What is something 'sexy' in movies that is actually a total disaster/uncomfortable in real life with your partner?
  • 468 points Beneficial_Garage_97

    Showering together. It's fucking cold and there's not enough water stream or space for us both.

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    128 points Will2Survive

    The water will also wash away the natural lubricants, more than once shower sex has lead to chaffing

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    115 points GTRari

    Peasant. This isn't a problem if you finish in 12 seconds like me.

    Edit: I am a man this is not a brag.

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    16 points GarageRaccoonEnergy

    Peasant speed !

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    5 points my-anonymity

    lol, whenever we do it in the shower, it’s usually a quickie.

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    12 points Only-Writing-4005

    this is true i like to start in the shower and finish in bed to avoid the raw feeling

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    81 points Maximum2945

    i love showering and bathing in general w my partner. not like sexually just like, hanging out

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    56 points syrioforrealsies

    Years ago, sometimes my then boyfriend, now husband would shower and I'd sit outside the shower but inside the bathroom and enjoy the steam and let my skincare sit in while we chatted. I don't know why we got out of the habit. Maybe we should bring it back

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    5 points daltonsbondgirl

    thats really sweet, i think y'all should.

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    1 points [deleted]

    [removed]

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    14 points Beneficial_Garage_97

    Maybe our shower is too small and our house is too cold.

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    16 points GTRari

    I'm indifferent on shower sex but I also am a fan of showering with your partner. We've done it enough that we have a good lather/rinse rotation going on now even with a traditional tub + shower head combo.

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    5 points Beneficial_Garage_97

    Im not even talking about sex lol. Just is awkward in our shower i guess.

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    2 points GTRari

    I mean maybe see if deliberately rotating enough in a hot/steamy shower is more fun. And if not, at least you know for sure! My girlfriend and I both run pretty hot to begin with so maybe we can just get away with it.

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    6 points Independent-Monk5064

    Same. Sensual not sexual

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    6 points awkwardslutt

    Right? We like to get each other’s backs

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    1 points Mythoclast

    Same here. We don't do it a ton but we are very good at "the shower dance". Swapping places so more or less water is on either one of us.

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    1 points my-anonymity

    We do this on vacations a lot since the showers are usually huge and have a sprayer and functioning shower head so neither of us are cold. I also love washing each others backs.

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    12 points linerva

    As a Brit (most properties have a combined bath shower) with a man 1 foot taller than her, I can't imagine anything more hazardous and less pleasant than shower sex especially. I cannot imagine it not being a logistical nightmare and uncomfortable. I like my sex comfy and somewhere we can take our time.

    But even just showering together would be inconvenient and liable to cause accidents.

    Plus I like to shower at length with scalding hell water, whereas he likes a quick and thorough scrub, so I'm pretty sure my husband would feel like he was being tortured if I took him to the shower with me for a whole shower.

    Plus we already spend a lot of time together, shower time is a nice bit of alone time. And everyone deserves that.

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    3 points Beneficial_Garage_97

    We are 15 inches apart lol. Sex in the shower isnt really even an option for us, I'm just talking about showering and scrubbing eachother. I like running our hands over eachother and the slippery soap is sexy and all but its hard to actually get a wash and it's hard to keep us both warm.

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    9 points Turbulent_Glove_501

    Plus it’s treacherous! I don’t want to fall on my face and ruin a perfectly lovely time by having to go to the ER for stitches.

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    7 points WrestlingWoman

    My husband prefers lukewarm showers while I want it hot enough to look like a boiled lobster. It's no fun for either of us to shower together because of that.

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    2 points Beneficial_Garage_97

    I could only do a lukewarm shower after a run on a hot summer day.

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    3 points Toasted_Lizard

    There is a way, with the right shower and the right “skin care” products. But agreed when the shower is set up wrong is just cold and poorly lit.

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    3 points JanetSnakehole610

    My husband got this thing that hooks up to the shower head to convert it so there’s the original shower head and then one on the opposite side. No one gets cold now!

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    1 points my-anonymity

    I want one of those!

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    2 points AKV9

    It works as a warm-up for the main event though

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    2 points Smooth_Bandito

    We all came here to say the shower.

    Whether it’s sex or just bathing. Showering with a partner is the fucking worst.

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    1 points Only-Writing-4005

    i had my shower remodeled for this very reason

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    1 points KateThePlaymate

    This!!!!!

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    1 points StingoX

    Well with good set up this could be solved. But other aspects will never disappear.

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    1 points [deleted]

    [removed]

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    1 points AutoModerator

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  • 241 points laikocta

    Shower sex, whirlpool sex or, most terrible, ocean sex. Ouch.

