Dad is blocked from our lives because he violated boundaries by wearing a Trump hat and saying racist shit to me outside my kid's school.
Mom was not aware of what he was going to do supposedly. She's allowed to see kiddo if he's not there.
Today she asked if she could come over and drop off presents for my daughter and talk to my sister and I about family therapy.
15 minutes after she is there, she said the following:
My sister and I are antisemites.
Trump brought peace to Israel, as well as to other places all over the world.
Venezuela is thrilled with what Trump is doing.
I, her son, am an awful person.
Merry fucking Christmas, I guess 🤷
I don't understand why some Trump voters have to ruin their families over this. It's that important to them to make it their entire personality that they can't just keep it to themselves when the situation warrants keeping it to themselves.
This! Sometimes silence is golden... you'd think they'd heard that expression at some point.
Exactly! I work with some Trump voters and I never ever bring up politics because I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable or to even get into that topic when I'm supposed to be working. The Trump supporters do not hesitate to be loud and proud about it though. Even if no one else is taking their bait they'll loudly talk about it with each other. It's so obnoxious.
There was a fist fight in my office back in 2016 that turned into an all out brawl that had to be broken up. Since then, they’ve had an extremely strict “politics do not exist in this office” rule. People were freaked out enough by the fight that it’s explained to newbies as background for why people make an effort to never disclose their politics. One of the fist fighters still works there. The other went to another firm years later, but it wasn’t on bad terms.
I work at a personal injury law firm. A big one. Oh, and no one was drinking when this happened.
One of the reasons I stay is for the “zero politics” rule. Of course, like any place, like-minded folks find one another and talk. But the idea of it not being a public thing is awesome. Bonus we can openly tell people who ask if we are required to disclose their immigration status “fuck no, we don’t report to ICE or the IRS or the FBI or the local PD for that matter,” and it doesn’t spark an office wide debate on the ethics of that and if we should be doing that.
I worked at a non-profit for adults with brain injuries. They had to institute a no politics rule in the office long before I ever worked there. People with brain injuries tend to have a hard time with emotional regulation and decision making. The amount of fighting that can happen in that office was insane. Lots of members would end up on suspensions from hanging out in there or coming to groups because there would be fist fights or screaming fights or whatever. Removing politics (and religion) from the equation helps.
Holy shit that's crazy. There was a lot of bickering in my office in 2016 but I don't think brawling crossed anyone's mind lol. It would be really great if we had a no politics rule, though. You'd think that would just be a given to help keep the peace. Who wants that kind of animosity in the office?
I bet they think they can force OP and other estranged family members to agree with them, and allow them back to spew their disgusting views to the children, and run things like they could when you were a little kid. Don't be surprised at the number of people that take their sides.
Talking like that in front of kids is pretty sick.
That is definitely what they think.
It's because maga is a religious movement, not a political one. And just like all religions, they have to force their beliefs and God down everyone else's throats, by force if necessary, to "save them"
That's a good analogy. It's gross.
Except it not an analogy. If you look at MAGA, it meets all the hallmarks of a religious cult. They are literally in a cult.
In point of fact, religion and politics are deeply intertwined in MAGA, to the point that they’re indistinguishable. The most rabid strains of evangelical “prosperity gospel” Christian sects have no border between the two…it has merged into a single cult where if you are all in on one, you’re all in on the other, and Jesus and Trump are elevated to God status in equal measure (if not in words, then clearly in behavior).
Very similar to how trump asserted himself into others, these people are doing the same to everyone else.
Evangelical Christianity taught them well
Boomers should be seen and not heard. They told us as kids to be quiet ALL THE TIME! Turn about is fair play.
At least the ones like this!
Really. As far as I’ve seen, most of those at the No Kings protests are boomers. The term is overused in a derogatory manner that basically invalidates the age group.
There’s just as many boneheads younger than 60 being obnoxious, including in public.
I said the ones like this, meaning Trump voters. I guess you failed to read that part? Also I don't know what No Kings rallies you've been to, but the ones I've been to and the ones I've seen pictures of in the media had a good representation of all ages
Being able to hate minorities is more important to them than family
That's so sad, but true.
My family was maga long before trump took over. I wrote off most of them when I turned 18 and left for college
Most of my family is either pretty much to the left or center left, but a lot of my husband's family is pretty right wing. I can proudly say that not one of them will outwardly admit to being pro-Trump at this point. They've all denounced him. Not that they voted for Harris or anything, but supposedly they just didn't vote for president at all.
