Even in a women-orientated subreddit meant for women and girls to find community and exchange advice, women still think subjecting themselves to a dangerous environment in an effort to find security, be it financial, social or otherwise is a good option.
How come some women and girls in 2025 believe they would become independent if they briefly sell themselves to a man? We (primarily in the west) enjoy autonomy our forefathers could only imagine, and this is the ideal moment to pursue education and a job. Why would you want to put yourself in such a risky position? Is the money really worth being used like a product?
I actually adore that subreddit, and I really feel like it fosters a nice environment where women/girls can find advice, compassion and genuine community, but the number of women who so quickly offered their services and seriously commented about wanting to find a sugar daddy really bummed me out. Not to mention the amount of comments, why is this the post with the second-highest number of comments in that subreddit's history? We know why but still. Sadly funny that even in a subreddit meant for just women/girls, men still felt like it was their place to offer themselves as an SD.
Only two sex workers I know well enough are sex workers because for one of them her ADHD made her trying to work normal jobs and education so much hell that she just couldn't deal, and the other just got kinda dropped by the train because she immigrated at an early age and people didn't have patience to look into how much she actually understands the language she was being taught on and how much she was just nodding along because she didn't want to make trouble as little kid (she is white, dunno if that contributed to everyones automatic assumption).
I don't think that empowers them, I think it just spares them from the opposite of being empowered so they treat it like it did empower them because in other options they would have had even less autonomy. Maybe when you get to choose between something and humiliation, the something starts looking like it's giving you some power when it's not. I wonder if some of the young women and girls who are talking about sugar daddies are simply feeling so powerless overall that they make the same error in thinking.
I have ADHD and I'm struggling so much with "normal" jobs too. I feel so much pain when I read things like this. It's like if you're marginalized as a woman the only option left is to sell yourself. People like me are honestly very vulnerable in this shitty world that people consider as "normal".
Smh 🤦♀️ well that sucks. that’s honestly why I avoid and am wary of women’s issue subs or even feminist subs. There’s all this confusion about what it means to be a feminist, calling other people a bad feminist, calling things feminist that are definitely NOT, bad advice for women, and no matter what we’re always under scrutiny.
Meanwhile…people are openly and publically looking for SDs and trying to willingly financially depend on men in exchange for sexual favors?? Bad idea…but okay…it’s your life.
If what it means to be valued under patriarchy includes giving up my autonomy, the ability to pursue education and live independently, and self-respect, then I don’t want to be valued by them.
Every 30+ women’s group I’m in, in a nutshell. They’re either crying about fearing being alone forever/not having kids, asking for advice “on the apps” (vomit), asking for Botox/filler/surgery recommendations, asking where to find SDs, asking where to find wealthy men. One woman even talked about volunteering at the democratic convention just to meet men. It’s so much desperation and other women validating it.
I honestly catch myself apologizing more to the men at my work sometimes. Without even meaning to. I think it’s partially fear of retaliation from them, staying wary and apologizing to throw some water over their emotions in case they get angry at me, and a fear of being imperfect and making mistakes in front of them.
It really is so socially conditioned into us and it goes deep, many of us don’t unlearn it unless we actively try to stay conscious of it.
It's like, just go outside and breath on the first ape you see. That's how you get one of these disgusting, loose-balled cryptkeepers. It's not hard lol.
Also, many of these women who claim to be making tons of money often aren't making as much as they say. It's all just one big cope so they feel better about choosing to fuck rapists that make the world unsafe for all women.
It's kind of funny that millennial men, all the way down to gen z, (and most likely gen alpha,) aren't even going to be able to claim to be sugar daddies in the future because way too many of them are broke and don't have jobs 🤣. This is a new shift for men. As a collective, they are all just sitting at home, not working or getting an education. What are these women going to do then? Sugar daddies eventually won't even be a thing because men don't go to work anymore, so they have no money to hypothetically give out.