    Also, keeping your bra on during sex.

    Also-also - maybe I'm outing myself as old and vanilla, but sex that involves kneeling or lying anywhere else than on a quite soft comfy surface.

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    31 points mishufly

    I'm feeling so normal knowing.

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    16 points ComplexAddition

    Whirlpool sex...?

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    16 points linerva

    I assume hot tub.

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    15 points ComplexAddition

    Oh ok... I really imagined people having sex in a whirlpool and that it was a thing. And you know what? I don't doubt anything in this world anymore

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    3 points MysteriousMysterium

    Laikocta could be German. In Germany, a jaccuzi is usually called whirlpool, yes the English word, even if whirpool means something entirely different in English.

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    2 points laikocta

    Spot on, and thank you - TIL!

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    4 points MysteriousMysterium

    Liebe Grüße!

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    3 points ToughVeterinarian862

    Maybe on a washing machine?

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    1 points ComplexAddition

    Lewd

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    8 points anonidfk

    I feel like the keeping your bra on during sex in movies is probably not done to be sexy, it’s probably just done so they don’t have to convince an actress to do a nude shot lol

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    1 points RulyDragon

    I bought a waterproof cushion for kneeling on when I give a shower BJ. Best $5 I ever spent, 10/10 would buy again. 

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  • 164 points lionmurderingacloud

    Sex on the beach. Terrible. Sand in all the bits. Making out, sure, but actual sex? Do not recommend.

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    62 points TurbulentCherry

    Any outdoor sex tbh. Nothing kills the mood faster than insect bites.

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    7 points mishufly

    Hahaha i can literally imagine that 🤣🤣🤣

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    10 points TurbulentCherry

    Never again. I regret it 14 years later still.

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    2 points mishufly

    Haha same 13 years for me

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    6 points jonni_velvet

    I had a good time lmao

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  • 124 points beelovedone

    Morning kisses pre-brush.....ew

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    76 points Unusual_Form3267

    This doesn't really bother me.

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    58 points Erza88

    Pecks are ok. Full make out? Hell no, lol.

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    14 points jerseyskies

    Omg it is gross but early mornings are always prime time for me and my partner which makes it worse. Weirdly though, my mouth being unbrushed bothers me more than his. If I wake up early, I brush my teeth and get back into bed so I don’t have to interrupt potential sexy time later in the morning.

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    3 points my-anonymity

    lol we take a quick pause to brush out teeth and just run back to bed so we can kiss.

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    6 points mishufly

    Ewww I've done this and it's horrible

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    1 points EmpressC

    Meh. We kiss in the middle of the night or in the morning without brushing first. I think it's more intimate being attracted to each other even when you're not fresh. After about 5 seconds you don't even notice.

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    -3 points prepuscular

    Mouthwash night before? Shouldn’t be that bad

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    27 points Thin-Razzmatazz7728

    Problem is, bacteria builds in your mouth overnight while sleeping. Even people with the best dental hygiene will probably have some version of “morning breath”

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  • 119 points Menyana

    Anal was effing awful in my opinion. 0 out of 5 stars. Never again. Mas I see it my anatomy is designed to accommodate a penis as is. There is no need to deviate from that.

    Its like some kinda ultimate goal for some guys... probably made popular due to the porn they watch.

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    58 points Plus_Word_9764

    Tbh if men want to fuck an asshole, it's naturally set up to be in men

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    27 points perthminxx

    Some women love it 🙋🏻‍♀️

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    25 points ytyhbllalk

    I like it better than PIV but the prep anal takes to make sure you don’t shit on your partner dulls some of the sparkle for me. No spontaneity. If it didn’t take so much planning and not eating I would opt for it every time.

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    8 points perthminxx

    Completely agree! That said, sometimes I will take the gamble and hope for the best

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    -2 points Frank_xCAPE_reality

    As à guy. And I think most men wouldn’t care if they get a bit dirty. It’s a Magical thing to be intimate like that with someone you love.

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    13 points ytyhbllalk

    Even if he doesn’t, I’m not comfortable with it lol. Same with period sex for me, my partner doesn’t mind it but I hate the mess of it.

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    2 points my-anonymity

    Use a disposable soft disc during your period! It’s the best thing ever.

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    1 points ytyhbllalk

    Dude every time I’ve tried I end up with it leaking! Maybe I’m doing it wrong but my paranoia that it will happen is too much for me to keep trying. And they’re expensive

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    3 points my-anonymity

    I’ve only had it leak once, so I only use it when the flow isn’t super heavy. It works great on a medium or light flow.