Psst… they voted for Trump. They’re just now embarrassed to say so, but they sure as shit did.
I accepted the fact that most of my relatives were shitty human beings thirty years ago. I haven't missed any of them for a minute. Before that, I always just assumed that I had to accept it as just the way it is. Lesson learned. If someone isn't a positive influence on my life, then they don't belong in my life.
I like the cut of your jib!
It functions like a cult in a lot of ways. Cults very often result in separation from non-believing family members.
It really is like a cult. The whole Epstein issue has them reeling because they see us saying that if Bill Clinton or any other Democrat is in there they should go to prison. They can't even comprehend that type of thinking because they are just so used to blindly following their leader no matter what he does.
[ Removed by Reddit ]
And the sad thing is, they don't think that they're the ones ruining their family...obviously, it's those goddamn socialist, Communist, antisemite, woke liberals in their family!
Exactly right. Those damn elitist Democrats making everyone evil!
Because when cruelty is the point cruelty towards anybody not wanting to be cruel is compulsory.
Be cause they're unempathic, selfish pigs. It's literally that simple.
The answer to nearly every MAGA/Trump "I don't understand..." post is: It's a cult.
My mom is that way
Time is flat circle.
"Brother against brother" is a phrase used in histories of the American Civil War, describing the predicament faced in families (primarily, but not exclusively, residents of border states) in which their loyalties and military service were divided between the Union and the Confederacy. There are a number of stories of brothers fighting in the same battles on opposite sides, or even of brothers killing brothers over the issues.
I think about this often in relation to the current political atmosphere.
And those same Trump voters will then go on social media to complain that their families don't want to see them anymore because of politics.
Cultists gonna cult, man.
Kind of like this - Join The Trump Cult and watch dear lifelong friends become your newfound enemies once they disagree with your position.
Why? Because, in gambling terms, they have placed an “all in” bet on being on the right side of history and they see that wager going the wrong way. It is an attempt to “beat the house” by persuading others to join the cult.
Ruined everything else, why not go for the full set?
It’s a cult. Trump is their god.
But they blame us for “letting politics destroy our family”. Nope. Not politics. Morals. WTF does she think family therapy is going to do for this?
Sounds like they can both enjoy being blocked together.
The family that's blocked together, can pray together! (For you obviously, since they clearly did nothing wrong)
Right before I went no contact with my dad he called my mom and told her what an asshole and disappointment I am. His wife also emailed me and my wife telling us how terrible I am and that my dad deserves better than me. Then in the next sentence demanded we come visit them with my newborn son. Yeah. Sure. The delusion these boomers have is incredible. Sorry your dad is a dick
Your dad is a whiner. At least you know that you don’t have waste time and money going to see him.
You will be much happier
Sounds like both dad and mom are dicks.
Well it’s his wife. 4th wife at that although he tried to get me to call her mom when they married when I was 17. Haha
He sounds like a real catch /s
*his current wife
Or future ex-wife
She’s lasted longer than the others. Haha she’s number 4 and just as much of a self entitled narcissist like he is.
She made her choice, and she will now reap the consequences. It's never easy to watch a loved one choose a dark path.
It's pretty much the same with all of the people shocked about the coming ACA increase. I voted for you to have food, healthcare, education...you voted to be racist or didn't vote at all. Sucks to be you.
I'm sorry for your loss, truly.
The CR (Continuing Resolution) expires the end of January.
We shall see how loud the Trumpites who can not afford ACA without subsidies will be speaking out to their republican representatives about restoring the subsidies in order to pass another CR.
They will simply blame Obama.
But it's clearly all Biden's fault!1!111!!!
OBiden
JoeBama
Nah, Teump has already said its Obamas fault.
Of course! It's called Obamacare for a reason!
Teump literally did recently.
I have already heard plenty do that.
Thanks Obama
Make Argentina Great Again!!
I have been stocking up on popcorn for this. Hard to hold off with the absoulte volune of finding out, but it will be a hell of a Janurary.
That won’t happen. They’re creating a crisis to “solve”. Their messaging sounds like they’re setting the stage to implement the Concept of a Plan for Healthcare from Project 2025.
