i roll with it but —elbows on the table being rude. don’t know why it’s a thing… unless it just takes up too much space?
edit: 🤯 i was not expecting that sort of response. thank you everyone for sharing their thoughts and upvotes. 😅i feel like i have a better grasp on the subject matter…
Saw a video about this recently! Back when tables were a fancy new thing they were just a board on stands.
Elbows made it tip off!
Completely unnecessary now, just social inertia.
It's like having to leave a blazer button undone. That rule came from sycophants copying the style of a fat noble who couldn't do up his button.
Edit to add: the fact that suits are tailored to make them look better with that button undone is not a counterargument, it reinforces the fact that social trends persist with no purpose outside of being part of the in crowd.
Also if your at a dinner party and you have guests to either side of you, your elbows are probably gonna be in their space. Many times as a kind I accidentally elbowed my cousins during Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner lol, we have a big family and had to pack in a little bit when we were allowed at the adult table
The bottom button remaining undone started that way, but a big part of why it still sticks around is that it gives you a more flattering silhouette on a well tailored suit. Especially if you’re not fat, which is kinda ironic.
This drives me crazy. I am am embalmer and I dress people in suits and I always button that second button but there’s this other guy who works with us (he’s younger, thinks he knows everything) that always comes around and unbuttons it for “style” like the corpse is gonna need to sit down at some point? This isn’t the cover or GQ, this is someone’s grandpa, button your damn jackets!
Most adult/child behaviour methods would be grounds for assault charges if they were done in an adult/adult format. I think once as children we realise this, they tend to slow down and stop. When I realised this at school, canings stopped for me.
When I was a kid (born '86), my dad was big about no elbows on the table. Couldn't remember a specific reason, other than "it's bad manners."
Fast forward, I'm grown, have kids of my own. I don't care too much about elbows on the table, but my husband does, so it's a rule in our house, too.
Go to my parents' place for dinner, remind one of the kids to please get their elbow off the table. Well, my dad had NEVER heard such a thing, and wanted to know why. Like, I don't know dad, I learned it from you.
On ships, sailors had to keep the table from moving too much in rough waters, so they held the table in place with their elbows while eating.
Sailors were considered rude people ("curse like a sailor" etc), and only rude, unsophisticated people would behave in such a way. So eating like a sailor meant you also had no class.
These days, I haven't heard anyone complain about it, and I will eat that way if it is most comfortable. Seating my lefty BIL to the right of a right handed person, though... that causes problems.
Hahaha, I wish it was that easy. When my husband and I go out to eat with his family (his parents and brother), there are 2 lefties, 3 people with varying degrees of claustrophobia (one who must be on the end, and 2 who can't be fully cornered but can handle sitting to the inside of x person but not y or z person). Then 1 person also has significant hearing loss in at least 1 ear, and has to sit with her good ear towards the center of the table or she can't hear anyone.
It's always an experience when we first get to a table - shuffling around until most of these issues can be accomodated. And that's only 5 people lol.
It takes up space but it also can block the people on the side of you. If your elbows are on the table and you’re leaning inward such that the people on your side can’t see past you, that’s where it’s rude.
It’s similar to any social setting where you’re arranged somewhat in a circle and someone moves inward squeezing people out.
Edit: my point was that as the rule still has some sense to it isn’t about actually touching the table with your elbows but only when you’re taking up too much space or blocking people on the sides.
But what if it increases the odds of meeting up? I have definitely not always met up with vague acquaintances who I’ve exchanged “we should hangt out some time”s with, but definitely more often than vague acquaintances I haven’t had that exchange with.
For me it's this. I have limited time and by saying that, I'm signaling I do want to hang out, but it's probably going to take some effort.
I have a friend where she invited my family out but we couldn't make it that time, and then we invited her family out but they couldn't make it. The hope being sometime soon we actually will be able to.
Yes, if I tell someone that I want to see them soon, then I do. But I am busy, so it might not be in the next few weeks. We have to put forth the effort to make it happen.
A vague plan is not a plan, just well wishes. A specific plan date time location is someone actually being interested. And if you make plans with details and the other person can't .make it and doesn't offer an alternative then they don't want to actually hang out.
How do you know what's in the other person's head though? I've basically never had this exchange and known neither of us means it and I always am putting a little note in my brain to try and hang out with them when we both agree. It's possible I'm alone in this, or that you are, or something in between!
I got chastised in front of the whole class for yawning in 4th grade and I still think about how unfair that was. I was too focused on not yawning to even pay attention after that.
I remember when in first grade I was really sleepy and yawned (probably a bit loud) and proceeded to get slapped by the teacher, then I basically never yawned in a social place lol
We regularly have "engineers" (salespeople) come to my job and buy us lunch and "educate us about their technology" (pitch their product)
Last week we had a guy come in and talk at us for an hour when we'd only scheduled 10 minutes (he didn't even buy us lunch) and when I yawned during his spiel he called me out not once, but a second time as I was leaving when he said "I hope I didn't bore you too much"
Great way to sell a product, insult your potential customers.
I swear those “engineers” are why people hate actual engineers. Had an AT&T guy out to setup my internet and was bitching about engineers the whole time when I’d randomly need to be in the kitchen area of the living room. I was like yeah, fuck them. Let’s make that my password. It was hilarious because I’m an engineer (the nerd in the back kind) 😂 finally told him when he asked about the college memorabilia I had out and what degree I have. His face 😂🤣 but I can commiserate because of the type you described.
I yawn in the middle of conversations out of no where all the time. I am always actively involved in that conversation. I feel like it is like a PC ramping up fan speed to deal with cpu heat. I'm just cooling my brain off to continue thinking about the conversation.
it#s funny, for some reason my body got in the habit of yawning once I arrived at work and finished the whole dressing up, putting bag down etc routine. Coworkers always laugh that I'm still tired, but it's more like a moment of pause after the ~40 minutes morning routine and commute (on public transport)
Yawning is also a way bodies blow of excess CO2. Basically, if you stuff a ton of people in a small room, the CO2 concentration goes way up. If all your people start yawning during your meeting it's because they can't breathe and y'all need to open a GD window.
I get yawning spells sometimes where I start yawning and it just keeps going for a while every couple minutes -ish. I try to breathe more, etc, and nothing helps. It’s completely involuntary and has nothing to do with sleep or boredom or tiredness. I always feel so worried it will be perceived badly because of the social conditioning associated with yawning!
