I’ve been with both men and women. Sex with someone is way different and is more enjoyable especially when the connection and attraction is there.

I do penetrate myself sometimes, and I’ve gotten to the point where it can be enjoyable, but it’s never as enjoyable as when my wife does it to me. It doesn’t even compare.

I gotta be really in the mood to enjoy it when it’s just me. When you’re turned on, your gspot will engorge and penetrating it will feel good. If it’s not engorged, it doesn’t feel like much, just as you described it.

I also think it’s the angling of it all. Doing it yourself might not be hitting it right

I've never found dildos to feel good and I've tried several, even the fancy hyper-realistic ones. They feel vaguely annoying/slightly unpleasant at best. Sex with an actual person with a penis feels far better.

Same. When I first had penetrative sex I just felt like I had been lied to that it was going to be amazing. All the stories I’d read, what my friends told me, movies… it’s only good when it’s with someone you really care about, with all the other fun parts of intimacy, and even then it’s not enough to get most women off (what’s the % of women that climax from penetration, like 30%?) And in fact the only time for me that it’s REALLY good is when I’m having an orgasm from clitoral stimulation at the same time. 

Otherwise, 99.9% of my solo time is with external toys. Internal ones are just … there, and tbh kinda distracting. 

I understand that far from all women enjoy solo penetration. It's something that's enjoyable when it's being done by someone to you .

I’ve never personally gotten off on a dildo alone, but the feeling of it being inside definitely makes me feel good in I like being full. Sometimes when I’m using a wand I need to put a dildo in to help me get off, but I’m not always pumping myself with it. Just need it to fill me. That could be just from the fact I’m naturally wet enough to slide it inside with little to no discomfort and without much prep, and I like to abuse that to see what all I can withstand.

Bodies are weird and never work the same person to person. It’s totally okay if you don’t think it works for you. It’s important that you’re getting what you want out of the experience and if not, don’t feel pressured to try again because you think you have too.

My best friend and I chat about this all the time where dildos don’t really work for her and she struggles to get anything out of it at all, but she still has very satisfying sex with her boyfriend.

Don’t freak out, trust your body, and be kind to yourself <3

Omg did I post this.

I hate being penetrated with anything other than the real thing.

Try both at the same time

The biggest thing imo is how aroused you are. If you aren’t super aroused and excited to use a toy you’re not going to magically love it being inside of you.

Honestly, I rarely masturbate because I have a difficult time getting aroused enough without the additional excitement of a partner. When I do masturbate I also prefer clitoral stimulation and don’t enjoy any toy penetration for the reasons you describe. But during partnered sex I very much enjoy penetration whether from a partner or from toys.

I remember thinking something was wrong with me because I hated the once famous “rabbit” vibrator the first time I tried using a toy for penetration. But in reality I just have a more reactive sexual desire than some other people. There’s nothing for you to worry about.

Plus, most women don’t get off with penetration alone. So naturally you’re probably not going to orgasm with a dildo if you’re not also stimulating your clit.