Trump mentioned most of it in his debate response. The plan is to eliminate ACA requirements for non-subsidized plans so private, for-profit, health insurers can “afford” to
increase profitstrickle the savings from covering less medical expenses down to consumers by lowering the cost of premiums.It’s not just ACA Marketplace plans. Premiums for employer-based plans are increasing by the steepest rise in more than a decade.
I almost ignored open enrollment to let it auto-renew my current plan, but I’m glad I didn’t. The premium for my current employer-based plan will be 18% higher in 2026 and the deductible will be 50% higher. That plan doesn’t cover anything before the deductible is met. Premium+deductible for a family of 3 will be $12,433.
Not having insurance is a better option than paying that much before insurance covers any medical expenses, but I switched to the lowest tier plan even though there was limited info about the coverage.
Yeah, no more contact and no more access to the kid. She's clearly just as bad as him.
Absolutely time for new traditions for you and your family.
I haven’t talked to my cult member mom in about 5 years. Or anyone in my family for that matter. My mom decided that Jesus will protect her from Covid so she’s not getting a shot even though my wife (who she says she loves) is immunocompromised. I told her if she doesn’t get a Covid shot, the next time she sees me, I’ll be standing over her casket. I’m the only one in my family that had the balls to stand up to her and her narcissistic bs. Sometimes the best families are the ones YOU get to choose to have. I have my wife and a few great friends and that’s all I need.
I’ll bet your dad filled out her absentee voting form too.
Well now you don’t have to worry about their end of life process. That’s a win for sure! No dealing with nursing homes, hospitals, insurance nightmares, etc. That’s a gift in itself to me.
This is how I see it. They're each on their own.
Cut that cancerous shit out and go live a happy life. Your family and children don’t need that shit.
It will never cease to amaze me, how many people have decided to torpedo and tear apart their own families for some bumbling orange conman with dementia.
Bye, Mom.
Therapy won’t fix them, they’re intent on being assholes.
Yea there is a huge difference between therapy to help oneself and de-programing therapy. They aren't very similar. And lord help us if deprograming became anything near "normal". We'd just be China or north Korea at that point
It’s very unlikely the family therapy was for them since they don’t see themselves as the problem.
I’m sorry they’re like this. Time to go NC, for your own peace.
Nip this in the bud. They don’t get to act, talk and behave like this without consequences. Parents can talk shit about me, my spouse and my siblings all they want. The moment they pull this, in front of my children-absolutely not! My grandmother was horribly racist. The fact that my parents thought that was normal and never corrected her, now disgusts me.
My grandfather was as well. I told him Idw my kids to hear racial slurs and he fully respected that boundary.
FOX (then others) learned hate and outrage keeps people engaged and sells. Now that their base is riled up and they are in power, they don’t know what to do with their outrage.
They are also mad it’s not all sunshine and rainbows like promised, so it MUST be other people’s fault. It couldn’t possibly be they were sold empty promises because that would mean they were wrong.
They are engaged to be enraged for outrage
Your mistake is believing MAGA Mom is rational. She’s had her brain 🧠pickled and filled lies and propaganda. Expect nothing from her and she will never disappoint you.
I really admire millennials and gen z being able to stay strong in cutting people like that right on out of their lives. I am an older gen x and though I have managed to do this, I am still consumed with guilt, as dysfunctional as I know that is. I have all those voices telling me to honor mother and father and blood is thicker than water..blah blah blah. I honestly have a twinge of jealousy but true happiness for the younger generations knowing their boundaries well. My own children are that way because my husband and I chose to break some of those generational traumas and not continue them with our own children. Go forward in the world my brave,confident youngsters..keep making the world a better place you magical sprites!!
Understand they are standing up for a child rapist and convicted felon.
I am so sorry. I’m 46 and my mother’s infatuation with Trump has been the death knell to our relationship as well.
It’s not your fault, and good on you for choosing your and your family’s mental health and security.
Oof. Good riddance
Gaza is a difficult subject for the Either/Or and Black/White thinkers. Their brains meltdown with nuance. I assume this is why she calls you antisemitic?
It's possible to support Israel's right to exist and be secure, and support its right to target Hamas, without also supporting the choices to bomb hospitals and civilian areas. Not all Jews and Israelis support Netanyahu's actions. Evangelicals with end-time views, for example, don't understand that the Israelis are as divided in their political views as Americans are in ours.