When I was in 4th grade I yawned during class and my bitch teacher called me out in front of the entire class and said I was rude and should feel bad for it. Fuck you Mrs. Rude (her literal name)
Almost everything related to formal clothes. The lowest button on a suit is always unbuttoned, but must always exist. The sleeve must have buttons, despite them being commonly fake. The existence of the tie.
And the silly French people who decided a utilitarian neckerchief should be turned into high fashion that would eventually devolve into a garrote for the common man!
Those fake buttons are only on cheap suits. Companies needed ways to make suits more affordable for people who cant spend >$1k on a suit, so they had to cut corners and one of the things they did is put fake buttons... another one is the lapel which has a slit in it that doesnt open... another would be how the lapel is folded...
Nonfunctional sleeve buttons make tailoring sleeve length a lot easier, which suit makers know, so even fancier suits may have fake buttons there now too.
The common story is that Napoleon had the sleeve buttons put on uniforms so that soldiers wouldn't wipe their noses on their sleeves. Has also been attributed to other military leaders
Just the fact that society can dictate what clothes in general are considered “nicer”. I’ve always found this ridiculous. So putting a collar and more buttons on a shirt somehow makes it “fancier”?
A good trick to beating this one is to say "Thank you" kindly, deliberately, intentionally when you receive a deserved apology.
I used to be so bad about apologizing back, but forcing myself to acknowledge their apology first has helped me to assess whether I actually have anything to apologize for in return.
I think this might be taking it too literally, the "it's okay" after an apology shows that you are accepting their apology, not that what they did doesn't warrant one.
I feel like thanking someone for apologizing doesn't actually show if you accepted it or not.
If someone opens a door, people go through it. It doesn’t matter that there’s 8 unlocked doors that go into the movie theater or mall or whatever, but a couple people start going through one single door and now that is THE ONLY door that people can go through until everyone in eyesight is gone and the cycle can start anew. I can’t stand the odd looks I get when I see a line forming to go into someplace andI just walk past and open a different door and “beat” 7 people inside because they decided to queue instead of just using half a calorie to open a door.
Every damn time I go in a business with a wide 2 door entrance one of them is locked. So irritating, why have entrance and exit doors (with signage describing them as such) yet only allow the use of one??!
For a reason they know and you don’t. Like a broken lock, it won’t close for some reason, it’s sitting wonky, the alarm is broken, it makes a weird breeze that never stops fully, when people open that one it hits passerby traffic like bonk….who the fuck knows? They do. They know.
Similarly, there's a parking garage near here where everyone uses the right lane exit and ignores the left lane exit. However, almost everyone wants to go straight after leaving which has to be done from the left lane. But using it I've even had people beep at me, on top of rude looks and gestures.
It wasn't until my time overseas but a part of it is that lines are ingrained in Americans in pre-school. Lines are part of American culture so much from an early age, that it becomes almost instinct for us to stand in lines. My time in Afghanistan I realized that lines were a learned phenomenon. Some cultures never conditioned their citizens to wait in lines, so they ALWAYS gaggle.
What bugs me is when it’s only two doors, and the right lane veers and uses their left door, aka my right door. Everyone follows.
Either way, I have to walk through their lane now because someone was lazy, so I just stick with using the door on my right and walk through the crowd.
I've pointed this out before and people look at me like I have 3 eyes. "Because it's polite" they usually say. But why is it polite? Why is it a thing at all?
I was in a college class with all Asians and they didn't say anything. It's a cultural difference. They think it's awkward to call attention to the loud noise, and I thought it was weird to just ignore it.
My friend is German and he said that means I hope your health improves, but there is a similar sounding word that means I hope your looks improve that he says when the sneezer doesn’t speak German. It’s been years since I heard him say it so unfortunately I done remember the word.
I’m still somewhat Christian (being an American, these days I’m afraid to say that unless I have 5 minutes to explain what it doesn’t & doesn’t mean to me) and I NEVER say it.
I just think it’s stupid. Blessing people is fine and all, but I don’t understand how it’s polite to draw attention to the fact that someone’s body made a noise. Why don’t we have blessings for coughs? or farts? Oh, because that would be silly? Yeah, that’s my point. How ‘bout we just politely ignore sneezes too.
If i have my history right, it's because people used to think you were expelling a demon when you sneeze, so they said "God bless you" to prevent it from getting back in. I guess the phrase just stuck around after knowing better, but I've personally never associated it with religion, just a polite thing to do.
I would guess this stems from people assuming that introverts are not speaking because they feel shy and like they're not allowed to take up space. Or perhaps they think introverts are social vampires who need to be invited to speak before they can join a conversation.
This is also not really recognizing that extroversion is barely dominant as a trait. It's more about expectation and obligation that when in a social setting you must be social.
Interestingly, in New York the question/ statement is "How ya doin'?" and the only legitimate response is "How ya doin'?"
Same in the UK. You greet your mates with "Alright?" and the response is "Alright?"
It's more of a connection than asking after someone.
So if somebody asks you "How's your day?" maybe reply with the same!
And in the UK, they think that, "How are you?" is actually asking after their health, while in the US, "Y'all right?" would be met with, "Why? Did something hit me?"
I hate. HATE. Any nonsense question like this that requires me to lie in response. I am too autistic for that shit. Do not ask me how I am if you are going to be weird about any answer other than "fantastic!" Even if you say fine or okay people get weird and say things like "just okay?" Especially in the workplace where I'm basically forbidden from giving an honest answer.
My response is almost always "I don't know yet, I just got here!" it gets a chuckle from the other person and is usually the truth. I've noticed that it will change the other person's mood a little bit to swing the interaction towards positive.
I'm autistic too but it grinds my gears when people say this. No offense to you personally but. For a community of people who's always yapping about how good we are at seeing patterns, I don’t understand why suddenly a bunch of us have pattern blindness when it comes to this one little piece of social interaction. Surely after the first 50 or so times of being asked "how are you" when the point of that question is to say hi rather than genuinely inquire about how you are, surely, surely you must have spotted some pattern? And now that you know "how are you" means "hi", why is it so hard to grasp the concept that people are saying hi?
Now someone might come in and start moaning about how neurotypicals speak indirectly all the time and etc. Sure, but I'm not talking about cases where someone wants to say something but doesn't and instead implies it and expects you to figure it out. I'm only talking about this one bit of convention, which again, not that hard to pick up the pattern. None of us speak 100% literally all the time. If you can understand that by saying "bless you" when someone sneezes you're not literally invoking the spirit of god asking to protect that person and that the phrase means something else ("I'm acknowledging your sneeze, hope you're alright"), then you're capable of understanding that "how are you" in specific contexts where people, as a pattern, use it to mean "hi", does in fact mean "hi". I understand communication is tricky and I have problems with it myself but out of all the hills to die our autistic asses on this is the stupidest and it frankly makes us look willfully obtuse and proud of it.
