I don't know if it counts. Belomorsk petroglyphs, Karelia, Russia. 4000-3000 BC [2560x1707]
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  • 581 points rbentoski

    The foresight to use skis to travel but not cover your junk is kinda funny. Guy in the front definitely is the most realistic though lol.

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    303 points cursedwitheredcorpse

    In these old rock arts we see this in the nordic bronze age rock art too but showing the penises wasnt a way to show these people were naked literally. Its to show the people were males

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    86 points damnedspot

    I think they’re just bananas for scale

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    11 points bobbyfiend

    I wondered about that. Thanks.

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    26 points chickey23

    I think it's also rank distinction. In larger groups, only the leaders are depicted this way.

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    6 points SerendipitySue

    that is interesting. that might indicate their hoods or hats are not gender specific.

    Also perhaps .there might be depictions of female skiers around looking much the same except for the penis.

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    7 points KwordShmiff

    With some tig ol bitties.

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    9 points Madock345

    There’s no real way to confirm what it’s meant to represent, that’s a decent theory since we know these people used clothing, but it could easily be depicting specific rites, athletic contests, or circumstances where they didn’t.

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    5 points cursedwitheredcorpse

    Of course! There are reasons to be naked spiritually in cultures rituals etc so I get that idea too but I think my theory about it is pretty good from all the art ive seen mainly i look into nordic brozne age art tho

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    3 points HugsandHate

    Naked males.

    Prove me wrong.

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    -6 points Hardsoxx

    How dare you assume their gender.😂

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    12 points atlas_eater

    There’s a ski movie film Valhalla (21 min mark) that has an epic bare naked ski scene.

    YouTube link.

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    6 points EternalOctoMystic

    Well that was a fun detour. Thanks!

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    3 points NuclearCake0

    That really was epic!🤘 I appreciate there was equal representation for once. 10/10.

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    16 points krypt0nKNIGHT

    Dudes a grower not a show-er! Lay off him.

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    24 points Jazzspasm

    To add a “little” something - if it’s cold enough for snow, then having a dong slapping around that looks as enthusiastic as the ones these guys are sporting, and not the hidden gem that freezing temperatures usually create, then i for one am impressed - and perhaps that’s the point?

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    23 points Dr_Insomnia

    you went a really round way and almost got there - it is to show they are male, not that skiing makes them hard as diamonds. Close!

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    18 points Jazzspasm

    well, if skiing doesn’t make you powerfully erect, maybe snowboarding is more your thing

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    5 points pinot2me

    Hmmm. Female here, not understanding why something rather dangerous, needing full attention and requiring some physical skill would prompt an erection. Seems counter-productive… 🤔

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    11 points Dr_Insomnia

    This just is outting yourself that you've never had sex with a man while skydiving and that says a lot about you!

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    -6 points Jazzspasm

    it’s a guy thing, because doing something super fun and adventurous, possibly involves physical injury at least - it gives us a bit of a stiffy - it’s a joke that all guys get… because…

    …you did just describe a thing - find a woman ”rather dangerous, needs full attention and requiring some physical skill”, and I’ll find you around a hundred guys that are getting a twitch warning about a chubby at the very idea

    Edit - never answer a question like that from a woman in good faith “Why do men get a hard on from something potentially dangerous, demanding full attention and physical skill?”

    The real answer needed is “I have no idea” and never joke about it amongst your guy friends infront of a “female here” 👈🏽

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    2 points Scuzzbag

    Oh I thought thats why they call some ski slopes black diamond, like it was some BBC adventure trail

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    2 points Herrjeminewtf

    How do you know that's the reason?

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    5 points pootin54

    Pretty sure that’s an early prototype Razer Scooter.

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    4 points The_Observatory_

    Trying to cover your junk with skis might be a little uncomfortable

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    3 points Omg_Itz_Winke

    Have you ever tried to cover your peen with skis? Id rather just use them to ski

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    12 points LitoBrooks

    Call them jewels - not junk ! 😂😂😂

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    10 points ThreeLeggedMare

    Yours may be jewels, mine is for sure junk

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    2 points ConditionTall1719

    Front one is young

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  • 85 points Chance_Guarantee4823

    Ski trip?

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    39 points Otherwise_Jump

    A naked skiing trip at that

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    50 points eNte19

    No phones, just the boys out skiing, living in the moment as it were..

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    15 points mtntrail

    Likely having a gay old time.

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    5 points SkylarAV

    Looks like an erotic ski trip

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  • 39 points Fast_Garlic_5639

    Looks like a naked biathlon

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    7 points PerformerOk450

    There's 3 of them so probably a Tri-athlon ?😂

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  • 45 points Einherjar07

    Dicks out for fresh powder?

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    4 points wtfunder

    I got these cheeeseburgers, man!!

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    2 points Einherjar07

    Pleeeaseee maaaan

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  • 28 points lynivvinyl

    Gun skiing with your dick out and nothing but a hat and a backpack.

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  • 18 points Edenoide

    'We are very excited to take part in this ski touring experience, Mike!' - 'I can see that...'

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  • 57 points Gabon08

    Is this real? People were skiing in 4000 bc?

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    174 points denn23rus

    Skis, ski poles and dog sleds were used by humans before pottery

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    39 points Gabon08

    Its crazy to think, living so up north during prehistoric times.

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    76 points denn23rus

    Well-tailored, high-quality warm clothing already existed back then (they didn't walk around like the Flintstones in leather vests). It's well known from ethnography that northerners rarely talk about the cold. Why talk about something that's always been there from the day you were born? You just get used to it and live with it. On the plus side, there are endless herds of reindeer, so you'll never die of hunger.