Evangelicals with end-time views don’t care a whit about anything that happens in Gaza (or anywhere else) except how it affects their Revelations expectations.
Evangelicals are proof that, somehow, one can be pro-zionist and antisemitic at the same time.
They don’t care about Jews either. When Jesus comes back the Jews will be dead (according to their beliefs, I’m an atheist). That’s the only reason why they’re pro Israel, but I really don’t get it because why do they want to be raptured up to heaven so badly? Yeah, the earth isn’t great sometimes but how do they know that they’ll be raptured?
I think it's sad funny that any magat thinks they're being raptured. From my [Christian] perspective, that just does not capisce
Because they accepted Jesus Christ as their personal Lord and Savior, of course. /s
Evangelicals only care about the Temple being rebuilt so Jesus can return.
Well said. These are problems which have existed for centuries and are so complex that one cannot boil the situation down to a few phrases. If the USA is going to be a factor in helping negotiate a long term peace process, we need to have people in the administration who actually understand that, and who understand the situation over there, to the extent that any Westerner actually could understand it.
Unfortunately, Trump has staffed the State Department and intelligence services with people whose only qualification was undying loyalty to him. Whether any of these nincompoops knows anything is a far less important matter.
This agreement right here! Both things can be right!
r/raisedbyborderlines
So are you going NC with her as well?
Am I the only one who would have been so frustrated at being treated that way that I read the last line of your post as "Merry christing Fuckmas"?
My son and daughter went no contact with my mother and brother (who is the same age as my daughter (34) and still lives at home🙄) about 5 years ago and I went low contact . It was honestly the best thing they could have done because after about 2-3 years of NC my mom begged for them to come back and we haven’t had any problems after 2 years because she knows that they will be gone again if the problem reoccurs. I know this doesn’t always work out this way but NC is the way to go if people can’t control themselves.
Sounds like she needs to move to the "and find out" phase of FAFO. Sure she didn't know what your father was doing🙄. Sorry
I am so sorry you lost your parents to Trump.
The last 10years divided so many families
TV is their internet and they will believe everything it tells them.
It’s a cult! People ruin their lives to protect the “savior!” It’s sad really.
I’m so sorry. I feel so awful at the holidays for all who have toxic parents. I’m fortunate that the Boomers in my life range from wonderful to harmlessly out of touch. May you all find love and grace with chosen family.
That fucking sucks. Im so sorry.
Hope she likes no contact
It takes more effort to cause problems than to just shut their mouths. It makes zero sense.
I was called the “spawn of Satan” because I told my mother that what the cops did to George Floyd in Minneapolis (where I live) was wrong and horrific. I then told her people had a right to be angry about it. I also said that I stood with the BLM movement. I guess Satan has a place in hell for those that want to treat others fairly and equally? Then I guess I am the spawn of Satan. 🙄
Yeah I mean technically that makes your parents Satan
1st, im sorry OP. I cant imagine how that feels. And how it feels to cut off parents. I am really truly sorry. I hope you can heal from this. 2nd, the trash seems to be taking itself out. Which is nice! Im just sorry its fam. Hope youre okay.
I can't wait until I can go NC with my family. We were watching (I use the term lightly as I don't watch TV) some show and I missed the context but my stepdad just starts shouting about how Biden is cutting off children's genitals. Like I've heard a lot of stupid things from these people, but that's on a whole different level.
It’s so odd to me that these people think they can get away with this and nobody will call them on it. We had our own little brouhaha this week when our houseguest mentioned her boyfriend, who is Bengali, and my parents decided it was hysterical to joke about calling ICE on him. The four young people in the room (me included) legitimately turned our back on them and continued a conversation with just us four. Meanwhile they were laughing so hard they were in tears, clapping each other on the back. What the fuck is wrong with you people?! You just said that to his GIRLFRIEND. Ha ha fuckity ha.
After that it went really downhill fast. We’ve decided to suspend further visits for the time being. Fuck around and find out 🤷🏻‍♀️
Squeeze them for money
What money? They donate it all to their new lord and savior.
People who donate money to billionares deserve to get scammed.
I tend to agree, there!
Ie, they’re donating it to a religious con man.
This made me chuckle.