Here I'll say that, being broke is not just a men problem. It's a capitalism problem. I'm currently literally sitting at home because I had to quit my job due to health issues and ADHD. Capitalism hits women much harder too, particularly disabled women. And sooner or later most people will be broke :-/
As a collective, they are all just sitting at home, not working or getting an education. What are these women going to do then? Sugar daddies eventually won't even be a thing because men don't go to work anymore, so they have no money to hypothetically give out.
Indeed. They've always been shit, but at least they used to keep a job back in the day. I don't know what these chicks are going to do...
Something about the topic of sw makes male identified women absolutely livid. It's the one red flag question to ask the women in your life, though. Makes it easy to know where most women stand on the topic of men.
I low-key thought about this when I was 8-ish years old, knowing I can't fall in love with a man, I came to a conclusion: I'll just marry rich. And that's a bit terrifying that I thought this way at such age... Ideas that a marriage is a "must have" is drilled into our heads from childhood so people who don't believe in love choose money. It's a sense of stability people crave. We can't blame anyone for that, we're only human. They believe they can't live comfortably without support and it's just sad :/
I think experience is a great teacher. Most women are raised in horrible environments where own father and mother is the first abuser to disrespect their life. With experience, people learn what's best for their survival and learn to love their own life and protect their life from own family, boy friend, society, country, etc.
But some people 'love' to suffer/ be victims of past bad decision forever. That's a coping mechanisms they learned to get attention - any attention/ validation.
For those who refuse to respect their own life and suffer like circus monkey in bad relationships, family set ups - I refuse to be an audience and watch the show. Not interested. No thanks. Please 'suffer away' from me
money is for goods and services. men have made it clear they expect freebies from women because they dont respect us. meaning entering into entanglements with them on the promise of money for a SERVICE is a LOSING transaction for the woman.
better off getting a job and signing off on a contract. and thats saying a lot from me i havent been able to land anything since graduating, im 4b not superwoman.
Even in a women-orientated subreddit meant for women and girls to find community and exchange advice, women still think subjecting themselves to a dangerous environment in an effort to find security, be it financial, social or otherwise is a good option.
How come some women and girls in 2025 believe they would become independent if they briefly sell themselves to a man? We (primarily in the west) enjoy autonomy our forefathers could only imagine, and this is the ideal moment to pursue education and a job. Why would you want to put yourself in such a risky position? Is the money really worth being used like a product?
I actually adore that subreddit, and I really feel like it fosters a nice environment where women/girls can find advice, compassion and genuine community, but the number of women who so quickly offered their services and seriously commented about wanting to find a sugar daddy really bummed me out. Not to mention the amount of comments, why is this the post with the second-highest number of comments in that subreddit's history? We know why but still. Sadly funny that even in a subreddit meant for just women/girls, men still felt like it was their place to offer themselves as an SD.
Only two sex workers I know well enough are sex workers because for one of them her ADHD made her trying to work normal jobs and education so much hell that she just couldn't deal, and the other just got kinda dropped by the train because she immigrated at an early age and people didn't have patience to look into how much she actually understands the language she was being taught on and how much she was just nodding along because she didn't want to make trouble as little kid (she is white, dunno if that contributed to everyones automatic assumption).
I don't think that empowers them, I think it just spares them from the opposite of being empowered so they treat it like it did empower them because in other options they would have had even less autonomy. Maybe when you get to choose between something and humiliation, the something starts looking like it's giving you some power when it's not. I wonder if some of the young women and girls who are talking about sugar daddies are simply feeling so powerless overall that they make the same error in thinking.
I have ADHD and I'm struggling so much with "normal" jobs too. I feel so much pain when I read things like this. It's like if you're marginalized as a woman the only option left is to sell yourself. People like me are honestly very vulnerable in this shitty world that people consider as "normal".
Curious, what is “that subreddit”? It’s cropped out of your screenshot but you’re talking like we should already know 🥴
Smh 🤦♀️ well that sucks. that’s honestly why I avoid and am wary of women’s issue subs or even feminist subs. There’s all this confusion about what it means to be a feminist, calling other people a bad feminist, calling things feminist that are definitely NOT, bad advice for women, and no matter what we’re always under scrutiny.