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    3 points Previous-Pangolin-60

    They found an assumed Neanderthal cave in Finland estimated to be anywhere between 70,000 and 250,000 years old (numbers missing from English translation), so there have been people living up here before the last ice age.

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    3 points 7LeagueBoots

    Doesn’t seem to be confirmed, and to my knowledge there have been no confirmed Neanderthal sites in Europe north of what’s now the Baltic Sea.

    They certainly could have been that far north during interglacial periods, but confirmation is needed to assert that they actually were.

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    2 points Previous-Pangolin-60

    You're probably right, didn't find any confirmation for any of the findings yet. I've always wanted to visit that part of Karelia to see all the stone carvings and petroglyphs (too bad it's apart of Russia now).

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    7 points [deleted]

    [deleted]

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    10 points VroomCoomer

    I don't know about sleds, but DNA sequencing tells us that humans domesticated dogs just before or during the last Glacial Maxiumum 20,000-40,000 years ago. So we had plenty of time for it to be cold and have dogs.

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    2 points bobbyfiend

    This is blowing my mind.

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    33 points cursedwitheredcorpse

    Since ice age dude https://www.snowfeetstore.com/blogs/snowfeet_skiskates_skiboards_snowblades_skiblades_mini_skis_short_skis/history-of-skiing?srsltid=AfmBOopB_A-Y4_kVrPsSnI0-umGjIEzxWliz9Ncy3lEP29IdgNXyGV2m our ancestors are much smarter then we give credit

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    8 points trowzerss

    They were probably just as smart as us, but with less technology and knowledge to build on.

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    18 points SkisaurusRex

    Yeah, putting wood on your feet to travel through deep snow is very very old

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    2 points john133435

    Homo Sap has been around for awhile, and we learned a few things in the interim...

    The last major ice age, called the Pleistocene Epoch or Great Ice Age, spanned roughly 2.6 million to 11,700 years ago, featuring cycles of cold glacial periods and warmer interglacials; its peak, the Last Glacial Maximum (LGM), occurred about 20,000 years ago, with massive ice sheets covering much of North America and Europe before melting, leading us into our current warmer interglacial, the Holocene.

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  • 10 points Windturnscold

    Dan Davis has a fascinating documentary on YouTube about the use of phalluses in rock art

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  • 7 points Relevant_Head_9198

    These Bros get it.

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  • 6 points DrSpaceman667

    You make Zog peepee too short. Zog kill you both.

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  • 6 points Orgidee

    They’re just friends on a boys weekend away

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  • 5 points tvieno

    Interesting. They had the biathalon 5-6000 years ago.

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  • 3 points This_Currency7054

    Paddle boarding knew we were late to the paddle board game

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  • 24 points Joysticksummoner

    Free Karelia!

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  • 3 points AppropriateOil3785

    And this is the origin story of the Boner Biathlon that we have every four years in the Winter Olympics

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  • 9 points DungeonAssMaster

    Fins leaving the sauna to fight Russians.

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  • 3 points Fantastic_You_8204

    counts. nice.

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  • 3 points ArrivalIntrepid9795

    Wow, I mean, are they skiing?

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    5 points Kubliah

    I would wager sleds were invented first, probably not long after weapons were made. Dragging a dead animal like a deer is soo much easier on a sled, and could be fashioned out the bark pretty quickly. After that, snowshoes and ski's seem like a pretty logical extrapalation of spreading surface area out to stay on top of the snow.

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  • 3 points SerendipitySue

    i wonder if this is one skier shown across time and distance..basically running out of food and getting skinnier

    ..or three skiers

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  • 3 points NotABot420number2

    Me and who

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  • 5 points Eriic91

    Thats in Finland 🇫🇮

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  • 2 points CatKungFu

    A french foreign legionnaire leading two horny old men back to the fort?

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  • 4 points nidjah

    Karelia is Finland!

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  • 4 points Cassandraburry2008

    Karelia, “russia”.

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  • 2 points Yarder89

    They done the dirty on my guy at the front

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  • 2 points Mental_Salamander_68

    Poor bstrds...their noses are longer than their penises.

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    4 points CanadianJogger

    Poor sniffer, yours isn't!

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  • 2 points Hrafna_N7

    So we really been out here with our homies drawin our dicks on the wall, clearly making one significantly smaller to fuck with him for thousands of years

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  • 2 points Happy-Dress1179

    wonderful!

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  • 2 points Hello_Hangnail

    Walkin' along, singin' a song, waving my d___

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  • 2 points ConvertedIron

    Wieners and skis!

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  • 2 points ApproxKnowledgeCat

    Have you ever played the game tellestrations? It’s like the word repeating game telephone but instead you’re drawing then guessing then drawing again. I always draw a wiener to show men and boobs for women. Quickest way to get the point across

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  • 2 points Particular-Office156

    This isnt porn

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  • 2 points bluealmostgreen

    Karelia is the occupied part of Finland. Not russia.

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  • 2 points OccasionallyImmortal

    Belomorsk-back mountain

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  • 2 points Cosmoaquanaut

    Dicks out. For Harambe.

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  • -1 points Romanitedomun

    Porn artefact, really porn. Banana (again!) for scale?

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  • -6 points SandersSol

    Almost guarantee this is fake, ...because russia.

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    1 points denn23rus

    Why?

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    0 points sipu36

    Nah. I've been there. Hate russians for fucking up this otherwise very beautiful place. These petroglyhs were made by ancient Finno-Ugric people. If these were made by the Slavs, then these figures would show somebody impaled on a pike or something violent.

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