Something I've noticed is that autistic people often mean two things when they say they're good at recognising patterns. The first is completely literal: they're good at recognising patterns. The second is more nuanced, but it's close to the idea that intentionally breaking a pattern they understand and accept is disregulating.
It's not that they don't get it, it's that they don't like it. They don't want to offer a meaningless platitude that doesn't parse in the literal sense.
You run into the same thing sometimes when people on the spectrum say they'll do something in a particular way if you explain and give reasons, but what they actually mean is 'if you can explain it in a way that is more regulating than the current set of beliefs I have about how to do this thing'. If your reasons don't resonate with them, it's equivalent to not giving reasons.
You see exactly this behaviour in neurotypical people. Courtesy of Upton Sinclair: "It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it." People who are incentivised to believe something actually, truly, believe it, and they carefully ensure they will continue to believe it in a ton of small ways.
im finnish so i cant really exactly say what i say but basically if someone asks “how are you” i say “i just am” (idk if it makes sense in english lol) bc like do they actually wanna know how im doing or do they just ask to make convo or wtv?? i HATE when im asked this either way unless its my bf or close friend who i know genuinely wants to know how i am
I don't understand why you would ask a question if you don't actually want an answer.
Like just say "hello" that's still a greeting. That's what I do when I greet people.
The weird one to me though is when people don't return the sentiment... I'm very much in the habit of answering a "Hi, how are you?" With a "I'm good, how are you?" And I wanna say 90% of the time I get some variation of "I'm good thanks"
But occasionally... Very occasionally, my "I'm good, how are you?" Is just met with either silence, or the other person responding with another question. And that one really confuses me.
Like dawg I asked you a question, why did you just ignore it?
If it's a stranger, server, cashier etc. type of person you don't have to answer the question. It's just a greeting. I frequently answer "hi, how are you?" with "hello". I have never had anyone react in a negative way. Only people I know pretty well have sometimes looked at me askance for doing it, so they probably actually wanted to know.
It's probably cultural. I'm very punctual too so I value coming right on time. I hate it when I want someone to come over at a time and they come late. Like, no, I said 7 why the fuck is it 8 and you're not here!
Is that the norm in the US? I'm from South America and from what I've seen it's the other way around. I'm not sure if they make an exception for first class, but when they start boarding calls they request the people in the back of the plane ("zone 1") to board first.
Yep. Cheap seats have to wait in the aisle while everyone puts their bags in the overhead, contain their unruly kids, complains about their seat arrangement, then get shamefully marched past all the posh seats like it's our fault the flight is departing late.
omg like tipping culture in america makes absolutely zero sense.. literally nowhere else makes workers rely on the generosity of strangers instead of paying them properly.
I mean to be fair, working part time at minimum wage still isn't nearly enough to live on. I think the tipping culture is dumb, but these people still aren't paid enough to live.
Swearing to tell the truth.
If I am going to tell the truth I will, I have no need for an oath to hold me to telling the truth.
If I am going to lie, why would an oath force me to tell the truth?
Now I’m curious- you know how witnesses testifying in court are sworn in- If they weren’t given that reminder that honesty is required, would it still be valid to charge them with perjury if they lie? Or is it just a tradition that has no legal significance.
…goes to google… Yup. A “sworn statement” opens the door to perjury charges if it can be shown that they lied.
Can you be charged for lying in general? I mean sure slander/libel, but in general lying is legal(even those cases have additional details). Basically the Court is reminding you that this is important, you aren't just telling a story, you aren't allowed "artistic license" and you have to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
I feel like this goes both ways. If you are going to tell the truth either way, why would an oath bother you? It's just a formality, if you are planning to tell the truth in the first place. I don't understand why this would bother you unless you weren't planning to tell the truth, and the oath freaked you out, and you couldn't say what you wanted to.
I don't think anything in their comment suggested they were bothered by this per se, moreso that they think it's silly and pointless, which is in line with the prompt to name things that we do that don't make sense.
Playing obligatory nice with a person who is pretending to be friendly while they shit-talk behind other people's backs the second they leave the room.
I feel this so fully, why is a religious “deeply held belief” more valid than any other deeply held belief to the point it deserves special treatment? Believing something really hard doesn’t make it more valid.
It's because other people also hold those "deeply held beliefs" and that such beliefs are written down in official books and passed down through centuries. Things being repeated over many people, over long periods of time with worship practices make them seem more "official".
Same, so many social rules are arbitrary, subject to change with uncertain prerequisites, or expected to be ignored (why have the damn rule then if everyone has collectively decided to ignore it???)
Im the same with eye contact, I have to look away to think, and if I have to think deeply, I need to close my eyes completely.
I suppose with the lying it's more to do so with the idea that people tend to avoid eye contact if they're nervous or uncomfortable or ashamed, like I've personally noticed in myself that I'll actively shy away from looking someone in the eye if I'm feeling one of those.
So then if someone asks you something and they notice that you're avoiding eye contact as you answer, the assumption is that you're feeling uncomfortable or ashamed BECAUSE you're lying about something.
everyone says "good" or some variation when asked how they are doing, and if you don't it is considered very strange. what is even the point of asking if you don't want to hear the honest answer?
You absolutely must tip your waiter/waitress because the company they work for fail to pay them properly. I am not sorry serving people is beyond asinine to have to tip for. Why should I have to leave a 15% tip when all you did was fill up my cup one time and asked how it was... Everyone on the planet serve somebody at some point for free and they don't expect tips. I truly don't think a business should be open if they cannot properly pay their employees including waitresses because we are living in a day and age where we need to abolish tipped jobs.
I don’t if its a universal rule but
My father has this weird thing where there’s apparently a “right” and a “wrong” way to turn your belt when you put it in your pants. The “wrong” way is apparently the “feminine” way to do it 😂
That's true!
But back in the day, men did their own shirt buttons while ladies had servants do theirs for them. Most people are right-handed so mens shirts are designed so it's easier if the buttons are on that side and so the ladies shirt buttons faced the other direction so it was easier for servants to do them up.
Nowadays, most ladies no longer have servants buttoning up their shirts, and they just have to suffer the less efficient design because of historical inertia.
I think this comes from the times where men were dressed by their staff. The orientation of things, buttons, zippers, belts, is geared towards staff that would typically be right handed. That's what I heard years ago.