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    1 points ytyhbllalk

    I also get hella stressed taking it out lol. Always get blood EVERYWHERE. Maybe one day I’ll gain the courage.

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    2 points my-anonymity

    I just pull it out very slowly and then have some TP ready to wrap it up as soon as it’s out of me.

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    1 points mym3l0dy76

    im glad im not alone, ive never seen the appeal..why would i spend so much time on prep when i have a vulva that works fine and no prostate or anything inside my butt? plus it just doesnt arouse me at all lol

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  • 68 points ColouredGlitter

    Most things with food. Nothing sexier than quickly throwing your sheets full of chocolate sauce and whipped cream in the washing machine afterwards, or you have to buy new sheets.

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    2 points mishufly

    hahaha but it does the magic most of the time 😜

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  • 56 points Thin-Razzmatazz7728

    Having spontaneous or spur of the moment sex. For me personally, your hands and finger nails need to be clean; I’d also prefer if we’re both clean in general; haven’t just eaten food( I don’t want to taste the food you’ve just eaten); haven’t just used the bathroom to poop or pee; haven’t been sweating. The best sex for me takes some planning and pre thought.

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    19 points linerva

    I see what you mean. I like to be clean prior because then I can really relax when it comes to oral.

    Also on a related note: quickies. My horny brain might wish I need 5 seconds to warm up and tgat i can immediately go from 0 to 100 in seconds like my man (seriously have you seen how fast an erection can apoear out of nowhere?!), but alas I really do need more time.

    I find that prepping mentally a little in advance helps to get the blood flowing and helps me feel mentally ready.

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    1 points mishufly

    I'm 100% reflection of you

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    3 points mishufly

    I totally agree especially the hygiene part which many people don't care about and later regret.

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    2 points Jolly-Persimmon-7775

    People who don’t understand this haven’t experienced the nightmare that is recurring UTIs.

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  • 48 points EnvironmentalLuck515

    Trying to do it in a hot tub or a pool or a shower or the ocean or on the beach or in the backseat of a car.

    Most types of lingerie. Itchy, poorly fitting, lumpy...the opposite of feeling sexy.

    Anal.

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    2 points Competitive-Pop-390

    I loved pool sex in my much younger years. I guess it was being out in the open that did it for me.

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    1 points mishufly

    I'm for some reason terrified of doing out in the open.

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    1 points [deleted]

    [removed]

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    1 points AutoModerator

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    1 points [deleted]

    [removed]

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    1 points AutoModerator

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    1 points my-anonymity

    lol, I love car sex. It’s usually just a spur of the moment thing.

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  • 33 points thegirlwthemjolnir

    Lesbian standing up sex. It looks sexy as hell, but the angles are SO UNCOMFORTABLE.

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    18 points Menyana

    I curious about what were you doing? We've had some very successful standing up lezzy sexy times over here.

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    3 points thegirlwthemjolnir

    Really? 🤔 Fingering is difficult.

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    1 points Menyana

    Yeah, no issues here, but we don't have much height difference, and I have sturdy hands and strong wrists so maybe that helps?

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    5 points mishufly

    I didn't know that

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    1 points KryptonionNipple

    I've struggled with this too. Especially since all the partners I've had previously, men or women have been way taller than me!

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    1 points Menyana

    Ah yeah, I can see a significant height difference being a problem.

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  • 30 points sharklee88

    All the 50 shades crap. Whips, handcuffs and gags, etc.

    I'm guessing it's only a very small minority that actually enjoy that stuff. 

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    21 points Toasted_Lizard

    Respectfully disagree, but I take your point that a lot of people try this just because of the popularity of 50 shades even though it’s not really for them.

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    11 points EnvironmentalLuck515

    If it isn't fun it isn't being done correctly. There is definitely a right way and the right way takes time, commitment, trust, work and patience.

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    2 points Tunapizzacat

    Nah. Been there done that. Prefer things much more primal. I don’t want to sit back and watch cuffs hold someone down, I want to feel the struggle.

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    4 points mishufly

    I like being loved and not being beaten up 😂😂

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    -4 points mishufly

    But won't these things bring more spice in relationship?

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    17 points Toasted_Lizard

    I think this is the “default” kink people suggest when they want to spice things up but in reality it doesn’t work for most people. If you’re into it and know how to make it fun for all parties, it’s great. But tons of people read 50 shades, bought some ropes, and asked their poor unknowing husbands to emulate a poorly written and uninformed idea of a dom. Not so great.

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    16 points sharklee88

    I feel like there's a thousand sexual fantasies and kinks people can fulfil, without purposely causing pain and discomfort to each other. 

