ring doorbell and run. If all goes well your neighbor will grab the bucket handle and unleash the stream of shit water on their shoes and into the entryway of their home. And if you setup the weather seal right it’ll tear away and make sure the buckets drain even if neighbor slams the inner bucket back down.
If you want to go the extra mile a bit of PVC pipe can arc the poo water so you could engineer coverage up to the knees.
Depending on how awful your neighbor is, you can obtain various additional scents in concentrated form from your local sporting goods store. Plenty of concentrated musk and urine scents to choose from. Your neighbor will get to enjoy these added scents long after the initial mess is cleaned up.
Don't you have a Department of Public Health so you can report this person like an adult would do?
Yes that’s probably true, haven’t looked into it. It’s a very rural area, though.
Please stop using "but it's rural" as an excuse. Most rural areas usually tend to care more about the quality of their water. Ground water is critical everywhere. Because of the way modern dogs are fed, their waste isn't useful for fertilizing anything. It is literal WASTE. Your lazy neighbor throws his dogs 💩 in the street. In turn, it gets into the runoff of rain or snow melt. It IS pollution.
If it is close to the end of his driveway can you run over it with your car, then pull into his driveway a few times. Really spread it out on the driveway.
Complain to the HOA, if you have one. If not, redistribute the feces to his front door.
Yes in our town, cut grass put in the yard is a fine-worthy thing due to imposing a danger to those on bikes/motorcycles so I bet there has to be an ordinance.
Wate till night and fling the poo onto his windows or throgh them if they are open
What church does he attend? Tattle to the preacher.
I do not have a dog. I have an old hockey stick. I just shoot OTHER PEOPLES dog shit out on the road from my front yard. Quick and easy and I got a great wrister. Do not use a slap shot. It gets messy.
Go knock on his door ant TELL him to knock it off.
In my neighborhood, he'd wake to find it all stuck to his front door.
Yeah, I have noticed that he has an abnormal amount of cameras around his house though.
I think he misunderstood what “skid marks” are and where they go.
Video, Video, video
What's the shovel made of? I have some ideas.
ETA - I know it's unlikely, but I hope it's aluminum. That's the one I have the best idea for.
Looks like a wooden handle.
Put in a bag, light it, and leave it on his porch
Poop on the roof roof!
I mean, the fact that it's his own dogs shit is gulag level criminal. I own 4 dogs and pick up a massive amount of shit every day when I walk them.
(my dogs don't have access to the front yard - they do everything in the back)
I live in a neighborhood where people let their dogs shit in my front yard all the time. I fling that shit into the road with a shovel after I pulled my back last year picking someone else's dog shit. It really sucks stepping in it when you cut the grass.
He got rid of it. All gone, see?
What’s the problem of driving through it? It’s not like you have to wipe your tires off at the door.
If you have an attached garage which would seem more likely than not in an HOA controlled subdivision i wouldn't want dog shit covered tires in my house.
Do you really believe that the dog shit would still be on the tires after a normal day’s commute or running errands?
No but it will be thrown from the tires onto the body of the car and who wants that shit on their car when they park in the garage?
Not likely.
If they have to drive over it to enter or exit the subdivision like they just said in the post where do you expect it to go??? Do you just enjoy shit particles in your garage? Im not kinkshaming this just isnt the sub for you its a little off topic.
It’s amazing that this needs to be explained. There is dust/dirt on every road (except after a fresh rain) which acts like kitty litter and dries it out, along with the sun. It effectively turns to dust including with the road heat.
If it’s wet/rainy out, the relatively high-pressure water being squeezed through the rain channels rinses the tires.
This is not the big deal that anyone is making it out to be.
Its amazing you think that actual shit doesnt take days or weeks to dry out that much, do you not own a dog? You have less than no idea what youre talking about or youre genuinely just perfectly fine with shit all over your belongings.
I’ve had a dog in my life for most of the time I’ve been on this planet. If for some rare reason there was an unexpected long delay getting home in the evening to let the dog out and there was an accident inside, it was already a relatively solid mass that could be easily picked up with a paper towel, not a gushy, greasy mess.
I’d venture to guess that what the old man was flinging was already in this state too. Again, overreaction.
The smell being outside OPs house perhaps? Its just gross
Does the OP do nothing but corner-store runs 2 blocks away?
Shut up & quit flinging shit into the street
Tell it to the neighbor, if it’s that concerning.
On top of being disgusting, this is dangerous for people on motorcycles or bikes. The road is not a waste disposal bin.
There's all sorts of nearly-hidden obstacles which are dangerous for motorcyclists (yes, I've ridden), and dog shit would probably rank lower than a child inadvertently running out in front of you.
Bicyclists riding on the street are borderline suicidal anyway.
You sure picked a weird hill to die on.
Alot of other people did too by attempting to force some sort of agreement out of submission to what doesn’t have a right or wrong answer.
George Orwell would be proud.
Throwing dog crap into the street is the wrong answer.
It’s an opinion. Which you are allowed.
K, boomer.
Child of boomers.
Stop learning from them. You sound like an ass.
No need for names. We’re all entitled to our opinions.
And entitled to consequences for stupid opinions.
It’s all in the eye of the beholder. One person’s “stupid opinion” is another person’s “there’s bigger fish to fry than dog shit on the street”.
Which, again, is an incredibly boomer-esque take for the “Boomers Being Fools” sub.
It’s fucking disgusting,… in our neighborhood people walk and children play, no way they should have to deal with some inconsiderate asshole’s dog shit.
There’s alot that needs to be dealt with in neighborhoods, and none are perfect…dog shit would probably rank 20th in the typical neighborhood of problems that need solving.
People complaining about a couple bits of dog shit in the street is one of the boomer-est complaints imaginable…The irony of being in the “Boomers Being Fools” sub.
You’re posting too much on this thread,…You are now rationalizing that assholes who toss dog shit in the middle of the road are alright with you. Good luck with that.
“You’re posting too much on this thread”
Is that really a thing?
“You are now rationalizing that assholes who toss dog shit in the middle of the road are alright with you.”
Wrong. I’m pointing out that it’s an ironically-boomerish complaint in which any alleged consequences are being blown massively out of proportion to the point of implausibility.
You really want to be wiping bits of motorbike rider off the road cos they've lost control after hitting a slippery pile of excrement?
It sounds like the boomer isn’t putting it into piles large enough to have any consequence. We’re not talking about the days when manure carts toiled up and down dirt paths here.
You realise prevailing weather conditions are also a factor, right?
A motorbikist could easily come off on a wet oily road if they are swerving to dodge an unwarranted pile of dog eggs, even if they don't actually make any contact with said dog eggs....
If a motorcyclist is swerving on a wet oily road to avoid a couple scattered pieces of dog crap (which probably already caused it to at least rinse into the curb), and IF they’re even still visible at that point, then they’re doing it wrong.
Point is, they shouldn't HAVE to swerve to avoid dog shit on the road, cos the boomer SHOULDN'T be flinging it there to begin with.
If you have to swerve on a motorcycle to avoid a few scattered pieces of dog shit, then you’re going too fast. If by some goofball chance you actually wipe out due to dog shit on a curve (which would not happen on a straight), then you were really going too fast and at that point, be a far-greater danger (and nuisance) to the rest of the neighborhood than a couple scattered pieces of dog shit on the street.
There’s about 6-8 piles currently, drove around it today. He’s been doing it for at least a year.
Jeez, that’s pretty shitty.