During that time, women did not have zippers or belts so when they eventually came into fashion, women were dressing themselves and so their stuff was geared towards being easier for the women to use - mirror opposite of the male orientation.
here in Finland people don't do that, it's totally ok to stare at the coffee machine with dead fisheyes together without saying anything. if you feel cheerful you can give a tiniest head nod, as long as there is no eye contact
Even if it's open slightly, you should knock. When I visit another persons place, I keep aware of who is where all the time and that reduces surprises for me when I go for a pee.
NECKTIES. I'm sure it evolved over time from something that once had a purpose or reason, but I don't understand why in 2025 it's dressy to wear a silk noose around your neck.
Handshakes. As a germaphobe I despise it. I don't want to grab someone else's nasty hand that they probably didn't wash. We should normalize fist bumping or not touching at all instead. Also, hugs from random family members that I'm pressured into even though I don't like it during family gatherings.
To me, it's like one of those thing, colorful scarves women can use to accessorize, but bring no heat. I don't think ties should be "mandatory", but men already have so few options to accessorize/bring color to their outfit (if they don't want to stand out too much), let them keep this one.
Boys will be boys applies to everything, from targeted harassment by a group or groups to one individual to rough and tumble activities like kill the carrier(king of the hill, etc). One is bullying one is just fun, but boys will be boys is used to excuse horrifying behavior that leads to most boys retreating into silent shells of human beings who never recover.
A lot of social rules make no sense but still serve a purpose. If our culture decided it’s polite to wear an acorn on your nose, then the only purpose is to indicate a small signal that you’re a tiny bit considerate and are participating in society.
And that’s why it’s hard to say the emperor’s got no clothes.
Waiting to eat while others wait for a plate, I get it at formal settings, or maybe someone’s personal private important party it might be done as a marker of significance, but with kitchens stretched, small groups of peeps with wildly different tastes, as the food hits the table and it is hot and fresh, just dig in I say
Idk why saying "bless you" every time someone sneezes is just so annoying. Especially when people sneeze all day long.
My husband and I don't say it at home. Sometimes we even tell each other to shut up as a joke lol. I just never understood the practice. I just want to exist in peace and not have to comment on other people's bodily functions to be polite.
I still do it for other people because I know they like it. But I just wish it wasnt a thing sometimes.
i roll with it but —elbows on the table being rude. don’t know why it’s a thing… unless it just takes up too much space?
edit: 🤯 i was not expecting that sort of response. thank you everyone for sharing their thoughts and upvotes. 😅i feel like i have a better grasp on the subject matter…
Saw a video about this recently! Back when tables were a fancy new thing they were just a board on stands.
Elbows made it tip off!
Completely unnecessary now, just social inertia.
It's like having to leave a blazer button undone. That rule came from sycophants copying the style of a fat noble who couldn't do up his button.
Edit to add: the fact that suits are tailored to make them look better with that button undone is not a counterargument, it reinforces the fact that social trends persist with no purpose outside of being part of the in crowd.
And I thought it came from cavalrymen who had to undo that button when they got on horseback
“Stableboy! Unbutton my lowest button, I must mount a horse for battle and it’ll be ever so irritating otherwise.”
"Not that lowest button! The lowest button on my coat."
I thought there was also a problem with space as the tables were smaller. either way not as much of a deal these days.
Also if your at a dinner party and you have guests to either side of you, your elbows are probably gonna be in their space. Many times as a kind I accidentally elbowed my cousins during Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner lol, we have a big family and had to pack in a little bit when we were allowed at the adult table
Yup, great book about this I just read. Also where the term “room and board” comes from.
The bottom button remaining undone started that way, but a big part of why it still sticks around is that it gives you a more flattering silhouette on a well tailored suit. Especially if you’re not fat, which is kinda ironic.
This drives me crazy. I am am embalmer and I dress people in suits and I always button that second button but there’s this other guy who works with us (he’s younger, thinks he knows everything) that always comes around and unbuttons it for “style” like the corpse is gonna need to sit down at some point? This isn’t the cover or GQ, this is someone’s grandpa, button your damn jackets!
It's not just a "style". The suits are designed and cut around not having the button done.
If you button my lower button, I swear that I will haunt you. If you are gonna do that then you might as well just put my underwear on over my pants.
Not a noble, a king. Edward VII of England.
They meant knob. Fat knob he was.
Ah, I was looking for a generic word but forgot noble didn't include royalty
Kings aren't nobles?
No. Nobles/aristocrats are below royalty.
Gotta have that hierarchy, I suppose
Well these days suits are designed to leave the lower button undone so they actually look best if you leave it unbuttoned.
It’s been like that for at least as long as I’ve been wearing suits — 50 years.
It’s been like that literally ever since the tradition originated, yeah. All suits since King Edward have been cut to leave the bottom button undone.
Presumably this one persists at least partly because it looks better and is more comfortable, too.
Because suits are designed with this in mind. The fabric bunches in the middle and pulls in at the bottom when you do the bottom button.
I used to get stabbed in the elbow with a fork / knife / whatever available utensil when I was a kid.
As an adult, if someone were to try to stab my elbows at the table we're going to have a problem lol.
Most adult/child behaviour methods would be grounds for assault charges if they were done in an adult/adult format. I think once as children we realise this, they tend to slow down and stop. When I realised this at school, canings stopped for me.
When I was a kid (born '86), my dad was big about no elbows on the table. Couldn't remember a specific reason, other than "it's bad manners."
Fast forward, I'm grown, have kids of my own. I don't care too much about elbows on the table, but my husband does, so it's a rule in our house, too.
Go to my parents' place for dinner, remind one of the kids to please get their elbow off the table. Well, my dad had NEVER heard such a thing, and wanted to know why. Like, I don't know dad, I learned it from you.
On ships, sailors had to keep the table from moving too much in rough waters, so they held the table in place with their elbows while eating.
Sailors were considered rude people ("curse like a sailor" etc), and only rude, unsophisticated people would behave in such a way. So eating like a sailor meant you also had no class.
These days, I haven't heard anyone complain about it, and I will eat that way if it is most comfortable. Seating my lefty BIL to the right of a right handed person, though... that causes problems.
If your BIL isnt tactically seating himself, he is a fool unworthy of lefty supremacy
Hahaha, I wish it was that easy. When my husband and I go out to eat with his family (his parents and brother), there are 2 lefties, 3 people with varying degrees of claustrophobia (one who must be on the end, and 2 who can't be fully cornered but can handle sitting to the inside of x person but not y or z person). Then 1 person also has significant hearing loss in at least 1 ear, and has to sit with her good ear towards the center of the table or she can't hear anyone.