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  • 31 points Extension-Pick8310

    Threesomes. Way, way too much going on IRL.

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    -7 points mishufly

    wow you must be the star of an erotica 😊

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  • 27 points anihc3

    Beach sex. Sand everywhere, too exposed, bugs. Need I say more?

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    2 points mishufly

    Anything else from your experience?

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    8 points RoyceCoolidge

    Crabs.

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    1 points mishufly

    haha must have been morning one for sure 😁

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  • 19 points littlemissmoxie

    Sex when you/them are dirty or in a dirty environment.

    All I can think about are UTIs

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    1 points mishufly

    haha I wonder how they can even show such things in movies which influence people so much.

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    5 points littlemissmoxie

    There was a show I watched that had people fucking in a prison dungeon after being in fights/almost killed/covered in who knows what.

    I literally couldn’t think about anything other than UTIs lol

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    1 points mishufly

    Ewww that's gross 🤢

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  • 18 points GamingCatLady

    Showering together. Not enough room and cold.

    Not sexy at all haha

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    3 points mishufly

    Try out in a large shower room and if there is something to sit

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    2 points GamingCatLady

    Sadly we live in a little wartime bungalow. Should the opportunity come up I will totally try it!

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    1 points mishufly

    That's an interesting word.. opportunity 😜

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    1 points GamingCatLady

    Why?

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    0 points mishufly

    It shouldn't be an opportunity but something you look up to often especially when you are in a relationship. Just the way I think

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    2 points GamingCatLady

    Everyone is different.

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    1 points GamingCatLady

    Everyone is different. We don't like to travel or really go anywhere whats not home.

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    1 points mishufly

    That's true and I didn't mean to go, but maybe while you guys are on holiday or some trip.

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    7 points GamingCatLady

    Thats why I said if the opportunity came up.

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  • 13 points littlescreechyowl

    Food, sand, water. No.

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    1 points mishufly

    haha I agree with sand for sure 💯

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  • 9 points Yalllikebats

    idk i think oral is always seen as like some fancy body worship type thing but really its awkward and kinda gross

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    43 points Unusual_Form3267

    Respectfully disagree.

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    7 points Yalllikebats

    Haha yeah to each their own. I've heard people say they love it but I just cant understand haha.

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    2 points mishufly

    I totally agree with you 💯

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    6 points anonidfk

    I don’t love giving blow jobs, the actual activity isn’t fun lol, but I do find it hot to see my bfs reaction so that gets me going and also I like when he goes down on me so I’m willing to do the same lol

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    1 points Yalllikebats

    thats understandable. I dont mind giving head if he asks for it but I wont let him touch me. the idea of a face anywhere near my privates makes me wanna off myself

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  • 9 points soNOTaMILF

    Shower sex

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    3 points mishufly

    It's cool if you have a large shower room, isn't it?

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  • 9 points Either_Prize3351

    Hot tub sex! I wish it was as easy irl.

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    4 points StillMarie76

    People lose their corneas just getting hot tub water their contacts. And people want to slosh that inside their bits? 🤮

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    1 points mishufly

    haha I've never tried but I'm curious to experience what happens at that moment

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  • 7 points Garden_Jolly

    Sex on the beach looks romantic in movies but it’s a sandy, crusty nightmare in real life.

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    1 points mishufly

    yet more and more people want it 😁

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  • 8 points wwaxwork

    Beach sex. Sand is coarse and does get everywhere. No one likes sandpaper on their junk.

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    1 points mishufly

    haha I can relate to this one when he was behind me to complete his fantasy wishlist.

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  • 7 points Blacktransjanny

    Being a vampire

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    1 points mishufly

    That's RP

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  • 5 points Dr__Pheonx

    Going at it against a wall. Weird and extremely uncomfortable.

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    1 points mishufly

    hahaha weird and uncomfortable especially if your guy cannot lift you higher 😜

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    2 points Jolly-Persimmon-7775

    Even if they can lift high, the rhythm is never right. Doubt most women can get their o from a dozen slow whams with intermittent noggin slams.

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  • 7 points Whatthefrick1

    I remember an ex tried to pin me against the wall 😭 didn’t even kiss me, just walked away awkwardly

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    2 points mishufly

    hahaha maybe he wasn't ready in his head 🤣

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    3 points Whatthefrick1

    He suddenly realized that shit was dumb 😭

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    1 points mishufly

    Because he is a dumb.. I'm glad nothing happened and you got saved from a loser.