Meanwhile…people are openly and publically looking for SDs and trying to willingly financially depend on men in exchange for sexual favors?? Bad idea…but okay…it’s your life.
If what it means to be valued under patriarchy includes giving up my autonomy, the ability to pursue education and live independently, and self-respect, then I don’t want to be valued by them.
Every 30+ women’s group I’m in, in a nutshell. They’re either crying about fearing being alone forever/not having kids, asking for advice “on the apps” (vomit), asking for Botox/filler/surgery recommendations, asking where to find SDs, asking where to find wealthy men. One woman even talked about volunteering at the democratic convention just to meet men. It’s so much desperation and other women validating it.
I’m soooo sick of men-centered women but I also understand how deeply this way of thinking has been ingrained in women.
Same, and I still recognize it in myself when it happens. It’s absolutely crazy how much social conditioning really shapes us from the inside out.
I honestly catch myself apologizing more to the men at my work sometimes. Without even meaning to. I think it’s partially fear of retaliation from them, staying wary and apologizing to throw some water over their emotions in case they get angry at me, and a fear of being imperfect and making mistakes in front of them.
It really is so socially conditioned into us and it goes deep, many of us don’t unlearn it unless we actively try to stay conscious of it.
It's like, just go outside and breath on the first ape you see. That's how you get one of these disgusting, loose-balled cryptkeepers. It's not hard lol.
Also, many of these women who claim to be making tons of money often aren't making as much as they say. It's all just one big cope so they feel better about choosing to fuck rapists that make the world unsafe for all women.
It's kind of funny that millennial men, all the way down to gen z, (and most likely gen alpha,) aren't even going to be able to claim to be sugar daddies in the future because way too many of them are broke and don't have jobs 🤣. This is a new shift for men. As a collective, they are all just sitting at home, not working or getting an education. What are these women going to do then? Sugar daddies eventually won't even be a thing because men don't go to work anymore, so they have no money to hypothetically give out.
Here I'll say that, being broke is not just a men problem. It's a capitalism problem. I'm currently literally sitting at home because I had to quit my job due to health issues and ADHD. Capitalism hits women much harder too, particularly disabled women. And sooner or later most people will be broke :-/
Indeed. They've always been shit, but at least they used to keep a job back in the day. I don't know what these chicks are going to do...
This is a sex trafficking pipeline isn't it ? As is, even regular relationships with men is prostitution and I can't even imagine this BS.
Women don’t realise most dating advice is repackaged tricks from SW workers. Yes the same group that people infamously look down on
Something about the topic of sw makes male identified women absolutely livid. It's the one red flag question to ask the women in your life, though. Makes it easy to know where most women stand on the topic of men.
How do you get a sugar daddy? You find a man to exploit you and you allow him to do it
I low-key thought about this when I was 8-ish years old, knowing I can't fall in love with a man, I came to a conclusion: I'll just marry rich. And that's a bit terrifying that I thought this way at such age... Ideas that a marriage is a "must have" is drilled into our heads from childhood so people who don't believe in love choose money. It's a sense of stability people crave. We can't blame anyone for that, we're only human. They believe they can't live comfortably without support and it's just sad :/
[deleted]
He has been banned from further posting. Thank you.
I think experience is a great teacher. Most women are raised in horrible environments where own father and mother is the first abuser to disrespect their life. With experience, people learn what's best for their survival and learn to love their own life and protect their life from own family, boy friend, society, country, etc.
But some people 'love' to suffer/ be victims of past bad decision forever. That's a coping mechanisms they learned to get attention - any attention/ validation.
For those who refuse to respect their own life and suffer like circus monkey in bad relationships, family set ups - I refuse to be an audience and watch the show. Not interested. No thanks. Please 'suffer away' from me
I have Netflix for better drama/ shows.
money is for goods and services. men have made it clear they expect freebies from women because they dont respect us. meaning entering into entanglements with them on the promise of money for a SERVICE is a LOSING transaction for the woman.
better off getting a job and signing off on a contract. and thats saying a lot from me i havent been able to land anything since graduating, im 4b not superwoman.