It's always an experience when we first get to a table - shuffling around until most of these issues can be accomodated. And that's only 5 people lol.
My brother was born with only one ear and Im left handed (I also have PTSD) so I know what you mean lol
It takes up space but it also can block the people on the side of you. If your elbows are on the table and you’re leaning inward such that the people on your side can’t see past you, that’s where it’s rude.
It’s similar to any social setting where you’re arranged somewhat in a circle and someone moves inward squeezing people out.
Edit: my point was that as the rule still has some sense to it isn’t about actually touching the table with your elbows but only when you’re taking up too much space or blocking people on the sides.
Saying..we should hang out sometime when both people know it’s not going to happen.
But what if it increases the odds of meeting up? I have definitely not always met up with vague acquaintances who I’ve exchanged “we should hangt out some time”s with, but definitely more often than vague acquaintances I haven’t had that exchange with.
For me it's this. I have limited time and by saying that, I'm signaling I do want to hang out, but it's probably going to take some effort.
I have a friend where she invited my family out but we couldn't make it that time, and then we invited her family out but they couldn't make it. The hope being sometime soon we actually will be able to.
Yes, if I tell someone that I want to see them soon, then I do. But I am busy, so it might not be in the next few weeks. We have to put forth the effort to make it happen.
This one I see as involuntary lying. There's a bunch of situations where people do this.
Involuntary is a stretch, but I'll agree that the pressure is absolutely palpable sometimes.
I used to meet an acquaintance randomly who would claim they’d previously thought about calling me.
I got where I’d say “uh huh” in a random mood just to mess with her!
It just shows you don't hate each other, and it's good to not be hated.
A vague plan is not a plan, just well wishes. A specific plan date time location is someone actually being interested. And if you make plans with details and the other person can't .make it and doesn't offer an alternative then they don't want to actually hang out.
How do you know what's in the other person's head though? I've basically never had this exchange and known neither of us means it and I always am putting a little note in my brain to try and hang out with them when we both agree. It's possible I'm alone in this, or that you are, or something in between!
When people are mad because they think someones bored because they yawn. Yawning doesn't always mean tired and never usually means bored haha
I got chastised in front of the whole class for yawning in 4th grade and I still think about how unfair that was. I was too focused on not yawning to even pay attention after that.
I remember when in first grade I was really sleepy and yawned (probably a bit loud) and proceeded to get slapped by the teacher, then I basically never yawned in a social place lol
We regularly have "engineers" (salespeople) come to my job and buy us lunch and "educate us about their technology" (pitch their product)
Last week we had a guy come in and talk at us for an hour when we'd only scheduled 10 minutes (he didn't even buy us lunch) and when I yawned during his spiel he called me out not once, but a second time as I was leaving when he said "I hope I didn't bore you too much"
Great way to sell a product, insult your potential customers.
If a salesman ever said this to me I would just say "yes you did"
I swear those “engineers” are why people hate actual engineers. Had an AT&T guy out to setup my internet and was bitching about engineers the whole time when I’d randomly need to be in the kitchen area of the living room. I was like yeah, fuck them. Let’s make that my password. It was hilarious because I’m an engineer (the nerd in the back kind) 😂 finally told him when he asked about the college memorabilia I had out and what degree I have. His face 😂🤣 but I can commiserate because of the type you described.
I yawn in the middle of conversations out of no where all the time. I am always actively involved in that conversation. I feel like it is like a PC ramping up fan speed to deal with cpu heat. I'm just cooling my brain off to continue thinking about the conversation.
it#s funny, for some reason my body got in the habit of yawning once I arrived at work and finished the whole dressing up, putting bag down etc routine. Coworkers always laugh that I'm still tired, but it's more like a moment of pause after the ~40 minutes morning routine and commute (on public transport)
I am now yawning, and a few others too, you are now yawning thinking about me yawning whilst you yawn about your day
reading this made me yawn. i never yawn out of boredom is that ACTUALLY a thing? i’m just always tired so i yawn often
Yawning is also a way bodies blow of excess CO2. Basically, if you stuff a ton of people in a small room, the CO2 concentration goes way up. If all your people start yawning during your meeting it's because they can't breathe and y'all need to open a GD window.
I get yawning spells sometimes where I start yawning and it just keeps going for a while every couple minutes -ish. I try to breathe more, etc, and nothing helps. It’s completely involuntary and has nothing to do with sleep or boredom or tiredness. I always feel so worried it will be perceived badly because of the social conditioning associated with yawning!
When I was in 4th grade I yawned during class and my bitch teacher called me out in front of the entire class and said I was rude and should feel bad for it. Fuck you Mrs. Rude (her literal name)
Almost everything related to formal clothes. The lowest button on a suit is always unbuttoned, but must always exist. The sleeve must have buttons, despite them being commonly fake. The existence of the tie.
Care you nothing for our bold Croatian mercenaries, Sir?
And the silly French people who decided a utilitarian neckerchief should be turned into high fashion that would eventually devolve into a garrote for the common man!
Seriously. Who the fuck thinks it's a good idea to start the (work) day by tying a rope around your neck?
People who hate their jobs
Those fake buttons are only on cheap suits. Companies needed ways to make suits more affordable for people who cant spend >$1k on a suit, so they had to cut corners and one of the things they did is put fake buttons... another one is the lapel which has a slit in it that doesnt open... another would be how the lapel is folded...
Nonfunctional sleeve buttons make tailoring sleeve length a lot easier, which suit makers know, so even fancier suits may have fake buttons there now too.
And fake pockets.
the tie hides the buttons on the shirt, which is fair enough.
Why is that fair enough? Why must buttons be hidden?
Why must the buttons exist, if only to be hidden?
The common story is that Napoleon had the sleeve buttons put on uniforms so that soldiers wouldn't wipe their noses on their sleeves. Has also been attributed to other military leaders
Just the fact that society can dictate what clothes in general are considered “nicer”. I’ve always found this ridiculous. So putting a collar and more buttons on a shirt somehow makes it “fancier”?
The lowest button is in case I need to draw my sword!
When one person makes an apology and the other person feels obligated to also apologize for something even though they didn’t do anything wrong.
A good trick to beating this one is to say "Thank you" kindly, deliberately, intentionally when you receive a deserved apology.
I used to be so bad about apologizing back, but forcing myself to acknowledge their apology first has helped me to assess whether I actually have anything to apologize for in return.