My MIL loves Trump and cannot stop talking about how wonderful he is. She knows how I feel, especially since I started pulling out my phone and dropping out of the conversation when she starts. Last time we were supposed to go out to lunch I declined saying I know you guys want to talk about Trump so I'll just stay home so that you don't feel pressured. Then she's like; "Oh no! I promise I won't talk politics." But she can't help it.
Sorry for the loss of your parents.
Guess who's getting blocked as well!!!
Same!!!! Mine hung a picture of trump to 'annoy you and your sister ' cool. Enjoy dying alone.
I'm not sure it'll help.. but you aren't alone- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h40g5LdA-TQ
Give her a nice big block for Xmas! She gave you enough horseshit for the foreseeable future.Â
Ugh. I’m so sorry.
Political people are fucking weirdos.
The most ridiculous thing is they are the generation who told us don’t talk politics and yet MAGA is their personality
If you are anywhere in Colorado by some chance, I am open to being an adjunct mom/grandmom. ❤️
I cut my dad out in 2016 for being hard MAGA. I can’t even imagine how rotten he is now
Life is just far, far better without such parents in your lives. More peaceful for sure.
You don't "owe" them anything. Respect and the rights to your time are earned. And lost.
Well at least you don’t have to worry about Christmas next year.
Tell him his beloved martyr Charlie was trans and so is his widow and go no contact.
This is the type of person that wont understamd why their children dont want them in their lifes even 15 years from now.
I feel this. My brother can’t keep his mouth shut and has ruined our relationship. He’s so lost in the MAGA bull crap I don’t know if I’ll ever get him back.
Im watching a fantastic documentary atm called Trump V Truth. 100 times that the Cheeto has not done his research or outright lied. You should get them to watch it 🤣
Their loss!
Ugh they suck
She should read Oeggy Noonan’s piece about not giving up family for politics. Oh yeah. That was meant for liberals.
đź«‚
Thank you for standing up to hatred. Signed, a boomer who hasn’t fallen into the Felon 47 cult
I’m wondering how old your folks are. Because my folks got more racist as they got older, even though dad was a democrat and union man for most of his life. They became the minority in the town they lived in for decades. The very small town is now home to very poor families, and most are not white. But the mayor and council are white Republicans. I think they suffered from confusion,fear,and isolation. They never had any friends who were not white. So that part of their lives is very common here. Lives of white and black folks here are very separate, in neighborhood,churches,jobs…every where. We are not in the south,either. Perhaps your expectations of your folks is unrealistic. I only had to quietly ask my folks to stop using racist language because people I love are black. And they did. But they didn’t stop thinking it, that’s for sure.
Wait…Your mom said “My sister and I are antisemites.”
What does your mom’s sister have to do with this?
Context clues, buddy, she said OP and his sister are antisemitic.
That’s not what the OP said.
The OP said that the mother said the following:
“My sister and I are antisemites.”
Did the OP mean to say that the mother said the following:
“You and your sister are antisemites.” ?
Again, context clues. He's not giving direct "" quotes, he's saying what she said from his POV in a simplified list.
When the OP said that “she said the following”, that implies a direct quote, which is the opposite way of keeping it simplified.
If the OP wanted to actually keep it simplified, he could have instead said something to the effect of “She said that my sister and I were antisemites.” But instead, “She said the following…”
This is a weird hill to die on.
“Say what you mean, mean what you say” is a reasonable hill.
Everyone understood what op meant. Pedantry.
Jesus Christ dude you seem to be the only one who didn’t get it. Sorry his editor didn’t catch the grammar snafu before he posted.
I get that it could have gone both ways, and clarification was asked.
Instead, I got an apology from someone that wasn’t the OP.
Maybe the mom actually did say “my sister and I are antisemites”, in which case, the thrust of the story takes a different direction.
On the other hand, it could be that it’s not the mom…or the mom’s sister, who are the antisemites.
Just trying to come to the bottom of who is in this story. Is that too much to ask?
Your reading comprehension seems to be getting in the way here. I already explained that OP said it was in reference to himself and his sister. Even if you are trying to be pedantic, you aren't correct.
And you aren’t the OP. As it stands, it could still go one of both ways until the OP clarifies.
Who are the antisemites in this story?
No, it can't go both ways. Everyone else reading this understands exactly what OP is saying. Is English not your first language?
You added the quotation marks to make it say that.
OP didn't use quotation marks.
I was quoting the exact wording from the OP. Therefore, quotes were added.