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  • 5 points PositiveAd823

    Sex on the stairs like in “9 1/2 Weeks.” Nope. Uncomfortable!

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    2 points mishufly

    haha agreed 😂

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  • 5 points KateThePlaymate

    Feeding each other food 🤣🤣

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    2 points mishufly

    Hahaha I did this for weeks after my engagement and realised he just wanted to be fed and seen as an important person in the room.

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  • 5 points blackdog08

    Cuddling face to face and going to bed. It’s a farce and you cannot breathe! Lol

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    1 points mishufly

    haha imagine he didn't brush before going to bed 😂😂

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  • 3 points curlyhairweirdo

    Shower sex.

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    1 points mishufly

    It's cool if you have a large shower room.. maybe try a luxury hotel next time and thank me later

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    2 points curlyhairweirdo

    Not all of us have luxury hotel money

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    1 points mishufly

    Yeah that's another thing 🤗

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  • 3 points YoureASpoon

    Shower/bath/spa and beach sex

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    1 points mishufly

    I agree with the beach but rest can be fun if spacious

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  • 2 points Quirky_Ad_1925

    Occasionally 69, I get the worst aches in my arms when I’m trying to give head, struggling to hold onto my boyfriends legs while I’m trying not to fall on to him, it’s sometimes a struggle 😂

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    1 points mishufly

    That definitely sounds like a lot of trouble 🤣🤣🤣

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  • 2 points dancinghobbit81

    Most "sexy talk" is just cringey in real life

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  • 2 points Cold_Blacksmith_7970

    Kissing in the rain. Being the shorter person just means that you get rain in your eyes no matter what you do. I've had a few guys try and it's a no from me.

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    1 points mishufly

    Haha I can relate to one such instance 😂😂 I thought I was being stupid.

    What was your alternative solution?

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    1 points Cold_Blacksmith_7970

    No alternative solution, I just told them that I will happily kiss them any time except in the rain 😂

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    1 points mishufly

    haha I bet they were decent guys 🤣

    My bf would have never agreed to that.

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    1 points Cold_Blacksmith_7970

    lol Yeah, they were good guys! I'm married to one of them now and there hasn't been any more kisses in the rain 🤣 But lots of other kisses still, obviously 🥰

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    2 points mishufly

    You trained him well babes 😜😜

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  • 2 points NoIncome7871

    Cleaning your teeth together (in front of the mirror). Always looks so social in movies. Far from it in real life - it's a fight for the sink.

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    1 points mishufly

    Again, I'm glad I'm not the only one thinking this.

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  • 1 points CityLightsTakeMeHome

    Dirty talk, role-play, going total dom, pool sex

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    1 points mishufly

    Do you guys not like it or some other reason?

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    1 points CityLightsTakeMeHome

    Well I dont have a partner right now per se however I used past experiences

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    -2 points mishufly

    Would love to know more... DM if you are interested

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  • 1 points Rockstar81

    Taking a bath together.

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    1 points mishufly

    This is soo cool if your shower allows enough space 😀

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  • 1 points MsNewKicks

    Sex in a car, a fitting room, a plane bathroom, etc.

    Have tried and it's cramped (and I'm pretty small).

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  • 1 points Shytemagnet

    Beach sex

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    1 points mishufly

    Sand going everywhere 😂😂😂

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  • 1 points EffinParalyzed

    Shower sex!

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    1 points mishufly

    What makes you say that?

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    1 points EffinParalyzed

    Hard to get in position, get cold too quickly, natural lubrication washes away

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    1 points mishufly

    Oh yes, similar experiences 😁

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  • 1 points independent_mind_7

    Shower, pool, or hot tube sex

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    1 points mishufly

    What are your reasons for that

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    1 points independent_mind_7

    The need for awkward positioning and the water rinses away our natural lubricants

    parent root
  • 1 points my-anonymity

    It’s not a lot of work at all. You just remove it but keep it level, and then pour into the toilet and wrap it up with a paper towel and dispose for the disposable ones. I mainly use it when I’m swimming or for sex.

    Yes! It’s great for sex on non-heavy days. Everything is just like you’re not on your period.

    They have reusable ones too. I only tried it once and didn’t like it. I think jt was just the kind I tried. Someone else in a different post said they use the reusable one and like it better than the disposable ones.

    parent
  • 1 points brmsz

    Sand and sex. this is not easy people.

    parent
  • 0 points Genyralkenobi

    scissoring

    parent
    1 points mishufly

    What would you do as an alternative?

    parent root
    1 points username_47239

    Oral, using fingers, using toys.

    parent root
    1 points mishufly

    Yeah that makes total sense

    parent root
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