I’ve had to substitute “it’s okay” for “thank you for apologizing” because if it was okay they wouldn’t need to apologize in the first place.
I’ve adopted the Australian phrase “no worries”. It’s a useful little sentence for many situations.
I think this might be taking it too literally, the "it's okay" after an apology shows that you are accepting their apology, not that what they did doesn't warrant one.
I feel like thanking someone for apologizing doesn't actually show if you accepted it or not.
If someone opens a door, people go through it. It doesn’t matter that there’s 8 unlocked doors that go into the movie theater or mall or whatever, but a couple people start going through one single door and now that is THE ONLY door that people can go through until everyone in eyesight is gone and the cycle can start anew. I can’t stand the odd looks I get when I see a line forming to go into someplace andI just walk past and open a different door and “beat” 7 people inside because they decided to queue instead of just using half a calorie to open a door.
Heh I've always just picked my own door, didn't realize I was being weird
Path of least resistance. Also where I am all the other doors are still locked and you're going to be that guy who has to get back in line.
Every damn time I go in a business with a wide 2 door entrance one of them is locked. So irritating, why have entrance and exit doors (with signage describing them as such) yet only allow the use of one??!
Huge pet peeve for me. Sometime I unlatch the other one. Sometimes the staff latch it back very quickly. Why?
For a reason they know and you don’t. Like a broken lock, it won’t close for some reason, it’s sitting wonky, the alarm is broken, it makes a weird breeze that never stops fully, when people open that one it hits passerby traffic like bonk….who the fuck knows? They do. They know.
Similarly, there's a parking garage near here where everyone uses the right lane exit and ignores the left lane exit. However, almost everyone wants to go straight after leaving which has to be done from the left lane. But using it I've even had people beep at me, on top of rude looks and gestures.
It wasn't until my time overseas but a part of it is that lines are ingrained in Americans in pre-school. Lines are part of American culture so much from an early age, that it becomes almost instinct for us to stand in lines. My time in Afghanistan I realized that lines were a learned phenomenon. Some cultures never conditioned their citizens to wait in lines, so they ALWAYS gaggle.
What bugs me is when it’s only two doors, and the right lane veers and uses their left door, aka my right door. Everyone follows.
Either way, I have to walk through their lane now because someone was lazy, so I just stick with using the door on my right and walk through the crowd.
Happens all the time at certain transit stations.
Saying bless you when someone sneezes. I’m not even Christian but still say it lol
The weird part to me is that humans have the need to say anything when someone sneezes.
I've pointed this out before and people look at me like I have 3 eyes. "Because it's polite" they usually say. But why is it polite? Why is it a thing at all?
Indeed
I was in a college class with all Asians and they didn't say anything. It's a cultural difference. They think it's awkward to call attention to the loud noise, and I thought it was weird to just ignore it.
Cuz nobody likes sneezing and it originates from the wilderness when unexpected stimuli would trigger a sneeze more often
When my close friends do it, I just yell at them and say "will you stop".
Always gets a laugh.
Someone sneezed in a dance class that I attended once and the guest teacher yelled, “Shut up!” (to uproarious laughter).
In Serbia, they say “pis maco” when someone sneezes. It translates to “go away, kitten.”
I say gesundheit.
My friend is German and he said that means I hope your health improves, but there is a similar sounding word that means I hope your looks improve that he says when the sneezer doesn’t speak German. It’s been years since I heard him say it so unfortunately I done remember the word.
But that actually makes more sense than the American way of god somehow making it stop cause you told him to lol obviously it never works either
My friend group says "Godzilla" and instead of "thank you" the reply is "kaiju"
If it's someone in a sneezing fit, first and second time "bless you". Third one I'll say nothing. Anything after 3 "shut up".
you were never told the myth a sneeze was your soul trying to escape and saying bless you forces it back in?
I always reply with "Hail Satan"
Hail Geen
Megustalations!
I’m still somewhat Christian (being an American, these days I’m afraid to say that unless I have 5 minutes to explain what it doesn’t & doesn’t mean to me) and I NEVER say it.
I just think it’s stupid. Blessing people is fine and all, but I don’t understand how it’s polite to draw attention to the fact that someone’s body made a noise. Why don’t we have blessings for coughs? or farts? Oh, because that would be silly? Yeah, that’s my point. How ‘bout we just politely ignore sneezes too.
If i have my history right, it's because people used to think you were expelling a demon when you sneeze, so they said "God bless you" to prevent it from getting back in. I guess the phrase just stuck around after knowing better, but I've personally never associated it with religion, just a polite thing to do.
Telling introverts they should talk more and socialize is totally fine but telling an extrovert to talk less and keep to themselves more is rude.
I would guess this stems from people assuming that introverts are not speaking because they feel shy and like they're not allowed to take up space. Or perhaps they think introverts are social vampires who need to be invited to speak before they can join a conversation.
This is also not really recognizing that extroversion is barely dominant as a trait. It's more about expectation and obligation that when in a social setting you must be social.
We have to do <whatever> because of tradition. Tradition is just peer pressure from dead people.
Tradition and religion are the two worst reasons to do anything.
hows your day today- asking but dont care about it actually.
That one is silly,
Interestingly, in New York the question/ statement is "How ya doin'?" and the only legitimate response is "How ya doin'?" Same in the UK. You greet your mates with "Alright?" and the response is "Alright?" It's more of a connection than asking after someone. So if somebody asks you "How's your day?" maybe reply with the same!
How're ya now?
Goodnyou?
Notsabad
And in the UK, they think that, "How are you?" is actually asking after their health, while in the US, "Y'all right?" would be met with, "Why? Did something hit me?"
I usually respond with "my hemorrhoids are killing me".
I hate. HATE. Any nonsense question like this that requires me to lie in response. I am too autistic for that shit. Do not ask me how I am if you are going to be weird about any answer other than "fantastic!" Even if you say fine or okay people get weird and say things like "just okay?" Especially in the workplace where I'm basically forbidden from giving an honest answer.
The correct answer is always “Good thanks. You?”
My response is almost always "I don't know yet, I just got here!" it gets a chuckle from the other person and is usually the truth. I've noticed that it will change the other person's mood a little bit to swing the interaction towards positive.
I'm autistic too but it grinds my gears when people say this. No offense to you personally but. For a community of people who's always yapping about how good we are at seeing patterns, I don’t understand why suddenly a bunch of us have pattern blindness when it comes to this one little piece of social interaction. Surely after the first 50 or so times of being asked "how are you" when the point of that question is to say hi rather than genuinely inquire about how you are, surely, surely you must have spotted some pattern? And now that you know "how are you" means "hi", why is it so hard to grasp the concept that people are saying hi?
Now someone might come in and start moaning about how neurotypicals speak indirectly all the time and etc. Sure, but I'm not talking about cases where someone wants to say something but doesn't and instead implies it and expects you to figure it out. I'm only talking about this one bit of convention, which again, not that hard to pick up the pattern. None of us speak 100% literally all the time. If you can understand that by saying "bless you" when someone sneezes you're not literally invoking the spirit of god asking to protect that person and that the phrase means something else ("I'm acknowledging your sneeze, hope you're alright"), then you're capable of understanding that "how are you" in specific contexts where people, as a pattern, use it to mean "hi", does in fact mean "hi". I understand communication is tricky and I have problems with it myself but out of all the hills to die our autistic asses on this is the stupidest and it frankly makes us look willfully obtuse and proud of it.
Something I've noticed is that autistic people often mean two things when they say they're good at recognising patterns. The first is completely literal: they're good at recognising patterns. The second is more nuanced, but it's close to the idea that intentionally breaking a pattern they understand and accept is disregulating.
It's not that they don't get it, it's that they don't like it. They don't want to offer a meaningless platitude that doesn't parse in the literal sense.
You run into the same thing sometimes when people on the spectrum say they'll do something in a particular way if you explain and give reasons, but what they actually mean is 'if you can explain it in a way that is more regulating than the current set of beliefs I have about how to do this thing'. If your reasons don't resonate with them, it's equivalent to not giving reasons.
You see exactly this behaviour in neurotypical people. Courtesy of Upton Sinclair: "It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it." People who are incentivised to believe something actually, truly, believe it, and they carefully ensure they will continue to believe it in a ton of small ways.
I once told my boss I was a little tired and he told me “you should never tell your boss that”
im finnish so i cant really exactly say what i say but basically if someone asks “how are you” i say “i just am” (idk if it makes sense in english lol) bc like do they actually wanna know how im doing or do they just ask to make convo or wtv?? i HATE when im asked this either way unless its my bf or close friend who i know genuinely wants to know how i am
Yeah I hate it too...
I don't understand why you would ask a question if you don't actually want an answer.
Like just say "hello" that's still a greeting. That's what I do when I greet people.
The weird one to me though is when people don't return the sentiment... I'm very much in the habit of answering a "Hi, how are you?" With a "I'm good, how are you?" And I wanna say 90% of the time I get some variation of "I'm good thanks"
But occasionally... Very occasionally, my "I'm good, how are you?" Is just met with either silence, or the other person responding with another question. And that one really confuses me.
Like dawg I asked you a question, why did you just ignore it?
If it's a stranger, server, cashier etc. type of person you don't have to answer the question. It's just a greeting. I frequently answer "hi, how are you?" with "hello". I have never had anyone react in a negative way. Only people I know pretty well have sometimes looked at me askance for doing it, so they probably actually wanted to know.
"Hi, how are you?" "Good, you?" "Good!". So unnecessary. I'm just buying gum. I don't even know you.
What if I genuinely care when I ask?
When someone says "The party starts at 8" but no one shows up until like 8:30 - 8:45
I abide by this rule because I know I have to, but it's so stupid
😳 it’s a rule? i always show up on time
It's probably cultural. I'm very punctual too so I value coming right on time. I hate it when I want someone to come over at a time and they come late. Like, no, I said 7 why the fuck is it 8 and you're not here!
You could be in a room full of people all on their phone, but the nanosecond someone pulls out a book they're the rude one.
I cheat this by having my books on my phone! It’s great
I used to get scolded in elementary school for reading in the halls on the way to class. Looks like I was just a few decades early, suckers.
people at the back of the plane board last.
Is that the norm in the US? I'm from South America and from what I've seen it's the other way around. I'm not sure if they make an exception for first class, but when they start boarding calls they request the people in the back of the plane ("zone 1") to board first.
Yep. Cheap seats have to wait in the aisle while everyone puts their bags in the overhead, contain their unruly kids, complains about their seat arrangement, then get shamefully marched past all the posh seats like it's our fault the flight is departing late.
omg like tipping culture in america makes absolutely zero sense.. literally nowhere else makes workers rely on the generosity of strangers instead of paying them properly.
Kind of interesting - the minimum wage exclusion for wait staff in California is gone. They make a full wage.
CA residents - are people still tipping 15-20%?
I mean to be fair, working part time at minimum wage still isn't nearly enough to live on. I think the tipping culture is dumb, but these people still aren't paid enough to live.
Agree, but it's a big difference making $15ish an hour today versus $2.33 a day before the law change went into effect.
Swearing to tell the truth.
If I am going to tell the truth I will, I have no need for an oath to hold me to telling the truth.
If I am going to lie, why would an oath force me to tell the truth?
Because then it becomes perjury and you can go to jail if you get caught lying
Now I’m curious- you know how witnesses testifying in court are sworn in- If they weren’t given that reminder that honesty is required, would it still be valid to charge them with perjury if they lie? Or is it just a tradition that has no legal significance.
…goes to google… Yup. A “sworn statement” opens the door to perjury charges if it can be shown that they lied.
So without a sworn statement a charge of perjury can not be made if they lie?
I think so, but no court ever is going to let a sworn statement slide
Can you be charged for lying in general? I mean sure slander/libel, but in general lying is legal(even those cases have additional details). Basically the Court is reminding you that this is important, you aren't just telling a story, you aren't allowed "artistic license" and you have to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
I feel like this goes both ways. If you are going to tell the truth either way, why would an oath bother you? It's just a formality, if you are planning to tell the truth in the first place. I don't understand why this would bother you unless you weren't planning to tell the truth, and the oath freaked you out, and you couldn't say what you wanted to.
I don't think anything in their comment suggested they were bothered by this per se, moreso that they think it's silly and pointless, which is in line with the prompt to name things that we do that don't make sense.
"Do you swear to tell the truth?"
"I do, you bastard."
Shaking hands
If you can think of a better way for us to exchange our germs I'd like to hear it.
Open-mouth kisses for everyone!
How else will people know I'm not concealing an improvised weapon in that hand?
Playing obligatory nice with a person who is pretending to be friendly while they shit-talk behind other people's backs the second they leave the room.
Being forced to respect peoples specific brand of delusion just because its labeled as a widely accepted religion.
I feel this so fully, why is a religious “deeply held belief” more valid than any other deeply held belief to the point it deserves special treatment? Believing something really hard doesn’t make it more valid.
It's because other people also hold those "deeply held beliefs" and that such beliefs are written down in official books and passed down through centuries. Things being repeated over many people, over long periods of time with worship practices make them seem more "official".
Kind of everything? I'm autistic so nothing social wise makes sense.
I guess one example would be eyes. You look away and suddenly you're lying? No, I look around to think.
Same, so many social rules are arbitrary, subject to change with uncertain prerequisites, or expected to be ignored (why have the damn rule then if everyone has collectively decided to ignore it???)
Im the same with eye contact, I have to look away to think, and if I have to think deeply, I need to close my eyes completely.
I suppose with the lying it's more to do so with the idea that people tend to avoid eye contact if they're nervous or uncomfortable or ashamed, like I've personally noticed in myself that I'll actively shy away from looking someone in the eye if I'm feeling one of those.
So then if someone asks you something and they notice that you're avoiding eye contact as you answer, the assumption is that you're feeling uncomfortable or ashamed BECAUSE you're lying about something.
This is a great example, because while all of that analysis is true, people don't always look away because they're uncomfortable.
Some people are more likely to look away when they are comfortable, because they have relaxed enough to stop thinking about it.
Not taking the middle urinal must follow
If it the only one available I’m taking it
Nah, the rule is separate by at least one until separation is no longer possible.
Money over well being
Asking how people are and getting mad or upset if they answer honestly.
everyone says "good" or some variation when asked how they are doing, and if you don't it is considered very strange. what is even the point of asking if you don't want to hear the honest answer?
You absolutely must tip your waiter/waitress because the company they work for fail to pay them properly. I am not sorry serving people is beyond asinine to have to tip for. Why should I have to leave a 15% tip when all you did was fill up my cup one time and asked how it was... Everyone on the planet serve somebody at some point for free and they don't expect tips. I truly don't think a business should be open if they cannot properly pay their employees including waitresses because we are living in a day and age where we need to abolish tipped jobs.
I don’t if its a universal rule but My father has this weird thing where there’s apparently a “right” and a “wrong” way to turn your belt when you put it in your pants. The “wrong” way is apparently the “feminine” way to do it 😂
I believe womans pants and shirts/blazers are backwards as well. Someone correct me if I'm wrong
That's true!
But back in the day, men did their own shirt buttons while ladies had servants do theirs for them. Most people are right-handed so mens shirts are designed so it's easier if the buttons are on that side and so the ladies shirt buttons faced the other direction so it was easier for servants to do them up.
Nowadays, most ladies no longer have servants buttoning up their shirts, and they just have to suffer the less efficient design because of historical inertia.
I think this comes from the times where men were dressed by their staff. The orientation of things, buttons, zippers, belts, is geared towards staff that would typically be right handed. That's what I heard years ago.
During that time, women did not have zippers or belts so when they eventually came into fashion, women were dressing themselves and so their stuff was geared towards being easier for the women to use - mirror opposite of the male orientation.
When people said “ how are you and keep walking “ they are not interested . If people could just said good morning , hi , hello. To be real .
here in Finland people don't do that, it's totally ok to stare at the coffee machine with dead fisheyes together without saying anything. if you feel cheerful you can give a tiniest head nod, as long as there is no eye contact
Knocking on the bathroom door when it’s already locked.
It lets you know that someone is waiting so maybe stop scrolling reddit and finish up
or just closed. Especially with true with aunts and uncles that are visiting.
But if it's closed, you SHOULD knock instead of trying to open it?
Even if it's open slightly, you should knock. When I visit another persons place, I keep aware of who is where all the time and that reduces surprises for me when I go for a pee.
The fact that you have to wear suits to things, such a pointless outfit
NECKTIES. I'm sure it evolved over time from something that once had a purpose or reason, but I don't understand why in 2025 it's dressy to wear a silk noose around your neck.
The four times a man wears a suit:
You don't necessarily need a suit for job interviews any more unless it's corporate culture. I was the only person wearing a tie at my last interview.
I agree lol, it's like they make them uncomfortable on purpose
Anything properly tailored will not be uncomfortable. But tailoring is expensive, and most people don't know how to do it themselves anymore, so ...
Men shake hands, women hug
Handshakes. As a germaphobe I despise it. I don't want to grab someone else's nasty hand that they probably didn't wash. We should normalize fist bumping or not touching at all instead. Also, hugs from random family members that I'm pressured into even though I don't like it during family gatherings.
Saying “how are you?” without actually listening.
No stripping in the elevator
Park on a driveway and drive on a parkway.
Taking your hat off for the national anthem. Settle down, it’s a hat.
Taking your hat off for anything, really. Never understood why a hat is rude, but only in certain situations.
Is that a thing? In my country we can't even remember half of the word of our national anthem.
Lucky you, in our country we fall asleep whilst it's on as it's soooooo bloody dull.
Tipping
Wearing a tie at a "formal" occasion.
The most useless accessory in history.
To me, it's like one of those thing, colorful scarves women can use to accessorize, but bring no heat. I don't think ties should be "mandatory", but men already have so few options to accessorize/bring color to their outfit (if they don't want to stand out too much), let them keep this one.
I love wearing ties. One of the very few opportunities men ever get to properly accessorize with anything colorful or interesting.
Saying bless you after a sneeze.
Boys will be boys applies to everything, from targeted harassment by a group or groups to one individual to rough and tumble activities like kill the carrier(king of the hill, etc). One is bullying one is just fun, but boys will be boys is used to excuse horrifying behavior that leads to most boys retreating into silent shells of human beings who never recover.
"We'll keep in touch" we both know we won't
A lot of social rules make no sense but still serve a purpose. If our culture decided it’s polite to wear an acorn on your nose, then the only purpose is to indicate a small signal that you’re a tiny bit considerate and are participating in society.
And that’s why it’s hard to say the emperor’s got no clothes.
Waiting to eat while others wait for a plate, I get it at formal settings, or maybe someone’s personal private important party it might be done as a marker of significance, but with kitchens stretched, small groups of peeps with wildly different tastes, as the food hits the table and it is hot and fresh, just dig in I say
Idk why saying "bless you" every time someone sneezes is just so annoying. Especially when people sneeze all day long. My husband and I don't say it at home. Sometimes we even tell each other to shut up as a joke lol. I just never understood the practice. I just want to exist in peace and not have to comment on other people's bodily functions to be polite. I still do it for other people because I know they like it. But I just wish it wasnt a thing sometimes.